Accidents happen
by crazydbzfan87
Summary: Accidents happen everyday! You drop a caludron, rip your robes on a branch. But how many times do you accidently spill love potion all over one of your best mate? RL/SB slash, don't like, don't read!
1. Chapter 1

Accidents happen

A/N: Hey there. I'm not normally one to write yaoi stuff but…well, I thought I'd give it a shot. I hope no one's used this idea; I didn't really have time to check if they did. If anyone has, I apologize in advance. Out of all the pairs I've seen I love Remus/Sirius. Most the stories I see are fluffy but this one has a bit of a different take. Whether it's fluffy or not is somethin' you'll have to decide as you read I'll tell you right now, it has it's moments but then… er, it has his _not_ moments. Now look, let's get one thing straight before you read, if you hate the pairing, hey, whatevers, fine with me. Don't flame me just 'cuz you don't like the couple. I don't want to get reviews saying 'hey they're not gay because, blah, blah, blah, bling, bling, bling, blah' whatever your reasoning is. That's your opinion and I'm totally ok with that, but I DO NOT, want to see it on my fic review page. If you're gonna flame me, do it because I depicted a character wrong or my plot is stupid, not 'cuz the pairing, kay? That's all I ask. The pairing doesn't interest me, I want to know if _**I'm**_ (as an author) doing anything wrong. If I am, flame the hell outta me, you know? OR, you can take the highroad and instead of screaming at me, give me some CONSTRUCTIVE criticism. I'd appreciate that a lot more. This story takes place while their still in Hogwarts and if there are any specific things that go on in the story you don't understand or just wanna talk about please don't hesitate to ask me about it. Well, that's about all I have to say right now so, enjoy!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rolling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it really bothers you or something (although I can't see why it would, I mean, it is called fan_fiction_ after all).

**Chapter 1**

The sun rose high over Hogwarts and shone in nearly every window, signaling the start of a new day. As the creatures in the Forbidden forest as well as the students of Hogwarts began to stir, one did not. The sun was actually quite easy to ignore, a pillow bashing you over the head however, wasn't so much as Remus Lupin found out.

"Moony, wake up!" James' voice all but broke his eardrums as it rang in his head. Though his eyes were still closed, he could tell that James had moved away for the moment.

Remus groaned and pulled the abandoned pillow over his head "Go…away…"

"Ah come on Rem! You'll want to be awake for this! We gotta get to the Great Hall!" James said excitedly.

Unable to get back to the wonderful sleep he was just in; Remus forced his eyes open and sat up grumpily "Why? You gonna get an award for being the school's biggest prat?"

He was a bit crankier then he normally would be in the morning, seeing as last night had harbored the full moon. He was just too tired and too sore to care what words came out his mouth today. Being a werewolf had more then it's fair share of downsides. Last night he might have looked about his age (as a werewolf, he's always looked older then he actually was with tired lines on his face and his hair flickering between its natural tawny and gray) but now he looked so worn he seemed to have aged at least 6 years.

He winced as he moved; his body still held painful reminders of the previous night and protested against all movement. Still, Remus ignored the pain and merely rubbed the soreness he felt in his arms as he began to fully wake up.

A bark of laughter met his last comment from his left. Sirius sat on his bed apparently just woken up by James to "Good one Moony."

James frowned at his 'friends'. "No." he said flatly "Today is the day Lily Evans will finally fall for my charms! As you know, she's been in a bit of denial state for a while now, but today…" he trailed off at that, grin once more on his face.

"Really? And counting now, how many 'today's is that?" Remus muttered as he rummaged around his trunk, gathering his cloths together. He was _really_ sore this morning.

This to earned a laugh from Sirius but James was impassive to this comment and smiled "Aha! But today's different. This time, I've got a secrete weapon…it's Valentines Day!" he finished triumphantly.

Peter looked at their leader confusedly "So?"

James grinned "So?! So no girl wants to be alone on Valentines Day right? Well, that, combined with what I've got for her in the Great Hall, there's no why she'll resist me any more.

Remus rolled his eyes and got his things for the showers then went off, not wanting to hear about another one of his 'fool proof' plans to get Lily Evans.

---

Once they had all washed and dressed themselves, the four Marauders went down to the Great Hall for breakfast and as they went, James' surprise turned into a bit of a guessing game.

"Um…you…uh, got her a life time supply of…ahh…perfume or something?" Sirius guessed.

James shook his head, a grin that seemed glued to his face "Nope!"

"You…spiked her pumpkin juice with a love potion?" Peter suggested.

For the first time James frowned, looking disgusted with the very idea "No! That's low and underhanded…I want Lily to like me on her own, thank you very much! And I'm not a coward enough to drug her into it. What would that say about my honor?"

Remus did not take part in the little game however; he was too preoccupied with the aches of the night before. This happened every morning once a month, his own little 'period' as James and Sirius put it. He checked out the damage he did to himself in the shower to see how bad it was. It appeared that last night he'd tried to rip his leg off so he had a terrible limp as he walked and his arms were really hurting, though he couldn't remember why. It was always fuzzy when he tried to think about what he'd done. As they went down the stairs it didn't seem too bad until he almost fell down the last ones. Luckily, his friends were there to grab his robes and keep him up as he muttered angrily about the moon.

Peter smiled slightly "Don't worry Remus! Once we've got the Animagus thing worked out-"

"Shh!" Sirius hissed; cutting him off as a group of Ravenclaws went by. They paused to look at the four (three of which were still holding Remus by his robes) curiously but didn't seem to have heard what Peter had almost said.

"Gotta be careful Pete! Don't wanna get caught do we?" He said as they passed, causing Peter to go slightly pink in the face.

"Ow…maybe I should go see Madam Pomfrey for this…" Remus muttered as he rubbed his leg.

"Ah Moony, can't it wait till after breakfast? You'll miss it if you go!" James said imploringly.

Remus sighed but continued downstairs for his friend's sake. "_He probably wants us there just in case she still rejects him after this to take the attention away from him._" He thought as they walked in the Hall.

Lily Evans was an unusual person. It seemed the harder James tried to impress and charm her, the more she was almost repulsed by him and yet, when he was down and out she seemed to pity him and…almost sort of care about him. Very strange. She was also an uncommonly kind person to everyone, even Snape! Although no one really knew why she was, considering how popular she is, but that didn't really matter now. As they made their way past the Slytherin table they got the normal treatment. Sneers and angry whispers, which they'd learned to ignore. Severus Snape and his friends, who were almost as dark as he, had this hating thing going for Marauders that was completely mutual. Still, they really had it for James for one reason or another.

The Marauders sat at their usual spot at the end of the Gryffindor table with Peter and Sirius on the outside, Peter next to Remus and Sirius next to James. James looked to the other end of the table where a girl with red hair chatted happily with her friends as they ate.

He sighed as watched her and propped his head against his hand "Beautiful…"

The others knew better then to talk to him by now and went to eating the bountiful breakfast they had in front of them. As Peter reached over Remus for a muffin he caught a glance at his badly bruised arm.

He winced, "Ack…that must really hurt." he said cautiously, not wanting to offend.

Remus shrugged "No one said being a werewolf was gonna be easy." Everyone was talking so loudly and paying no attention to them, they were free to talk a bit more casually.

"Yeah well, me and Sirius almost got this Animagi thing figured. It's tricky, but I reckon with the stuff I've managed to get from old McGonagall we'll get it soon." James said, tearing his eyes away from the redhead for a moment.

Remus smiled gratefully but said nothing. He was very lucky, blessed even, considering his…er, condition. He was able to go to school, had friends who didn't abandon him as soon as they found out what he was. Yes, very blessed, someone up there must like him. Remembering all the times he had to be uprooted from his many homes because neighbors found out about him was pretty humiliating and made him miserable. But here…Hogwarts, he had friends that cared enough to do something illegal for him and by now he knew there was no chance he could talk them out of it. He had friends, (who doubled as family), good health and education at one of the finest wizarding schools around. Yep…it was all he ever wanted.

As breakfast went on it was fairly normal. James squeezed his fork anxiously and kept looking up for the post to come in but said nothing else to anyone about it and barely touched breakfast. Still, everyone took to disregarding his apprehensiveness.

Some people who had already finished eating got up from the table. Among them was a girl with curly brown hair. She smiled brightly at Sirius as she went by, as did a few other girls.

"Boy, I think she fancies you Sirius!" Peter said in awe.

James scoffed, managing to look away from Lily again to mess with Sirius "Of course she does! Who doesn't love the _handsome_ and _charming_ Sirius Black? I know I do!"

Sirius laughed and elbowed him in the arm "Oh but James, what of poor Lily? Surely you won't abandon her for me!"

James retorted which lead to a little play fight. Remus rolled his eyes with a smile and continued eating his cornflakes. After their little 'fight' James went back to looking up for owls and Sirius lend back with a wide yawn. A group of girls passing by stopped whispering for a moment and giggled before going on. Sirius paid them no mind and closed his eyes tiredly.

It was though true. Not in anyone's personal opinion but really more as a general fact. Sirius was a handsome person, with his just above shoulder length dark hair that had it's only natural grace, striking gray eyes and all to perfect skin, not that any of that made a difference because Sirius wasn't the type to be tied down by something as stupid as a relationship. 'They're a waste of time, energy and cause to much drama' he'd said on more then one occasion. Though, every now and again he'd humor a girl by going out with her, but it never lasted more than at the most a few weeks. 'Sirius just isn't up for anything serious' as James said.

Another giggling girl passed. Remus silently wondered how he could stand it all the time, girl giggles tended to get (if not always were) a bit annoying. But he didn't think on the matter for to long because James all but jumped out of his seat when the first owl flew in which made them all look down the table at Lily.

It took a moment but soon another owl landed at her side…and then another…and another. It wasn't long before no less then 10 owls where surrounding her. James smiled at the shock on her face as she pulled letters and things from the owls, which took a bit of food and water before taking off again. Lily looked at all her things and read some of the notes before slowly looking down at James.

She had an…odd, sort of expression. It looked torn between a scowl and a smile. She gathered the things she had and got up from the table. As she passed James, what looked like a ghost of a smile came to her face "Er…thanks…" she murmured and left.

Sirius clapped him on the back as they all watched her leave the hall "Wow, that's the first time she didn't say anything mean to ya mate!"

James grinned and got up "And now, time for phase two."

Peter looked up at him "What's that?"

"Strike while the iron is hot! I'll catch you guys in Transfiguration." he said and set off after Lily.

Peter cast the remaining two a confused look but didn't ask as they returned to eating. Once calm had returned to the hall Peter brought up the subject of Quidditch "Think we'll get the cup this year?" he asked.

Sirius nodded "Without a doubt! I mean, if James manages to get his eyes off Lily long enough to find the snitch next game. Course, he'll have to wait till we're up at least 80 points if we want the cup."

Peter titled his head "Whaddya mean?"

Remus sighed. Quidditch, though interesting to watch, wasn't all that much to talk about or listen to "Well, if that was all we were waiting for, I think I'll go see Madam Pomfrey now. See you in Transfiguration." He said as he got up.

But neither of them seemed to hear him, because Sirius had gotten into explaining how the points worked and Peter was paying to much attention to hear what he said. Throwing his bag over his shoulder (and biting back a pained groan as it hit his back), he hobbled to the hospital wing where Madam Pomfrey was expecting him. It seemed she was one of the few people who truly knew how much damage he could have done to himself.

---

Remus walked into Transfiguration class looking less pale and, as a whole, tons better as he sat at the end of the table. "As it turns out I nearly rip my leg out of its socket. She was surprised I was even able to walk on it!" he informed his friends, while everyone was talking too loud to hear them "And that I cracked a rib or two. Wasn't broken so I just didn't notice it too much, course, it was kind of stinging now that I think about."

"Don't sound too concerned about!" Sirius said jokingly, but James didn't not laugh or even acknowledge it as he might have normally.

It was hard to tell what had happened for he had a strangely thoughtful expression and hadn't said a word since he'd came in. Normally if Lily rejected him they'd be able to tell by his slumped posture and incurable depression or if she hadn't then he'd find everything and anything funny and be smiling nonstop. However, since he did neither now and didn't answer when they asked him about it they weren't sure what had happened.

Remus shrugged "Well, it's better then what I normally do."

The conversation ended at that moment as Professor McGonagall came in. The class went on as usual with nothing out of the ordinary, other then the lack of comments or jokes made by James and Sirius. Sirius just wasn't as good acting alone so he didn't try and James was still too out of it to do much of anything.

"She said she was considering me…." he finally murmured as they came out of the class.

"Oh my god, it lives! Guess you were right Pete, it's no dummy after all." Sirius said in mock shock.

James paid him no mind and went on "She didn't reject me…but she didn't…she wasn't talking straight, like she was telling me some stupid riddle or something! I don't know…this wasn't supposed…I mean…geez…" he continued to hold his confused, if not thoughtful expression.

Remus smiled from behind his Transfiguration book as he checked his answers on their last quiz, "I guess not everything goes as planned."

He nodded absentmindedly "Yeah…"

They continued to Herbology, which also shared the unusual silence from James as he continued to ponder…whatever had happened. Today they were opening a strange almost fruit like plants to get the seeds from within. It was two to a group and what they had to do was one person would use sort of pliers and squeeze the bottom of the plant (but not with to much force), which would make a mouth appear in the plant while the other person reached in and grabbed a hand full of the seeds.

James teamed with Peter while Remus got Sirius ("Better working with you then the living dead over there." He said when Remus asked why he didn't take his usual partner, James) and the greenhouse was filled with screams from the plants as they got to work. It was almost as though James had been placed under a silencing charm until…

"That's it! It's a hint!" James said suddenly, squeezing his pliers so tight that the planet let out a bloodcurdling scream of pain before it blew up and the mess of it went everywhere. That cost Gryffindor 10 points and they had to stay after and clean the mess, but James didn't seem to care, he'd apparently gotten an idea and was now extremely anxious for lunch to come around so he could find Lily.

"You know, if I didn't know better, I'd think he was a bit obsessed." Sirius muttered when he didn't even show for lunch.

Remus chuckled, "Good thing you know better."

Still, Sirius seemed to miss having his usual partner in crime around. Not that he liked James more then Remus and Peter, just when he normally had James around they got detentions or threats of detentions at least twice a day together. Peter and Remus were too far on the safe side to help him wreak some chaos!

---

Classes went on as usual besides the absence of James who didn't turn up for any of them. However, when they did see James again he seemed to almost ready to explode with happiness.

"She's giving me a chance!!!" was the first thing he said when he came up to them.

Peter tried not to look surprised "Really?"

"Yeah! After dinner tonight! She said to meet her in the common room and I was thinking we'd walk around the lake but I don't know is that to cliché? What do you think? Maybe I should take the cloak and we can sneak into Hogsmede…how many people have done that? Think it's a good idea? Come on guys, what should I do?!" he said so quickly Peter almost didn't catch any of it.

"Um…cloak?" Remus said slowly.

James was right about one thing, too many people took their dates for a midnight stroll around the lake, so his best bet would probably be Hogsmede, but why was he asking him? He's never had a girlfriend or even so much as a date.

Sirius grinned and slapped him on the back "Congrats James, you sly dog!"

James nodded, a grin that looked like a mix between happiness and nervousness on his face as they went to their next class. He seemed too anxious to pay much attention and goofed off more than usual.

Finally, the last class before dinner came up, potions.

Normally they spent one quarter of the time threatening if not getting threatened by the Slytherin group, however, James was in far too good a mood to succumb to their taunts today.

They went to their normal table at the back of the class, next to the sort of sink they had to empty the remains of their potions when they were finished making them.

"Good day class! Happy Valentine's day to all!" Professor Ronts said as she came in.

Though Potions took place in one of the dungeons in the castle, it was hard to be upset about it when Professor Ronts was around. She was a pleasant kind of woman who looked to be in about her thirties. About average height, pleasantly plump with midnight black hair that went to her mid-back and a round-ish sort of face that almost always held a pleasant smile. She was a fair teacher, didn't favor any of them. That alone, along with her cheerful demeanor, made it hard to believe she was the Head of Slytherin House. Their old Head of House (Horace Slughorn) had retired at the end of last year, although no one really knew why he had, they'd been given Professor Ronts in his place, seeing as she was also their new potions teacher.

"Well, since today's Valentine's day, I thought we'd do something in the spirit of the occasion! Turn your books to page 245 and read the first few paragraphs." She said, while turning to the chalkboard behind her.

With the wave of her wand the list of ingredients they would need for this potion went up on the board.

"Of course, love potion. How cliché..." Sirius said after speed-reading the book's context.

The Professor smiled "Not just any old love potion Mr. Black! This is only for my advanced classes. It's really difficult, high duty stuff and the antidote is harder, so once you've all made it you are to empty your entire cauldron! No one is to keep ANY of it!" she addressed the entire class at this "So, once you're done reading you may begin, good luck!"

As everyone made a start on their potions, Professor Ronts walked around to check on all their work. James was now in the mood to goof off with Sirius so they didn't spend too much time on their potions. Making funny drawings of the 'Slytherin idiots' and making them into little birds that flew around the class was pretty much all they did for the first half of class.

"Enough, Mr. Potter, Mr. Black! I'd hate to give you detention on such a nice day!" Professor Ronts scolded as she came to their table.

The threat was enough to make James stop and work at once. No way did he want detention today.

She smiled "Ah, very nice Mr. Lupin, you've stirred it to the right shade of purple, now just add the newt head to it and you can place a flask of it on my desk, then empty your cauldron." She said as she passed Remus.

She frowned upon Peter's work "Oh, you forgot to add ¾ of piono Mr. Pettigrew, you must add that and THEN stir in the obinnons. And what's this? The board doesn't say anything about adding frog tongues! (Sigh), well, you best just empty it. I'm sorry to say you'll have to write me a parchment of the importance of reading all the instructions before setting off." She said softly, so not to draw too much attention to him.

That was one of the many things you had to like about her, she was never too pushy and didn't assign much homework if she could help it. No one had ever seen her angry before, it was a very hard thing to do, however, she didn't let them do whatever they wanted; there was always a consequence to any wrongdoing.

As the class came to a close, most stood up to turn in what they'd done and empty their cauldrons. Peter followed sadly behind Remus as they both went to empty their cauldrons after giving a flask of what they'd done.

"Don't feel too bad Peter, you'll get it next time." Remus said in an attempt to make him feel better as they approached their table.

Peter said nothing and stared sadly at his feet as they walked.

And that's, when everything went wrong…

He was so focused on his feet that he walked closer behind Remus as they made their way back to the back. He couldn't see, if only he'd known…he accidentally stepped on the back of Remus' robes, making him fall to the ground and his cauldron went flying out of his hands.

Instead of the loud cracking sound he expected to hear, the sound of his cauldron breaking with the contact of the dungeon floor, there was a loud 'clunk' sort of sound. He looked up and gasped. His cauldron was over Sirius' head, the love potion drenching him all over.

Remus quickly got up and pulled the cauldron of his friend's head "Oh…Sirius, I-I'm really sorry, are you ok?" as he took it off his head, he noticed a slight bump, that was somewhat expected.

"_But if he got even a bit in his mouth…_" His pulse quickened and he shuddered at the very thought, praying that it didn't.

At first Sirius didn't react, he stared at Remus as though he'd never met him, as if he were seeing him for the first time. Remus wasn't sure it that was a good or bad thing.

"Um…Sirius? You ok?" he asked again, slowly.

Sirius slowly nodded "Yeah…"

Remus smiled in relief "Oh…that's good." For a minute he thought the potion…but it didn't; no point in worrying anymore about it. "Here, let me clean that up." He said, waving his wand and the potion lifted from his friend's clothes.

Sirius said no thanks but continued to stare at him. Remus gave him a confused expression but passed it off as nothing and moved to let everyone else empty their cauldrons.

Now, what happened next came as a surprise to everyone, especially Remus.

One minute he was standing up, perfectly fine, the next he was slammed to the ground with enough force to break open a door! But the pain in his head from hitting the floor was nothing compared to the complete shock, even horror, of feeling Sirius' lips crash forcefully into his. Sirius pulled away only to gaze at his face as he said, "I love you."

---

End A/N: Hello! Ok, that's all I got for now, so, whaddya think? Good? Hope so! Review if you liked it/hated it/don't understand it, and I'll be sure to update. Tah!


	2. Chapter 2

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Ho-ly crap…wow, I didn't think people would like it so much…originally, I was gonna post tomorrow, but because you guys seem so interested in it, well, what the heck, you know? I can only hope I'm able to meet up to your guy's standards. I have so far apparently, so I'll try my best to stay in your favor! Thanks for the constructive criticism on the last chapter, I'll work harder on grammar though I'll tell you right now, it's not exactly my strong suit. So without further ado, here's chapter 2! (Heh, that rhymes)

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rolling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it really bothers you or something (although I can't see why it would, I mean, it is called fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts and Professor Sune though, who play minor rolls in this story.)

**Chapter 2**

The entire classroom seemed to echo those three words and Remus was suddenly aware of how very cold the dungeon floor was. It was almost as though time stopped, the only one who kept their movement was Sirius, who only gently brushed some of Remus' hair out of his face.

After a moment he grinned down at him "You're eyes are so beautiful."

Those words destroy the eerie silence and five things happened all at once. 1, Sirius leaned his face close once more to kiss him, which lead to number 2, Remus was now aware of what was gonna happen and started to struggle, begging someone to get Sirius off him, number 3 half the class started chatting what had just happened. 4, James and Peter grabbed Sirius by the arms to get him off and 5, Ronts started yelling of order.

Finally, the noise in the class was so deafening, Ronts screamed "Slumbenous!" and a blast of blue shot out from her wand and hit Sirius in the side. Immediately he stopped all movement and fell forward.

Remus quickly scrambled from beneath his unconscious friend and nearly ran into the wall to get away. His heart hammered painfully in his chest and his brain was racing with thoughts at what had just happened.

The class stared at Sirius in complete shock and silence.

One girl looked horrified at the unconscious Sirius "P-P-Professor…" she started to ask.

"Oh stop! He's just asleep!" Ronts snapped in an unusually angry voice. At first glance you'd be surprised she wasn't in the insane asylum. Her usually neat hair was now sticking up in all directions and her face was so red you'd think she'd squashed tomatoes there as she glared intensely at the spilled potion. However, before anyone could do anything she began pacing and muttering, the red quickly turning to a peak-ish white and anger glossing over with fear.

"No, no, no! This is all wrong; no one was supposed to drink it! Dammit…oh, Dumbledore'll have my head for sure! Xinnion said one more, one more screw up…god, what am I gonna do? I…oooh!" she whimpered and she walked back to her desk.

Remus must have had some nerve, because everyone else thought she'd gone crazy and you NEVER talk to a rambling crazy person. He straightened up once he'd calmed himself down and was able to think straight.

"Um…Professor? You…you _can_ m-make an antidote…right?" he asked timidly.

"Very angry and- what? Oh! Oh of course I can!" she snapped, though her voice sounded angry, it was laced with fear "Oh yes, I can make an antidote…but…"

His eyes widened "But?"

She groaned and raked her hands through her hair "Dumbledore'll have my arse this time! What potions teacher in the right mind doesn't plan these things out?! GRR! I'm such a…(sigh)…I'm sorry Remus, I really am but…the antidote takes at _least_ a month to prepare correctly, anything sooner and it might as well be poison."

"A MONTH?!?" the class echoed, Remus the loudest.

Ronts let out a wail of despair "At the LEAST! Oh, I'm sooo sorry! This is why absolutely NO ONE was supposed to drink it! I made that very clear in all my classes! I told everyone I-I didn't think…oh of COURSE! I DIDN'T THINK! Oh Remus, I'm sorry, so sorry! There's nothing I can do! Xinnion was right, I'm too stupid for this job!" she said into her hands.

Professor Xinnion Sune was their current Defense against the Dark Arts teacher and it was a known fact around the school that he loathed Professor Ronts but for whatever reason no one knew and he was determined to get her out of Hogwarts the moment she stepped in and always found something to criticize her on. Once he'd even sat in on a lesson to see her teach in his free hour. She was so nervous she knocked over half the ingredients for their potions, stuttered horribly, second guessed herself on everything and was overall just a clumsy person.

But none of that mattered right now, the world seemed to spin horribly fast "_A whole month of THAT!?_" Remus thought with a glance at the still sleeping Sirius and could actually get a picture in his head of Sirius suddenly slamming him to the ground again only with a corridor full of people all jeering and laughing.

This mental image did nothing to calm him.

"-Oh I…I know, I'll take him to Poppy, yes, that's it…m-m-maybe she'll have something, she is the nurse after all, yes…" Ronts muttered softly to herself. Forgetting she could use magic she gathered Sirius in her arms (everyone just noticed he'd started to snore) and ran down the corridor to the hospital wing, apparently forgetting she had a class.

No one said anything for a long time; they just stared after Ronts until she became a dot in the hall.

"…Wow, she sure is strong for a girl. OW!" Peter muttered, though the silence in the room made it as though he were yelling and a Slytherin girl from another table threw a book at him.

This would have been funny on any other occasion however; it was not funny in the least as the entire class slowly turned their heads to stare at Remus, as though he'd planned all this. He felt an uncomfortable heat rise to his face and he was all to glad when the sound of other classes going out into the hall signaled the class' dismissal.

---

Remus did not go to dinner that night. As expected, he was called to Dumbledore's office not long after it had happened and didn't show up until much later. Peter and James waited for him in the common room. James, grudgedly, canceled his plans with Lily. As much as he loved her, you gotta be there for your best mate when they're in a sticky situation right? Still, Lily understood perfectly; though James had fallen into a miserable slump of despair.

Peter fidgeted nervously; they hadn't spoken in a while. "I-I hope Sirius and Remus are ok…" he muttered.

James said nothing and continued to stare moodily into the fire. As though the question was some sort of key, the common room door opened and Remus stomped in looking very angry.

Peter swallowed hard "…W-well? What happened?"

Remus threw himself in a chair and sat still for a moment…then he sighed and rubbed his temples "Well, we spent the first 30 minutes talking about why we were there. Found out why Sune hates Ronts. They're brother and sister and according to Sune, Ronts 'stole' his job from him and is a 'blood traitor'. So, for the first 30 minutes it was like family counseling! They didn't even address what happened!"

James blinked "Wow…didn't see that one coming…"

Peter nodded "So…then what?"

Remus scoffed "Nothin'. Even if we ordered the antidote from another place it has to be heated at all times and even if they did that it's not nearly as effective as it would be freshly made! There'd be a 33.3 percent chance he'd be made ill by it a 33.3 chance it work and a 33.3 chance it'd have no effect at all! (Sigh)…Dumbledore said I'll have to wait until Professor Ronts finishes making one from scratch; she started on it right away but…ugh! Now everyone thinks I'm some kind of gay pervert or something…DAMMIT!!" he yelled angrily, throwing a pillow cushion to the ground.

James pulled himself out of his despair to sympathize with his friend "Nothing? But…er, what're they gonna do about Sirius? I mean another thing like today and…" that sentence was better left unfinished.

Remus closed his eyes "I suggested they just keep in the hospital wing and send him homework from there but all the teachers-"

"_All_ the teachers?" his friends repeated in surprise.

He frowned "It was a sort of 'meeting', so they could all be aware of the 'predicament' we have. You know even some of the stupid staff think I did it on purpose! As if it wasn't enough having some of them shirk away from me because of the werewolf thing! Grr…anyway, most of them think it'll be to long and Sirius would fall behind, so they just changed his schedule so he doesn't share any classes with me and he'll just sleep in the hospital wing and have all his food taken there for now."

"So…you didn't, do it on purpose then?" Peter asked timidly.

That was the wrong thing to say.

Remus stood up, a bit of the wolf flashed in his eyes "Did I…YOU WERE THERE!!! IF ANYTHING THIS IS ALL **YOUR** FAULT!!! But to answer you and everyone else in this bloody school, _**NO, I DIDN'T DO IT ON PURPOSE**"_

James frowned "Take it easy Remus; you'll wake up the whole campus!"

"Take it easy!? Oh, that's easy for you to say! You're not going to be the gossip of the whole school! And anyway why are you even here? Weren't you suppose to be fawning over Lily or something?" he snapped bitterly.

James stood up as well, balling his hands into fists "I canceled to see if you were alright, you idiot!"

"Well as you can see I'm great! Absolutely bleedin' perfect!!" he snarled.

Peter looked at both them in fright; they seemed ready to punch each other's teeth out "Oh guys don't fight!"

Remus turned his heated glare at him "Fine, I'm going to bed before anything ELSE can go wrong by Hogwarts biggest, bumbling IDIOT!"

James stepped forward threateningly "Lay off him, you know he didn't do it on purpose! It was an accident and accidents happen!"

Not even bothering to give a reply, Remus stormed angrily up to the dormitory and slammed the door with enough force to shake the walls a bit. James and Peter exchanged looks of agreement and they stayed downstairs.

Remus threw himself angrily on his bed and punched his pillow a few times before pulling it over his face.

_"No way this is happening…" _he thought hopelessly_ "What happened to my blessed life?" _apparently someone up there hated him as well. After a moment guilt took the place of anger.

In retrospect he probably should have calmed himself more, kept a level head about it, instead of snapping at what was probably going to be the only two people in the school who would believe him about this whole mess and try to help him out…they were his friends after all.

"Well it's not like I can be mature ALL the time! I'm still a kid you know…" he murmured angrily.

Even still, his voice of reasoning won in the end.

_"'Hogwarts biggest bumbling idiot'…I think that should be my title…" _he thought miserably, hoping the other two Marauders would forgive him in the morning after that.

It was a long time before the dormitory door opened again and Remus was still unable to go to sleep, though he quickly leveled his breathing to soft sleeping sound. The others silently got into bed and it wasn't long before Peter's snores filled the room.

Remus turned over on his side, wishing he could join them in sleep, but it took a while and even then, he fell into an uneasy, horrible sleep filled with dreams of people jeering and embarrassment beyond recognition.

---

The next morning Remus was the last to wake, somehow feeling more tired then rested; he looked at his two friends who were already dressed but before he could even speak they both went out the door.

Remus cringed at the sound of the door slamming forcefully shut._ "Well, I had that coming…" _he thought dejectedly as he got his clothes.

Both his friends seemed determined to stay angry with him, but by the end of breakfast they were all on talking terms again. It was hard to stay angry once they saw how he was now being treated.

When he came out of the dorm every thing in the common room stopped. Girls glared at him with intense hatred and disbelief while guys just backed away from him as though he were contagious.

He tried his best to ignore them and the constant whispers he heard behind his back. And that was just from his House. As he walked to breakfast, alone, because Peter and James made sure to stay away from him, a Slytherin girl sneered, "Got any more love potion you'd like to throw about?"

"Nah, he only likes pretty **boys**." Her friend said loudly besides her, causing more whispers and a bit of laughter.

Even the ghosts as well as the portraits murmured amongst themselves as he passed, things like 'oh, there's that boy they're all talking about! D'you hear? He poured a love potion all over that Sirius Black kid!'

Peeves, the poltergeist, seemed to really enjoy all this gossip "Well, well! It's Loony Fruity Lupin! I hear that's what they're all calling you now!"

Remus clenched his teeth "Shut up." He said warningly.

But he did not stop, in fact, as he floated over Remus' head he sang, "Loony Loopy Lupin, the strangest kid to boot! At first glance, you'd never guess that he was such a fruit!"

Remus reached in his bag and threw the first thing he could grab (his potions book) at him, but Peeves went aside and blew a raspberry before floating away, cackling madly and sing his new song, adding bits here and there as he went.

Forgetting his book, he marched down to the Great Hall angrily. At once the students stared as he went passed. When he sat the Gryffindor table he was given a large margin of space.

The teachers at the table also seemed to glance at him and say something to one another under their breaths. However, all that wasn't even the worst part. No, the WORST part was when post came.

Remus was shocked to see an owl had come to him with a letter in his beck. He never got mail from home. Curiously, he opened it up as the owl set of and read the note.

Note:_ Remus, this might sound weird but I can't stop thinking about you! Although I don't know why I'm in the hospital wing I hope you come visit, I really, really want to see you…talk to you. If I can I'll try to sneak out of here but Pomfrey's not letting up no matter what I tell her, so, for now I made you a poem to tell you how I feel._

_'Your eyes are like looking into two pools of honey,_

_Your hair is as soft as silk._

_To spend time with you I'd give all my money,_

_So that my sky will always be blue.'_

_Forever and truly yours, written with love,_

_Sirius Black_

Remus read the note 3 times, his face going red with embarrassment.

_"Since when did Sirius write **anything** with love?!" _he thought frantically. At closer look, Sirius had dotted the 'I's in his name with little hearts. He wanted to cover his face in humiliation but before he could more owls arrived.

The flock of owls drew even more attention to him. He quickly got all their letters, each baring a similar message to the one he'd just read and all from Sirius. Fearfully, he pulled out his wand and set all the notes on fire.

_"No one can ever read these!" _he thought hurriedly, not hearing the many gasps and increased volume of voices.

Once they were all ashes the fire stopped and he quickly ran out of the Hall before anyone could stop him, having absolutely nothing for breakfast. That had to be one of the most embarrassing moments of his entire life.

Even when he was out of the Hall, he still kept a quick pace as he went.

Though nobody saw the notes he couldn't help fearing someone might start reciting those corny poems just like they recited Peeve's song.

Still, thinking about it now, he probably should have WAITED to burn the notes. Now there'd be even more to fuel people's gossip! But what else could he do?

It was a spur of the moment thing! But when did he ever do things spur of the moment? Remus was always the voice of reason and logic, he always worked it out before going ahead with something!

This was getting out of hand, he was starting to lose it!

As all these thoughts jumbled themselves in his head, someone tapped him on the back. He turned with his wand ready to hex anyone who'd recite anything but lowered it at who he saw.

Peter held up his book defensively "We uh, we found this one the floor..."

Remus looked away from both Peter and James' sympathetic expressions "…Thanks…" he muttered, taking the book and shoving it carelessly into his bag with all the rest.

For a moment they all stood there in silence, neither looking at each other but rather at the floor.

Then Remus looked up "…Truce?"

James smiled slightly and pulled a muffin from the sleeve of his robe "Well…I think you've suffered enough, that god awful song and all…yeah, truce."

Remus smiled gratefully accepting the muffin and looked to Peter "Truce?"

He smiled back "Truce!"

With a shake of hands, the three set off in much better spirits and Remus not as hungry anymore.

"So! What were all those owls for? Letters from your 'fans'?" James asked jokingly, trying to keep the air light.

"No, all were just from my one admirer…" Remus said darkly.

As they walked to class Remus told them about the notes with cheesy poems.

James raised an eyebrow "'Forever yours, written with love'?"

Remus nodded solemnly.

He shook his head "Hm, if I didn't know about the potion, I'd think he were joking. That's pathetic."

Remus looked at the ground "To be honest James, I think he got the idea from you. Sending all the owls I mean!" he added quickly when James turned with an irritated expression.

Peter nodded "Yeah, I mean, we all saw how Lily acted and then you got a date with her."

James shrugged "Maybe…but come on! He dotted his 'I's with hearts?"

"SHHH!" Remus looked around fearfully "…Yeah. Not so loud. That's why I burned them!"

James shook his head in disbelief "That doesn't sound like Sirius at all…I mean, he'd probably do it to some Slytherin idiot or something like a joke but…"

"Maybe it is a joke." Peter suggested.

Remus frowned "If this is a joke I'll kill him!"

James made a thoughtful face "Well…we can go check him out later, he has to stay in the hospital wing when it's not classes so he can't get you right?"

Remus nodded "Yeah, but I'm not going."

"Course you're not! He'd probably parade you with poems if you did. Me and Peter'll find out for you at lunch." James said with a smile.

They were the first to enter class, there's a first time for everything, but when the rest of the class came it was whispers and glares just as before, but this time, he had friends.

"You want me to hex that loud mouth idiot for you?" James asked when a Slytherin kid went on loudly about the 'Loony Fruity Lupin' song.

Remus sighed and pulled out his book "Just ignore them."

Of course, it was much easier to say this now that his friends were back on his side. The rest of the day was pretty much like that. In every class everyone would whisper and sneer but never say anything to his face.

_"It has to get old sometime, I mean, they can't possible keep it up forever…right?" _he thought to himself.

---

End A/N: Mwah, ha, ha! We shall see about that Remus…ok, so that's all I got now, whaddya think? I know, that song is so stupid, but it was really all I could think of on my own. Sorry! Let me know what you think, thanks!


	3. Chapter 3

**Accidents happen**

A/N: HELLOOOOOO FINLAND! Ok, seriously now. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, I'm glad you're all enjoying the story so far, hope I'm able to keep your interest with this one to! So, without further ado, chapter 3! (not rhyme TT)

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rolling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it really bothers you or something (although I can't see why it would, I mean, it is called fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts and Professor Sune though, who play minor rolls in this story.)

**Chapter 3**

Sirius sighed as he lay back on his hospital bed with his hands behind his head. It was around lunch now and if Madam Pomfrey would let him out they'd probably be serving something delicious in the great Hall like…like shepherd's pie.

"_One of Remus' favorites__…_" He thought with a smile but it slowly faded and he rolled to his side.

Why did all his thoughts lead back to him? Why was his mind so cluttered? No matter what it was it reminded him of Remus…the pattern on the wall looked a lot like the design of one of the shirts he wears.

Sirius groaned and closed his eyes. All these thoughts of him made him want to be with Remus all the more! He'd never felt so restless in all his life! But, he knew better then to try getting out.

Madam Pomfrey took away his wand and only gave it up for classes and the door was charmed so whenever he touched the doorknob Madam Pomfrey would know and force him to stay put.

"_There's not even anything wrong with me! Shouldn't they be saving this room for people who NEED it?!_" he thought bitterly.

"_Like Remus after a full moon. He'd need it…_" a voice in his head said.

The ache in his chest got worse at the thought.

"Remus…why won't you stay out of my head?" he whispered to the ceiling.

Before he could linger on the question however, the door opened.

He scrambled into a sitting position "Remus?" he said with a hopeful smile.

A girl with curly brown hair had walked through the door, though she now frowned as if he'd just insulted her "No."

Sirius' smile fell and he laid back down "Oh."

This happened whenever he got visitors. Mostly they were girls and they all talked to him as though he had some sort of horrible disease or was on his deathbed or something. It was really annoying.

"_Why doesn't he come? This place would be so much more bearable if he were here…what I wouldn't give just…just to talk to him, to see him__ at least_" he thought miserably.

He closed his eyes but it was as if someone had glued a picture of Remus' smiling face to his eyelids. His soft smile…his brilliant earth-ish eyes…his hair that was just barely lined with tiny hints of gray yet somehow adding to his beauty…a smile came to Sirius face.

The girl (now sitting in a chair by his bed) coughed, making him look up "Hm?"

Her frown was replaced by a soft smile, the one that everyone else wore when they came in "How are you feeling?" she asked softly, as though talking to someone Confunded or ill.

Sirius slowly looked at her "…Alright…do I know you?"

"Oh, no…um, my name's Sam. Sam Briken." She said with a big smile.

"Charmed." He said, not looking even remotely 'charmed'.

"Hey, we have the same initials!" she said with a giggle as though it had been rehearsed.

Sirius just nodded and let his mind wander back to Remus. Sam frowned slightly; apparently this wasn't going as she planned. An awkward silence passed before Sam was able to go on.

She smiled sympathetically "I'm sorry they're keeping you cooped here, it's not even your fault! If anything, they should be keeping HIM here! He's the one who started this whole thing!"

Sirius looked slightly interested now; maybe she could tell him why he was being kept here "Him? Him who?"

"Ugh, that horrible Remus Lupin! I mean, well, according to Professor Ronts you can't remember it but that jerk threw a love potion all over you! That's why you're here, but if you ask me, HE'S the one that should be trapped up." She said with pure loathing.

Sirius frowned deeply at her comments but she was obviously too angry with Remus to notice and went on.

"I mean, look at him! Always looking sick anyway, why not keep him up here? And he's got some nerve! I mean, if he wants to be gay that's his business but going after you and forcing you to like him! How low!" she steamed.

Slowly though, a wicked smile came to her face "Hm, but it's no wonder. I mean, like he'd ever have a chance with you on his own. The guy looks he's 50! His hair all gray and what's with his cloths? Ugh, you'd think he could afford something that wasn't used to clean the floors with! Still, that's enough about him, talking about **him** makes me edgy, I mean if you think of it logically, why would you want _**that**_ over all the beautiful girls at this school? Anyway, I came by to-…are you ok?"

For the first time she'd looked up and it was to see Sirius on his feet looking positively livid. A rage such as he'd never felt was now running through his veins and pulsing though his ears as the candles flickered and beds began to shake.

"Take…that…back…" he said through his clenched teeth.

Startled by his tone, she got out of her seat and took a step back "L-look Sirius, you're confused. You don't REALLY like Lupin; it's the potion! I'm trying to help you!"

He took a menacing step forward, causing his bed to quiver as he pushed off it "That's a lie! How I feel is my business and whether I'd prefer Remus to a stuck-up shoddy bitch like you is up to ME!"

She gasped, a hurt look replacing fear "Sirius-"

"I didn't take any damn potion! I feel the way I do on my own! And I don't like Remus! No, I LOVE HIM! **AND IF I EVER HEAR YOU UTTER SO MUCH AS ONE WORD AGAINST HIM I'LL…I'LL…**"

Though he didn't have his wand, the bed-mattress beside him suddenly exploded, sending feathers everywhere.

Sam screamed and put her hands over her head, fearing he might attack her next.

"WHAT IS GOING ON IN HERE?!?" Madam Pomfrey yelled, bursting through the door.

She turned her glare between Sam who was cowering in the corner and Sirius who stood with his fists and teeth clenched tightly, his face red in anger but slowly going down as were the feathers from the bed.

"I…I was just…t-t-trying to tell him a-a-about what happened…" Sam stuttered.

Madam Pomfrey's lips thinned "Ms. Briken, I think you best leave. Black, get back in bed."

"**NO!** You know what, I'VE HAD ENOUGH!!! I'M NOT SICK AND I'M NOT UNDER A POTION SO YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO KEEP ME HERE!!! NOW LET ME OUT OR I'LL BREAK MY WAY OUT!!!" he shouted, to angry to listen to reason.

Madam Pomfrey took out her wand "You'll do no such thing! Now you get back down and if you're finished with your homework then eat your lunch. Ms. Briken, a word if you don't mind."

Sirius glared at the wand and threw himself down on the bed angrily.

Madam Pomfrey pointed her wand at the bed and the feathers stopped falling and seemed to go back into it. She looked pointedly at Sam who followed her out, casting one last wounded look at Sirius as she left…HOWEVER, instead of going out of the hospital wing, they went into Madam Pomfrey's office…leaving the door to the hospital wing, open.

A rush of delight quickly took the place of anger as Sirius got up from the bed…

---

"-And further more, he's under the influence of a potion! He can't think logically and you trying to make him see what happened will only anger and upset him! The potion makes him completely unpredictable and unstable! And the fact that he was _already_ like that before makes it twice as bad. If you wish to visit Mr. Black in the future I suggest you think about his well-being before you do so! Do you understand?" Madam Pomfrey snapped.

Sam wiped her eyes and sniffled "Yes ma'am…"

She nodded curtly "Good. You may go."

As Sam left, Madam Pomfrey walked back to the wing "Ok Black, have you gotten you're (GASP!!!)- Oh my…"

Sirius bed was empty.

---

Remus ate lunch alone, James and Peter had gone off to visit Sirius so he had no choice. Though the whispers and glances at him had shortened a fair few, he could still feel people staring.

"_Well, I didn't expect them to just l__et it go…_" He thought as he ate some shepherd's pie.

"Hey Remus, ah great, we didn't miss lunch!" Peter's voice made him look up.

He smiled as James and Peter sat down "Hey guys."

Peter pulled a plate of potatoes to him and started eating as though he'd been starved a few years while James stared at his food for a moment, as though trying to get over something…

Remus cleared his throat "Sooo…how was Sirius?"

James shook his head "Wow…really wow…Rem, if he's faking it then he's a better actor then I thought!"

Remus frowned "What happened?"

"Well, we didn't actually get to see him because-" he stopped in midsentence.

Both he and Peter stared in slight terror at the other end of the table.

Remus followed their eyes to see that girl with curly brown hair again only this time she was not smiling. She looked completely enraged as she made her way to them, clenching a goblet full to the brim with pumpkin juice in one hand as she came.

Not saying a word to any of them she suddenly thrust all the contents of her goblet in Remus' face then threw the empty goblet at him and stormed out of the Hall. As she left nearly everyone was beside themselves with laughter.

James and Peter stared at Remus for a moment, neither daring to saying a word. Gradually, Remus opened his eyes. He'd been able to close them just in time so he didn't get any juice in them.

"Um…did I do something to deserve that?" he asked slowly.

James sighed, "You might as well have done somethin' to her. See, what I was saying before was that we didn't get to actually see him cuz…well…she, was kinda there first so we decided to waited in the hall for her to leave but…well…she said some…things…really bad things, about you and it…welllll…to say it got Sirius angry would be the biggest understatement of the century."

Remus blinked "Oh?"

He listened in complete shocked as James went into more detail about the event.

"-And after hearing all that, we figured it'd be unwise to go in there without you." James finished.

Peter nodded "Oh yeah! You should've HEARD how angry he was when she said that stuff. I mean, I've seen him mad but…wow, he was really…mad doesn't even cover it!"

"Yeah. If Madam Pomfrey didn't come in when she did I might've gone in, just to be sure he didn't kill the girl!" James muttered.

Remus stared at them in disbelief; he couldn't see any sign that they were joking about this.

"Great…as if I didn't get enough of it. Once she tells, don't look at me like that you know she will! Once she tells everyone in school about that I'll never be able to live this down!" he said miserably.

James and Peter looked at one another, neither knowing what to say.

The silence stretched on a moment before Remus suddenly got up.

He sighed just as miserably and stood up "Well, I better go wash up before class starts; this pumpkin juice really starts to itch when it dries in your hair. See you in bit then."

As he walked passed the Slytherin table a boy stood up and shouted "Hey Lupin! I didn't know you could drink juice through your skin!"

The table roared with laughter for a moment when a red blast suddenly hit the offender and he fell with a yelp of pain.

"POTTER!" a teacher shouted.

But Remus didn't need to stay to know what happened. James hexed the guy with who-knows-what and was getting told off by a teacher. He could already hear what was going on in his head:

A Professor probably marched up angrily.

James would probably try to look defiant or pious 'But Professor, that stupid git-'

'Mr. Potter, you leave punishing the students to the teachers! Someone help (whatever his name was) to Madam Pomfrey and see if she can fix him up. Blank points (depending on the teacher) from Gryffindor' or 'Detention Mr. Potter!' or, if the teacher really detested James 'Blank points AND detention, Mr. Potter!'

Remus smiled slightly, he'd seen it enough times before it was almost surprising how right he was about it. Everybody seemed to be in the Hall eating lunch so he met no one as he headed to the showers.

He took a left at the Gryffindor tower when suddenly a voice said "Remus!"

Remus knew the owner of the voice instantly and turned so quick he nearly fell over "S-Sirius?!"

Before he could register what was happening, Remus found himself in a rib-crushing hug.

"Oh, it seems like ages since I've seen you Rem! I've really want to talk to you." Sirius said happily.

Remus struggled to get out of the hug "Wait- I don't…how'd you get out of the hospital wing?"

Sirius smirked "Oh that! Ha, some stupid prat left the door open! Madam Pomfrey made it so I couldn't touch the doorknob so that was all I need to get out. Why I'm even in there though I don't know. Hey, speaking of, why haven't you come to see me?"

Remus blinked, he asked that almost as he would have normally, in a joking sort of hurt voiced.

"Um…sorry, I was…busy. You know, it is school after all." He said slowly.

Sirius grinned, "Should known. 'All work and no play makes you Remus Lupin', right?" he said with a laugh.

Remus stared at him for a moment, why hadn't they told him? "…Did they find a way to give you the antidote?"

Sirius blinked "What?"

"Er, nothing. So, I take it you're feeling ok then?" Remus asked, trying to conceal the happiness he felt. "_Excellent! With him better everyone'll have nothing to talk about!_" he thought.

Sirius smiled "Couldn't better! In fact, I haven't felt so good in a while and that's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about."

Remus looked confused "Hm?"

Sirius suddenly looked a bit nervous "Well…I mean…I…Remus, can I be honest with you?"

His tone made Remus slowly take a small step back "Um…ok…"

"See, while I was in the hospital wing, I kept thinking about you. Everything I saw lead to you and…well today, some person, Siz or whatever came in and…she said some stuff about you. I swear, I've never felt so angry before. How could anyone say such horrible things about you? And that's when it hit me. All the while I was trapped in the hospital wing I wasn't on edge about being cooped up; I was restive because I couldn't see you. I couldn't talk to you and you weren't around. Rem, I don't think I can take that any longer…" as he spoke he moved closer.

Remus took a step back for the ones he took forward until his back hit the wall "_Trapped!_" He knew what was coming but what he didn't know how to stop it from happening.

Sirius continued, get more nervous by the second "…So, I was…sort of wondering if…maybe…I mean, er…would you like to go out with me?"

A long silence passed between them in which Sirius looked beseechingly at Remus who tried to think of a way out of this.

"Um…uh…I-I…" he glanced around.

The sound of talking and footsteps echoed. Lunch must have ended and now everyone was going to class. By the sound of it they were approaching quickly and this was not a scene Remus wanted to be a part of.

"Um, Sirius, class is about to start, we…we should really go now and-"

"I'm not leaving without an answer. Class isn't half as important to me as you are." Sirius said, grabbing a hold of his arm, not tight enough to hurt him but to keep him where he stood.

Remus looked around desperately, where's a distraction when you need one?!

"Um…I, er- look uh…this all…very sudden. Can I, have some time to think about it? Please?" he added in an attempt to sound heartfelt.

Sirius stared at him for a moment…

The crowed was getting closer…

Sirius seemed to be trying to look understanding but was unable to keep the sorrow out of his gray eyes.

Any minute now they'd all walk into the hall…

Remus closed his eyes, not wanting to see everyone's jeering looks.

"Right…I uh…I understand. Sorry, for keeping you up then…" Sirius said softly, suddenly releasing him.

Remus looked surprised by his tone, he sounded hurt, more wounded then Remus has ever heard him sound before.

"I'll uh…I'll just get going to class then, shall I? Well…I guess I'll be seeing you then…" he said, casting him one more look before sulking away.

He didn't know whether it was out of pity for the pathetic state of his friend or actual consideration but something made Remus say "I didn't say no! Just…let me think about it, ok?"

Sirius looked up, a smile slowly made its way onto his face "Yeah? Uh, I mean, I-I knew that! I mean…right well…you just, let me know later, kay?"

Remus nodded impatiently "Yes, yes. I will."

Grinning and stand much straighter then before, Sirius set off down the hall and just in time to as people began filling the halls to go to their classes.

Remus quickly went up the stairs so he wouldn't get caught in the middle of the stampede. But as he went to class, the seriousness of the situation that had just happened seem to sunk in.

He'd just told Sirius he'd consider going out with, which would mean sooner or later, he'd have to give him an answer!

Inwardly he groaned "_Great…now what?_" he thought miserably.

Frustratedly, he ran a hand through his hair. "Agh! And I didn't even get a chance to get this pumpkin juice out!" he exclaimed suddenly, frightening a passing group of first years.

---

End A/N: Ha, ha, ha! I love that last part! Welp, that's all I've got so far! So, you wonderin' what Remy's gonna do? Hope so cause you'll know next chapter, if you review me, thanks!


	4. Chapter 4

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Kay guys, I'm gonna be honest with ya, I'm not to proud of this chapter. I wish I could just skip this one, but unfortunately it's kinda a big part in the story later on. I see it as a tower of Zinga blocks, if I remove this block (chapter) then the entire tower will fall down and we can't have that. I've fixed it up a bit, but I still don't like it. But, it has to be done in order for the story to stay on track how I want it to. So, hope it's not too bad, here's chapter 4

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rolling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it really bothers you or something (although I can't see why it would, I mean, it is called fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam; each playing minor rolls in this story.)

**Chapter 4**

A few days had passed since Sirius had escaped from the hospital wing and other then mysterious absences of Remus outside of class, live was about as normal as it can get at Hogwarts. (I mean, you know, aside from all the magic and stuff.)

Peter and James sat in the common room playing Exploding Snap when Peter sighed.

"I wonder where Remus has been…" he muttered.

James shrugged "He'll show up eventually."

Suddenly the common room burst open and Remus rushed in.

"James, you have the cloak with you!" he more demanded then asked.

James blinked "Um, yeah, when don't I…" he said, pulling it from his bag besides the table.

Not even waiting for him to take it out all the way, Remus yanked it from his hands and threw it over himself, disappearing from sight. Before James could protest, the reason why he was acting so strangely burst through the door.

"Remus?!" Sirius shouted, looking around the common room.

He spotted James and Peter and rushed over "Hey guys, have you seen Remus?"

Both glanced at the spot Remus had once been (or possibly still was, they couldn't tell) then at each other, then back at Sirius "No."

Sirius groaned and fell back on the couch, putting his face dejectedly in his hands.

James was surprised by the unusual behavior "Is er…there anything we can do to…you know, help?"

Sirius sighed "No…not unless you can make him say yes but even if you could I wouldn't want you to…wow, you know James, I always used to make fun of you about Lily but now I see how you feel."

James went slightly red "I wouldn't go as far as to say that…"

'_Because my feelings are real not some love induced by a potion…_' he added in his mind.

"No you're right, I think I'm worse. I don't get it! He said he'd think about it and tell me his answer. I could've sworn I saw him running up here and now…(sigh), if he rejects me I…I don't know what I'm gonna do…I mean, I think I'll die…" Sirius murmured.

James nearly gagged, at least with Lily he managed to impress her while still having a bit of decency and self-respect!

"Yes? Yes to what?" Peter asked naively.

Sirius smiled sadly "Isn't it obvious? I asked Remus to go out with me."

There was a loud, almost explosion as the marbles to their game hit the floor, which made a few people look at them.

"Er, sorry." James muttered picking up the marbles.

Slowly, everyone went back to whatever they were doing and paid them no attention. James knew that's what they were talking about, but to actually hear it from Sirius' own mouth was…all together shocking, if not somewhat disturbing.

"Well…maybe he's playing hard to get." Peter said slowly, trying to be of some help.

Sirius sighed "Yeah…or maybe…what if he doesn't like me? What if he hates me? Oh guys, I couldn't bear it if he hates me! I mean, it makes sense right? He didn't visit me in the hospital wing and now he's avoiding me! James, what should I do?"

"Um…uh, why don't you…uh…are you sure he's avoiding you?" he asked slowly, the complete despair in his friend's voice was almost frightening.

Sirius frowned "Oh I'm sure. He saw me and ran for it. I've never seen him move so fast! He couldn't have run faster if I'd been firing silver bullets at him! He hates me doesn't he?"

James put his hands up defensively "No, no! I mean…maybe you just thought you saw him! I mean, did you check everywhere he might be?"

"Oh, let's see. I checked the library, on the grounds, by the lake, near the Hall, empty rooms, hospital wing, EVERYWHERE!" Sirius said, ticking them off with his fingers.

"What about the Owlery?" Peter said.

Sirius gave him a look "Why would he be there? He never writes home!"

"You never know." James said.

Sirius stared at them for a moment, then nodded and turned back and went out the portrait hole. As soon as he was gone Remus appeared from nowhere, pulling the cloak off.

"Whew…now that one was a close one." he muttered, handing James his cloak back.

James nodded "Yeah…well Pete, now we know where he's been off to all the time."

Remus shook his head "I don't know what else to do! I mean, I can't say no, you saw how he is about it! 'He'll die'…but if I say yes then this'll haunt me the rest of my life!"

"Oh you're exaggerating! It probably won't be all your life, just as long as you stay in Hogwarts! Or, you know, if you live around people who _knew_ you in Hogwarts. You'd just have to make sure never to be in contact with anyone who knew you now…oh but what if they tell their friends? Scratch that, you'll just have to leave the country, I'm sure that'd work." Peter said bracingly.

Both James and Remus stared at him for a moment at a loss for words.

"…Yeah Pete, not that that doesn't help but, I think I should handle this." James said then turned back to Remus "Rem, you can't just keep running away from him though! I mean, if you do that's like you've already said no!"

"Well Lily did it to you and you never took it as a no!" Remus snapped. This whole mess was putting him on edge, but even through the stress he could tell that was the wrong thing to say.

Before he could lose James' friendship (something he _really_ needed at the moment) again he apologized "I'm sorry, sorry! I just…ugh, I feel trapped! It's like a constant full moon, I can't escape it!"

James huffed but was willing to overlook that insult in the need of his friend "Well, why not just…you know, go along with it?"

Remus looked at him "What do you mean?"

However, as soon as James was about to answer him the portrait hole opened again and who do you think it was?

"He's not in the Owlery James; I caught Michel on his way back from it and- Remus?"

For some reason the sound around them all was getting quieter…

Remus stiffened and didn't dare turn around but could hear Sirius' fast approach to him from behind. "Remus, I've been looking all over for you! Where've you been?" Sirius said, turning him around to face him.

"Uhh…I-I…um…in…er…Hagrid's! Yea, that's it, er, I was asking him about…the…um, job as gamekeeper and…stuff…" Remus said slowly, trying to hide the guilty look that threatened to show on his face.

But Sirius didn't seem to question the story he'd come with, in fact, a look of relief washed over his face. "Oh…well, that's good to hear…I mean, you know, not that it matters or anything, I knew you were ok and stuff…"

It got quiet for a loooooong time.

Finally, Sirius cleared his throat "S-so…um…have you, made up your mind?"

Remus' voice hitched and he looked helplessly at James who could only shrug, unable to help him. The whole room was now paying attention and seemed to hold its breath as well.

Sirius stared at him hopefully and swallowed hard.

"Um…um…l-look! Someone just got the new Swiftsweep broom (Latest broom out)!" he said suddenly.

As he expected, EVERYONE turned to where he'd pointed and he grabbed James' cloak before Sirius could look back.

"Remus?" he looked around, but before he could do anything the common room door closed, as if someone had just left.

Sirius stared at the door for a moment before quickly running out it "Remus wait!"

Once he'd left, the noise of the common room picked up again with noise. "Can you BELIEVE him? He goes through all that trouble to poison Sirius and doesn't even reap the reward of it!" a girl whispered angrily to her friend.

James frowned, but before he could shout a rude comment back to the loudmouth girl, a hand gripped his arm. Peter yelped in surprise as he felt something grabbed him to.

"Shh! It's me! Come on." Remus' voice hissed.

Both were sort of pulled back to their dormitory and once inside, the door locked and Remus took off the cloak again.

"See what I mean?! I got lucky this time but for how long?" he all but shouted in frustration, pulling his hair.

James sighed, "Remus relax. Look, there's a way out of this. Just tell Sirius everything he wants to hear and- hear me out!" he said this quickly for Remus showed all intention of interrupting. "-…And get it over with. I mean, it can't be any worse then everyone thinking you're a finicky flirt, right?"

Remus looked about to shout but stopped himself. People may get suspicious if they heard him yelling from upstairs when he'd supposedly left.

He took a deep breath and said as calmly as he could "…James, you say that so easily but if you were in my shoes would you honestly pretend to be in love with your best mate when he doesn't think it's pretend? That's…that's cruel! I'd be playing with his heart!"

"Well what else can you do? I mean if worse were to come to pass just tell him you're waiting for a commitment. We all know how Sirius is about relationships so if you say the 'C' word, he'll drop you in a minute! Besides, you're killing him by avoiding him. I've never seen him so…"

"Pathetic?" Peter squeaked.

James glanced at him "…For lack of better word, yes. Pathetic. Rem, you're making him make a fool out of himself! Imagine what'll be like once he's better and he's dug this huge hole for himself! So just…pretend! I mean, the potion practically makes you in charge of him! If you don't want him to do anything then make rules and if he's suppose to love you then he wouldn't dare break them! Come on, it's just for a while."

Remus frowned "Those are some pretty big 'if's James. What if you're wrong? No I…I can't…I mean, he can't really be so obsessed."

James shook his head "You didn't hear him raging on about you! I'm tellin' ya, the man's near insane! If you keep denying him I wouldn't be surprised if he did something drastic like…like…"

"Like announce his undying love for you in front of the entire school!" Peter piped up.

James slapped his forehead; he didn't have to say that, and looked up to see the color drained from Remus' face.

"Entire…school?" he whimpered.

This decision would have to take more thought then he first thought…but either way, he felt doomed.

---

"No way…that kid on the right?"

"No left, next to James Potter."

"Him? But…why?"

"I heard he's really smart, it was only a matter of time before he tried something."

"But he always seemed straight to me."

"Yeah well, Severus Snape's always trying to tell everyone there was something weird about that Lupin kid, just never thought it was this and what's worse, I hear Black was his friend when he did it!"

"No!"

"Yeah! I'm surprise James and that other one aren't ducking for cover after what happened to Black!"

"I always thought there was something strange about that Remus Lupin…"

"Yeah, I hear he carries that special love potion with him everywhere, just in case."

"And did you know that now that he has Sirius in his hands he doesn't even want him?"

"OH! How awful!"

"I guess he just liked the thrill of not having him, now that he has him he doesn't want him…"

"Geez, how fickle!"

"Yeah, Black's been a wreck ever since it, poor guy."

The usual whispers were now increased with the new information about what had happened in the Gryffindor common room. Remus' reputation had hit rock bottom. The other houses seemed to despise him more then the entire Slytherin house!

"And here I thought it couldn't get any worse…" he mumbled.

Even first years seemed to know what was going on as a few of them cast disapproving looks at Remus as they passed.

"Wow, that's gotta be an all time low." James said, shaking his head.

Remus glanced at him but said nothing about it and hung his head "It makes me wonder…what'd I do to deserve this?"

It was a question they all wondered. Still, it went unanswered as they went on about the day and even Peeves had come up with another song, the gossip was making him beside himself with glee.

"_That Remus Lupin's been quite fickle, his soul as sour as a pickle! To hard to please, even on bended knees, as Black found out for now he twiddles!_" he'd sing, popping up at random moments.

It was hard to tell who was suffering worse, Remus or Sirius. Remus, now being the 'tramp' of the school while Sirius felt as though his heart were being run over again and again and nothing anyone said made him feel better.

However, one day, it went to a whole new level.

Remus, who was very grumpy these days, was matching off to dinner with James and Peter diffidently at his side. After the last class, potions, in which everyone's glares and Prof. Ronts constant apologies followed him everywhere, he just wanted to be alone.

That thought seemed to be asking too much from anyone, for as they came out of the dungeon, they ran into a group of Slytherins who were also going off to dinner.

The gang smirked at the sight of Remus "Hey there lover-boy, you throw anymore love potion lately?"

Remus' shoulders tensed at their laughter but he did not turn around.

"Careful Harold, you might be next for that!" another boy howled.

James turned around and pointed his wand at the group "Gee, that's real witty, you must have some brain, you wanna see what it looks like? Keep it up and it'll be on the floor!"

Peter glanced around, Sirius would normally say something to make James' comment better at this point but he seeing as he wasn't around (they'd gone to taking turns being with Remus and Sirius at different times to keep from conflict)…

"Y-yeah! But James, I don't think human eyes can see things that small!" he said with a slightly nervous smirk.

James laughed and patted his back "Good one S- Peter!"

"Aw, what's a matter? The little fruit can't fight his own battles?" the first one taunted.

"No, he'll break a nail!"

The Slytherins roared with laughter.

James stepped forward angrily "Hinned I'm warning you…"

"Hey Srige, you think he might go after you, with you beautiful eyes?"

"Nah, his only got one love and Sirius Black sure is 'lucky' for it!"

It was as they laughed that something suddenly snapped inside Remus' head. His eyes widened and his pupils all but disappeared. Before James could so much as utter a curse Remus spun back around and punched the close Slytherin guy to him.

Everyone stared in shock as the boy hit the ground.

Remus glared with such hatred the wolf in him showed on his human face more then James or Peter had ever seen it "NOW LETS GET ONE THING STRAIGHT YOU BASTARD,"

By now tons of people had crowed around to watch, Remus who seldom cussed had caught every ones attention with that one word. Everyone crowed around the corridor, including one person in particular…

"_**I DO NOT LOVE SIRIUS BLACK!!!!**_" He screamed so loudly it wouldn't be at all surprising if Hagrid had heard him from his hut!

A long silence followed this in which the only sound was Remus' heavy breathing. Even Peter and James were surprised by the sudden outburst and stared at him in alarm.

James glanced around and gasped "Um…R-Remus?"

"WHAT?!" he all but snarled, turning to him.

But he didn't need to ask what because as soon as he turned he saw what. The crowd had parted slightly to show Sirius who stared at him with an unreadable expression on his face.

His mouth went dry and for a moment no one said anything as they held their gaze. Sirius' stormy gray eyes were filled with so much hurt it was hard to believe he wasn't breaking down.

Sirius broke the connection by looking away "I uh…heh, I guess I should've known huh? I mean…"

"Sirius-"

He shook his head "No, Remus. It's fine. I…I guess it just flew over my head. It was so obvious I just…I wish it weren't. Well…bye then…" he hid his pain fairly well, his voice was steady and he even managed a small smile as he turned. But never, in all his life, would Remus forget the pain he saw etched in those big, gray eyes.

The crowed around him began to murmur amongst themselves, but he was deaf to them.

"_What've I done…?_" he thought.

He glanced at James who nodded and he ran after him "Sirius wait!" he turned the same corner but he was long gone.

After he'd walked away calmly he obviously ran.

He put his hand around his mouth and shouted "SIRIUS! SIRIUS WHERE ARE YOU!? COME BACK! I…I didn't mean…(sigh)…I'm sorry…" he looked down sadly.

'_You stupid idiot!__ Why the hell did you say something like!?_' a voice yelled angrily in his head.

"I…I didn't mean it though I just…I got angry and…" he trailed off.

He mentally beat himself as he walked down the corridor, not really caring where his feet were taking him. In fact, he might have just kept on walking all night if a voice didn't penetrate his movements.

"Remus Lupin, stop right there!" an adult voice shouted.

He stopped and turned to see Prof. Ronts, out of breath and running up behind him. She frowned as she approached "There you are, I've been looking everywhere for you!"

"Professor I-"

"Do you even know what you've done?" she said suddenly.

He blinked "Um, if it's about punching that Slytherin-"

"No, no, no, it has nothing to do with that idiot; I'm talking about in the hallway, what you said! I tried calling you back after you did but you just ran off! Honestly, do you KNOW what you've done?!" she snapped.

Remus was in complete surprise. First, she'd just called not only a student, but a student of her own HOUSE, an idiot! The tone she was using as she spoke was also unusual for her.

"Um…er, I guess…I'm sorry, I was just angry with all the gossip and stuff that people have been saying. I went to apologize to him but I can't find him." He said slowly.

Ronts frowned "Well you better hope you find him! Remus, did you read the effects of the potion?"

He shook his head, earning a frustrated groan from the professor.

"UGH! Out of all my students I'd had hoped YOU'D read it thoroughly enough to get it! The potion is really dangerous because it makes whoever takes it completely unstable! His mind is not his own! And with what you just said, there's no TELLING what he'll do! Listen, he doesn't KNOW he's under the influence of a potion, and it's a foolish thing to try telling him that, it'll make him go ballistic and now that you've rejected him…well, I can only hope we find him before something bad happens…" she said quickly.

And just as she'd finished speaking they both heard a yell:

"REMUS! REEEEMUS!! Where are you…**REMUS!!!**"

Ronts frowned "That sounded like Pettigrew, come on!"

They both ran to the source of the voice and saw Peter about half of a corridor away, looking around frantically. He smiled and ran to them, panting as he did "Rem! James said…Sirius…in Ronts room!"

Prof. Ronts frowned "Slow down Peter, what? Sirius is in my room?"

He nodded "And…poison!"

Remus' eyes widened "Poison?!"

Ronts frowned "We've got to go to my room, come on!" and all three of them ran as fast as they could down the stairs, taking a few of the short cuts to the dungeon where the door was open.

And in the room, James was close to the door and all the way in the back of the room was Sirius, who held three wands in one hand, and a vile with a strange potion in the other, lifted close to his face.

Ronts gasped "Mininstol!"

Peter looked confused "What?"

"Poison." Remus breathed.

James inched a little closer to him, wandless now "Look Sirius, just…put it down, ok? Y-you don't want to-"

"Yes I do. Remus hates me…so what's the point of anything any more?" Sirius said in the most serious voice he'd ever heard him use. Tearstains were on his cheeks but his voice didn't quiver as he spoke.

James looked back at the rest of them, Ronts mostly "He's got your wand to, found it on the desk."

Ronts cursed under her breath "Dammit! When will I stop messing up?!" she muttered angrily at herself.

"What're we gonna do? That's real poison he's got there!" Peter whimpered.

Ronts sighed and turned to Remus "It's up to you."

Remus frowned "What?"

"You're the only one who can talk him out it! Take it back, take back everything you said! Go out with him, marry him, ANYTHING! Just do _something_ or else he'll kill himself!" Ronts whispered, though Sirius still didn't seem aware of their presence.

Remus' eyes widened "M-marry?!"

Ronts frowned "You know what I mean! Just get in there!" and as she said this she pushed him in front of James and still, Sirius didn't seem to see him there.

He looked back at them, only to be motioned forward.

Remus took a deep breath and slowly walked forward "…Sirius…" He said slowly.

It took a moment, as if he didn't hear him at first, but then, he looked up, his eyes still holding that torrid pain of in the hall, which made Remus' insides twist up with guilt.

"…Please, go away…you've said all I need to hear and…and I think that's all that needs to be said about it." He whispered.

Remus shook his head "No, Sirius you don't understand-"

Sirius frowned "Actually I think I do! I understand everything now but I wish I didn't! So…now if you don't mind…" He pulled the cork of the container and pulled it to his lips.

The three at the sidelines gasped.

Remus' eyes widened "_Oh my god…he's really gonna do it!_" he thought.

"Stop!" Remus yelled, knocking the potion from his hands.

It fell to the ground with a crash and ate away at the bottom of the floor. Peter winced at the sight, imagining it working away at the insides of a human…it looked painful.

Remus bent to his eye level, grabbed his shoulders and forced him to look him in the eye "Sirius I didn't mean it, I swear! I just got mad and I wasn't thinking! I was stupid to say anything so horrible about you and I'm sorry!" though he may not _love him_, love him, Sirius was still his friend and he didn't want his death hanging over his head.

Sirius looked up at him and his eyes got sort of misty "But…you…you didn't answer, you didn't visit…you don't…love me…" as the last four words left his mouth a few tears fell.

Remus looked back at the group.

James and Ronts just nodded.

He sighed, "_I know…dammit…_" he thought resentfully.

"Sirius," Remus said, his tone making him look up. "That's a lie. I'm answering you now and I mean it when I say, I'd be honored to go out with you."

Sirius wiped his eyes "R-really?"

Remus nodded "Of course. The two of us, we'll be the envy of the entire school." He said jokingly.

Sirius chuckled softly, making Remus smile.

For a moment silence met them.

Then, Sirius looked back at him "So…you do? I mean, really, you do?"

Remus closed his eyes '_Just say it!_' his conscious shouted.

He opened his eyes and smiled warmly as he hugged him "Yes I…(sigh)…I…love, you to…"

---

End A/N: HA! Finally! Ok, now I've got a few things to say. One, I know what you're thinking 'Angry outburst by Remus? That's OOC'. Well, when you think about the situation he's in, is it really? I mean, how would you feel if everyone was talkin' about you up to your face and behind your back about something that wasn't even your fault. Wouldn't you get angry? And if you were keeping those emotions pent up inside all the time, wouldn't you be bound to explode? I'm thinking more logically about it, you know?  
Sorry if you didn't like that, but hey, in all honesty, I didn't really like this chapter either. I dunno why, but I just, I never like this chapter (when I'm proof-reading it). But, luckily, this is not were the story ends! Wanna know the rocky road to relationships? Then continue reading and don't forget to review! See ya!


	5. Chapter 5

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! I hope there are still people out there reading and whoever's around, thanks! If you liked the last chapter I'm glad you stuck around! So without further ado, chapter 5!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rolling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it really bothers you or something (although I can't see why it would, I mean, it is called fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam Briken.)

**Chapter 5**

Hogwarts seemed to explode with gossip about what happened. Though no one was there besides the four Marauders and Professor Ronts, everyone seemed to know what happened, although, they all had their little twists.

"I heard they got in this loud argument about the potion and Remus made him drink the poison!"

"I heard that the poison was so fast working he nearly died!"

"I heard they had to send him to St. Mungo's to recover and he got back by riding a hippogriff!"

A teacher matched angrily to the group of girls at the breakfast table "And I heard that you girls talk too much! Back to work, this is school not a sewing circle!"

James sniggered when he heard some of the stuff that was going around "It always amazes me how the truth gets so distorted when it's told again and again."

Remus frowned "Yes, but I'd find it funnier if it weren't about me. So, should we sneak into the kitchen then?"

James had gone downstairs first to see how everyone was reacting to what happened yesterday. You know, just to make sure it'd be safe to go downstairs.

He shrugged "I dunno. It could go two ways. Either you go down and get ridiculed for that OR you don't go down and people think you and Sirius are doing…well you know." He made a gesture with his hands.

Remus' face went red so fast he didn't cover it fast enough with his pillow "Is that really what they'll think?!"

James shrugged "Well, I could be exaggerating. Hard to tell with that lot; bet the Slytherin idiots 'll have a field day with this."

"Well, they should at least get their facts straight! For one, Sirius has to stay in the hospital wing so that's NOT gonna happen! And second, I'm making some rules. I can only hope your 'if's are right James…"

James grinned "Yeah. Don't worry! Lils knows all about potions and she said-"

"You got your 'ifs' from Lily?" Remus asked in surprise.

James went slightly pink "Well…you're not the only one getting asked out you know. During your little drama with Sirius I've kinda been getting closer to Miss Evans. I had to apologize for ditching her last time and…well, you know. And anyways she likes you guys to so she's willing to help out however she can…"

Remus smiled "Ah, so she's finally stopped calling you a bighead Potter?"

James put on a face of mock anger "As a matter of fact she has! So there!"

They laughed for a moment then the room got quiet.

"Still, I think you'd be better of eating breakfast in the hospital wing. I mean, you can't do anything there **and** you'll be able see Sirius and trust me, after what happened yesterday he'll probably want you to confirm it, you know?" James said slowly.

Remus sighed and got up "Yeah, I know. All this pretending, you'd think we were little kids. Well, see you James."

James nodded "Bye."

It was fairly early so there weren't too many people in the common room right now, which was perfect in Remus' opinion. He managed to get downstairs without meeting a single soul and made it to the hospital wing in one piece.

"Good morning Madam Pomfrey." He said as he came up.

She looked at him with an odd sort of expression and spoke rather slowly "Mornin' Lupin. Um, I was just…wondering…I mean, I heard some…things, on my way to the greenhouse this morning. Getting some new herbs for my medicine cabinet you know and uh, well…I was wondering if-"

He sighed, "Some of it's true, some not. He asked me out and almost poisoned himself because I didn't say yes so I said yes so he wouldn't kill himself but it's all pretend, once he gets better that's that." he said somewhat annoyed.

She gave a sort of smile "Ah. Well…that answers that then. All right, you can go in. He's been anxious to see you all morning."

Remus nodded "Thanks." He'd actually been expecting teachers to ask so he went over it in his head a few times and knew exactly what he'd tell them.

But more importantly was the moment at hand. He peeked cautiously into the room and spotted Sirius on his bed with both hands behind his head, staring dreamily at the ceiling above.

He took a deep breath then slowly let it out "_Well…now's a good a time as any…_" he thought and slowly walked in the room.

At first Sirius didn't seem to notice, so he cleared his throat.

Still no response.

"Er…Sirius?" he said slowly, and much quieter then he'd originally intended.

He bolted upright "Remus!" a wide smile came to his mouth as he got up from his bed and put his arms around him in a great hug "So, it wasn't all a dream then? I mean, you do love me, right?" he asked, almost in a fearful tone.

Inside Remus' head, he was a bit shocked with how Sirius sounded.

"_Peter wasn't kidding when he said 'Pathetic'._" Remus thought in the back of his mind.

But outside, he smiled and patted his back "Course it wasn't. I'm here aren't I?"

Sirius pulled back to look at him "Yes…you are here, with me…"

For a moment they stayed like that in silence. Sirius with his arms around Remus but pulled away slightly to see his face. In fact, the kiss was so sudden Remus nearly toppled over with the force of it.

Remus froze in the spot. If he moved away would Sirius get suicidal on him again? Even if he wouldn't, it was as though someone had melted his shoes to the spot and he couldn't move…

The only reason Sirius pulled away was because there was a crash that made them both look at the doorway.

In the door stood Sam Briken and she stood there with a look of complete alarm. Apparently she'd brought some get-well thing that was now in ruins on the floor.

Time seemed to stop as the three stared at one another. Sam looked at Sirius then at Remus then back at Sirius. Her hurt expression quickly changed to rage as glared at Remus then stomped out of the room.

"_Oh great, now I've got an enemy…_" Remus thought horribly as she left.

Luckily though, Sam's disturbance was apparently just the thing that was needed to get whatever had glued Remus' shoes off and mobility was returned to him.

He got out of Sirius embrace and out of arms-reach "Wait a second. See, this is _exactly_ why I came. Now, this has nothing to do with you but…I think we should make some ground-rules." He said slowly.

Sirius sat back on his bed looking confused "Rules?"

"Yes. Like I said it's not you it's…er, for…my…religion! Yeah, yeah that's it. There are just some things I can't permit, you know, because of my religion." He went, trying to come up with something believable.

Sirius slowly smiled "I didn't know you were religious. So what are you then?"

"Er, that's not important!" Remus said, perhaps a little too quickly because Sirius raised an eyebrow.

He cleared his throat "Anyways! Um, rule number one, none of that ever again. You know, snogging and stuff in public. In fact no public signs of affection at all and you can't just do that out of the blue; you really need to give me some kind of warning!"

"_So I can run away._" He added in his mind.

Sirius nodded "Right."

"Good. Numbers two, please, please, please, please, _please_ **don't** mention me in conversations, if you can help it. I mean if they ask how the…relationship (he nearly gagged at the word) is working out, don't answer. Or if they ask what you think of me, _**definitely**_ don't answer."

Again, Sirius nodded "Kay."

Remus smiled, this was going much better then he'd thought it would "And finally. Rule number three, the MOST important rule…no…ugh, how do I say this…" with every word he spoke he could feel his face getting heated "No…you know…"

Sirius once more gave him a confused look as he bit his lip and looked anywhere but in his direction, leaning on the tips of his toes. "_This is so embarrassing!_" he thought furiously, clenching his fists.

"Remus-"

"Just no sex or anything like that, ok?" he said so quickly it almost didn't make sense and somehow his face went a deeper shade of red. Slowly he looked up and to his surprise, Sirius was smiling.

"Ohhh, I see. 'Religious' huh? Heh, ah don't worry about it. I knew you were the classy type, one of the reasons I love you. Don't worry, I understand. You want commitment and I understand that. No sex till there's a ring on that finger; I know how it goes. Well, is that all?" he asked, almost cheerfully.

Remus blinked "Um…yeah I guess…"

Sirius grinned and jumped off his bed "Great! Those are some good rules and I know why you made 'em BUT…I'll only follow them on one condition."

Remus stared at him for a moment "_Does he really think he's in any position to ask conditions?_" he thought.

Sirius smiled as though reading his mind "Don't worry, it's nothing huge or anything, and I'm not gonna make my own rules. It's just one thing…get me out of here!"

Remus blinked "What?"

Sirius sighed, "I don't belong in the hospital wing. It's SOOO boring! The only people I see all day is Madam Pomfrey and those stupid girls who act as though I'm dying or something! I only get out for classes and…please, I'm not sick and I don't need this crap. Think you can ask 'em to let me out? I'm sure that if _you_ asked they'd listen."

Remus felt a quick surge of pity and guilt. It was his fault that he was even up here to begin with and Sirius did look miserable. Maybe if he hadn't been trapped in here he wouldn't have been so…restless?

"…Um…well, I can talk to Madam Pomfrey…you mean it? I mean, if I get you out you'll follow all the rules?" he asked slowly.

Sirius grinned and held up his right hand, "I swear by all the chocolates in Honeydukes!"

Remus nodded because in all honesty, it was number three that really kept him in here. He and all the teachers at least made that agreement known. With the potion, there was no telling…but if he promised…

He sighed, "Well…I'll talk to her. But for now, let's eat."

On the tray by Sirius' bed were a few plates that had eggs, bacon and pancakes and two goblets with orange juice. As they ate it was actually fairly normal, the only real thing was spontaneous hugs and kisses on the cheek, which made Remus blush slightly and Sirius laugh.

Once they'd eaten their fill the plates magically cleared.

"Well, we should probably start off to classes then. D'you know they changed my schedule around? I don't have you, James or Peter in any of my classes." Sirius said casually as they got up.

Another pang of guilt hit Remus in the chest; that was his suggestion as well.

"Er, why don't you go off without me, I'll talk to Madam Pomfrey now and catch up with you later. Kay?" he said quickly to cover up for his pause.

Sirius grinned "Alright, let me just get my wand from her." Once he had he came back and pulled his bag from under his bed, walked up to Remus and kissed him lightly on the cheek "Thanks, see ya later!" and ran off.

Remus stared after him for a minute, a strange sort of expression on his face…but then he shook his head and wiped his cheek then walked into Madam Pomfrey's office "Er, excuse me…"

She looked up "Oh, hello Remus. What can I do for you?"

He sighed "You know how I told you that I'd pretend to go out with Sirius so he wouldn't kill himself until the antidote's ready? Well, I just made rules about that with him and he said he'd only follow them if…if I could get him out of here."

Madam Pomfrey stared at him for a moment "Rules? What sorts of rules?"

"Well, you know…he won't do what we all feared he would for one…" he muttered this and felt his face heat up once more.

Madam Pomfrey nodded, turning a bit pink herself "Oh yes of course! Hm…I don't know, are you sure he'll follow it? God forbid that potion…er…dictates his, actions…" her voice trailed off feebly.

Remus nodded "I'm sure. I read this book on the potion (just to be prepared) and according to the book, the potion forms more an obsession rather then love, because you can't really construct love, so, the way I figure it is, he wouldn't want to loss his obsession (me) by not following what it (me) says. Right?"

Madam Pomfrey still looked doubting but sighed "We did all this for your sake so, if you think it'd be ok to let him back into Gryffindor tower there's not much I can say about it. It's your choice."

"Yeah, I know…" he said, turning to leave.

"_I just hope I made the right one…_"

---

James snorted into the pudding he was eating "'Ring on your finger?!'"

They were now at lunch and Remus was telling James and Peter what had happened earlier that morning. Remus kicked him under the table "Will you lower your voice?! I'm telling you guys, not the whole school!"

James nodded and tried to control his sniggering "Sorry, I'm sorry…go on."

He sighed "Anyways, he said he'd only follow the rules if I got him out of the hospital wing. Well, I told Madam Pomfrey what we agreed on and she told me it was my choice."

"So you're letting him out?" Peter asked.

Remus sighed, "Well what else could I do? I mean, it's not like he's done anything wrong to deserve being in there! He feels like a prisoner! And as long as he follows number three then I have no problem with him in the dorms with us."

James nodded and grabbed a goblet of pumpkin juice "Yeah…heh, heh, 'ring on your finger', you gotta admit, that's pretty funny!"

Remus frowned "It is **not**! Honestly, it sounds as though he wants to get married or something!"

Peter dropped his plate and James nearly choked on his juice…a dead silence followed those last words as the boys looked at one another with white faces…it actually did sound like that…

Remus hid his face in his arms "Oh god…"

Before the thought of marriage could linger, the subject they were talking about ran up to the table.

Sirius looked completely overjoyed as he joined them at the table, next to Remus "YES! As of today, I'm completely free of the hospital wing! And it's all thanks to you Rem!"

"Rule number one!" he said quickly as Sirius turned to hug him.

Though Sirius hadn't noticed, the moment he came in everyone turned their attention to the Gryffindor table.

"Oh right! Sorry." Sirius said, turning away.

Remus could swear that for a second he saw a look of hurt cross those gray eyes, but Sirius showed no signs of it as he reached for a plate and began eating. Remus shook his head "_Must be imagining it._" he thought.

Sirius was actually acting quite normal.

Talking about how schoolwork was to easy, joking with James, teasing Peter and laughing heartily. In fact, it was so normal that nearly everyone lost interest in watching them and went back to eating and talking to their own friends.

"Ah Sirius, it's good to have my best mate back!" James said with a grin.

Sirius nodded "To true James, to true!"

There was no denying James and Sirius were practically like brothers so of course they'd missed messing around in classes and snagging detentions together.

Lunch went on with no real problems. Only thing even slightly out of the ordinary was Sirius kept glancing at Remus more often, but he never did anything so there wasn't any real problem.

Remus inwardly sighed, "_Well, if the rest of the days are like this, then it'll be no problem._" He thought.

But then again, when's anything ever been easy?

---

End A/N: Hmm…easy life, or interesting conflict…hard choice for an author to make huh? Heh, hope you liked the chap, I know it's a bit short, but I'm kinda in a rush at the moment. I'll make it up to you though, next chapter'll be better! Don't forget to review now!


	6. Chapter 6

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey peoples! I'm so glad you guys reviewed me! I was pleasantly surprised by how much people liked the last chapter. Like I said, it was a bit rushed so I'm surprised everyone liked it. Thanks guys, well, here's the next chapter hope you like it!

Disclaimer: Guys I am SOOOOO sorry! I'm posting this chapter early just because of this! mysid just alerted me that I was calling her Rolling not Rowling! I'm such an idiot! J.K I'm soooo sorry! It's just, the disclaimer is so…tedious! I wasn't even paying attention when I did it. I just typed it out once then copied and pasted it on all the chapters, like we're suppose to. But I never thought anyone actually READ it! I know I didn't, otherwise mysid wouldn't have to tell me of a mistake. Thank you so much for telling me, now I've gotta fix it. As for everyone else, **I'M SORRY!!!!!** Seriously, I'm sorry…I feel so guilty. TT

**Chapter 6**

For a while it seemed as though the gossip on them had died out. In fact, in Herbology a girl passed him a watering can without sneering at him or spitting on it first!

Yes, things were finally starting to work out…well, for Remus anyway. Sirius, on the other hand, had a lot on his mind. And he had to talk to someone about it or he'd explode.

It was about midday and all the 6th years had a free hour. The Gryffindor common room was practically empty because it was such a nice day out, most thought it was perfect to go study and work outside.

Peter looked out the common room window "You guys wanna go outside?"

The Marauders were the only ones still indoors.

Remus smiled "Yes, I wouldn't mind getting a bit of fresh air and stretching my legs." Now that the pressure was off him, Remus was much less grumpy and reverted back to the way he was before.

"Hang on, let me get my bag and stuff so we can head out." James said.

Sirius said nothing, merely sat in a chair by the empty fireplace.

"Mind if we wait outside?" Remus asked.

James shrugged "Whatever."

Peter looked over at Sirius "You comin'?"

He looked up "Um, in a moment."

Peter held his gaze at him for a moment then looked at Remus but said nothing and went out. For a moment Remus seemed as though he wanted to say something to Sirius but at the last second decided against it and followed after Peter.

Once they'd closed the door behind them Sirius got up "Um, hey James?"

James had his back to him, gathering quills and stuff in his back "Oh, stayed to help me pack the picnic?" he asked jokingly.

Sirius sighed, "James, I'm serious."

"I thought you looked familiar."

"James."

His tone made James turn around. He wasn't remotely smiling as he looked at his friend.

James put his bag down "You alright?"

Sirius sat back down with a sigh "Hardly. James I feel weird. Like…it's great being with Remus and all but…I wanna do something for him, something nice. I love seeing him smile and…"

"And you just feel like doing something, anything to gain her approval, er his, sorry." James said in a sort of far off voice, as though he'd been there before…which actually, now that he thought about it, he had!

Sirius nodded "Yeah. But the thing is, no matter what I do he doesn't seem to-"

"Want anything to do with you." James said as though he knew all to well.

"Yes! I mean, the harder I try-"

"The more she seems repulsed by you."

"YEAH! James, come on, what can I do? How did you get Lily to come around to you?"

James sat back in his chair and looked at the ceiling thoughtfully "Well…to be honest, it's hard to say. I mean, Lily's not exactly Remus so it might not be the same thing…"

Sirius downhearted look made James continue, "But…with her, I took her on a date. All it took was that one chance. A chance to prove to her I'm not just some little kid. She gave me the chance and has been with me ever since."

"Oh…so, whaddya do?"

James grinned and looked up happily at the memory "Well, I did what Remus said I should've done and snuck us out of school using the Honeydukes trapdoor. She was amazed by that alone but as we walked around Hogsmede together we started talking. The more I talked to her the more she seemed to come around. She's really great, you know? Even feels bad for that awful muggle sister of hers. She told me all about her, sounds like an awful person to me but she still cares about her…anyways, when we got to the Three Broomsticks I bought us a couple of butterbeers. As we drink up I told her how I really feel. You know, in the heart. Now I know what you guys would've said if you or anyone else was there so I told her when we were alone. She was surprised. I mean, she honestly thought I just liked her for her body and stuff like that. Also, she said I was trying to hard a lot of the time. She actually found it kinda creepy. I laughed and we both laughed and…well, after that, I got a goodnight kiss and we've been goin' out for 3 weeks now. I guess what really did it was that we talked. Talking means a lot in a relationship."

For a moment he closed his eyes and wistfully thought of that day, but when he looked back he was surprised to see Sirius with a parchment and pen, taking notes!

"Hm 'Tell how I really feel'…'Talking equals important'…" He muttered as his quill moved over the parchment.

"W-wait a second though! Y-you know, I just…maybe you shouldn't I mean, he's a guy, he might not like all that stuff!" James said quickly.

Sirius grinned "Ah, but that's the beauty of it. I'll think of my own thing, but use these as guidelines! It's perfect! All I gotta do is think of a way for us to be alone and talk to him, and I mean really talk to him this time! If he wants, I'll even talk about myself! Yes…of course! Thanks James!" and he got up with an eager grin on his face.

James watched him leave and once he was gone he hit his head on the table "…Remus is gonna kill me…"

---

The next few days were making Remus suspicious. Sirius was far to reserved to be up to 'nothing' as he always said. He had a piece of parchment and muttered to himself as he wrote but when anyone, especially Remus, asked what he was doing he'd jam the paper into his robes and say 'Nothing!' with an air of glee.

Remus was concerned, to say the least. And his feelings weren't helped by the nervous looks James would cast him or the way Sirius would sometimes look up, grin at James and wink, then James would shrink down a bit.

It was time to find out what was going on.

James slowly peeked around the dormitory before going in. Last thing he wanted was to be alone with Sirius, who constantly asked for more advice or Remus who was getting more suspicious by the day.

He sighed in relief when he saw no one there and went to his trunk.

"Hello James." A voice said pleasantly behind him.

He nearly jumped out of his skin "Remus! Oh you…you startled me…"

Remus nodded and closed the door behind him as he came in "Right…so, whatcha doin?"

He shrugged "Just…you know…gonna take a nap and-"

"Alright that's enough. James, I know Sirius is up to something and I know you've had a part in it. Tell me." Remus said, suddenly very serious as he locked the door magically.

James glanced around, no teachers, no Peeves, no escape this time "Ummm…I…dunno what you're talking about!"

Remus frowned "Don't make me use force James."

James knew all to well that Remus was just as threatening now as he could be in werewolf form. Though he looked very frail and feeble, he had the power of a wolf in his small frame and he wasn't a bad hexer either.

"Um…ok…now don't get mad! But…um…you see I…he kind of…um…" James started out horribly. By the time he was able to straighten his words out and tell what had happened Remus was, as he expected, furious.

"YOU WHAT?!?!"

James cringed slightly "Well…I didn't think he'd really listen!"

Remus raked his hands anxiously through his hair "You…you…you…WHAT THE HELL WHERE YOU THINKING?!?"

"Remus calm down!" James said, surprised at how deranged his friend was looking as he nearly ripped out his hair "It's not…I mean, you never know…maybe, maybe he won't come up with anything-"

"Oh he's coming up with stuff! You see the way he smiles when he's written something really good?! How could you do this to me?! You know he's under the strongest love potion there is and…UGH!"

James frowned "Well what was I supposed to do!? He's my best mate, you're my best mate and you both keep asking me what to do! I mean you should've seen him! The man's pitiable! What was I suppose to tell him 'sorry, I can't help you?' It'd crush him!"

Remus plopped on his bed "I don't know, anything! But not dating advice! I mean…oh…and here I thought this'd be easy…" with nothing more to say, he buried his face in his pillow.

It was silent for a moment while James looked apprehensively at Remus for a while, as if afraid he'd suddenly jump up and attack him. Actually, quite the opposite happened.

"James." He said suddenly "If you have any human decency, you'll kill me…"

James threw a pillow at his back "Oh stop it! Look, just…go along with it! I mean, it's been working so far right?"

Remus did not lift his head from the pillow.

---

Remus watched Sirius anxiously as he had a bit of parchment out again and continued writing. He looked as though he'd had a great idea he didn't want to lose as he wrote.

"_Ugh, if only I could get that paper from him._" He thought, biting his lip.

It was another nice day and they hung out at their usual spot by the lake. Remus glared accusingly at James who shrugged in reply. In his mind it was still all James' fault while Peter remained out of the loop.

All the same, not knowing what Sirius was writing was making Remus anxious.

Slowly, he cleared his throat "So…still not gonna tell us what you're working on?" he asked Sirius as casually as he could.

A grin came to his face though he didn't look up "Oh it's nothin', just some extra work I'm doing…"

He nodded "Hm…so why can't we see it?"

Sirius looked up, Remus sounded sort of funny as he spoke "…Because…"

"Well…as you're…(he struggled to get the word out) b-boyfriend, shouldn't I be allowed to see it?" Remus pressed.

Sirius looked shocked for a minute "Um…well…yes but-"

"Then let me see."

"No, I don't think I will."

"Why not?"

"It's a surprise!"

"What's a surprise?"

"Nothing!"

Remus frowned; sweet-talking was getting him nowhere.

He scoffed and crossed his arms "Oh, alright then, keep your secretes!"

Sirius smiled, thinking he was safe and pulled the parchment out again.

"Accio parchment!" Remus said abruptly.

But Sirius wasn't completely off guard; he quickly pulled out his wand and pointed at his hand with the parchment "Bondomotus!" and the parchment stayed stuck to his hand, canceling out Remus' spell.

Remus frowned at Sirius cheeky grin "Gonna have to do better then that! Whoa!"

James and Peter nearly fell back as Remus suddenly tackled Sirius. "GIVE ME…THAT…PARCHMENT!!!" he struggled to say as he tried to grab the hand that hand the parchment.

"N-…NO!" Sirius also said difficultly as he dodged Remus' outstretched hands.

For a moment they both wrestled to get the paper but then Sirius got an idea.

When Remus didn't expect it, he lifted his head and kissed his lips with all his might. As he thought, Remus froze in that moment as though he were the Whomping Willow being poked in the knot at the root.

But Sirius didn't dally.

Once Remus was still he got up from underneath him and ran.

Remus shook off the shock and pursued him.

"COME BACK HERE! GIVE ME THAT PARCHMENT!"

"NEVER!!"

Peter watched until they disappeared from sight then looked at James.

"I don't know." James said to his unasked question.

Peter still looked confused but didn't question it any further and went back to the book he was somewhat reading.

---

Remus was a tad petulant at dinner that night but for some reason Sirius just grinned at this.

"If he's in a bad mood, it'll make him all the more happy when I tell him what I was writing about!" Sirius whispered to James.

James looked at him uneasily "And that would be…"

But Sirius didn't answer, as always he flashed a great smile and continued eating.

Finally, all the food was gone and everyone went to bed.

"(Yawn!) Well, it's been a long day better get some sleep, G'night!" Sirius said quickly and hurried ahead of them to their dormitory.

James and Peter looked at one another then slowly glanced at Remus but didn't dare say anything as he still looked a bit cross and ready to snap if you spoke to him.

By the time the other three had gotten to the dorm as well Sirius was in his bed, apparently asleep.

The other's wordlessly got dressed for bed and joined him in sleep…

---

_**A wolf ran in the forest, ignoring the occasional branch that got stuck in his fur as he went. He was looking for someone, something…his nose told h**__**im blood was near by, a wounded animal probably.**_

_**He made a sharp turn and nearly fell but didn't stop running. He was nearly biting his tongue in anticipation. That delicious smell…food was close by, maybe someone to fight to…**__**the thought made him shiver in excitement.**_

_**"Rem…" the wind seemed to whisper.**_

_**The wolf looked**__** around but didn't stop running;**__** the smell was so close…he could just taste it!**_

_**"Rem…Remus…" the wind blew louder in his ears.**_

_**No, not yet! The pray**__**, it was just around the corner…**_

_**"Remus, Remus!"**_

Remus bitterly opened his eyes and nearly fell out of bed when he opened his eyes to see Sirius face so close to his. He opened his mouth to yell but Sirius quickly put a hand over it.

"Shhh…quiet, no one's awake yet." He whispered.

Remus slowly looked around; the sun wasn't even up yet!

"Sirius, what the hell's wrong with you? It's got to be at least 3 in the morning!" he whispered loudly (at least as loud as one can whisper and still call it whispering).

Even in the dark Remus could see him grin "4 actually. I figured you should at least get 8 hours sleep, didn't want you to cranky or you might not like it as much and not enjoy yourself."

"What are you talking about? 'Like it as'…Sirius what are you talking about?" he asked impatiently.

But he didn't answer, he turned his back for a moment, then threw a cloak at Remus "Come on, I hear it's a bit chilly at this hour."

Remus groaned and pulled the cloak over his pajamas as he sat up, once he had it on he stood up next to Sirius "There, now will you please tell me what's going on? Where are we going?"

Sirius grinned as he shoved his wand in his pocket, "You'll see. Come on, James said I could borrow the cloak."

Remus made a face, but it was unseen in the dark as Sirius pulled James' invisibility cloak over them. Silently as they could they made their way out of the dorm, into the common room and into the hall.

The Fat Lady was startled when she opened "Who's there?" but when no one answered she shrugged, closed and went back to sleep.

He didn't even bother asking Sirius where they were going anymore; he knew he wasn't going to answer. But all the same, he couldn't help wonder as they made their way almost what appeared to be the Great Hall…but then they passed it.

As they walked down the hall they were extra quiet as Peeves bobbled down humming what sounded like the 'Loony Loopy Lupin' song. He grinded his teeth but resisted the urge to hex the little nuisance.

Finally, they got to the big doors and went outside. The wind immediately hit them as the door opened. Remus breathed deep as Sirius took the cloak off and shoved it in his pocket.

The wind hitting his face as though he were running through the ground…it reminded him of the dream he was having. Inwardly he frowned, sometimes he had dreams like that and as much as he hated it, he really enjoyed the ones like that.

"_Damn…as if the wolf doesn't get enough every full moon, it has to have my dreams now to…_" he thought sullenly.

Sirius turned once the cloak was safely in his pocket "Well, I don't think we need the cloak anymore, come on." As he said this he grabbed Remus' wrist.

Remus rolled his eyes but allowed Sirius to pull him along. Everything always looked so different at night, he could hardly see the lake seeing as the moon was hidden as clouds rolled in, how full it was he wasn't sure, but it was out of sight at the moment.

"_Thank god…_" he thought.

No, only the stars showed anything and they weren't shining all that brightly tonight. However, as they walked along, Remus squinted and noticed they were close to the Quidditch field.

Sirius suddenly picked up the pace as though he were extremely excited about where they were going, squeezing Remus' wrist a bit tighter. They stopped at the broom closet.

Now Sirius released him "Ok, here it is!" he pulled open the closet and pulled out a broom that shone brightly even in the darkness of the early morning.

Remus gapped at the broom "Is that…a Swiftsweep?"

Sirius grinned "Yep! Got the idea from you actually. All I had to do was send dear old mum a letter from 'Regulus' saying I, he, wanted a new broom. Course she coughed up the gold for it. I've been forging the git's handwriting for years. Only way to get anything! I had it sent to Dumbledore's office so it wouldn't get attention and he put up for me. In the letter I told the old bat that I, Regulus, didn't want to rub my wealth in their faces until we had a game." He made a face and did an imitation of his mother "…'that's my boy! Such a good child, a true Black.' Hahaha!"

Remus nodded as he held the broom out for him to look at "I see…and, you woke me up at 4 in the morning to look at a broom?"

Sirius grinned "Oh no, not look. You remember a while ago when me and James were goin' on about Quidditch and you told us you've never even ridden a broom before?"

Remus slowly nodded "Yes…"

He put his leg over the side of the broom "That changes today."

"What? Ride with you?"

He nodded "Yeah! Here, just get on the end and put your hands on my shoulders…ok? Yeah, there you go…now hold on tight."

When Sirius said hold on tight, he wasn't joking. The moment he kicked off the ground Remus lost grip of his shoulders and quickly grabbed his waist to keep from falling off.

Sirius didn't seem to notice as he flew around whooping out loud, the echo nearly as loud as the real thing. For a while Remus hid his face in Sirius' back, to afraid after nearly falling to death.

But slowly, he lifted his head and the wind hit his face. He glanced to the side and saw the castle for the first time. The ground at Hogwarts looked so different from a broom's view…so beautiful.

Remus slowly loosened his grip on Sirius as he relaxed more. The view was heavenly and the wind was perfect…how a Quidditch player always stayed on the field was beyond him because being there, he felt he could just fly away.

As they flew, Sirius did a few tricks in the air then zoomed over the Forbidden Forest. The tallest trees didn't even brush their ankles as they went. Remus looked slightly confused as Sirius lowered a bit. But he only did it to weave in and out of the trees.

Remus rolled his eyes but smiled "Showoff!"

Sirius laughed and continued to just barely get around everything. It seemed as though every tree they were about to hit jumped out of the way almost. Remus smiled and looked at the ground below.

The Forbidden Forest…he'd only really been in there once. People always said there were werewolves in there but he knew it was a lie the first time he came. He'd never heard any of their calls or else he might have been tempted to go in there. He could tell he was the only one at Hogwarts.

He frowned slightly because deep down, though he didn't want to admit it; that upset him. For a moment he wondered if he should ask Sirius to take them down so they could walk around the forest floor, however…

"DUCK!"

_****__**WHAM!!!**__****_

---

"Are you sure you're ok?"

"I'm fine! I think I have a slight concussion though…"

What happened was; Sirius went by a tree, low branch. Remus wasn't fast enough and all but fell off the broom. Sirius somehow managed to keep a good grip on him and flew quickly to the Astrology tower where they now sat.

Sirius looked extremely guilty "I'm sorry! Why'd I have to be such a show-off? I'm so STUPID! I'm really sorry."

Remus rubbed his head, which throbbed painfully without the slight pressure to hold it down. He was feeling really dizzy but otherwise ok. A few scratches here and there but ok.

"I wish I knew some Healer spells…god, I'm so sorry Remus!" he said for the umpteenth time.

Remus waved off his apology "I said it's fine! I didn't die or anything."

"Yeah but this was your first time on a broom, I wanted it to be fun and special! Not…painful and stupid…" Sirius muttered the last part, looking ready to kick himself.

A bit of pity sprouted amongst the dizziness. Remus put his hand on his shoulder bracingly "But it was fun! Really! I was enjoying it! Up to the tree that is…"

This didn't seem to make Sirius feel any better as he held his knees to his chest and stared at the ground, his eyes weighed down with guilt.

Remus sighed, "Sirius, I'm not mad. It was an accident. Accidents happen!"

The voice in his head scoffed "_Strangely enough they always seem to happen to ME but…_"

Sirius sighed sadly "I know but…gee, I just…I'm sorry."

Remus nudged him slightly "If you say you're sorry one more time I'll push you off the tower. I'm telling you, it's fine! I'm not mad! I had a great time and will remember this forever…and not just because there's a big welt in my head reminding me."

Sirius chuckled softly and silence fell between them.

For a moment the wind was the only sound as it swept passed their ears.

"You know, you never really talk about yourself…" Sirius said suddenly.

Remus looked up "Hm?"

"You. I mean, it's like you'd rather pretend that there's nothing about you to talk about." Sirius said slowly.

He shrugged "Well, there isn't."

Sirius gave him a look "Ah come off it. Everybody's got a story to tell."

But still, Remus didn't seem to budge and wouldn't talk about himself…as Sirius expected.

"Fine, if you won't tell me about you, I'll tell you about me!" He said in a fake angry tone.

Remus glanced at him "Oh, what about you? How you love Quidditch, hate your parents and all that stuff that I already know." He was hinting there was nothing to talk about.

But, Sirius either didn't hear it or ignored it "As you know, my whole family's pure blood and stuff. Not that I have anything against pure bloods, James is a pure blood you know. But them…they're obsessed with it…"

As he first started out Remus only half listened, but as he went on, he found out quite a few things he didn't know about his friend. There were moments of anger, laughter and even sorrow as he talked, going into more detail about his home life then Remus had ever heard from him.

"-So I just couldn't take it anymore. They were all a bunch of idiots in my opinion and I can care less what happens to the whole lot of them! I took my bike and rode to James' place. They said they'd be glad to let me stay again this summer so I'd have a place to stay until I finish school, which I'm grateful for. There a nice bunch, those Potters…good people. They took me in as though I were a second son. Heh, if I'd have stayed home though I'd have gotten a good beating for that one! You know seeing as I was 'not a worthy enough person to bear the name Black.' As mum always loves to say." He let out a hollow laugh at that but still frowned with deep loathing.

"But…don't you ever-" Remus stopped. He was about to ask don't you ever think about them, even just a little but decided against it. It seemed his family was not the best thing to talk about.

Sirius didn't seem to have heard him anyway as he went on "They always think they're these perfect beings, like gods or some shit like that…I hate them…every last one of them…" he whispered, glaring at the ground below as if he saw them standing there. "I don't want to be 'worthy of the name Black'. If they knew…hm, they'd probably kill me! Hanging around with muggle-borns, in love with a werewolf…it'd give my dear old mum a heart attack." He said with a twisted smirk on his face.

Remus shifted uncomfortably as it got silent.

Neither looked at one another as the wind blew in their ears and the sun was slowly starting to peak from behind the mountains; it was probably 5 or 6 in the morning.

"…You know, and this is somethin' I don't usually say but, I…" Sirius started "…I was always sort of…afraid. Afraid that if I lived in that house to long…talked to them, I'd end up being like them. That's why I tried so hard to get them angry, to be told I was unworthy of the name Black. Afraid the apple didn't fall far off the tree, you know. When we first came to Hogwarts I was begging, pleading that I wouldn't get Slytherin like the rest and…well, I didn't but still…even today…sometimes I'm afraid…what if that hat made a mistake? What if it's wrong? What if I'm like them…"

"You're not. I know you're not. You're too noble and too good a person to be a 'true' Black." Remus said before he could stop himself.

It was quiet for a moment.

Sirius looked at him for the first time in a while; a strange, grateful smile on his face "…Thanks Remus, that's the best compliment you could've given me. Besides, I best not dwell on those thoughts. I should just gotta keep movin' forward, 'cuz you never know what the future holds for you."

Remus shrugged sheepishly and mentally smacked himself.

Once the little pause finished, he went on, only now having gotten his family out of the way he talked about other things. School, people he'd met, his first meeting with James to and then…

"Actually…ok, now this is something I never told anyone. Not even James, so you have to keep it under your hat." He said slowly.

Remus felt his heart beat faster, why would he share things with him and not James? Did he truly trust him that much or was it just the potion that made him trust him? Either way, Sirius spoke.

"You know that one girl in our fourth year? The one that had brownish-blond hair that always seemed to want to hang out with us?" he said.

Remus thought for a moment "Um…I think so…Glada or something like that?"

"Gloria. Yeah…well, I went out with her for a while…I mean, I really went out with her. Not like with all those stupid girls that won't leave me alone till they eat lunch with me. No, she was a steady girlfriend, the only one other then you I was ever really involved with. I didn't tell anyone though; I didn't want to draw attention to it."

Remus stared at him for a moment but didn't interrupt "_A girlfriend? And didn't even tell us or James?_" he thought.

A strange feeling started to clench his stomach…was that anger?

"Well, it was fine for a while, we lasted a year and 3 months and then…well, I'm not gonna lie. Spending all that time with us, she noticed your absences and put it together with the lunar charts she did in Astrology."

Remus' eyes widened "You…you mean…"

"Yup. She knew. I made her promise not to tell and she didn't. But she was really nervous to be around you after she found out and no matter how many times I told her you were fine and that there wasn't anything to worry about in…in the end, she made me choose. Either you or her…I panicked…I didn't know what to do…when I didn't give her an answer though, she went away. I heard she got transferred to Durmstrang…she never even said goodbye…" he looked down at the ground once more, now clearly with sorrow rather then hate.

That twinge in Remus' stomach turned into a burn, however, he ignored it. This made sense; it would explain why Sirius never wanted to be in a relationship again anyway.

He sighed "But it's probably for the better though. I mean, if she's stayed, I'd have told her that I'd never turn my back on my friends and it's the truth and then she'd probably still be around never speaking to me. You guys are one in a million and I wouldn't give you up for anything…still…I think about her, sometimes, when I least expect it, she'll just run across my head…" slowly a smile came to his face "Not that it matters, you're so much better then she was, I'd rather go out with you then her any day. I trust you fully, something I never quite did with her. Sure I trusted her but I never really told her…half the stuff I've told you actually. I like to keep to myself see, whether I show it or not…but I trust you."

The burning in his stomach was put out as though he just drank a barrel of water and a cooling sensation filled him to the top.

Remus stared at his shoes "I…well…I-I don't know what to say. Being a werewolf I'm used to no one trusting me but…" he slowly looked up, a smile on his face "Thanks…you really don't know how much that means to me…"

Sirius returned the smile and for a moment, neither did anything. Sirius hesitantly reached out a hand and moved some of Remus' hair from his face. Remus didn't encourage or pull away from it, but stayed where he was as Sirius moved closer, it was almost as though they were in a trance of some sort…Sirius was inches from him now, he could feel his body heat radiating from his body and his heart quickened…

Both nearly jumped out of their skin when there was a sudden crash from inside the tower followed by a yell "PEEVES! GET BACK HERE!!!"

Then a cackle "You'll have to catch me Filthy Filchy! HAHAHA!"

Remus gasped "Peeves and Filch!"

"Quick, grab on!" Sirius said as he jumped to his feet and pulled the broom.

Remus got on and they both went to the broom closet. Once the Swiftsweep was away Sirius pulled out the cloak and they both went under it. They ran across the grounds and, as quietly as they could, got inside. Then to the Fat Lady, then in the common room, and back to their dormitory.

Both panting slightly, they pulled off the cloak. Sirius put it back in James' trunk and Remus took off his cloak as well. Once everything was back where it should be they both sat down for a moment on the ground.

"Whew…that was close!" Sirius whispered.

Remus nodded "Yeah…"

Sirius' foot gently touched Remus'. They both looked up at one another at the small contact. Neither said anything, it was as if they were back on the Astrology tower with the trance over them once more, a strange feeling came over Remus and…

A big yawn escaped his mouth. That was all it took and the trance was broken. Both looked away from each other embarrassedly and it was still for a moment before they both stood up and walked silently to their beds.

Remus smiled and got into his bed "Well, that was all good fun but if you don't mind, I think I'll try to get some sleep."

Sirius nodded as he made his way to his own bed to "Right…well, g'night er, morning."

Remus smiled "Good morning." and pulled his blankets to his arms.

As he lay there for a moment, he thought about it, all of it…flying, the injury…Sirius talking…a part of him was glad, he chose him over that girl.

"Not that it matters or anything! I'm just glad I'm important to my friends!" he said quickly to himself before the thought could linger.

He sighed as he got comfortable, a small bit of him cursing his tiredness and wished he hadn't yawned but quickly shook his head.

"_Just be glad you did! __Be…be glad, cuz you DON'T love Sirius…not like that!_" he mentally shouted. Still, as his eyes began to close his last thoughts were of Sirius' face, the look of love he'd never really seen directed at him before.

---

End A/N: Hi there! Ohhh, that was a good chapter eh? I hope you liked it as much as I did! Well, you wanna know what happens next, you're gonna have to review and stay tuned, thanks!


	7. Chapter 7

Accidents happen

A/N: Hey out there reading public! I hope there are still people out there reading and whoever's around, thanks! If you liked the last chapter I'm glad you stuck around! So without further ado, chapter 7!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K **ROWLING** (see, I fixed it!) thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it really bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, it is called fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam; each playing minor rolls in this story.)

**Chapter 7**

The next few weeks after the late-night date they had, things were a bit…different.

Remus was oddly quiet and distant. Yes, he was with them all _physically_ but his mind seemed to be elsewhere so it didn't really seem like he was there at all.

"You know, this wasn't the reaction I was hoping for." Sirius murmured to James.

James frowned "I don't know why you're whispering, he's not listening. Here, watch this. HEY REM, YOU'RE CLOAK'S ON FIRE!!" he shouted with enough fake fear to make a few people turn around.

Remus, however, was not one of them. He simply nodded without looking up and continued walking as though nothing was said, a thoughtful look still etched on his face.

"Whaddya think he's thinking about?" Peter asked as their friend narrowly missed hitting a wall.

Sirius sighed sadly, "What I wouldn't give to know Legilimency…"

Meanwhile, in Remus' head…

"_This is insane; you don't know what you're thinking!_" Remus told himself for the 5th time.

After the early morning broom ride, he'd had some confusing dreams. They were all fuzzy when he woke up but he distinctly saw Sirius' face every time, he was smiling and leaning close to him, that same feeling he got at the top of the Astronomy tower. At first he just shrugged it off as nothing but the dreams continued and whenever he was with Sirius it was all he could think about.

"_They say dreams are results of things we're thinking about…or something like that, but I'm not- I mean, it…it's pretend, don't be stupid, I don't love Sirius!_" he thought.

'_Do you?_' a mischievous voice in his head said.

"_NO! It…it's the potion; he doesn't mean anything he says! It'd be stupid to forget that and I am not stupid! Besides, it not like he ever does anything or says anything, I've just seen his face! For all I know that could mean the __antidote 'll__ be ready! Who knows, I'm no expert in Divination!_" he yelled at the voice.

That seemed enough to silence the voice but not to get the thought out of his head.

"_But why?__ Why his face? Why not someone with the potion or something?_" he thought as he vaguely walked around school.

He was like that in all his classes. Randomly pointing his wand without even saying the incantation (which sometimes ended up with something blowing up) and in potions he somehow managed to burn a hole through not only his caldron but the table and the floor as well.

Not that it mattered, Professor Ronts never really spoke to Remus much these days, not to compliment or punish. If she did speak to him, she usually ended up saying at least a hundred 'I'm sorry's, still claiming this was all her fault.

But out of everyone, Sirius was particularly concerned with his behavior.

"You don't think…I mean, what if I managed to injure his mind or something?" he whispered to James.

He, of course, had told James about their first 'date'. 'You helped, you should know, right?' he'd said when James asked why he was being told and not Peter or anyone else.

James shrugged "Who knows? Why don't you talk to him, see what's goin' on."

"Yeah…during our free class…" Sirius muttered.

---

The day seemed to drag on and on until the free hour all the sixth years had came to. Once it did, most people went outside, but Remus went to the common room.

Once he'd found out where he was, Sirius went up to the common room as well, but once he was there, found it rather difficult to speak.

"Er…Remus?" he said in surprisingly soft voice.

The room was somewhat empty, not too many people were there and the ones that were didn't notice them anyway. James said he'd take care of Peter but Sirius didn't feel like staying in there anyway so it didn't matter.

Remus nearly jumped as he was pulled out of his thoughts "Hm? Oh, yes?"

Sirius stared at his shoes "Um, there's somethin' I wanna…I mean…you wanna go for a walk?"

Remus looked slightly confused the way Sirius was acting but nodded "Ok…" and followed Sirius out of the Gryffindor common room. "_I wonder what's bothering him…_" he thought as they went.

What was bothering Sirius was that he'd been doing some thinking for himself.

"_What if he's having second thoughts about me? I mean, I nearly cracked his skull open! Maybe he's trying to think of a nice way to break up with me? Or something along those lines…_" he thought nervously.

Neither spoke or even looked at each other as they walked around the corridors…Remus slowly glanced at Sirius who didn't return the look. He was obviously troubled about something and a long, uncomfortable silence was getting them nowhere.

Taking a deep breath, Remus ventured on a limb.

"Sirius? You ok?" he asked slowly.

Sirius didn't answer right away. For a moment he just walked as though he hadn't heard him, however, just when Remus was about to repeat himself louder, he said "Do you like me?"

The question seemed to take Remus by surprise "Um…yeah. Course I do."

He sighed "No I mean…did…did you just say, you wanted to go out with me so I wouldn't…you know, off myself?"

Remus looked him in the eyes for the first time and saw the question was filled with dread. He was really serious about this. "_No he's not. It's just the potion._" He told himself curtly.

Outside of his head he allowed himself to smile "No, I meant it. Really!" he added when Sirius did not look convinced.

"Yeah well…if that's true, why don't you let me hold your hand, or kiss you? You never seem to want to be alone with me, I was surprised you even came with me now!" he said, suddenly angry.

Remus couldn't answer that. "_I can't very well tell him the truth, it'll make him furious! It's just pretend; you don't have to answer that so__ don't!_" he thought logically.

Sirius frowned "You act as though you don't even mean any of this! Like it's all a game or…or pretend or something!"

He inwardly cringed "_Why'd he have to use the word pretend?_"

"Sirius, you don't understand-"

"Yeah well I think it's about time I did! This isn't a joke or anything is it? Are you messing with me? Stop toying with me Remus! I need to know how you feel and I want the truth! How do you **really** feel?" he all but shouted; the sound echoing off the walls.

It got extremely quiet.

Remus stared at Sirius, unable to answer.

That was the question he'd been asking himself for days now and if he couldn't answer himself how could he answer Sirius, who didn't even know about the potion?

"I-I…"

Suddenly a classroom door opened.

Professor Sune marched into the corridor angrily "Mr. Black! Though I can't **force** you to use your time **wisely** I can tell you that there are other classes in session and-"

"Yeah, yeah, detention! I know. Look can we do this later? I'm kinda in the middle of something." Sirius interrupted impatiently.

Prof. Sune's face started to turn a bit red in anger "HOW DARE YOU-!"

"Uh, Professor Sune, sir um…it-it's not his fault! You know about…you know…the…er…the thing that…well…" Remus tried to say it was the potion talking without Sirius catching on.

But Professor Sune guessed before he spoke "Oh, you'd like me to think it were that, wouldn't you MR. Lupin?! HA! If you ask me, you and Black did this on purpose as just to have another excuse to act arrogant! Well, we'll see how confident you are when I take this up with the headmaster!" and with that said, he turned his heel and marched angrily away.

Sirius looked over at Remus "What was that about?"

"Um, nothing, look, let's just…go outside, ok?" he said quickly.

He sighed, "Whatever."

The anger from before had vanished from his voice and was replaced by moroseness as they walked to the doors, silence once more between them.

Remus was all too happy to be outside where there wasn't as big a chance of being overheard. That was a close call back there, but Sirius seemed to take no notice to just how close a call it was as he stared at the ground.

Now switched roles, Remus led the way from the castle and they walked around the edges of the lake. For a moment the silence came back only now Sirius was more depressed then anxious.

Remus sighed "Sirius, be honest, do you really think I'd have went out with you if I didn't want to? I mean, why else would I if I didn't want to? Do you really think I'm that vindictive?"

Sirius did not answer but continued to drag his feet beside Remus'.

"Why would I joke about something like that? You know me and I'd never do anything so cruel, especially to…someone as close to me as you are." He said slowly, careful to use the right words so he wouldn't be technically lying but not exactly telling the truth.

At that Sirius looked up "Yeah? Well, if I'm so close to you why don't you talk to me? And don't give me that look, I mean really talk to me, trust me enough to tell me about yourself, the real you."

Remus bit his lip "It's…difficult…I mean, what am I supposed to say? What do you want to know?"

Sirius shrugged "I don't know, just…do like I did. Tell me about you life outside of Hogwarts. You're family, things like that. I mean, in all the time I've known you, I don't think you've ever talked about them. One would think you'd come from nowhere!"

Remus sighed "Welllll…"

Sirius frowned "Come on, it'll be an even trade!"

He nodded "True…alright. Well, if you must know, I was born in London. We weren't always so…well, poor, but after I got bitten, my parents spent nearly all their money to try and find some way to help me. Not cure, there is no cure but…help of some kind, any kind. Still, it was a waste. The only thing we got out of it was advice we already knew. So, we were forced to move. And even if we didn't lose a lot of money, I would have to be moved to a remote location anyway. You know, for full moons. It had to be **far** away so we could find a place that didn't know about my…problem. Often times I feel like a burden to them, my parents. But they love me all the same and…well, not too much else to say about my life because it's always the same. Home, full moon and we have to move further into the country. That's about all."

Sirius stared at him for a moment "…What about your parents? What are they like?"

Remus smiled slightly "Well, my mom's probably the kindest woman you'll ever meet. She's really strong. Not physically but rather mentally. When we have to move suddenly or when my dad loses a job unexpectedly or anything serious happens to our family she's always there. She has a smile that could clear the sky and…well; I've never actually seen her break down. She's so strong…how I wish I had her strength…" as he said this he looked wistfully up at the sky, as though expecting to see his mother there.

Sirius smiled "You wish? Ah, don't be silly Rem, if ever I'd met someone mentally strong, it'd be you."

Remus scoffed "You give me to much credit…"

"_If I were strong, I wouldn't be having pointless conversations with myself…_" he added in his head.

There was a brief pause.

"…Well go on, keep talking!"

Remus smiled slightly and started to talk about the different places he'd lived. And to his surprise, Sirius listened attentively as he spoke and didn't interrupt once. Remus even managed to surprise himself with all he had to say. He'd never really thought of it before but he really did have stuff to talk about.

He talked about old muggle schools he went to because they were shunned from wizarding societies and had to live amongst the muggles who didn't know any better and places he'd once lived. He'd never really considered his family before but as he talked, he realized just how important they really were to him.

"And once, my father brought home these really fragile glasses from work. We were in a tight spot around then, he had to take a muggle job. What he had to do was make replicas of them for a pawnshop. Mum and I always helped him with work and we all had fun with that one. After making the correct replicas we started making all sorts of different ones out of things like the dressers, the sinks…mum even turned the cat into one! Hahaha, the cup hopped around mewling for hours!"

They both laughed at this as they went along, a few hours had gone by and some more people had joined them outside, apparently the classes had let out already though the sun still was as high as ever.

Sirius grinned "I never would've guessed you had fun out of school!"

"Well, to be honest, I never really give home much thought before…I guess I'm always to busy focusing on the bad things." Remus said truthfully.

Sirius nodded "See? I mean, you really should talk more! I'd never have guessed you knew so much about the muggle world. So, what were those um…oh what do you call 'em…those plugs for again?"

Remus smiled "Muggles use them to get a source of energy, kinda like magic. Only their energy is a thing called 'electricity'. And you know, they're not as stupid as you'd first think those muggles. Actually, it's amazing how they're able to go on without magic as my mum's said more then a few times when we had to live in a muggle village."

"Yeah…so, d'you like any of those muggle schools?" Sirius asked.

He shrugged "They were alright. Not that it mattered; I was never there for too long. Still…I remember once, I met this muggle girl. She was very kind to me. You see, even though they didn't know I was a werewolf, none of the other people really wanted to talk to me. I was shy, quiet and didn't seem to have much of anything. But she was different. She talked to me and we became friends. Oh, the fun we had…"

Sirius frowned jealously at the tone he used when he spoke about her "What happened to her then?"

Remus got abruptly quiet and looked as though he'd said too much. "We moved. Same as always happened." He said, though now his tone was brisk meaning, he wanted to just leave it at that.

Sirius wanted to press the matter, but one look at Remus' face told him it was best left alone.

Now the silence returned at full force.

Remus had that same thoughtful look on his face that he'd had all week as they did.

"…What've you been thinking about?" Sirius asked slowly.

Remus looked up "Hm?"

He sighed, the nervous feeling returning to his stomach "Well…lately, you seem to be…thinking…what, are you thinking about?" his voice was filled with fear, almost as though he were dreading Remus' answer.

Remus slowly gained a look of understanding "Oh my…is that what that was all about, back at the castle? You thought I was regretting going out with you?"

Sirius looked down at the ground "Welll…sorta…"

He chuckled "No, no…Sirius, I assure you, I haven't been thinking about breaking up with you."

Sirius looked somewhat relieved at the truth he heard in his voice but couldn't help asking, "What are you thinking about then?"

Remus sighed and rubbed his temples "It's hard to explain…even to myself actually. But, it's not important."

For the first time Sirius stopped walking and grabbed his hand, "Remus." He spoke in a soft tone which made Remus stop as well.

Sirius smiled as Remus faced him "You can tell me anything, ok? You can trust me. If something's bothering you, if you're feeling hurt or anything, even stupid things like…like you got a splinter or something, you can tell me, I mean…I trust you with myself, you can certainly trust me as much, I promise."

Remus was surprised by the sincerity in his voice; his heart began to race as it had before "Sirius…"

He smiled "I care for you and I'll do everything I can to help you…"

And they stood there for a while, just staring at one another, Sirius still holding Remus' hand and Remus trying to think straight but too many thoughts came at once and he got confused. Sirius leaned almost unnoticeably closer…

Suddenly, a small group of first years raced by.

"Come on! I swear, it's just this GIANT squid! I told you I saw it on the boat!" a boy yelled to his friends, bumping into Sirius but not showing any signs of noticing. As the rest of his little group came after him, they to bumped into Remus and Sirius in their hurry to get to the spot where he'd seen the squid.

Remus was by the edge of the lake and suddenly felt the ground beneath his feet slip as two kids ran by, bumping him slightly, but just enough to make him lose balance.

"Whoa!"

"Remus! I got you!" he felt Sirius grab the arm of his robes but-

RRRRIIIIIPPPPP!

**SPLASH!!**

The water felt like ice as he fell in and he could hardly see anything in the murky water. He quickly pushed himself back to the surface, coughing out the water that had gone down his throat or got in his nose, gasping for air.

Sirius was shouting angrily at the first years.

At the sound of Remus' coughing however, he turned back to help him back out of the water, giving the first years a chance to escape to the other end of the lake "Remus, are you ok?" his voice was laced with concern.

Remus held up a hand, still coughing slightly "I'm fine, I'm fine…it was nice compared to how hot it is out here."

"Yeah well, I told those little midgets off…little brats, think they own the place! Oh, sorry." He added, holding out the piece of Remus' robe he still in his hands.

Remus sighed as he took it from Sirius hand and put it where it should have been "Well, it's not the first time. I'll just have to sow it on…hm, I don't know those household spells too well though…"

"Oh here, let me do it!" Sirius said, pulling out his wand.

He opened his mouth to protest but before he could Sirius had already said "Bastantim!"

Remus made a noise of pain as it felt like an invisible sewing needle stitched not only the piece of his robe back to the robe but to his skin as well. Sirius eyes widened in shock as some blood slowly seeped through his robe sleeve.

"I was trying to tell you, those spells aren't meant for cloths if you're still wearing them." Remus said through his teeth that he clenched in pain.

"I-I can fix that!" Sirius said quickly.

"No, no, it's fine! I'll just…go to Madam Pomfrey!" Remus said, perhaps a little too quickly.

Sirius' face fell "But-"

"Um, I better go, see you later!" he said and hurried off, still holding his arm that was now starting to feel even more pain.

Sirius stared after him until he disappeared from his view. Even after he had been long gone he still looked…then he sighed miserably, brought his eyes to the grass and kicked the dirt sadly "Damn…"

End A/N: Awww, poor Sirius! Keep trying buddy. Well, whaddya think of that one? Pretty good for a reluctant chapter I think. Yes, I didn't really want to write this one originally, but I figured I should space things out a bit. Make it stretch the whole month in the story. Anyways, hope you liked it and if you did, you know what to do!


	8. Chapter 8

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Alright, this is it guys. After all the taunting and evilness that is my writing, this is one of the chapters (among other later chapters) that has the slash you've all (if not most of you) been longing for. If you are one of the almost none who HAVEN'T been waiting for this part, then please, don't whine to me how you don't like it. That is why the fic is rated M. So, with no more to say, I present chapter 8!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it really bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, it is called fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.)

**Chapter 8**

Remus winced as Madam Pomfrey magically undid the stitches that kept his robes to his arm. Once it was finally off she pulled up his sleeve and tutted at the damage done.

"Well, I've seen worse. Honestly though, who would use the charm when you still had the robes on?" she muttered as she pointed her wand at his arm that was bleeding profoundly, making it look much worse then it was.

"He was just trying to help! And it's not exactly like he's in the right state of mind at the moment!" Remus found himself saying defensively.

He was no longer wet, having been dried off the moment he stepped foot in the room.

She waved his comment off disregardingly "Right, right…well, that should be all. I can't do much for the scar but I've heard that if you dunk your cloths in Plinitum sap it takes out blood stains like there's no tomorrow."

Remus nodded and murmured his thanks as he got up to leave, still rubbing his arm. The scar wasn't that bad as other ones he had. It merely looked as though he'd gotten a long rectangular scratch that wouldn't go away.

As he walked out of the hospital wing though, he felt a twinge of guilt.

"_I think I may have hurt his feelings…_" he thought.

He didn't mean anything personal by wanting Madam Pomfrey to do it. First off, it was kind of his fault to begin with, second, it was really starting to hurt and he didn't want to risk anything and third, the biggest reason of them all…before any of that happened, they had a really uncomfortable moment, well, uncomfortable to him.

"_I'm just glad those first years came when they did…_" he thought, yet somehow, he didn't feel remotely glad about.

"_Maybe I should apologize…yeah, tell him it wasn't him just…it hurt and I figured a professional should handle it…yes that's it. It's a reasonable answer right?_" he thought.

Without realizing it his feet led him straight to the Fat Lady.

"Password?" she asked.

Remus looked up "_Maybe he already came__ back__ inside._" and said aloud "Windowmorph."

She nodded and swung open.

As he walked in he noticed there were very few people in today, no doubt enjoying the sunny day outside. One glance around the common room told him Sirius wasn't there.

"_The dorm__ maybe…_" he thought, making his way to the boy's dormitory.

He was just about to push the door opened when he heard his name said from within. He paused and stared at the door curiously "…I'm not normally one to eavesdrop (A/N: sure you're not) but…" it was the tone in which his name was said that kept him from opening the door.

From inside James groaned, "Oh would you stop?! Look at yourself! It's pathetic!"

"I didn't hear you saying that when Lily was the one we were talking about! You always came to me for advice, the least you could do is return the goddamn favor!" Sirius snapped.

It sounded as though James were going to turn it into a fight, but stopped himself at the last moment, probably by reminding himself that Sirius wasn't talking himself, the damn potion.

He heard Sirius sigh, "I don't know what to do James…I'm not good at this romantic stuff! Look what's happened in the first attempts, I nearly break his head, drowned him in the lake and just now, I practically took his arm off!"

Remus frowned; Sirius was being a bit hard on himself in his opinion.

The broom thing wasn't even his fault; he warned Remus about the branch, it wasn't his fault he wasn't listening and as for the water, it was mostly the first year's fault and anyone can make a mistake like sewing your arm to your robe…ok, maybe that last one not so much, but…you know!

Still, he remained silent as Sirius went on "I mean, it's no wonder he probably doesn't like me…I bet he likes her…that muggle girl he told me about…" he muttered sadly.

James footsteps were heard and the spring of a bed, meaning he'd probably sat down next to Sirius "Look, no one said being romantic was easy. So you messed up a few times, big deal! If I know Remus I'm sure he won't hold it against you."

"Right…" Sirius murmured.

It was quiet for a moment and Remus knees were starting to hurt from this bending.

He heard James sigh; it was filled with sympathy "Look, if you feel so badly about it, why not try making it up to him?"

"Hm…well, I don't know how…"

"Come on, you've been with him for a while now, think about it. What does he like that you can do for him?" James said encouragingly.

There was a pause in which Remus strained his ears to hear.

"…Well…he did say one of his favorite places to live was in the forest region and…" suddenly there was the sound of someone jumping to their feet "That's it! Oh, it's perfect! Why didn't I think of it sooner? I'll see ya later James!"

Remus quickly ran back to the common room, picked up a book and hid his face in it. And just in time too, for no sooner had he looked at the first word did he hear excited footsteps coming from upstairs.

He slowly glanced over the top of the book. A wide grin was on Sirius' face as he jogged to the portrait hole. Remus watched him until he was gone and was left practically alone to wonder what Sirius was up to.

Though he was terrible at romantic things, as he'd just said, Remus had to admire the effort.

---

_**The wolf ran once more, **__**not to something but away from.**_

_**A group of humans, far too many for one wolf alone to take**__**, was chasing him. They were**__** jeering and pointing those strange sticks**__** that shot sparks**__** at his hind legs.**_

_**He let out a yelp of pain as one of the sparks hit him, but kept running still, knowing if he didn't he would die at their hands.**_

_**"Remus…" a familiar voice whispered in the wind.**_

_**The wolf gazed up, recognizing the voice. It sounded so soothing compared to the loud noises of the humans chasing him. He continued to run, as the humans got closer…**_

**_"Remus!" it said again, filled with concern this time_**

**_The wolf raised its head and howled feebly, calling for the aid of the soft voice. But it did not come, whatever it was and he did not feel the safety he always got when the voice was around. Another shot hit his leg and he stumbled._**

**_The humans were louder then ever 'We got it, we got it!' they yelled._**

**_The injured wolf looked up at the sky and let out a shaky howl, one more fleeting plead for the voice to help him but no aid came as he lay on the ground._**

**_"Remus…Remus wake up!" was spoken on the wind that blew in his ears._**

**_The wolf wearily closed its eyes as the humans came near. They approached cautiously and stared at the body on the ground "…Yeah, we've got it. Ok, who wants the honor of the fatal blow?"_**

**_There were quite a few volunteers now that he was no longer a threat. And as the group gathered closer, he saw no faces. They were all wearing hoods and the darkness concealed them._**

**_Eventually, the picked someone and a few of the men moved aside, only once he did the wolf was gone and in its place laid a gaunt young man with graying tawny hair, tattered cloths and a prematurely lined face_**

**_He squeezed his eyes together and groaned in pain as he reached for his bleeding legs._**

**_"Right then, Yom's, you got the axe, cut its head off." The apparent leader said._**

**_The young man gasped and tried desperately to move, but his legs were heavy dead weight, he didn't have the strength to drag them after him. As he tried he let out a yelp of pain._**

**_But the men showed no compassion for his pain as the one with the axe moved forward and raised it high over his head…_**

Remus sat up so quickly he bashed head's with Sirius. Both bit their lips to keep from making any noises, as their other two friends were still asleep.

After the throbbing on his head stopped, Remus looked up "S-Sirius?"

Sirius, still rubbing his head nodded "Yeah. Are you ok? I heard you muttering in your sleep from the other side of the room…"

Remus wiped some of the sweat from his face "N-no, I'm ok, really…just a nightmare…"

"_The same nightmare._" His mind corrected.

It's true; he'd had the dream before but it wasn't to often he did. Usually it was his mother's voice that broke through the jeering though and he always received a tight hug and soft whispers of comfort as she stroked his hair. Once he'd calmed down she usually made him a mug of hot chocolate, tea or sometimes butterbeer if they had it and would stay with him till he was able to go back to sleep.

Still, he'd never had the nightmare at school before and something must've shown on his face because Sirius bent to his eye level and whispered gently "Hey…are you ok Rem?"

Remus tried to smile but his face would not obey so he simply nodded and said a soft "Yes…"

Sirius didn't look convinced "Do you want anything? We could sneak into the kitchen and get something if you like…"

"No, I'm fine." Remus said in a forceful whisper.

He felt a bit of guilt at his own voice as Sirius shirked away "Sorry…"

It was quiet for a moment as they looked awkwardly away from each other.

Remus cleared his throat softly, trying to cover up for that uncomfortable pause "So um…did you want something?"

Sirius looked up reproachfully "Well…I just…wanted to make up for what happened earlier but…I can understand if you don't want to go or…I'm sorry, I shouldn't have woken you…"

Remus sighed and still rubbed his head. Sirius sounded like a dog that'd just been hit with the newspaper, causing a bit of remorse spread to his legs and he got up from his bed.

"I'm sorry I snapped at you. Come on, let's see what you've got." Remus said as he pulled a cloak over his pajamas once more.

Sirius grinned and straightened up considerably "Right. I'll get the cloak."

---

As they'd done before, they walked down the halls, invisible, and met no one as they went. Remus was somewhat surprised when Sirius led the way to the door outside. Surely he wasn't going to repeat an act?

Sirius grinned, once more making Remus wonder if he could read minds as he said "No, it's not the same thing. Actually, I figured we should do a bit of rule breaking this time."

"You mean sneaking out in the middle of the night, grabbing a broom and riding around campus ISN'T breaking the rules?" he asked with a cheeky smile.

Sirius nudged him in the side "Oh ha, ha."

And again, once the door was opened the pleasant wind hit their faces. Outside was substantially brighter than the night before and the reason was because the moon was now more then half full, also with the stars being out, the sky was lit.

Sirius took the IC (Invisibility cloak, I'm gettin' tired of spellin' it out!) off once they were safely outside and stuffed it in his robes.

Remus stared at the moon for a moment and pulled his cloak tighter around him.

Sirius didn't seem to notice his hesitation and grabbed his hand "Come on."

He tore his eyes away from the moon and his shoulders relaxed as he allowed Sirius to take the lead once more. As he thought, they passed the Quidditch pitch and the broom closet and continued on.

What did surprise him was when they walked passed Hagrid's hut and headed to the Forbidden Forest.

"We're going into the forest?" he asked softly, not really sure why he was still whispering.

Sirius smiled "Don't worry; I made a path earlier so I know where it's safe."

Remus nodded and they continued, "_That would explain why he came back to the common room covered in dirt…_" he thought.

As they walked it was silent besides the sound of their feet and an occasional bird. Remus had to admit, the forest looked beautiful at night, lit by the half moon. He smiled and took a deep breath of the fresh air.

He'd always loved the forest; it was once a place he'd lived, just at the edge of one. Whether that was the wolf that did or him it was hard to tell, but the forest always brought him a peace of mind.

Sirius smiled at his reaction and continued on.

They walked for what felt like about half an hour, but the wind would always kick up and keep them cool as they walked through the trees and the rough.

Remus looked up when it got a bit darker "Uh-oh, looks like storm clouds are rolling in…" he commented when he saw the moon was partially covered by the clouds for a moment.

Sirius made a face "Oh…well we better hurry then, I wanna show you before it does!"

And they picked up the pace of their walk to a jog. His anxiousness fueled Remus' curiosity as they went. It felt like they were going up a sort of hill as they went and then, as they passed a tree they stopped.

Remus stared in amazement at what he saw.

They were at the brim of the forest and trees stretched on for miles and miles around beneath them, the mountains could be seen closer then ever and seemed to complete the scene. (Seriously, if you've ever seen the brim of a forest like from above it is SO gorgeous. Found that out on my last camping trip. )

"It…it's beautiful…" Remus muttered softly.

Sirius stood back with a smile "Yeah…I remembered you told me it was your favorite out of all the places you lived and…well, if anyone would appreciate this sight, I knew you would."

Remus smiled as he looked out…but slowly, a sort of remorseful feeling started to overpower the beauty of the area…as he stared at the trees that seemed to stretch on for miles small houses replaced a few of them in his mind's eye.

His eyes widened "_…It…it looks exactly the same…_" he thought as he stared down, his heart started to hammer in his chest.

He looked back to Sirius but he wasn't there. In his place was a small girl with braided red hair and freckles. She wore sort of woodsy cloths and was covered in a layer of dirt. Still, her bright blue eyes shone with a pure innocence that could only be found in a child and when she smiled, she was missing a tooth.

Remus closed his eyes and shook his head. When he opened them it was gone. They were in the forbidden forest, no houses and Sirius stood beside him talking about the landscape or something.

"-I mean you told me I know but, well…I thought this looked the closest to what you said and that it'd remind you of that house you said you loved so much and- Remus, are you ok?" Sirius asked.

He asked because Remus leaned against a tree, his face pale, as though he'd seen a ghost.

"It looks the same…the same place…" he spoke in a voice almost unrecognizable as it was laced with blame and pain.

Sirius put a hand on his shoulder "Remus…what are you talking about?"

He slowly looked up and his face was twisted with guilt "I…I never told you…or anyone…too ashamed…"

"'Bout what?" Sirius spoke softly, trying to calm him down.

Remus was shaking, though it wasn't cold "About…the time I first found out that I was truly…a monster…"

Sirius frowned "What do you mean?"

He took a shaky breath "…I was about 8 or 9…we had to live in the muggle world again just to scrape and my father didn't seem to like me after I got bit. Hm, I didn't tell you about him either, did I? He agrees with me, that I'm a burden, but my mother won't let him get rid of me cuz if it were up to him, he probably would've abandoned me the day it happened. Who would want a werewolf for a son?" there was a hint of dark laughter as he spoke "…I remember, before the bite, he use to say there was no better kid on earth than me…then it happened and he could barely stand to look at me at times…I think he saw the wolf in my eyes more then anyone else…"

The moonlight outlined his face, all those lines that shouldn't have been there were more obvious then ever.

"Anyways…we lived in a muggle village. I met a young girl named Sara-Su. A real country sort of name…she was something else that girl. She seemed about as poor as I was with those ragged clothes…we played for hours together and…and she always seemed to know how to make me smile…" he stopped and swallowed hard "But then…one of the nights with the full moon came and my mom locked me in the basement. But she didn't know…it's not her fault…Sara and I were playing in the basement earlier that day and we didn't lock the back part back up and…I should've known better, I was to careless! It's all my fault! If I'd just remember to lock the stupid door I…! I…I got out…"

Sirius was silent almost as if he didn't know what to say.

"I…I don't remember much of…of what happened but…apparently, Sara-Su was out gathering wood for the fire and…and…" he stopped and took a sharp breath "I just remember waking up with her body…she was dead…her- her blood was…everywhere…in my hair, my mouth, my hands…my hands…" he looked at his hands as though they were covered now.

Real tears came from his eyes as he stared at his hands "…Why won't it come off?" he whispered.

He covered his face "I can never forgive myself…never…my family and I, we…we got ran out of town that day. All they saw was a boy covered in the blood of a little girl, cradling her body and crying. No one asked questions and…I'm so sorry, that's all I was able to say I…I can't take this, I can see her now…like it's happening again! Don't see what I am? See why I'm afraid to be with people? Don't you see?! I'm a monster! A monster, that should always be hated!" he said, suddenly shouting.

Remus walked to the top brim once more "I hate this…I don't deserve to be here right now…why? What did I do to deserve this fate? What did Sara do to deserve that?! I…I killed her! Do you know what it's like to wake up with your friend's blood all over you!?"

Sirius seemed to be rooted in his spot and neither spoke…it slowly began to sprinkle.

"I wish I hadn't survived it…Sara was spared by death…I wasn't. And whenever people find out about what I am, then, I'm not Remus Lupin anymore! I'm 'the werewolf'! The nightmare I have is true! It's always true! I'm always alone because if I'm not then Sara-Su's 'll happen! I'm always alone and nobody can ever be there for me because if they are then I…I'll k-k-kill them!" he was all but screaming now, unable to hold back tears "And then, I don't have a name; I don't have anything! And it's always the same! 'It's a werewolf'! 'Stay back werewolf!' 'Be gone werewolf!' 'Keep that monster away from our village!'…Monster…I'm a monster…"

He sank to his knees with his hands in his face "…H-how can you love a monster? H-how can anyone ever love a m-monster like me?" he whispered so softly it was almost unheard.

Nothing but the sound of Remus soft sobs was heard for a moment. Remus refused to look up, his hair helping shield his face as he stayed on the ground. He felt completely weak and stupid…why was he crying now? How embarrassing!

Well, this was it. Sirius was probably gonna laugh at his weakness or just walk away to leave him to sulk in his misery or-

He gasped slightly when he felt a hand on his shoulder turn him around.

Sirius took his hand and pulled him back up on his feet. Remus stared at him, confused he was still there and Sirius stared back, an unreadable expression on his face. Suddenly he pulled Remus into a tight hug.

"Oh Rem…Remus, you're no monster. And anyone who says so is a dirty liar." Sirius whispered in his ear, stroking his hair.

Remus sniffled "But-"

"No. You're not. As far as I'm concerned, that wolf isn't a part of you and you DID NOT kill that girl." Sirius pulled back to look him in the eye "Remus, I don't care. I don't care if, if your werewolf, vampire, giant or a WHATEVER! This?" he held out his arm "This is only flesh! And it's not your flesh I'm after…"

Sirius wiped the tears from his cheeks with his thumb. "…I want your heart. You. Not the boy, not the wolf…I want Remus J Lupin…that's your name and you'll always have it, whether you're a wolf or not." he said softly, with such sincerity Remus forgot about the past arguments he'd been having with himself.

Sentiment such as he'd never felt filled his throat, suffocating him and enabling speech…he felt he could hardly breathe as the gap between the two got smaller and smaller…Remus closed his eyes, not knowing what else to do…

A twig snapped and the two sprang apart to see who'd joined them. A centaur with dark brown hair and body slowly made his way from the trees "There Bren, I told you I heard something."

Remus had been very loud in his confession and it wasn't to surprising he'd gotten some attention for it.

Another one, with a gray-ish pelt and black hair joined the one that had just spoken. He came forward with a significant air about him "Men are not allowed in our forest. Dumbledore said he would keep his youth out of it, why are you here?"

Neither Sirius nor Remus could come up with an answer for him; they merely tried to look humbled and ashamed.

"It matters not Bren, for we do not slaughter the innocent. We let you leave this time with your lives, but know, next time we shall not be so lenient." The dark brown one said.

Sirius nodded and made a slight bow with his head "Yes. We understand. Thank you for being so generous…we will go."

They knew from the Care for Magical Creatures class that centaurs were proud creatures and if you treated them with respect they would more then likely leave you alone.

He nodded "Good. Come Bren, we can't keep the hunting party waiting."

"Hold on." The one called Bren said.

He had been staring at Remus as the other was speaking and had been coming forward, staring intently at him "…This one is not human…" he said lowly.

Both Remus and Sirius stiffened.

The other joined him and stared at Remus "…Indeed, it's a werewolf."

The gray one frowned "What should we do with it?"

Remus swallowed hard, hopefully, they'd just let him go as well. He wasn't in the wolf form so he wasn't really a threat or anything…

"Hm…well, perhaps we should tell Owen about it, take it back to the herd." The other muttered.

Remus glanced at Sirius, who was suddenly frowning and clenching his fists, he looked as though he were going to interrupt the centaurs, a bad move for anyone to make.

"…Sirius…" he whispered warningly.

But the centaurs paid them no mind and continued arguing.

"Are you out of your mind? It's dangerous!"

"Well we can't just let it wander around out here wrecking the forest!"

Sirius took a step forward but Remus grabbed his arm "Sirius, don't, I'm not worth it!" he hissed.

The centaurs still didn't seem to notice them.

"Perhaps…it's not dangerous yet…if we tell it to leave…"

"But why not kill it now? The moon has not yet risen; it's harmless! If we rid it now then we won't have to worry of it."

"Yes…but that would be very underhanded and I will kill only in honor."

"(Sigh) Very well…Alright werewolf, we give you this warning. Leave our forest; never return and we'll spare your life. So be gone then, werewolf!"

"Don't call him that!" Sirius said angrily before Remus could stop him.

Remus' eyes widened, oh CRAP!

Bren glared at Sirius "You were told to leave. Do so and you will live."

"I will, and so will he because we're BOTH students at Hogwarts!" Sirius snarled.

Both the centaurs looked surprised "Is this true? Hm…"

"That man Dumbledore is perhaps more foolish then we thought, allowing a monster such as this to-"

Sirius looked ready to hit one of them "SHUT UP!! You dirty MULE!"

Remus covered his mouth, though he was not the one that said it and looked fearfully back at the centaurs.

That was just too far, both the centaurs stomped their hooves angrily. The sky got darker and the rain started to fall harder and thunder crashed all around the forest ground.

"You're foolishness will not be spared this time human!" Bren snarled angrily, lightening illuminating his face, making him look positively frightening.

But Sirius didn't seem to notice or care that they were armed and he wasn't. He frowned "I don't give a damn! You don't even know him, why just assume he's some kind of monster?!"

Remus glanced nervously at the centaurs who reached towards their bows that they had on their backs.

"_We've got to get out of here…_" he thought nervously.

"Your words are empty! That thing is a monster and why you would bother with it-"

"**DON'T- SAY- 'IT'!!** HE'S A PERSON **GODDAMMIT!!** WHY CAN'T YOU PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THAT?!"

Remus glanced at the ground and slowly picked up a rock "_If I can get it to land behind them…_"

"It is a werewolf! Are you so foolish you do not know what such creatures are capable of?! Do they teach you nothing at that school?!"

Just as Sirius was about to answer there was a sounded behind the centaurs. Everyone turned to the noise and Bren whipped his bow out with an arrow and held it out defensively "Show yourself!" he shouted.

The moment he turned, Remus grabbed Sirius' arm "Run!" and they both took off.

Bren and the other looked as they ran, pulled out arrows and fired.

"Quick, do zigzags in the tress, it'll make it harder for them to shoot us!" Remus yelled over the wind, which now roared in their ears as they ran.

Still, Sirius heard and they ran around the trees, arrows flying after them with the clip clopping of hooves behind them. There was a sharp gasp that almost made Sirius turn around.

But Remus pushed him forward "Don't stop! Keep running!"

They ran until their feet were sore. Remus' cloak got caught in some tree branches; he quickly untied it and kept running, just as an arrow hit the back off it. The rain seemed to be falling harder then ever as they ran. When Hagrid's hut came into view the arrows stopped flying, but they still ran.

Once at the doors they ran in and slammed the doors behind them. They were just a bit away before they finally stopped for a chance to breath. Sirius grabbed a stitch in his side "Th-that…was…close…"

Before Remus could answer there was a screech in the hall behind them that nearly made them both jump "MUD!!! WHO'S BEEN TRACKING MUD AT THIS HOUR?!?!"

It was Filch.

"Cloak." Both Remus and Sirius said.

Sirius pulled the IC out while Remus took off his shoes.

"Invisible or not our tracks aren't." he muttered.

Both carried their shoes as they ran blindly to the stairs, Filch appeared a bit away.

"Why does he have to know all the secrete passages to?!" Sirius muttered angrily as they took a quick turn in hopes to lose him.

Remus looked around as they went "Looks like the 7th floor…" he whispered.

"And here comes Flitch!"

"-Those damn students…I've got them now! I may be able to use the whips again or lock 'em up by their thumbs!" he cackled.

Remus looked around the hall anxiously.

"_We need an empty room! Somewhere Filch can't find us and doesn't know about! A secrete place!_" he thought desperately.

Just as suddenly as the thoughts came to him a door way appeared in a wall and Remus turned to it.

"Quick, in there!" he said, pushing Sirius into the room and slamming the door behind them. Once inside Remus put his ear to the door and strained his ear to hear what was going on outside.

"Hm…where are they?! I heard a door slam! Grrr…must be around somewhere…think they can fool me?! HA! I'll show them! I'll patrol this hallway ALL NIGHT if I have to!"

Remus groaned and put his hands through his hair angrily "Great! Just…perfect! No wands, no magic…Filch roaming the halls! Well get comfortable Sirius because we're probably gonna have to sleep here! Ugh…if only there was a cot or something…we need a bed of some kind!"

Just as he said that some candles in the back of the room flickered on; reveling a bed big enough for at least 5 people.

Remus blinked "Wow…that was…convenient…"

Sirius chuckled, sat at the edge and started wringing his cloak out "I'll say. I'm surprised the IC didn't get soaked too! That was a close- OW! Hey!"

"YOU IDIOT!!" No longer being in danger of death or expulsion, Remus suddenly remembered their situation and threw one of his muddy shoes at him.

"WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Angering those centaurs…YOU ALMOST GOT US KILLED!!" he shouted.

Sirius ducked the other incoming shoe then looked up angrily to argue but one look at Remus made his anger melt away. He nearly jumped to his feet "Rem…you're hurt!"

This was the first time since the forest he'd actually looked at Remus. He was soaked from head to toe in his pajamas, shivering and holding his left shoulder with his right hand, covering up his bleeding.

But Remus wasn't moved by his concern "It's just a scratch and don't chance the subject! You know what they're like, why didn't you just keep your big mouth shut?!"

Sirius frowned "They shouldn't have said that stuff about you! They don't even know you!"

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT! Sirius, they're just words! Don't you think I'm use to that by now?! There's no hiding it! When I'm older that's all I'll EVER hear and you think getting in fights about it is gonna make it any better?! I probably won't be able to get a JOB! Shunned! Don't you think…I should be…u-used to words like that by now?!" he shouted, though his voice faltered slightly.

Deep down, he knew he'd never 'get used to it' but he wasn't about to break down again, he'd had enough of those for one night and besides, this was about telling Sirius off, not his own problems.

Sirius frowned "You didn't seem so use to it a moment ago…fact, it sound like it really tore you up inside."

Remus sighed "Of course it does…but you shouldn't just act on your emotions! That's really stupid! We almost died! You just have to put up a good front and pretend it doesn't hurt you! I do it all the time anyway…"

It was silent for a LONG while after that.

Sirius stared at Remus for a long time but Remus just couldn't meet his eyes.

"Take off your shirt." Sirius said suddenly.

Remus looked up in so much alarm his eyebrows nearly got lost in his hair.

Sirius gave him an almost annoyed look "I need to look at your shoulder."

He nodded slowly "Yeah…course…"

Still shivering he unbuttoned his pajama top and sat at the edge of the bed next to Sirius. Sirius looked closely at the gash that was still bleeding. The arrow didn't pierce through all the way by the looks of it and it missed the bone completely. He moved Remus arm up and down and to both sides, making him wince slightly.

"Hmmm…doesn't look too bad…hold on, I'll look for a first aid kit." Sirius said, getting up.

Remus nodded but stayed seated. He wasn't lying about his injury either. Compared to the things that usually resulted of the full moon, it was like a scratch and nothing more. But what was on his mind at the moment was this place. He glanced around the room that had to have been the most peculiar room he'd ever seen. It was pretty plain but when he thought he'd need a table one seemed to almost appear from nowhere.

Remus squinted "What is this…?" he wondered aloud.

However, his wonderings were stopped when he heard Sirius returning. A small smile was on his face as he held up a little box with a red cross, "Found one." he murmured.

Remus scooted over so he could sit next to him. Sirius smiled at the gesture and as he sat he opened the kit. There were all sorts of band-aids, poison antidotes and more. But Sirius reached for a sort of ointment that he put on Remus' shoulder. Remus bit down on his lip to keep from making a noise of pain.

"It'll slow, if not stop, the bleeding." Sirius said.

Once the ointment was rubbed in well, Sirius bandaged up his shoulder completely with some dressing.

"Thanks…" Remus muttered.

Sirius nodded and silence returned once more.

Remus kept himself occupied by rubbing his shoulder though he could feel Sirius' eyes on him. He still felt stupid and embarrassed for breaking down back there…what could he say to Sirius now?

The silence seemed endless as both seemed to be trapped in their own thoughts.

"…Here…you need it more then I do." Sirius said suddenly.

Remus looked back to see Sirius had taken his dry shirt off and was holding it out to him.

"…Put your shirt on." He murmured.

Sirius gave a sort of smile and put it over his shoulders "No, you look ready to freeze to death."

Remus was about to object but stopped himself "_What's the point, he won't listen…_" he thought. He forced a smile and accepted the shirt "Thanks."

Sirius nodded.

Ringing silence…

"I meant it you know." Sirius whispered.

Remus looked away and closed his eyes, knowing all to well what Sirius was referring to, "_But that's just it…I know you didn't…_"

Sirius ran a hand through his own hair "I mean…all I said…I love you."

Remus frowned "Sirius-"

"No I did. I really meant it and…and I still mean now. You say you're sad about being alone, well…you're not now. I'm with you." He said, meeting him straight in the eyes.

The intensity in his eyes made Remus almost swallow his tongue.

"I want to be with…I want to make you smile…I really love you Rem…" he said softly.

It took Remus a moment to find his voice to speak.

"_Remember, this isn't him, it's the potion! Don't fall for it!_" he told himself determinedly.

With that thought firmly in mind, he broke eye contact "Sirius please…I'm cold, let's just go to bed…." he muttered.

But before he could so much as move a muscle he was pin to the bed with Sirius' lip on his. Sirius shirt had fallen and the owner lay in between his open legs, his hips rubbing slightly against Remus' inner thigh.

Sirius pulled back and looked longingly at his face "Then…let me keep you warm…" he whispered.

Remus stared at him for a moment "But…the rule-"

"I swear; we won't go all the way."

Remus couldn't move. Well, that's actually not correctly put. He COULD move, Sirius wasn't holding him down with extreme force or anything, but part of him wouldn't LET himself move.

Sirius brushed some of his graying hair from his face "I swear…if I do anything you don't like, tell me to back off and I give you my word I will…"

Remus looked at him apprehensively "…You swear?"

"By all the chocolate in Honeydukes." He said with a smile.

"_No, no, NO! SNAP OUT OF IT!! TELL HIM TO GET OFF!!_" his mind shouted but his body didn't want to obey it. He'd never been in such a situation as this and though he was slightly afraid, he was more curious to what would happen next…

"_Well…he **did** swear…_" a small voice argued with the screaming logic in his head.

He stared at those gray eyes that were filled with anticipation…and just like that, the logic disappeared and he wanted nothing more then to give into what Sirius meant…he gave a slight nod of his head, words failing him.

Sirius smiled and no more words needed to be said.

He kissed Remus' lips once more, only not as softly. This kiss was overflowing with passion and a sort of hunger that Remus did not pull away from. Even if he could, he won't. He'd never felt a kiss like this, it was electrifying he actually kissed back. Sirius hands seemed to have minds of their own and roamed over Remus' bare chest. He gasped in surprise as one hand reached his waistline but made no objection to what it did. Remus closed his eyes and groaned into the kiss and couldn't hide his disappointment when the hand was pulled away. Sirius broke their kiss and looked him in the eyes "You're really beautiful…"

He kissed his lips once more but only for a moment before moving down to his jaw-line and then to his neck. Remus ran a hand through Sirius' black hair as a sort of encouragement to his actions, all sense forgotten. Forgetting that he'd drunk a potion, that it wasn't really him doing this and the fact that he wasn't gay. None of the things he'd been arguing with himself mattered now. As Sirius looked at his torso he noticed the many different scars. Scratches, bite marks…he kissed each one, wanting to take the pain out of them. As he reached the middle, Sirius' hands went to work taking off Remus' pajama bottoms, meeting no resistance as he did so. Sirius stopped at his bellybutton and looked up at him "This is your last chance, if you want me to stop and we can pretend this never happened, say so now."

Remus looked down at him expectedly, annoyed even "Stop acting like you're going to give me a choice!"

Sirius chuckled but an evil idea came to his mind. "Lets see how long I can drag this out…" he thought deviously to himself and he kissed Remus' lower stomach, now gripping his hips firmly and moving lower so his knees were on the floor.

Remus' breathing went uneven as Sirius' kisses got lower and lower. "Uh…please…" he murmured, lifting himself up slightly. Sirius, however, didn't seem to hear his wanting whisper and trailed off course. He moved his kisses to Remus' inner thigh, his cheek barely brushing against his growing manhood. Remus gripped the bed sheets "Ahh…S-Sirius…don't tease me…!" he moaned.

Sirius looked up with a grin "Aw, but where's the fun if I don't?" as he said this one of his hands snaked its way back down and gently rubbed Remus' balls making him arch his back "Ahhh! Sirius!" He smiled but went on ignoring his pleas and kissed his thighs and every now and again coming close to the prize, but never quite touching it. Remus bucked his hips impatiently "Siriuuuus!" he all but whined.

Sirius smirked and gently ran his tongue from the top to the hilt. Remus bit so hard into his lip he thought it might bleed "Oh god…" he knew Sirius was loving every minute of this. Watching him writhe and beg him for more, but he didn't care, dignity was too far gone all he wanted was this…he needed it now and was willing to stoop to any lengths to get it.

He put his hand on the back of Sirius head and tried to force him to it but he resisted the force on his head and licked his thigh. "Ahhh! Sirius, please! God I can't take it!" he whimpered. Sirius grinned devilishly, "Well, what is it? Spit it out! What do- you- want?" as he said the last part he kissed closer and closer to Remus' hardened area.

Remus panted slightly "I…please…just…you know…please!" Sirius licked his leg "Sorry, don't know what you're talking about…I won't know what you want till you say it…come one Rem, say it. Tell me what you want…" he said in an evil sing-song ish tone. Remus took a sharp breath "Uh, p-please…ugh…" he felt completely embarrassed but knew Sirius was just going to torture him until he said it "Ohhh…argh…S-suck my cock!" Sirius grinned and, quite abruptly, took Remus into his mouth. As the wetness surrounded him, he couldn't fight back a groan of pleasure.

Sirius sucked his erection vehemently and moaned occasionally, sending vibration all through Remus' being. He closed his eyes and ran his hands through Sirius' hair once more. Sirius ran his tongue over him and gently grazed Remus with his teeth nearly making him shout. As he got more comfortable, Remus responded to the action by pressing himself lightly up against Sirius' mouth. Such a feeling had never passed by him before as this went on. Instinct took over and he knew to brace himself as a rush began growing in his lower body. The unknown feeling frightened him in a way, yet he couldn't explain how he wanted it so badly.

He pushed himself more firmly to Sirius' lips "Ah…S-S-Sirius…can't…gonna…" he panted, the rush seemed to flood his being as he gripped Sirius' hair roughly. With one particularly hard suck Remus' could hold back no longer and came with a sort of yelp. Sirius did not pull away when he did. Though gagging slightly, he swallowed.

They stayed like that for a moment. Remus absentmindedly stroked Sirius' head, trying to level his breathing and comprehend what had just happened while Sirius licked the remaining cum from Remus' tip.

Soft kisses to his side, then chest told Remus Sirius was pulling himself back on the bed. He was too tired to think, too tired to feel anything other then the soft, loving kisses to his bare flesh. He willed Sirius to lead him to the top of the bed and under the covers (though now the room felt unusually steamy and the need for the blankets were unknown to him). He made no objection when Sirius put his arms around him and pulled him close, his mind was too full, too empty…too tired to argue. It was all he could do to keep himself conscious long enough to hear Sirius whisper:

"I love you…" and gently kiss his forehead before drifting off into a deep sleep.

End A/N: Phew! What a long chapter eh? So, whaddya guys think? I kid you not, this was my first real yaoi thing so if it's completely horrible, I'll understand. I usually don't make guys cry in my fics but you know, if you find your best friend's body all bloody and you covered in their blood and DON'T cry, I think you have SERIOUS issues…that's wrong. So, I don't think it was girly to have Remus cry at that part. Anyone wanna argue about that, hey, I'm here. Thanks for reading; next chapter things get more interesting, stay tuned!


	9. Chapter 9

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Yaaaaay! I'm so glad you all enjoyed last chapter. Sorry it took so long for me to update though, there were visitors this weekend and as a host, it's rude to be on the computer and not entertain your guest, you know? But, I'm here now! And I thank you all for your wonderful reviews and patience, so now, chapter 9!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it really bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, it is called fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.)

**Chapter 9**

It took Remus a moment to remember where he was and why he was naked with Sirius, their arms and legs intertwined, as his mind seemed to be still asleep. Once he had though, it was all he could do to keep from letting out a yell of surprise.

Instead, he untangled himself from Sirius and went to the far end of the bed (which was pretty far) and clung to the sheets as though his life depended on it.

He sudden movement made Sirius wake up "Hm? Oh…(Yaaawn), mornin' Rem…" he murmured blearily, his eyes barely opened. He let out a huge yawn and forced himself to sit up.

Remus gave him a bewildered stare as he went about so casually "Erm…w-we should go back to the dorm now. If we're lucky everyone'll still be asleep and no one'll notice we were gone.

Sirius scratched his head tiredly and nodded "Kay…I'll get the cloak."

Remus waited until his back was turned to get out from the safety of the blankets and quickly pulled on his pants. He shivered when he did though; they were still a bit damp.

Once both were dressed they carried their shoes in hand, put the IC over themselves and headed back to Gryffindor tower.

As they walked, Remus couldn't help but look over at Sirius, who appeared to be sleepwalking almost. Flashes of what had taken place last night made his face burn.

He looked away from Sirius and tried to get a grip on himself "_Stop acting stupid!_" he thought angrily.

They made their way back without any confrontations and luck was on their side, no one was up yet so they successfully snuck back into their dorm with no one a wiser.

The first thing Sirius did when they entered was to take off the cloak and stuff it into James' trunk.

"Welp…" he yawned "by the look of it we'll probably be able to get another hour sleep, give or take." Remus nodded wordlessly as he cleaned the mud off their shoes.

Once he put the shoes down he turned to go to his bed but stopped in his tracks when Sirius came up to him. Sirius didn't even have his eyes open, just sort of sleepwalked over to him and gave him a soft kiss on his lips before murmuring a soft "G'night." then went back down on his bed as though he'd never woken up to begin with.

Remus stayed rooted in his spot, his face a bright red. He shook his head "Stop that." and went to his bed as well. However, the tiredness of before had vanished completely as he lay in his bed.

He kept thinking about the night before and then telling himself not too.

'_I can't believe you just took advantage of your best friend!_' a voice in his head muttered reproachfully.

'I took advantage? If anything HE'S the one who took advantage!' he whispered angrily to himself.

'_Oh don't give me that! He can't help it and you know he can't! But you, you have free will, you should've told him NO!_'

'_It did feel good though…REAL good…_' a completely different voice chimed in.

Remus covered his ears though he knew it did know good "Don't say that! I'm not gay. What happened before was…an accident! It was a heat of the moment thing only! Just…stop thinking about it!" he told himself as he ran over the scene once more in his mind.

Though he tried to keep it out of his head, it was the last thought he had before his eyes closed…

(I picture that last scene as the classic 'angel on one shoulder, devil on the other.' You can decide which was which for yourself. )

---

It felt like only two seconds of rest when James prodded him in the side "Rem…hey Rem, you awake?"

Remus groaned and tried to bury his face in his pillow "No."

He poked his head roughly "Come on Rem, get up! Tell me what happened! Did Sirius make it up to you? He said he would…but he didn't say what he'd do, just that it was something special."

Remus didn't dare lift his face, not wanting to betray his embarrassment. At James' first question he felt heat rise to his face and was certain he was red in the face '_Oh yeah, he made it up to me alright and boy__ was it special…_'

He tried to suffocate himself after that last thought.

James poked him one more time before giving up "Fine, don't tell me, I don't care. Well at least get up so we can go to the Great Hall for breakfast then!"

At that Remus got up, he wasn't falling asleep anyway. As he got up though, he noticed Peter and Sirius' beds still had their occupants in them. He frowned, "Hey! Why'd you just wake me up?!"

James smirked "Well for one, I wanted to know what that idiot over there tried to do for you this time and what injury you managed to get out of it." Remus frowned at his joke but allowed him to continue "Don't get me wrong though, I tried to get him up and ask him. Peter had to do his Transfiguration essay and last I saw he didn't go to bed till 4. Felt kinda sorry for him so I'll just let him sleep and as for Sirius, well…it's like the guy had a dose of Draught of Living Death or something! I tried everything to get him up! Course, I think he's had enough potions, don't you?" he sniggered.

Remus gave him a look "That's not funny."

James grinned, "Ah! I'm only jokin' Rem! Come on, let's take a shower then head on down to the Great Hall."

He nodded and bent over his trunk to get his things and as he did, a thought came to his head "_Hm…ok, we're going to the showers, this'll be a test! And it'll prove once and for all that I am 100 percent NOT gay!_"

As Remus and James made their way to the showers hardly anyone paid them any mind. It seemed they had better things to gossip about today rather then Remus' love life, a sign today might be a good day!

James opened the door and they both walked in. It was sort of like a gym's locker room only there were individual stalls for everyone to shower in. It was as loud and as noisy as ever as everyone waited and took turns with the stalls.

Remus looked around at the rest who waited with towels wrapped around their waists and to his relief he didn't feel…anything! One guy was even dared to come in stark naked from the dormitories and (though girl screams came from outside) as he came in, Remus still felt nothing. Not arousal, not disgust…nothing! In fact, the only thought that came to his head was the guy was an idiot for doing it for only 9 Galleons. He wouldn't have done it for any less then 90!

He smiled inwardly "_HA! Told you! Not gay!_"

With a new spring in his step he went to wait for a shower stall as well. He, along with everyone else, waited with a towel around the waist for the person ahead to be finished.

"Holy…Rem, what happened to your shoulder?!" James exclaimed, looking at him for the first time.

Remus looked at his bandaged shoulder, which a little of the blood and seep though and inwardly groaned "_Crap…I forgot about that…_"

"Oh um…nothing. It's nothing!" He said when he noticed it got a bit less noisy when James had said that. He cast James a look that clearly said 'I'll tell you later' and he let the subject drop.

Other then that little attention grabber, Remus felt the morning was fairly ok…that is, until he heard James say "Whoa! And here I thought you were dead! So, decided to join the living, eh Sirius?"

Remus slowly turned, not wanting once again to be the center of attention. Sirius, with Peter at his side, punched James playfully in the arm "Nah, I'm an Inferi just out for a stroll." He said, causing a few people to laugh.

Remus felt his heart hammer madly in his chest and found himself staring at Sirius…his long black hair, toned body, his lean figure and the white towel around his waist that covered-

The instant the person in front of him got out of the stall Remus ran in, slammed the door, threw off his towel and turned the cold water on full blast without even touching the hot.

He bit his lip to keep in any shouts he might have made at the sudden cold that felt like a whip on his back. '_Not gay huh?_' a voice said cheekily in his head. He groaned and hit his head on the wall "Damn…"

For a moment he just stood like that, his head to the wall while getting use to the water, when a bit of white from the corner of his eye caught his attention. He looked at his shoulder that he'd forgotten to take the bandages off.

With an exasperated sigh, he unraveled them and hung them on the stall with his towel. He washed himself quickly, shut off the water and wrapped the towel around him again, picking up the bandages in haste.

All he wanted was to get out of the shower, eat some breakfast and get as far away from Sirius as possible. He opened the door and nearly knocked Peter down in his hurry to leave.

"Sorry." He muttered and headed off to change cloths.

Peter blinked "Um…s'ok! Whaddya think that was about?" he muttered to James and Sirius who were behind him.

Both shrugged and he walked into the unused stall.

"AHH!" he jumped back out with his towel almost as soon as he turned the water on.

James frowned "What's wrong?"

Peter rubbed his shivering arms "Geez! The water's freezing! What was he trying to do, take a shower in ice?"

Sirius glanced back to see Remus scrambling to get his things together as quickly as possible and a small smile came to his lips.

---

Once the rest had finished up in the showers and joined Remus at the Gryffindor table he didn't look up from his eggs but greeted them with a soft "Hey." and continued eating.

"_Just don't look at him! And stop thinking about it…think un-Sirius thoughts! Eat faster! Gotta get out of here…_" he mentally told himself as he kept his eyes on his plate.

James and Peter glanced at Sirius who simply smiled pleasantly and sat down. They gave each other a confused look, silently asking if either knew what that was about…but neither did so they joined Sirius and sat.

Though he didn't look up, they could see the top of his head was slightly pink.

"Hey Rem, you ok?" James asked slowly.

Remus nodded but didn't look up and started shoveling food into his mouth, as if suddenly ravenous. James looked at Peter, his turn.

"Um…the eggs good?" he asked just as cautiously as James.

Again, he nodded but didn't glance at who'd asked.

"Maybe…you'd want something else?" James suggested. He knew that if he got him to look up they'd probably have a better chance of prying what's up with him out of him.

Peter grabbed the closest plate to him and held it out "Sausage?"

He suddenly dropped his fork with a loud CLUNK and damn near choked. He quickly looked up and, in that brief moment his eyes meet with Sirius' who said nothing but kept the same pleasant smile on his face, though, at meet Remus' eyes he raised his eyebrows.

The pink on his face went straight to red like a color wheel. He looked down, grabbed his bag and murmured something about going somewhere and dashed out the door before anyone could say anything.

Sirius chuckled softly and pulled a plate of food to him.

Peter and James looked at him with equally confused and curious looks "What was that about?"

He didn't answer right away, took his time chewing his food before saying "He's so adorable sometimes. Toast anyone? Ah, I think I'll have one of those sausages, thanks Peter." (A/N: you would! HAHAHA!)

James and Peter looked at each other, completely bemused.

---

Remus hit his head with his hand "Bad brain, bad brain!" he wasn't even paying attention to where he was going, just anywhere that Sirius wasn't would be good. "Stop thinking like that!"

"Password?"

He looked up; his feet had taken him to the Fat Lady "Hm? Oh, oddsbokin."

She let him in and he blindly walked up to his dorm.

Once there he still walked, more paced really, trying to convince himself that this wasn't happening. "I'm not gay! I…I can't be! I mean…maybe…maybe its just Sirius; I didn't feel like that to any other guys…"

'_Maybe you're bi._' The helpful little voice from before said.

"A lot of good that does! Is that really any better?!"

'_Well sort of. I mean, people don't pick on you as much if you like both._'

"Thanks, that really helps! No…there's got to be…I mean…"

'_Well what's the big deal? So you're attracted to Sirius, it's not the end of the world!_'

"It IS a big deal! He's not himself, he doesn't mean all those things and falling for all the fake stuff he says doesn't help me at all! No, I can't like Sirius. Once the antidote's done he'll be back to normal and where will that leave me!?"

'_…_'

"Exactly! I'm setting myself up for heartbreak! No, I don't…and even if I do, I won't! I won't let myself fall into this trap! He doesn't mean it…no matter how real it sounds Sirius doesn't love me…"

'_But that doesn't mean you don't love him_'

"I DON'T!"

'_Don'__t you? Don't lie to yourself__! You haven't felt like this since Sara-Su! You never told her how you felt and it still eats at you sometimes!_'

Remus frowned "She was different…she had her own choice but Sirius doesn't! James is right; a love potion is low and underhanded! No, even if I do, WHICH I'M NOT SAYING I DO!! But…if I do love Sirius, then I want him to choose me…not the potion."

'_True, but for now, take in the benefit of it! This might be your only chance to be with Sirius and not get ridiculed for it! Anything you do together you can blame on the potion!_'

"No! I'm not taking advantage of Sirius like that! He's going to remember everything once they give him the antidote and can you imagine what he'd say to me once he up from it?!"

'_I can because you can…things like 'betrayal' 'thought you were my friend' 'how could you take advantage of me'…all that sort of thing really._'

"Exactly…which is why, I must stay away from him."

'_But you love him!_'

"Even **IF** that's true, I can't be with him. I'll only be hurting myself…"

'_Come on! Maybe…if you wait till the antidote's made then you could ask him, not the potion, but ask Sirius what he thinks of you…_'

"Yeah right! Sirius' is as straight as a broomstick handle! No, he wouldn't want me…not when he can have his pick of any girl in the school."

'_But don't you wonder then WHY he's never gone out with any of them?_'

"He told me why! A girl broke his heart and he's still hung over HER!"

'_Well did you ever think maybe you could catch him on the rebound? Be a friend to comfort him but turn out to be something more?_'

"You know what; I'm not talking to you anymore about this! The matter is closed, I don't love Sirius and I won't fawn over him in hopes he might actually love me because I know he doesn't!"

That seemed enough to silence the voice in his head he was arguing with and he lay back on his bed. He sighed rubbed his eyes "Ohhh…what'd I do to deserve this mess?" he muttered.

He yawned; maybe he'd be able to take a nap before the next class, considering he didn't sleep nearly at all last night. However, his thoughts of a nap were tarnished when the door opened "Rem? You in here?"

It was James.

Remus clenched his teeth angrily, though calmly he said "James do you have this sense that _tells _you when I'm trying to go to sleep and the impulse that sends you to wake me up?"

James blinked "Er…no…people heard you yelling from downstairs…I just, wanted to see if you were ok…"

He sat up at that "Right…well, I did say I'd tell you about it later…" he muttered, thinking this was about his shoulder "Turns out you were right. Sirius tried to make up for the water thing by taking me to a spot in the forbidden forest. I told him once my favorite place to live was there so he thought I'd enjoy the sight there and…well, lets just say there were some centaurs who-"

James jumped back in surprise "Wait, what? Centaurs?! You got in a scrap with centaurs?!? Are you guys out of your minds?!"

"Sirius is. He's the one that got 'em all worked up! They probably would've let us go peacefully if he'd just kept his big mouth shut for a change…" Remus muttered.

James ran a hand through his hair "Geez…you know I was just kiddin' this morning, I…I didn't really think you'd gotten hurt again…you ok?"

"Fine, it's just a scratch…Really." He added when James gave him a skeptical look "I've done worse to myself on full moons. Still, I'm surprised that's all that happened. Pick a fight with centaurs in the middle of the night with no wands…I'm surprised we didn't die!"

James nodded "Yeah…so why'd he pick a fight? Normally centaurs 'll leave you alone if you do."

Remus' face went slightly pink-ish again "Well…they knew, I wasn't…entirely human…" every time he said 'not' human he usually ended up getting a lecture on how he WAS human and completely normal.

He sighed, "I don't know how they knew but when they saw me they said…some things…you know, the usual stuff I should already be used to by now about…my condition. But Sirius…well you know how he is in this state!"

"Oh…I see…" James said slowly.

For a moment neither said anything more about it.

Slowly James sat down at his own bed that was across from Remus' "Well, that's all great and stuff but, I was actually asking about earlier in the Great Hall. What was that all about?"

At once his face went to the deep red it once was "I-I-I…it's nothing…" he mumbled.

James gave him a look "Oh yes, you always run out on breakfast like a manic then?"

"It's nothing." Remus repeated, though slightly more forcefully.

James shrugged "Ok, if you say so. But remember, I'm here if you wanna talk mate."

Remus nodded "Yeah, I know. Well, we better head on to class then right?"

---

The rest of the day was no better. If Sirius were so much as mentioned in a sentence, Remus would go brick red and try to change the subject. As embarrassed as he was by the other night, it didn't stop him from thinking about it, among other things:

'_For being 'straight as a broomstick handle' he was actually pretty good at that…_'

"Shut up…" Remus muttered.

'_I never would've guessed he was so good with his mouth-_'

He grabbed the sides of his head "Would you PLEASE shut up!?"

'_Imagine what mom would say…_'

That thought made him stop in the middle of the hall, where he was alone. He released his head and his eyes widened "Mom…?"

He groaned and covered his eyes "Oh no! I didn't even stop to think! My poor mother…a gay werewolf for a son! Argh! How could I do that to her? After all the time she spends standing up for me and telling my dad off, now, I just proved him right! What am I gonna do?"

'_Oh stop being dramatic! You know mum, she'd never agree with JOHN! She loves ya!_'

"Yes, but that was BEFORE I disgraced the family…first a werewolf, now this! How much patience can one woman have?"

'_Just talk to her! I'm sure you're freaking out over nothing. Trust me!_'

Remus frowned "Trust YOU?! Last time I trusted you I-"

'_Had a wonderful night you'll never forgot?_'

"More like had a night I'm still TRYING to forget…" Remus scowled.

'_Right.__ You know you liked it!_'

"Of course I did, my BODY enjoyed it, but me? No! To me, it's called 'taking advantage of your unstable friend'!"

'_Ok, ok! Look, just send an owl to her, you'll see._'

Remus sighed "I…alright…I'll, I'll send her an owl but not right now."

So, as soon as he had a free hour he ran to the Owlery and grabbed a school owl.

"Ok…so, what should I say?" he muttered as he pulled out a quill and parchment. He bit the tip of his quill for a moment then put it to the parchment.

Dear mother-

"No…that sounds a bit formal…"

Hiya mum-

"But it's not that casual either!" he groaned, "Ok…let's…try getting to the point…"

'Mum, there's something I need to know. It's important so please, answer me honestly…'

He paused for a moment and looked up thoughtfully, trying to put everything into words that he wanted to ask.

'…You'd still care for me, no matter what I might do, right? I don't want to disappoint you, tell me if there's anything I could do that might so I could know not to do it, and mom, could you please tell me the truth? I'll be waiting for it.

Love,

Remus'

He reread it and, after deciding it was good enough tied it to the leg of the owl and sent it out the window. He watched it go pass the forbidden forest and turn into a speck in the sky.

Remus sighed, "I hope…I'm not any more of a disappointment to you…"

End A/N: Sigh, ah that's Remus for you. I'll admit, not one of my best chapters, but I had to write it and you'll see why soon. You wanna know what happens next, you best review!


	10. Chapter 10

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Sorry for the wait! Siblings can be annoying huh? Especially when they hog the computer for hours! I hope there are still people out there reading and whoever's around, thanks! So, without further ado, I present chapter 10!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it really bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, it is called fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.)

**Chapter 10**

Once the owl was out of sight, he stuffed his quill and his parchment back in his robes and, just as he was about to head back out he heard footsteps, about 5 people it sounded like and that alone was enough to make him turn around.

It was a group of boys, all laughing about something but stopping dead at the sight of him. The apparently leader of their group stepped forth and snarled, "It's you!"

Remus stepped back in surprise "Me?"

"Yeah…you're the love potion bloke! We 'ere just talkin' 'bout you…" he said, coming closer. His little gang mimicked him and started to in circle Remus.

He took another step back "That was an- (sigh) look, just…let me pass, I haven't done anything to you!"

"Shut up!" the leader suddenly lunged forward and pinned him to the back wall.

Remus stared at him; he was an enormous guy, much bigger then him with his gaunt figure. This boy was almost a gorilla with his huge arms, flat nose and beady eyes that were glaring at him furiously.

Remus bit the inside of his mouth "_Dammit! Perfect time to leave my wand upstairs!_" he thought as the group now surrounded them. He tried to think of how to talk out of this, seeing as their difference in size would make a fist fight uneven, when the gorilla-boy spoke.

"We don't like yer kind around here…" he breathed angrily, but it was what he added at the end that stopped Remus thought process, "…fagot…"

Remus glared back it him, all too aware of how small he was compared to him "Don't call me that! I'm not gay! It was an accident and if you had more than one brain cell you'd know that!" he said before he could stop himself.

To his surprise the group laughed; a horrible, mocking laugh. The gorilla kid turned back to him "You got guts…don't see much of that in you fruits huh…well, lets see how they look on the outside then, eh?"

However, before anyone could so much as breath, a raspy voice said "WHAT ARE YOU KIDS DOIN' UP THERE?! CAN'T YOU LOT READ?! I PUT UP A SIGN 'NO ONE IN THE OWLERY TILL 7 PM!' FIXIN' THE HOLE IN THE ROOF BUT OH, THE HEAD MASTER'LL LOVE TO SEE YOU ALL!"

One of the gang gasped "It's Filch!"

"Let's get outta here!"

The gorilla looked around as his friends ran out the back way then looked back at Remus "You got lucky this time fag…" and slammed his head in the wall behind him "but believe me, you won't be so lucky next time…" he muttered before joining his friends.

Remus rubbed the back of his head. No blood, but that did leave a big bump. Never had he been so happy to hear Filch, who cares if he was about to get in trouble, at least he wasn't dead!

However, once more, the unexpected happened. Instead of hearing Filch's insane-ish muttering about torturing students coming up the steps, there was a moment's pause before he saw the top of a boy's head peek over the edge of the platform "…Are they gone?" he whispered.

Remus blinked "Um, yeah?"

"Ah good!" the other boy said happily, now dropping his worried whisper and hopping up to him.

He had a bowl like hair cut in his brown-blond hair and striking green eyes. He smiled cheerfully and held a hand out to help Remus to his feet. Remus stared at him in surprise before accepting the help.

"Whew, quite a lot this time eh? Oh, let me introduce myself, I'm Tim McCannon. Timmy if you like. Boy, that Filch impression gets 'em every time!" he made a face and yelled "'NO DUNG BOMBS IN THE HALLWAYS!!!'" almost in an exact vision of Filch's rasping voice.

Remus stared at him, still completely baffled as he laughed about the stupidity of other.

He slowly shook of the confusion and remember his manners "Yes…um, well, thanks for that. I'd forgotten to take my wand with me when I came up-"

"Oh well, can't have that. Not with people like 'em walkin' about!" Tim said cheerfully still.

He seemed to be a very cheery person and the smile he wore seemed to make him very rosy cheeked. Once on his feet, Remus and Tim walked out of the Owlery together.

"Er, yeah…I'm Remus by the way." He said, forgetting he didn't say his name back.

Tim grinned, "I know you alright! Who doesn't?"

Remus frowned "Oh right…I forgot, I'm Hogwarts latest gossip victim…"

Tim patted him on the back "Ah no worries! Personally, we all respect you for it. A bit underhanded but worth it I bet! Genius man, genius!"

Remus raised an eyebrow "We? We who?"

Tim smiled "You know, us! People like us I mean. Oh and don't worry about them, we've all got your back. I mean, we gotta stick up for our own eh?"

Remus still looked confused but didn't say anything as Tim continued.

"Can't even begin to say how lucky you are…Sirius Black! Ha! You've got some serious nerve; we revere you for that one!" Tim said happily "I mean everyone's got their eye on him! He's got a nice arse, eh? I'm surprised no one's done the potion thing sooner! It's brilliant!"

Slow realization dawned on Remus as he listened to Tim babble happily.

"Now, you and me are friends now right? Good, so you can be honest with me, right?" he asked.

Remus couldn't answer, his voice snagged in his throat, but Tim didn't seem to notice and went on "Right. Ok, so be honest…what's he like in bed? You have gone all the way with him right? And you, you've actually gotten a look at the goods! Ha, you get a pat on the back for that one!"

A look of horror was plastered on Remus face, as he went red, "_No…way…_"

Tim seemed to notice his silence now and asked, "Hey, are you ok?"

Remus didn't answer, instead he ran straight across the field and to the castle, not caring who or what he ran into, just running as far away as possible, trying to run out of this horrible nightmare that turned out to be his life.

"_One of their own?!__ But I'm not! I'M NOT GAY!!!_" he thought as he went.

Those boys who attacked him for that reason, the one who saved him, for that reason! Was that all he was now?! Since when did everything that happened to you depend on your sexual orientation?!?

---

James and Peter walked ahead to lunch "So where'd Remus disappear to now?" James asked.

Peter shrugged "I dunno. He said he was goin' to the Owlery real quick and he didn't come back after."

James frowned "That's unusual…"

As they walked in they noticed there was someone at their end of the table…it was Remus! And…he appeared to be trying to drown himself in his soup?

"Um, Rem…you ok?" James said, pulling him up right.

Remus looked dreadfully pale and seemed sick "…No James, I'm not…"

Peter stared at him in surprise "Blimey! Remus what happened to you?!"

He didn't answer right away; he took a deep breath then asked slowly "Have I ever done anything truly bad? I mean REALLY bad?"

Both his friends stared at him "Um…what do you mean?"

"Anything bad enough…to deserve…this…torture…" he muttered and went back to his soup.

After a long while, Peter and James were able to prod what had happened a while ago in the Owlery out of him.

"…You know, now that I think about it, it's a lot like being a werewolf…there's some who like you, tons that don't and more that just want you dead! Only this is worse, far worse…" Remus murmured after he'd finished telling them.

Peter tilted his head in confusion "How?"

He looked up "…At least as a werewolf you can threaten to bite them!"

James whistled "Wow…that's rough mate…so they think you're 'one of them' then?"

"Yeah…dammit this isn't fair! I…what am I gonna do?" he buried his face in his arms.

As if on cue for a bad movie, Sirius came up and sat next to Remus "Hey." He said cheerfully.

Remus lifted his face but put it back once he saw who it was "Oh god…"

A concerned look came to Sirius' face "Hey are you ok? Does you stomach hurt? Fever?" he lifted Remus' head and put his hand to his forehead.

Just as he did this a group passed them, Tim was walking amongst them. He smiled his cheery smile, waving to him as he passed their table "Hey Remus!" and winked as he left.

Remus banged his head on the table "Why…me?!" then sat very still.

Sirius looked in alarm at James and Peter but they too stared at their friend in surprise. Slowly Remus got to his feet and held his head that pounded painfully from the strikes it just took "I…I'm gonna go…"

Sirius made to follow but James shot him a look that told him to stay seated as Remus left. Once he was gone Sirius rounded on the other two "Alright, what's going on?" he demanded.

Peter and James exchanged looks "Oh…well…he's just…havin' a bit of trouble…with people…" Peter said slowly.

Sirius frowned "Is he alright? What do you mean?"

James sighed "Welllll…not everyone likes, you know, the idea of you two…being together, like this…"

Sirius' frowned deepened "Oh, I see…no, I know what you mean, I ran into a group like that on my way here. Trying to pick a fight with me because I'm with Rem…I think they call 'em 'gay bashers' or something like that…they're bugging Remus to?"

Peter nodded "Yeah, he got out of it ok, but now he doesn't feel too good."

Sirius frowned "I'll go talk to him."

"Um, I don't think that's such a good idea at the moment! Here, just let me talk to him." James said hurriedly.

"_After all, it's my fault you guys are in a relationship anyway. Least I can do is __fix__ it…_" he added in his head as he went out the Great Hall.

---

But the rest of that day, no matter how hard he tried to get a hold of Remus, he sat far away from them, seemingly lost in his own thoughts and was the first to bolt out of every class.

James clenched his teeth "Dammit Remus, stop avoiding me!" he muttered angrily, trying to catch up with him as he slipped through the people in the hall for the 4th time.

He pushed his way passed people annoyedly "Get outta the way, midget! Those first years just keep getting smaller…" it was almost as if people were trying to get in his way!

"I said move you- Lily!" he stopped when he spotted red hair amongst all the chattering people.

At her name she turned around and a smile came to her face "Oh, hello James."

James tried to smile but his face didn't listen "Lily, um, hi! Uh…"

A confused look passed her green eyes "Where you off to in such a hurry? Do you need help?"

At that comment his thoughts came back, "No! I mean, I was looking for my friend Remus, I need to talk to him."

"Oh him? Yeah, I feel bad for him, he seems really pale these days, is he alright? I mean, other than…you know, the whole potion thing…" she looked around to as if trying to find him too.

James sighed "Well it's…hard to explain…I mean, he's been asking me for help but I think everything's gone all wrong! And it's all my fault…"

"What do you mean?" she asked, not in a curious way but rather, a concerned way, as if she wanted to help.

James sighed again, only this time with guilt "Well…I told him when Sirius was getting restless just to pretend to like him, you know, so the idiot wouldn't go off and do something stupid. I told Remus just to go along with whatever Sirius said and now…well…I think that's about to backfire…"

Lily nodded "Oh, I see…it's not pretend anymore is it?"

"Well that's- wait what?"

"You know, he started out _pretending_ to like Sirius, but then as they went on together, he actually started to fall for him?"

James blinked "Er, well actually, I was gonna say he's just gettin' bullied for pretending but…what makes you think that?"

Lily rolled her eyes "Oh James, anyone with **eyes** can see that sort of think happening." (Yeah, just look at all the reviews saying that!)

James looked at the ground thoughtfully, he'd never thought of that. Could Remus actually be falling for Sirius? But then why was he complaining about it? And he knew about the potion, he knew everything Sirius said was bologna! Still…what if it were true?

James looked up "Oh no…I gotta go talk to him! If that's true, then he's just setting himself up for disaster!"

Lily made a face "Oh? And just what do you plan to tell him?"

He shrugged "I dunno, something! Anything! I just gotta try talking him out of this before the antidote's ready."

Lily sighed, "Well James, to be honest, if Remus loves Sirius for real, I don't think there's really anything you could do about it."

He frowned, "Whaddya mean? Course there is; there has to be something!"

She frowned back "No, there isn't. I mean, think about it this way, you have feelings for me right? Well, if someone told you not to feel them anymore, would you?"

James paused "…Well…no, I…I don't think I could…"

Lily nodded "Yep and why do you think that?"

He scratched the back of his head nervously "Well…I mean, it's not really anything I can control…"

Again, she nodded "Exactly. See? You can't tell Remus **how** to feel and he can't make himself **not** feel a certain way either. Emotions like that are really just out of our hands."

James slowly nodded "That…makes a lot of sense…" he looked up at Lily "You're way too smart for your own good sometimes Evans."

She shrugged humbly "It's a gift."

However, this did put James in a spot "_What if he does love him?__ What if this stupid ordeal breaks up the Marauders?_" he thought.

---

Remus had gone up to the common room, originally to get some sleep, but also, he just didn't feel like talking about it. If anything, he really wanted to be alone but there were too many people for it. And at least in his sleep, this whole problem disappeared!

However, as tired as he felt, his mind was too full of thoughts to let him get some sleep.

"_How do I get out of this…I can't just 'break it off' with Sirius, he may do something crazy! But if I stay with him any longer and he keeps talking to me with so much fake care and concern and love I…I'm being a total idiot! And what's worse, now I've got people trying to beat me up because of it!_" he thought horribly as he lay in his bed.

He had the argument again and again in his head, but it was always the same:

"_You love him._"

"No I don't."

"_You do._"

"I don't!"

"_You do!_"

"NO, I don't!"

"_Yes, you do!_"

"I SAID I DON'T!!"

And every time, after the argument, he got no closer to what he felt and got more tired then ever! All this mess was just too draining but no matter how often he wished he could rest he just couldn't get to sleep.

---

The next few days were no better for everyone's favorite werewolf as he went about the school.

If anyone was concerned for him it was Sirius, who tried desperately to talk to him, but he too was ditched. Remus kept mostly to himself, he felt sick half the time and didn't know what to do.

As for the people around him, that group he met in the Owlery seemed to be a shadow but were never able to do anything because of the crowds or because a teacher was around.

However, on a Saturday afternoon, there was neither…

Remus tended to go outside and pace the grounds, trying to clear his head and get rid of the ache in his stomach. He didn't seem to notice there was no one around until a harsh voice yelled "Hey fagot!"

He turned quickly on his heel to see the gorilla and his lackeys come up.

The leader cracked his knuckles "No place to hide this time…"

Remus quickly pulled out his wand but a lackey yelled "Expelliarmus!" and it flew 10 feet away. He looked back at them in a panic; there really wasn't a place to hide this time, no Tim to save him either.

So, being completely outnumbered with no possible way of defense, he did the only sensible thing that was embedded in his instincts, he ran for it. As he ran he heard the gorilla over his shoulder yell, "Let's get him!" and heard the running feet behind him. He closed his eyes and coxed himself to go faster.

_**A group of humans, far too many for one wolf alone to take was chasing him, jeering and pointing those strange sticks at his hind legs.**_

A few spells whizzed by his ears and around his ankles but never actually hitting him as he kept running. He knew if he stopped to look back, even for a second, they'd get him.

"_Looks like I was right…_" he thought miserably "_Just like being a werewolf only you're t__he only one who's afraid!_"

His legs were starting to ache and his side began cramping. However, as the pain in his side got to its breaking point, the jeering stopped and the running mob behind him cease to follow. It took a moment for him to realize this but he didn't want to stop running to see what kept them, so he glanced over his shoulder as he ran.

Some were still trying to shoot spells at him but missed because he was to far away. Before he could wonder what had made them stop he was suddenly knocked off his feet.

Remus picked himself off the ground and realized just as a branch was about to knock him in the head, this was the Whomping Willow! He ducked the incoming branch and crawled forward "_If I could just get it in the knot…_" he thought.

He rolled to evade as the tree flung it's trunk to the ground in an attempt to squish him. But even as he made this little progress he was forced back by another branch that hit him in the nose. He got to his feet and stumbled back holding it tight as blood came down but he didn't back away far enough. A second branch a came and got him right in the gut. Winded, he nearly fell over but a third branch got him in the face. Branches from the tree seemed to be everywhere; he could hardly see what was going on! Blood came from a scrape on his forehead and fell over his eye but before he could stagger away from the tree a final branch came and got him right in the head and all became black to him…

---

"Oh Remus…" a voice whispered in concern.

He heard the voice and was tempted to open his eyes to see who was there but couldn't force them to open because the pounding in his head was just too horrible…however; it was soothed slightly by a soft touch as two hands gently touched his head in a comforting way.

It was strange; he felt this had happened to him before…

He groaned, that damn pounding got worse as he tried to think of where he'd heard this, when this had last happened. Slowly, trying to see passed the blinding light of what had to be the sun; he saw a figure standing over him.

He couldn't make the person out, but the comfort he felt from their gentle hands made him think of only one person who'd ever been so concerned and tender with him "Mom?" he murmured.

There was a deep chuckle, which definitely ruled out his mother "Try again."

As his eyes adjusted to the blinding light the figure slowly got more defined, taller, black hair…those stormy gray eyes stared at him with relief though a bit of concern was still mixed in them.

"Sirius? Wh-where am I?" he muttered softly, the pounding in his head making him sleepy.

A sad smile crossed Sirius face "Hospital wing. It's alright you don't move, you're safe now. You've been unconscious for about 2 hours or so. Nasty knock to the head you got, Madam Pomfrey fixed your ribs though and you leg minded fine."

Remus looked confused "My leg?"

"Yeah, when you got knocked out the Willow…well, let's just say it was very upset and the branches took it out on you." He said softly.

He nodded "Yes, I can see that happening…well, what happened after? You know, to the other guys."

The look of concern vanished completely and anger took its place "The bastards were sent to detention for 'deliberate attempt to injure a student'. Ha! If you ask me, they should've been tied to a rock and dropped in the middle of the lake! Or whipped in the back until-"

"Careful Sirius, you're starting to sound like Filch. Ha, ha- Ah." he grabbed his head, laughing didn't help the pounding.

"I told you don't move!" Sirius said worry once more in his main emotion. He returned to the soft action of rubbing his head, helping the pound dull once more. Remus closed his eyes "Hm…"

Sirius looked down at him "What?"

He sighed eyes still closed "Well…this feels…familiar. Like, this has happened some other time to me. Being in a hospital bed…really familiar…wait."

-Flashback-

_"Oh Remus…" a voice whispered, it sounded strained as though it'd been used for crying and it was laced with concern._

_His head pounded horribly, but two hands…two very soft and gentle hands rubbed his poor head and moved his hair about. He felt tender kisses on his forehead and would occasionally feel a tear hit his face and yet all the voice would say was 'Oh Remus'._

_He struggled t__o force his eyes open "Uhhh…m-mu__m?" he whispered._

_He felt weak, his arms like jelly, his head aching and his side…it felt strange, too strange to put into words…as though it'd been numbed and cut of__f or__ something…_

_The woman who looked down at him had his eyes, but hair was a gold-ish blond. Her face was lined with worry marks while her face was stained with tears. A sad smile came to her lips as she looked at him "Hi honey…how are you f-feelin'?" she whispered, her voice shook and her eyes seemed unusually bright._

_The small boy Remus closed his eyes for a minute "Oh…my head hurts mum…where am I?"_

_She rubbed his __head "St. Mungo's. It's alright now,__ don't__ you__ move, you're safe. You've been asleep for a while now sweetie…oh, mommy's just so glad your alive!" tears ran down her face as she gently hugged his head._

_Remus tried to understand but couldn't "Alive? What happened to me?"_

_The look of concern vanished from her face and sheer loathing took its place "That monster! He…honey, you were out playing in the field again, where daddy told you not to play, weren't you?"_

_A look of guilt crossed his face "I-I didn't mean to mommy I…I'm sorry…"_

_She sighed and rubbed his head "Oh baby…it's ok…just…there was__ rumor of__ a werewolf__ lurking__ around so we…we __just __wanted you close…"_

_He nearly sat up at that "A werewolf?"_

_She nodded, tears forming in her eyes "Yes…and…the healers thought you weren't going to make it…you lost so much blood-" her voice hitched and she covered her face in her hands._

_He felt guilt__ and sadness__ beyond all reason; __not for breaking his parents rule or even the fact that he'd gotten bitten. No, it was because __his strong mother__ was now__ reduced to tears…and it was __all his__ fault. _

_"Mum __don't__ cry, please. I-I'm sorry! Mommy don't cry, I-I'll make it up to you, I promise! I'll do my chores and, and I'll work really hard when I start school-"_

_At the word school her tears got harder. "Oh honey, y-y-you d-d-don't un-un-understand! Y-you- you g-got bit!" she sobbed angrily into her hands._

_He blinked "I know, but they stopped the bleeding, I'm all better."_

_"No, you're not…you…you're a werewolf too now." A new voice said._

_He looked up to see a __male __healer with a saddened expression "Hello there. You must be Remus. I'm your healer, Manguas is the name…"_

_Remus looked confused as the man shook his small hand "What do you mean?__ You fixed me, right?__"_

_His healer took a deep breath and slowly began to explain to him the process of becoming a werewolf and life after the bite.__ He used small words and spoke in a very slow, almost mournful tone, as if would've been better if Remus HAD died._

_Remus stared in shock and horror at what his life would now be like._

_"You…you might not get to go to a school, most teachers and parents don't approve of…well, anyway, if you just keep him locked up on the days of the moon then there should be nothing to worry about." He now addressed Remus mother, who was trying to control her sobs._

_She sniffled and wiped her eyes "Oh…thank you…"_

_He nodded and left. Remus stared ahead in shock…it'd happened so fast…one minute he was a normal kid with a normal life and now…he was one of them…a monster…_

_"M-mum…where's dad?" he asked softly._

_She looked up from her hands and slowly glanced at the window of the ward. Remus followed her gaze to see a man with light brown hair and a small mustache and brown eyes standing by the wall staring at it intensely as though trying to make it move with his mind. It was obvious his hair color was the result of this man and his mother's combined._

_"D-dad?" he asked softly._

_For a moment it didn't seem like the man heard him but then, he slowly turned around. A forced smile was on his face as he stared at his son "D-doin' alright Remus?"_

_Remus couldn't meet his disappointed eyes, his voice sounded like a whip. He instead stared at his blankets and gripped them tight "I…I'm sorry dad…I should've listened to you…"_

_He nodded but didn't say anything._

_Silence._

_"…D-dad?"_

_"Hm?"_

_"You…you still love me, I mean, even though I'm a__…(__gulp)…even if I'm not normal, anymore?" Remus asked softly._

_When he asked this, __his mother stared at his __father apprehensively._

_A__ sort of pleading look on her face that sounded in her voice as she said "John…"_

_Again he hesitated…then he straightened up and said, "Of course I do. You're my son…" but he didn't look him in the eye as he said it. The words were forced and had no meaning._

_It was quiet__ for a __loooong__…then his father got up "Well…I…I have to get to work. If you're still here I'll drop by before heading home." He said with a sort of muffled fury, but Remus heard him._

_"O-ok…bye dad…" he mumbled, wanting to say more but not knowing what else to say._

_His father showed no sign of hearing and left the room. His mother gently moved his hair but said nothing while Remus stared at the door his father had just left out of and it was quiet for a long time._

_"Mom…he doesn't mean it, does he? He…he hates me now…doesn't he?" Remus whispered._

_For a moment she was silent, running her fingers lightly through his hair…then she sighed, "Remus, I can't say how your father feels but…to me, you're my baby. You'll always be my baby and no matter what happens, no matter what you do and no matter what else you become I'll always, ALWAYS…love you…"_

-Flashback ends-

He gasped and bolted upright "That's it! Of course, how could I forget? She said she'll love me no matter what I am or what I do!"

A somewhat jealous sort of frown crossed Sirius face, him having not just seen his thought process "She who?"

"My mom…I wrote her a letter see and…well, I guess I know the answer." Remus mumbled.

Sirius looked relieved and confused "You wrote home? What for?"

Remus sighed "It's difficult…tell you later. Right now, I think I'll take a nap…"

And for the first time in weeks, sleep came easy to him.

Sirius watched as he turned over and closed his eyes. A thoughtful look crossed his face for a moment, wondering why Remus would write to his home when he'd never done it before…he glanced at a calendar and realization hit him hard.

"Oh! I see…" he looked back at Remus with a smile "Hm, of course…"

---

End A/N: 'WHAT?!? WHAT IS IT, TELL ME!!!' is what you may or may not be saying. Maybe you figured it out? Well, if you want to be sure, you're gonna have ta review, or I won't update! Some quick notes before I leave though, as for the beginning, I dunno about you guys but at MY school, damn near everyone's like that. I kid you not, it's a place of prejudice. So, that's were I got that. And as for the ending bit (you know, the flashback) well, I just thought it'd be nice to do a little background stuff on Rem. I've always had my assumptions and that was one. Hope you all like the story thus far, again, don't forget to review, I'll see ya then!


	11. Chapter 11

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Well, I was pleasantly surprised. No one seems to have guessed what I've got in store. Heh, that'll just makes this all the more fun! I love throwing loops at people, keeps the story exciting! Alright then, here we go! Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.)

**Chapter 11**

The next morning whispers of what happened at the Whomping Willow followed the Marauders as they entered the breakfast hall.

Sirius frowned "Are you sure you're ok Remus? We can still go back to the hospital wing and get away from these **vultures**!" He emphasized the last word as they passed a group of girls who were whispering loudly, though at being told-off they shrunk away at that.

James nodded "Yeah. Madam Pomfrey did say you looked a bit peak-ish."

"And, she sent trays up there too right?" Peter asked.

Remus smiled slightly, he knew they were just saying that so he wouldn't have to be the center of attention all morning but he shook his head "No, I'm fine. Besides, running away from them isn't going to help anything."

"_And mom should reply by now._" He added in his head. Even though he knew what she was going to say, he still wanted to get the letter, just to be sure she would still feel the way she did when he was little.

He and Sirius were on talking terms once more, embarrassment all but forgotten. It was hard to be embarrassed when he thought of how Sirius was there for him in the hospital wing.

Still, Sirius seemed to think that the whole incident with the bullies was all his fault and kept the physical contact to a minimum, merely giving him hugs and only occasionally holding his hand if they were alone.

Remus didn't know how to feel about this, as it seemed he was still at war with himself, only now, the argument changed just a bit:

"Excellent, if he just keeps it this way, we won't have any problems! Once he's back to normal we can stop this whole dating nonsense and get on with life."

'_But…I miss his touch._'

"No I don't! I'm not gay and I don't love Sirius! The further he keeps away from me the better!"

'_Hm…__so says you.__'_

The internal struggle he faced was helped slightly by James, who, once he'd been better and Sirius had left, told him about what he'd said with Lily:

"Now just be careful ok? I'll try and keep Sirius off you but there's only so much I can do. Maybe, if you act like…I dunno, like how you were before, you know, freakin' out and stuff? That might do it." James said.

"Right." Remus said.

"Of course…" a strange look crossed his face.

Remus blinked "What?"

He scratched the back of his head awkwardly "WELL…if, you know, you…um…really love him or whatever-"

"I don't!" Remus nearly growled, causing James to look up in surprise.

He sighed apologetically "Sorry, I mean…no James, I don't and I won't. I don't want to I mean and the sooner we get that antidote the sooner we get out of this mess. Right?"

James nodded "Right. Well, I'll help you all the way then, just let me know if he's getting too close, kay? I'll get him off."

Remus nodded as well "Yeah. Thanks."

He still wasn't sure how to go about any of this but none of that mattered at the moment. At the moment, they were all together as friends without any problems (except Sirius who, well you know).

So, as friends with no problems, the four friends took their normal seats at the end of the Gryffindor table and ate in silence for a moment, not really knowing what to say because everyone around them seemed to be listening.

However, everyone dropped interest in them when the post came in. Remus looked up at the many birds and tried to spot a school owl amongst all the other owls flying about.

"Hey James, looks like you've got a letter." Peter said as a spotted gray owl came their way.

Amongst the Marauders, they all knew that James' family owl was a light gray one that was a bit old but not so old it lost it's way or anything and that his name was Manlius.

James smiled and took the letter out of it beak "Thanks Manlius." and after taking a few cornflakes, the bird flew off. He smiled as he unrolled his letter and scanned it through "…Oh, heh, my little cousin Annie said her first word the other day."

"Really? What was it?"

"Doo-doo."

They all laughed and listened as James shared news on what was going on at home. It was always nice to hear that the Potter family was doing well in Godric's Hollow.

"Hm, bit of bad luck though. Seems mum almost broke her ankle when she was weeding the garden." James muttered.

Remus blinked in surprise "She does it by hand?"

"No, apparently some gnomes have taken a liking to her tulips and moved in. She was moving about, wavin' her wand to get the weeds when this stupid gnome pops up and grabs her ankle!" he said, reading it off the letter.

Before they could stay on the subject a school owl flew down and landed at Remus' right. He smiled and took the scroll off the owls' leg. It puffed out its chest importantly, apparently very pleased with its delivery and flew off.

James shook his head "Those school owls got way too much ego for their own good! What'd you get Rem?"

He had just opened it and looked up "It's none of your business what I get in the mail. If you like to read your stuff, fine, but I don't."

James grinned "I only choose to read it aloud cuz if I didn't I'm sure one of you guys'd do this; _Accio letter_!"

The letter zipped out of Remus' hands and went to James.

He frowned, "James!"

"I'll give it back!" he said, reading it swiftly.

Once he'd finished he looked up with a smile "Hm, well, that's interesting…"

Remus tried reaching over the table "Give it!"

"Hold on, I wanna see." Sirius said, taking it from James just as he was about to hand it over.

Remus frowned at him, "Sirius, it's my letter!" but neither of them seemed to hear him.

Sirius read it through "Aw, that's sweet…I wonder what she's gotten you."

Remus snatched the letter "Give me that!" and held it out to read.

Letter:

Remus, do you remember what I told you? It may have been a long time ago but every word I said was true. Whether you're a werewolf or a vampire or whatever, I don't care. You're my son; my baby and I'll always love you, no matter what might happen at school or what you do, ok? And I'm being honest so I don't want to hear anything more about it. Everything's fine here, you're father was able to get a job at a shop in Hogsmede; maybe you'll get to see him on your next trip! We're living in the muggle village for a while but it won't last, we'll get enough money to move soon. Speaking of, it's taken me a long time to get it but I've got it! I can't send it to you by owl, it's a bit big but I know you'll love it! When you get home I'll be sure to give it to you but for now, I wish you have a Happy Birthday. Even though the sky's giving you an awful present, I know you'll be fine. I hope that answers your questions and that you're well. I love you and be safe over there, ok?

Missing you tons,

Mum

He blinked "…Oh yeah…" he wasn't about to admit it but all this mess with Sirius nearly made him forget! His birthday was coming in just a few days actually. And, so was the full moon, on the same day no less.

He handed the letter to Peter who looked a little putout for not getting to read it too. He looked up once he'd finished reading "Oh, whaddya reckon she got you then?"

Remus shrugged "I'm honestly not sure."

"Well think about it. Is there anything you said you wanted?" James asked.

Remus shrugged again "Probably. I dunno, but knowing my mom she probably went through any lengths to get it for me, whatever it was." A small smile came to his face.

"What does she mean though, about the sky?"

James scoffed "Don't be stupid Pete, there's a full moon that night!"

He nodded "Ooh, right…wow, that sucks."

Remus sighed, "Well it, wouldn't be the first time it's happened."

Breakfast was fairly normal, they ate and laughed, the only thing really out of place was Sirius seemed oddly quiet and thoughtful. When they all got up to leave they said goodbye to him and headed to the first class of the day.

---

"Well, I can't say I really enjoyed that lesson." Remus said darkly as the exited their classroom

They'd just gotten out of Defense Against the Dark Arts and now that they'd covered non-verbal spells, Professor Sune thought it fit to go back to dark creatures they were studying, lunch was were they were headed next.

"Hm, 2 parchment essay about how to kill a werewolf…" he muttered.

He could tell by the look Sune was giving him throughout class that he was assigning this on purpose. He was obviously still angry about what had happened in the hall what seemed like ages ago.

James patted him on the back "Ah, cheer up Rem, if it means anything I snuck a niffler in his room to get that horrid ring he wears on his hand, which we should hear right about…wait for it…"

There was a crash from the room and Professor Sune's yells of anger and apparently pain behind them.

Remus stifled a snicker "Quick, let's get out of here before he blames us!"

Once they were out of earshot though, their laughter rang through the hallway as they walked to lunch. Peter was slightly red from laughing too hard and took a few deep breaths when they were far enough away.

"Nice one James!" Remus chuckled.

James bowed "Thank you, thank you! You've been a great audience!"

As they started up to the Great Hall their laughter died a bit.

Remus sighed, "Well, that was a good pick-me-up, but I just remember I've got to send a reply to my mum."

James suddenly frowned "Now wait a minute, we're going with you then. We don't want another incident like before."

Peter nodded "Yeah!" but at the wrong moment his stomach let out a hungry, almost angry, growl at being ignored. He went slightly pink and held his stomach "Sorry…"

Remus smiled "Don't worry, those idiots are doing detention right now! Besides, you guys are hungry. Go on, I'll be fine. I'm just going to send the letter off and be right back."

James frowned still "Remus, I really don't think you should go alone-"

"Trust me, I'll be fine! They're in detention!" Remus said over his shoulder as he left. James made to follow him but a crowd of hungry students crossed and Remus was lost in the crowd.

He looked over the crowd as best he could "Wait Remus! Oh, damn, he's gone!"

Still, Remus was right (of course). He didn't meet the gorilla kid and his group of thugs as he walked out to the Owlery. In fact, he didn't meet anyone, as they all seemed to be heading to lunch.

Once up there he pulled out a parchment and quill:

Dear mum, thanks for the answer, it made me feel better. I remember it, but I guess I just needed to hear it again to make it sink in. Glad to hear dad's got work again, I'll see if I can find him around. As for my gift…can't you give me a hint in what it is, please? Best of wishes with the muggles then, hope the lack of magic doesn't drive you crazy like last time.

Love,

Remus

He smiled, folded it up and called a school owl down to him. In truth, he really was curious about what it could be and glad to have the curiosity, it'd taken his mind off this whole 'love potion' mess though almost all his classes.

"I don't really remember asking for anything specifically but…" he muttered as he tied the letter to the owl's leg and sent it off.

Once it was gone, he to left the Owlery, still thinking about his gift.

"A broom? Hm, never really asked for one and she could probably post that anyway…oh, an owl? No, she'd be able to send it with a letter saying it's mine…new robes? No. A new book? But what kind? Hmm…" he walked back to the castle throwing out random things that came to his mind. Some of them were outrageous things, just for fun gifts and some maybe but he wasn't to sure on anything.

However, his thoughts on his gift were broken of because just as he was back in the castle, about to enter the Great Hall a voice yelled "Hey fruit!"

He turned in surprise; it wasn't the gorilla kid, but some of the lackeys who apparently had minds of their own. The boy who said it sneered but didn't seem to have a wand on him.

Remus frowned coldly "A grunt who can think for itself; something I thought I'd never see."

There was a loud BANG behind him and thin cords wrapped themselves around Remus' ankles and legs, snapping them together as well as his arms to his sides and over his mouth, gagging him and holding him together like a mummy. Off balanced by this sudden bonding, he fell to the ground. As it turns out he was too busy glaring at the ones before him he didn't notice a few had slipped behind him. Remus struggled against the bonds that held him and yelled muffled words at the group.

The boy who did it smirked "You may have gotten Jim, Ed, Jerry and Bill in trouble, but we got you now!"

"So, what we gonna do with him?" someone out of Remus' vision asked.

"He's all tied up, lets rough him up a bit!"

"Yeah!"

"Now wait a minute, wait a minute lets think about it for a moment…hmm…I know, lets hang him from top of the Astrology tower and see if he wets himself!" a boy laughed.

Everyone seemed to agree on that one as someone grabbed the ends of the cords.

"Hmph, I still say we should rough him up, teach him a lesson for puttin' big Jim out." The one from before said.

Someone sighed, "Fine, fine…but after we go with my idea, agreed?"

Everyone murmured in agreement and Remus felt himself being held up against the wall.

A boy approached him. He had dark red hair that went below his shoulders slightly and covered one of his dark brown eyes. He also had a very thin figure, thinner then his! It was almost like looking at a red mop with robes.

He grinned, reveling crooked yellow teeth "This'll be fun…"

Remus glared at him defiantly, still struggling against his bonds. If he was going to go down he didn't want to shirk away and let Gryffindors be remember like that by a mindless idiot like him.

The mop laughed to the others "Wow, Jim wasn't jokin'! This one's got guts…" he turned back to Remus and pulled out his wand, slowly pointing it to his chest "Let's see what color they are then…"

Before he could so much as open his mouth a voice screamed "Expelliarmus!"

The redheaded mop flew across the room, his wand going about 20 feet way as well as the wands of the other captures. Remus, no longer being held to the wall, fell hard to the floor. He winced at the impact and was almost certain his nose was bleeding from it.

What happened next he wasn't too sure, but it sounded like whoever had rescued him was fighting the rest of them.

"What the hell-?!"

"Get him!"

There sound of punches and noises of pain echoed the hallway, wands seemed forgotten to all of them. Remus struggled to lift his head or even turn over to see what was going on, but he was held tight to where he was.

A loud snap, a gagging sound and a grunt of pain were the last of the fighting noises before one of the thugs yelled to the rest "This guy's cracked! Let's get out of here!"

And the sound of fleeing footsteps echoed and some ways away there was also heavy breathing. Remus felt the last of their steps vibrate against the marble ground so he tried harder then ever to get out of his bonds.

There was a gasp, as though his liberator just remember he was there and quickly rushed forward and untied him "Remus, are you alright?" he asked with worry.

At his voice, Remus knew exactly who it was that was untying him before he'd even got up.

"Ugh, I'm fine…thanks Sirius." He said; rubbing his arms as Sirius untied his legs.

It turned out he was right, the fall had made his nose bleed and from the feel of it, quite a lot, it was still bleeding. The only injures that were visible on Sirius was the black eye he was sporting, a few bruises on his face and neck and his mouth was bleeding, though not as much as Remus' nose.

Sirius frowned, "Your nose! Damn those cowardly bastards! Are you ok? Do you want to go to Madam Pomfrey?"

Before he could answer though, a teacher came out of the Great Hall "What is all this racket? We can hear- (gasp!) Black, Lupin! What, in Merlin's name is going on out here?!"

It was McGonagall and she stared reproachingly at the two of them but at the sound of their names the rest of the hall seemed to have gotten out of their seats, a few people even peaked out from the room.

"Professor this isn't what it looks like! A group of idiots tied Remus up and were about to beat the stuffing out of him! They just ran that way out the door, the cowards…" Sirius said defensively.

McGonagall turned to Remus "Is this true?"

He nodded "Yes ma'am, they went that way. I was just coming to eat lunch and they attacked for no reason."

She stared at the two of them for a long time, as if trying to look into their minds before finally she let out a frustrated sigh "Oh…Lupin go to Madam Pomfrey before you bleed yourself dry!"

He pinched his nose "Um, yes ma'am…" and walked down the corridor with Sirius at his side, trying to ignore the many murmurs they heard behind them as they went.

Neither spoke or even looked at each other for a long time, though Remus could distinctly hear Sirius muttering angrily under his breath. The word 'filthy' was heard as well as 'coward' amongst the mutters.

Finally Sirius looked over at him and gently put a hand on his shoulder "They didn't hurt you too bad did they?"

Remus sighed and though his voice sounded nasally from being pinched he said, "No, Sirius, I told you I'm fine. I got this when you blasted that red haired guy. He was holding me up and when he was knocked off I just fell on the ground…not that it hurt to bad, my nose took most of the fall."

Sirius nodded but was still frowning "Right…but still, it shouldn't have happened at all! I told James not to leave you alone, where was he?!"

Remus frowned and took his hand off his nose "Excuse me, but I think I can take care of myself. Plus, I don't exactly remember asking for a bodyguard."

"After what happened the other day you didn't have to! You know how those morons are! They won't attack you if there's someone with you, they only like unfair fights! Imagine if I didn't get there when I did…what they could've done to you…" Sirius seemed to be giving this possibility more thought then Remus was, who, instead of being grateful for his rescue was pretty angry.

"Look, I told him and Peter to get lunch, they were hungry! And anyway, I don't need people tailing me like I'm a target about to get hit!" he said heatedly.

Sirius frowned deeper "You don't know these people! As far as they're concerned that's exactly what you are! Where were you anyways, why weren't you at lunch?!"

"I went to the Owlery! Or do I have to ask permission to go places now!?"

"I didn't say that! I'm just saying you should have someone with you and at least tell me where you're going to be at! The Owlery seems a bit dangerous now, no teachers; it's the perfect place for an attack…Remus you can't go up there anymore-"

Wrong – thing – to – say.

Remus stopped dead in his tracks and turned to face Sirius, anger flaring in his eyes "Can't?! What, you're 'forbidding' me from going then? Is that what you're saying?!"

Sirius looked at him in surprise "Wh-what? N-no I didn't-"

"Last I checked you're not my parents, not Minster of Magic or even a teacher so you CAN'T tell me what to do! I'll go where ever the hell I want and if you got something to say about it-"

"I'm just trying to look out for you, you're my boyfriend!" Sirius shot angrily.

"That can change you know!"

Sirius looked as though he'd just been shot. He stared at Remus with wide, fearful eyes "What are you saying?"

Remus glared at him, his anger unfazed but didn't speak. What was he saying?

"I…I'm saying…I can go to Madam Pomfrey's without your help, thanks!" he stammered, though still managing to hold an angry glare as he marching down the hall.

Sirius walked after him "But Rem-"

He turned on his heel and Sirius stopped "Are you daft!? I SAID I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP! WHY IS THAT SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND?! You want me to make this simple? Fine. GO AWAY AND **LEAVE ME ALONE!!!**" and was off again.

Sirius stayed rooted in his spot as he watched Remus leave, it felt as though he'd just swallowed a block of ice. He wanted to say something but his voice was lost and Remus was getting further and further away…

A haggard cackle made him look up to see Peeves floating overhead.

Peeves grinned devilishly "Ohhh, a lover's quarrel I see?"

Sirius clenched his teeth angrily "Shut up…"

"But what if this is the big one? You might lose Loony Lupin for good!" he said gleefully floating about.

Sirius wrenched out his wand his wand and shouted "Immoblulous!"

But Peeves floated away, screaming at the top of his voice "LUPIN DUMPED BLACK! Lupin _**DUMPED**_ Black!" Sirius shot a few spells after him but he was disappearing and reappearing to quick.

Sirius chased him a bit but then stopped and stood in his spot, anger slowly starting to take up every inch of him, Peeves words still echoing in the hall. He let out a yell of frustration and punched the wall, kicked it as well, out of sheer anger.

"Dammit, dammit, DAMMIT!!!" he yelled angrily, sinking to the floor and punching the stone ground.

For a moment he just stayed like that, on his knees holding his hand that he was had a few broken bones in it at this point, breathing heavily and glaring at the floor as though it were its fault this was happening…the floor got a little fuzzy as his eyes started to burn.

"_What've I done…_" he thought sorrowfully as a few silent tears hit the floor.

---

Remus snuck a quick glance back over his shoulder. Sirius' yell echoed angrily even to where he stood now. Part of him wanted to go back and see if he was ok but he ignored that part.

"_What if he's hurt?_"

"I bet! He's probably just having a fit over what happened, you heard how it sounded."

"_You should go back and apologize._"

"NO! This is teaching that idiot a lesson! I'm not some object or a…a 5 year-old who can't make their own decisions! He's got no right telling me what I can and can't do; I'm not his property! Besides, we're not even **really** going out; this is just so he won't kill himself!"

"_But you still wish you were!_"

"No I don't! And if you say one more word I'll-"

"My dear boy, whoever are you yelling at?" a voice asked calmly in front of him.

He looked up quickly and nearly fell at who he saw there. He'd been so busy with this argument he hadn't noticed he wasn't alone and nearly walked into Albus Dumbledore.

"Uh…S-sorry, sir." He muttered softly, surprised to see the headmaster here instead of at lunch and embarrassed for having just had a conversation out-loud with himself.

Dumbledore smiled "It's quite alright. I was just about to go to lunch, just finished some work in my office, would you like to join me?"

"No sir, I have to go to Madam Pomfrey for…" he stopped when he realized his nose was no longer bleeding "Er, n-never mind. Well, I should still change my robes…"

Dumbledore smiled "Allow me." He pulled out his wand and pointed at the blood on Remus' front. Some bubbles scrubbed him though he did not feel wet when it stopped and the stains were all but gone.

"There we are. Nothing ever gets blood completely out, except maybe Plinitum sap, though, at least now you don't look as though you've emerged from a bloody duel." He said cheerfully putting his wand back in his robes.

Remus nodded "Yes, thank you sir."

For a moment neither said anything, Dumbledore smiled politely and Remus kept his gaze with the floor. Arguing out loud to himself, Dumbledore must have thought him mad. Even he'd think himself mad now…wait, Dumbledore!

"Um sir? Do you…I mean, by any chance, would you know when the antidote might be ready?" he asked slowly.

Dumbledore smiled "It's hard to say. Professor Ronts has it to a nice simmer right now, though it may take more time…I take it, things are not going so well with Mr. Black?"

Remus frowned, glanced back over his shoulder and clenched his fists "You could say that…"

Dumbledore nodded though still smiled "Funny, the things people will do or say when they care about us so deeply."

Remus looked up so fast he was surprised his neck didn't break "Sir?"

"It's a shame, the moon will be full soon and on your birthday no less." Dumbledore said, as though he hadn't heard said anything out of the ordinary.

He nodded "Yes well, it wouldn't be the first time it's happened sir."

Dumbledore nodded "Right…well, if you don't wish to go to lunch I will see you later, I'm sure."

"Yes, well um…have a good lunch, sir." He mumbled, heading off to Gryffindor tower.

Dumbledore smiled as he left "Thank you Remus, I'll be sure to. And I wouldn't worry about Sirius if I were you. We all know he's said his share of things he didn't mean over the years. It's best to just forgive and forget."

Remus turned quickly but Dumbledore was already halfway down the hall. For a moment Remus watched him leave then slowly went upstairs, silently wondering it he had eyes all around the school.

---

End A/N: Ok, that's all for now! Hm, that was a rather nasty fight huh? Did you see it comin'? Are you curious to what happens next? WELL, if you are, you'll have to review, thanks to those who've stuck with me this far!


	12. Chapter 12

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Glad you enjoyed last chapter, I'm always pleased to hear your thoughts and comments on it, thanks to all who reviewed! Well, other then that, I've got nothing to add, so here's chapter 12:)

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.)

**Chapter 12**

The rest of the day was like a slow torture for Sirius. When he tried to catch Remus at dinner he wasn't there and when it was time for bed he was already 'asleep'. Sirius could swear he saw his eye open slightly, but James advised it probably wouldn't help his chances for forgiveness if he woke him up.

In the end he listened and left Remus alone. Although he blamed both Peter and James for this happening in the first place, they were the only ones he could talk to about it or ask for help about.

He spent most of that night laying awake and staring at the dark room where his friends slept, occasionally getting out of bed and looking out the window. That turned out to be his undoing because he was the last one awake, so he missed Remus, who was the first.

"Why didn't you wake me up?!" he nearly shouted at James as he quickly grabbed some cloths and tried to pull them on. His overall plan was to get him in the morning and try to fix the damage before it got too deep.

James frowned "It wouldn't have mattered anyway; Remus was probably up way before I was!"

Sirius' insides squirmed with anticipation as he tried to pull a shirt on that didn't seem to fit "I'll just…I'll talk to him at breakfast…" he told himself "He can't escape there- Dammit what's wrong with this shirt!?"

"Um, maybe they don't fit because they're pants…" Peter said meekly, as James seemed to be struggling not to laugh.

In any normal situation they would have all laughed but right now, but Sirius didn't seem to be in the mood for it.

Sirius frowned and pulled his arm out of his pant leg "Ugh! See?! He's got my mind all stupid!"

James sighed, in an attempt to fend off the silent giggles "Well…come on then, let's go before he rushes through breakfast."

They all took rushed showers and Sirius nearly had them running to the Great Hall but surprisingly, Remus didn't seem to be there yet. There were only about 10 people in the hall overall, 2 yawning Ravenclaws, a tall Hufflepuff boy, 3 Slytherins who seemed wide awake and were laughing at something and 4 Gryffindor girls who were whispering amongst themselves but at the sight of Sirius were silent.

Sirius frowned "I don't understand…where is he?!"

James and Peter were silent, not wanting his anger pointed at them.

The three of them took their seats at their normal spot as the breakfast plates began to fill with food. Sirius didn't even glance at them as they did but instead stared intensely at the door.

Peter softly nudged James "I think this is getting really out of hand…look at him!"

Sirius had a death-grip on his fork and was digging it into the table as he stared at the door with an unusual expression on his face. Each time a someone walked in that wasn't Remus he dug the fork deeper in the wood.

James nodded "I think you're right Pete."

"What do we do?"

James hesitated, why'd they all think he knew the answer? Oh right, he was the leader…

Finally he sighed "Well…not much we can do…maybe we could try to get his attention off Rem for a second or two…"

Peter nodded "Right."

James cleared his throat "Um, Sirius, you want some kipper?"

"Not hungry." He said, not taking his eyes off the door.

Peter took a deep breath and followed James lead "A-are you sure? There's some great eggs here and-"

"I said I'm not hungry!" he snapped and the few people in the hall looked their way.

Peter went slightly pink and stared at the table "Kay." and he and James were silent once more, not having the nerve to try getting Sirius' attention again. The tense look on his face was almost frightening.

He constantly grounded that fork into the wood, as if he were trying to make a hole in it, probably to relief the stress. James and Peter looked at Sirius worriedly then back at the door as well. If Remus didn't show up they were afraid he might lose it.

The constant whispers about the 'break-up' weren't helping anything.

Sirius clenched his teeth angrily "Damn that Peeves…"

Yet, in his mind, he wasn't sure whether it was true or not. It was one of the reasons he _needed_ to talk with him. Remus never exactly said the words 'I'm breaking up with you' just that…it could change. Fear came into the mix of all he was feeling, he didn't want to lose him.

"_What if…what if he doesn't come at all? Is he avoiding me again? No…no he can't, not again! I just got him talking to me!_" he thought awfully.

However, Remus did eventually come into the Great Hall. The fork Sirius was digging into the table nearly went all the way through at the pressure Sirius put on it, his knuckles turned white.

Most of the hall went silent.

Remus casually walked past all the tables, meeting eyes with no one and ignoring the whispers that followed him as he came to the Gryffindor table. Sirius made to stand up but Remus did the unexpected.

Without looking at any of them, he went to the other end of the table, as far away from the other Marauders as possible and began eating breakfast as though there were nothing out of the ordinary.

Though no words were spoken amongst _them_, the breakfast hall burst with whispers at what just happened.

"Did you see that?"

"Didn't even try to talk to him!"

"Did you catch the look on Black's face?"

Sirius stared as though he'd just be Confunded. A blank sort of look on his face as he stared apparently at the wall, though no one could guess what he was actually looking at or even seeing.

James swallowed nervously "…Sirius?"

No answer.

He waved a hand in front of his face but the blank look remained and he didn't so much as blink as he sat in an almost petrified state.

James glanced down at the end of the table, but Remus did not look up from his plate. In fact, he finished his breakfast and walked out just as calmly as he'd come in, without meeting eyes or saying a word to anyone.

---

"What the hell was that all about?!" James shouted, not bothering to keep his voice down, when he stopped Remus after their first class.

Peter glanced around "Shh, people are staring…"

Remus seemed to take no notice to the tone James had and spoke indifferently "I'm sorry James, but I don't really know what you're talking about-"

James frowned "Oh come off it! You know how Sirius is Rem! The potion, remember? The guy's in love with you and you just shrug him off?"

Remus met his frown "Wrong. He's not 'in love with me'! Potions can't produce actual love; he's just got a strong fixation with me! It's an obsession not love and, I've personally had **enough** of this charade! The antidote's almost done so why bother any more?!"

"BECAUSE YOU-" Peter elbowed him in the ribs and said a gruff 'shhh'!

James took a breath and struggled to keep his voice level, it was like being in the library or something! "Because, you remember what happened last time right? When the idiot nearly poisoned himself!"

But Remus seemed deaf to these words "Oh, I think it's time to get to next class. See you later then!"

James frowned "Wait a minute! You can't just ignore this! You're driving Sirius mad and making him look like a complete idiot in front of everyone! Doesn't that make you the least bit guilty-"

"Goodbye." He said briefly and before James could get a hold on his robes he slipped into the crowd and was gone again.

Peter swallowed nervously "This…isn't good…James, what if Sirius-"

"He won't! We…we just have to keep him occupied that's all. If Remus is going to ignore what could happen then fine! We'll take care of this without him!" James spat angrily, still glaring at where Remus had disappeared.

"But how?" Peter whimpered.

James didn't answer. He honestly didn't know what to do either but…they had to do something…

"Come on, let's go find him." He muttered, turning angrily into the crowed with Peter at his heels.

---

Remus bit his lip and fought the urge to go back and talk to James and Peter.

"No, you've already gotten so far, if you back down now it'll destroy everything you've worked all morning to get going." A voice in his head said determinedly.

You see, after the last little encounter he'd been doing some thinking and came up with a plan. Dumbledore said that the potion was near finished. If he could just pull this off then-

"_I don't know…this seems like a bad idea…_" a smaller, meeker voice argued.

"But if we ignore him just for a bit longer then when he's back to normal he'll thank me. Imagine how embarrassed he'll be if he's back to normal and remembers our own little history! No, this is for the better. It may be hurting him now but he'll get over it!"

"_Yes that's all fine and good but what about James and Peter? Why ignore them and act like this to them too?_"

"Because they talk to Sirius and he talks to them! If they knew what was going on and they told him then he might try something crazy to get you to pay attention to him!"

Remus nodded "Right. No matter what happens, no matter what he does I can't pay him any attention."

"_But Dumbledore said forgive and forget!_"

"This hasn't got anything to do with that! This is about the overall picture! Look at the whole picture! I mean, if you really love Sirius then wouldn't you want him not be remembered as 'that gay guy'?"

The arguing voice was silent for the first time in a while. (1)

"Exactly. So if you really love him, you'll stay away from him and stick to the plan!"

"_Well…we should at least let Peter and James know what's going on so they don't think I'm just becoming a jerk!_"

Remus' argument was stopped as he nearly walked into a door.

He shook his head and hurried along to his classroom "Gotta watch where I'm going…"

"Ok, you can tell them as long as they promise not to interfere with it."

However, after what had happened in the hall James didn't seem to want anything to do with Remus and was determined to stay mad at him and Peter (him being who he was) followed after James like a frightened lamb, sometimes casting Remus a look that he might have listened to him but James always gave him a glare that said 'who's side are you on' and he kept his mouth shut.

Remus sighed sadly as James stormed away for what had to be the 5th time "Maybe I was…too convincing earlier?"

"_You think?_"

---

James and Peter looked for Sirius at lunch but he was nowhere to be seen. They checked outside for him but nothing, the Owlery, Quidditch pitch, anywhere Sirius might have been but they couldn't find him!

Actually, he was in the last place anyone would expect him to be…

"The library?! Ugh, what's this world coming to?" James whispered as they came in, spotting Sirius at once at a table, staring down at a book.

Peter stared in amazement "I never thought I'd see the day when he came in here willingly!"

James sighed, "Come on, let's go."

They walked forward casually though Sirius didn't lift his head, apparently fascinated by whatever he was reading. He was so close his nose was practically touching the book.

"If he says he's in here trying to remember what Remus smelt like by smelling the book he last touched, I may vomit." James muttered to Peter out of the corner of his mouth.

Peter stifled a giggle and they both sat across from Sirius. However, the book had his full attention and he didn't seem to feel the presence of other people. James and Peter exchanged looks before he tapped the top of the book page.

Sirius nearly jumped with a start.

James tried to smile casually "Hey, whatcha doin?" he whispered.

Sirius grinned, "Hey James, you're just in time too! Here, look at this…" he passed the book to James and held his finger at a part of it.

James' eyes widened "Where'd you get this book?!" he whispered loudly, well, as loud as one can whisper and still call it whispering.

Sirius continued to grin, "Restricted section of course! This, this is perfect, _this_ is how I'll get him back!"

James looked at the book uneasily "I dunno mate, I mean…this is complicated…why are we picking it up again now? We were taking a break for now, right?"

"Because!" Sirius looked like he was struggling to keep the excitement out of his voice but his eyes shone with glee "His birthday's coming up and we all know it's the full moon, this'll make him so happy; it'll be the perfect apology!"

James pushed the book to Peter then looked back at Sirius "Yeah, about that…look um, Sirius, can I be honest with you?"

Sirius didn't seem to really be paying attention and nodded "Course you can James. Oh this'll be so perfect!"

"Um right…well…did you ever think…you know, maybe…you'd be better off…without…Remus?" he mumbled softly.

The cheerfulness died immediately from his eyes the moment those words left James' mouth and he spoke not in a whisper but in a loud, demanding sort of voice as he said "**What?!**"

"Wait a second! Don't go off the handle, we're in a library!" James said quickly.

His loud 'what' got the attention of the librarian only for a brief second but when he didn't continue speaking in the tone she went back to sorting out books, though glancing over there every now and again.

Sirius didn't speak but glared at James as though he'd just said a great offense.

Peter gasped when he finished reading the book "You mean you're going to try-"

"SHHH!" both James and Sirius said quickly.

Sirius snatched the book from his hands and shoved a few more books angrily into his bags. James cringed and Peter looked confused as he forcefully shut his bag and threw it over his shoulder.

He stood up and glared at James angrily "If you think our friendship is worth anything, you won't say anything like that to me ever again." he said in a menacing whisper.

James sighed, "But Sirius-"

"No James! I love him. This isn't some stupid joke, it's true and if you can't accept that-"

"I wasn't saying that!" James said defensively. "Look, I'm just…it nothing, ok? Can we just…pretend I didn't say it?"

Sirius stared at him for a moment but slowly nodded "Fine…let's go then, I think lunch might be over."

Peter followed silently behind his friends. Even once they were out of the library it was tensely quiet. James looked apprehensively at Sirius but Sirius didn't meet his eye. They walked in silence until Sirius had to go to his next class, a class that he no longer shared with his fellow Marauders.

He smiled slightly "Well, see ya guys later."

James nodded "Right."

"Bye." Peter said meekly and Sirius went off in a different direction.

James sighed once he was out of sight "Well, so much for that plan. We can't advise him against Remus or he'll freak out…there's got to be something we can do…"

"Did you see those books?! James, I think he's serious about Remus. No pun intended of course." Peter said.

James shook his head "That's what the potion does. It seems so real but it's not. Still, we have to figure out a way to get him off it. I mean, Remus acting like how he is, that might help some."

Peter sighed, "I dunno…he's got a pretty good plan. If we're able to finish it by Remus' birthday then it'll be the perfect present."

"Then we'll just have to stall it, make sure Sirius doesn't finish it in time!" James said determinedly.

---

End A/N: I'm gonna take a guess at what you may or may not be thinking again, 'GRRRR! DAMN THAT AUTHOR!! WHAT'S SHE TALKING ABOUT?!' OR, did you guys figure it out? Hehehe, well, either way, I ain't tellin' ya! It'll all become clear in the next chapter. Some of you think you know what it is? Tell me then! Tell me what you think, review!

(1): I like to picture that little scene as 'shoulder devil and angel arguing'. As I said before though, you decide for yourselves which is which!


	13. Chapter 13

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Ding, ding, ding! YAY! You're all so smart, you get cookies! hands out cyber cookies Either you're smart or I'm to obvious, but either way, you're right! Here's the chapter!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.)

**Chapter 13**

James had a good plan there; the only flaw was he underestimated just how serious Sirius could be. It was nearly 5 in the morning when James was woken up by the frustrated scribbling of a quill.

He blinked his eyes open and reached for his wand and glasses. He yawned, "Lumos." And the tip of his wand lit. Though it wasn't the brightest light he could see Sirius with a book open on his lap and scribbling things on a parchment.

His eyes widened "Sirius? What are you doing?"

Sirius looked up and smiled tiredly "Oh hey James. You're just in time too! I've reached a bit of a snag in the plan, this is really complex…I think it'll need both our skills to work right."

James glanced at the ground "Yeah…you know, this all seems a bit rushed, why not wait till later to do it?" in his head he added "_Like when you've had the antidote and aren't acting insane anymore._"

Sirius sighed, "I told you, it's for Remus' birthday! Course it's rushed, we don't have much time!"

James smiled slightly "Which is probably why we should do it later. You know, when we have time to think it through so it doesn't go horribly wrong!" he added when Sirius looked up at him.

Sirius stared at him for a long time, "…If you don't want to help me then fine, I'll do it on my own. This is the best thing I can do him and you bet your arse I will, if it kills me…"

James nearly got out of his bed "No! No, no, no, I didn't say that! Course I'm gonna help you…but…" he yawned again and looked at a clock "The sun's not even up. Don't you think we should work when we're awake?"

A small smile came to Sirius' face "Well, we're less likely to get caught if we do it now but…" he too yawned "I guess you're right, I've been up for a about 3 hours give or take…a short nap might be…" what it might be James didn't find out because Sirius leaned his head back and was out.

James sighed and got up. He took the books from Sirius' lap and shoved them under his bed. If he wanted this to be a surprise he couldn't have them out in the open like that.

He grabbed the lit wand from his sleeping friend "Nox." And put it back on the counter with his own wand and glasses. As he settled back into bed he saw his plan would not work.

"_I don't want him to be all stupid about this and end up cursed or something because he did it on his own. McGonagall said this could go horribly wrong, which is why the Ministry watches it carefully…no, I have to help him…stupid idiot…_" he thought angrily, trying to get back into the comfortable state of sleep he was in before.

---

That night James had strange dreams where Sirius had a long horse's tail permanently stuck on his head and kept screaming that it was all his fault for screwing up the Animagus spell while James' only excuse was that Remus spilled pumpkin juice on him so he wasn't really angry, it was just the pumpkin juice making him mad and Peter kept wailing that the books were biting him but Remus didn't help because he was too busy ignoring them and when they asked him why he was doing so he said 'it's because your socks are too long' and left.

"Hey James, wake up!" a squeaky voice said, penetrating the weirdness. Peter was shaking him lightly on the shoulder, trying to coax him wake. "Come on! You don't want to miss breakfast do you?"

James groaned and rolled over, still half asleep "If you wash the pumpkin juice off it won't be so bad…"

Peter blinked "What? James!"

After a bit more shaking James finally sat up with a loud yawn and rubbed his eyes "Oh, hey Peter…"

"Hey. Sirius wouldn't wake up either, what's with you guys?"

James scrunched up his eyes as he tried to remember "Oh yeah, um…well, Sirius is really serious about this so there's a change in plans. We can't let him work on this on his own, he might end up messing it up and you remember some of the mess ups we saw…"

Peter shuddered "Ohhh! Like that guy with a toucan's beak that nothing could get rid of?"

"Exactly. No, we've got to help him now…I guess there's really nothing we can do to get him to stop this thing with Remus." James muttered.

---

Today was no different from yesterday. Remus didn't so much as acknowledge he knew any of them and walked to the opposite end of the table. Sirius watched him with sorrowful eyes and didn't eat breakfast.

James wanted to hit him and Remus. Him for being so pathetic and Remus for acting like a total prick! Still, he resisted the urge to do either and silently ate his breakfast.

Sirius suddenly got up "Come on, let's try and get some work done on our project now."

Peter looked longingly at the table "But-"

"Come on!" Sirius said forcefully.

James groaned and threw his bag over his shoulder. "_Great, now every time we're not in a class he's gonna wanna work on this thing!_" he thought bitterly as he followed Sirius out.

A quick glance over his shoulder to make sure they'd gotten everything and he noticed Remus was watching them leave, a curious expression on his face. James scoffed and continued out.

Remus was really getting on his nerves. He didn't even tell them why he was acting this way! Well, that was all just well enough for him, now they were stuck with a love-sick Sirius!

---

Love-sick or not, it was possibly the first time anyone had ever seen Sirius so…well, serious! He worked hard to make the Animagus thing go of without a hitch and he was snippy about it too.

Precise and quick, no mistakes were made so far, but that was the easy part, just figuring out how to actually turn yourself into the animal and come out of it at will. A day or so passed and the boys started talking about what kind of animals they wanted to be.

Despite the fact Sirius was using this as a way to win Remus over, James couldn't help enjoying this and imagining what it'd be like to be an animal.

"We'll probably need to be big animals, you know, to make sure Remus doesn't get out of control." James said in the dorm when it was break.

"Hm, but what about the knot in the tree? Big animals don't really have a good a chance ducking the branches to get to it." Sirius said thoughtfully as he flipped through the notes he'd made on Animagi.

Peter sighed "Well, what kind of small animal? I don't mind being the small one really."

"Course you don't! You're the small one in real life!" James said playfully.

Sirius flipped through a few books then smiled "Hey, I think I know what I'll be…"

James gave him a curious look "What?"

Sirius grinned, "That, is a surprise, my dear friend!"

James sighed, "Well…I dunno…for me I…well…I've always like the stags in forests. My dad took me up once and I saw a whole herd of them, it was amazing! I really wouldn't mind bein' one of them."

Peter smiled "Well, if I have to be a small animal, I think I'd want to be a rat."

The other two looked at him "A rat?"

He nodded "Yeah! I mean, they always get a bad rep you know? Spreading the plague, people are afraid of them, especially girls. I don't see how it works! I mean, they love hamsters and gerbils but one rat and they all start screaming! They're all rodents; I don't see what the big deal is."

James smiled "Hey, you make a good point there!"

"Yeah! I mean, what's so scary about a rat?"

Sirius snickered "I think it's the tail. It looks like it's got a worm that's trying to bite off its rear!"

This made James bust out laughing but Peter frowned "Ok, ok, so it's got a worm-ish tail, big deal! I still like 'em."

James tried to calm down "Alright, alright…you can be the rat; I'll be a stag and Sirius-"

"Ah, ah, ah! A surprise!" he said.

James rolled his eyes "And Sirius'll has his surprise."

As they discussed the change and stuff, think about whether it'd hurt or not, Peter got an idea "Hey you know…that's not a bad…"

James looked over at him "What's not?"

He smiled "Well, I was just thinking about what Sirius said…worm-tail…I like that! That can be like…like my secrete name or something, for when we're talking about ourselves as animals! Yeah, I like it, Wormtail!"

James laughed "Yeah? Ok, um…for me, I'll have to go with…hm, now I'm a stag so…um…oh, I know! Prongs!"

Peter tilted his head "Prongs?"

He grinned "Yeah! You know how they got the antlers that stick all over the place like thorns. Prongs, I like it…Sirius?"

Sirius smirked "Surprise!"

"Ugh…and Sirius' nickname is 'Surprise'…"

---

It wasn't long before they were nearly done with it. All they need now was to cast it on themselves, something they were all a little frightened to do. The book they had showed many things that happened when people got it wrong, it was risky.

Remus, meanwhile, was completely in the dark about it. He'd glance over at his friends and debate on going and talking to them.

"_Maybe this is a mistake. What if, even after this whole mess is over they still don't want to talk to me?_" He thought.

"That won't happen! I'll just explain to them what it was about, they'll understand." He told himself bracingly.

Somehow he wasn't so sure but kept with it anyway.

At break time once he had to go outside to spend it because Sirius tried talking to him. He couldn't help feel a pang of guilt when he caught a glimpse of Sirius depressed look when he walked out.

"_Sorry Sirius, but…you'll thank me later…I hope…_" He thought miserably.

James glared at him, though he tried to silently explain why he was ignoring Sirius but unfortunately, James did not posses telepathy.

Sirius watched him walk out the portrait hole then sat sadly back in a chair of the common room. A few people were about; some gave him sympathetic looks or said things like 'better luck next time'.

"I'm an idiot guys…I shouldn't have tried to be controlling…damn, he hates me…" Sirius said desolately as he put his face in his hands.

Peter and James exchanged looks.

"Ah, cheer up Sirius…" Peter said slowly.

Sirius sighed heavily but did not look up from his hands and silence passed, however, it was broken up by the arrival of someone.

James smiled and moved over "Lily!"

She smiled back "Hey guys, mind if I hang out with you? I've caught up with all my work and don't really have anything else to do. So I thought 'well, you guys are always having fun'."

James grinned, "Ah Evans, you're making us blush."

"Oh dear, what's wrong Sirius?" she asked, noticing Sirius for the first time.

Sirius did not look up from his hands "Complete idiot…" he muttered.

"Just ignore him; he's still hung up over Remus." He whispered in her ear.

She frowned slightly and leaned forward to Sirius "…You wanna talk about it?" she asked softly.

That made Sirius slowly lift from his hands. No one really asked him if he'd wanted to talk about his problems before, let alone kindly as that and just to be kind, not out of stupid curiosity for gossip. Well, aside from Remus but…thinking about him made his heart hurt.

Sirius sighed and recalled what had happened a few days before.

James and Peter listened and were slightly repulsed by how sad and mush this sounded. Mush or not, Lily seemed to actually be listening.

"I wasn't trying to be controlling, I was just worried about him! But now, he hates me, so I'm making this big present for him but…part of me's afraid that…even if I give him this present he still won't want to talk to me…that he won't like me and…well, I don't know what I'd do if he didn't…" he hugged himself sadly, James nearly gagged.

"UGH! God Sirius, you're gonna make me heave! Did you have to turn into such a girl?" he muttered, getting a well aim punch in the ribs for it.

Lily frowned "Hm…well, have you tried apologizing?"

"Loads of times! He always finds some excuse to leave or just ignores me completely!" Sirius said bitterly.

Lily looked up thoughtfully, obviously wanting to help Sirius "Hmmm…what if, I mean, now don't do anything stupid but…what if you got him in a position where he couldn't just run off?"

James almost fell out of his chair "Lily!"

Sirius, however, looked intrigued "What do you mean exactly?"

She bit her lip, starting to regret ever opening her mouth "Well…just, corner him, er, so to speak- I mean, no um, don't do that! Um…just…you know, never mind, forget I said anything! I don't know what I'm talking about!"

But Sirius looked thoughtfully out the window "No, no…I think you've got something there…what if, I get us both in detention or something…yeah, then he wouldn't be able to escape! No wait, then he might just get even angrier with me. Wait…hm…"

Lily glanced apologetically at James who was giving her a look that screamed 'What the hell?! Why'd you tell him that!?' as Sirius put a hand thoughtfully to his head, suddenly he snapped and a huge smile came to his face "I've got it! Oh yes, that's perfect! Thanks Lily!" and he ran out the portrait hole.

Lily cringed "Sorry I…I just wanted to help."

James groaned, "Well if this doesn't piss Remus off I don't know what will…"

---

Surprisingly enough, the next time they saw Remus was at lunch and he wasn't fuming at all about some crazy thing Sirius had done to try apologizing to him. In fact, he actually came over to them this time.

"Is Sirius with you?" he asked softly, not wanting to draw attention.

James frowned, still angry about his current behavior "Well I don't know, you see him?"

Remus gave him a look "He's not wearing the cloak?"

Peter shook his head "No."

Remus smiled slightly "Oh good." and sat down next to Peter.

"Hm, now see, I don't remember asking you to sit down." James huffed.

Remus sighed "Look could you just hear me out first? I'm sorry I've been snubbing you, but you've got to understand…" he began telling them about his plan to stay away from Sirius for his reputations' sake.

"-And I thought if I told you guys you might blab it off to Sirius if I told you, so I just kept away from all of you." He finished.

Peter nodded "Ohhh…well, that makes sense. Still, I think you should've told us so we'd know."

James sighed "Yeah…sorry bout the harsh greeting then…"

Remus smiled "Its fine. But on a more important note, where is Sirius?" James and Peter exchanged looks that right away made Remus uncomfortable "What? Guys, what is it?"

Peter bit his lip "Welllll…"

"He's…probably working on your birthday present or…" James paused.

Remus frowned "Or what?"

"Er…well…he's trying to think of a way to apologize to you and…well…we don't know what exactly he's gonna do but…it sounded kinda big and…" Peter trailed off and stared at the ground nervously, as though Remus might explode with the new information.

However, his reaction was actually quite calm.

Remus put his hands over his eyes "Great…"

---

End A/N: Ahh! I'm so sorry, this chapter's all short and not up to standard but I really didn't have time! Hope you guys can be understanding, the next one is TONS better, I swear! Sorries! ;


	14. Chapter 14

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Whew, sorry bout last chapter, seriously, I had to rush to get it up 'cuz I'm gonna be goin' to my dad's and he's like a computer nazi or something! 'No computer for you!' So this'll be my last update until, probably Monday. Sorries! Nothin' I can do about it. Hope this chapter's good enough to keep you satisfied till then! Sorry. TT

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam and anything else that J.K hasn't claimed in this fic.

**Chapter 14**

The new information about Sirius' attempt to win him over made Remus a little antsy, however, it wasn't nearly as big a surprise to him as the fact Sirius actually **gotten** him a present. Personally, if anyone had treated him like he had been treating Sirius recently, he wasn't about to go and get them a birthday present.

"_That's really nice of him…what if…maybe he does-_"

"Potion." He reminded himself before he could finish the thought.

It's always the goddamn potion! Sirius didn't really love him, he just did anything he could to be with his obsession, him. And that; was not love. Big difference, as he had to constantly remind himself, though that stupid part of him desperately wanted not to remember.

Days went by and though Sirius did seem sad when Remus would ignore him, he seemed to have something planned because whenever he did he'd immediately smile right after.

And then, finally…it the big day came.

---

Remus yawned as the sun woke him up. According to his mom he was born at 9:04 in the morning and, seeing as today was a weekend, he'd slept in and it was about 8:45.

No one else was in the dorm.

He scratched his head tiredly and got out of bed. He was looking much more pale then usual.

"Full moon tonight." He reminded.

But, if the full moon was that night, then his birthday was today and…sure enough, at the end of his bed there was a small pile of presents stacked neatly with tags saying who they were from.

Remus shrugged "Well, while I'm here I suppose." and sat down at the end of his bed, pulling the present on top to him.

This one was from James…it was a book about Quidditch, not so much the players, but more the history of the game and how it came about.

Remus smiled "Typical, but thoughtful. I'm sure it'll make a good read."

Setting his new book aside he got Peter's gift…at least a dozen Randal's Terrific-Toffee (changes the color of your tongue with ever piece)! Remus chuckled; Peter always got him sweets for his birthday. The amazing thing was he always managed to get him a different sweet every time!

He was pleasantly surprised to see Lily had gotten him something as well. It was a book on potions, most of which were meant to bring color to your face. He read the note attached 'Hey Remus, thought you'd like this, you always look so pale, I figured this could help you out'.

He smiled "As thoughtful as that is, I don't think it'll work on a werewolf…"

With her present out of the way he noticed there was one left. Just as he was about to grab it though, he saw the name of who had sent it. Samantha Briken. He stared at the gift suspiciously.

Very cautiously, he touched the edge of the wrapping paper with his finger. Immediately he pulled back "Ah!" a slight boil began to form on his finger. He put it in his mouth to relieve some of the pain.

He frowned "Oh honestly! That girl needs to grow up…" he got his wand from the counter and moved the gift into the garbage where it belonged and would harm no one.

With her gift gone there were no more. He frowned slightly "Hm…"

Not that it mattered or anything but…well, there was no gift from Sirius amongst his friend's gifts and it was…somewhat disappointing.

He sighed "Well, I can't really blame him can I? I've been a total jerk to him."

But still…oh, never mind that. Now that all his gifts were opened he could see no better time to take a good shower. Seeing as breakfast could wait, he got his clothes together and went off to the bathroom.

Once he got out the clock on the counter said it was now 9:00 exactly.

He smiled to himself "Four more minutes to go."

As he waited for the clock to strike 9:04, his thoughts traveled back to his current home and what a birthday there would be like. His mom probably would've woken him up like it was an average day and act as though she'd forgotten what day it was.

He smiled; she had often done that in the past.

-Flashback-

_A much smaller Remus woke up excitedly, barely able to sleep the night before. He hopped out of bed happily and ran into the kitchen, where it sounded like his mom was making breakfast._

_He grinned, "I'm up!"_

_She looked over her shoulder casually "Oh, so you are. Well, I was going to wake you up in a few more minutes, but seeing as you are up, why don't you help me set the table."_

_Remus looked confused and hurt at her casual behavior "…Ok…" he said sadly._

_He reached in the cabinet and put the cups and plates at the table. His father came up, tying a tie around his neck as he did. Remus smiled, surely he'd remember!_

"_Hey dad!" he said happily._

_He looked up with a warm smile "Doin' alright Remus?"_

_He nodded "Yeah. Hey, isn't there something…__**special**__ you wanted to say to me?"_

_His dad tilted his head "Special?"_

"_About what day it is?" Remus pressed hopefully._

_His father looked up thoughtfully then slowly smiled "Ahhh, oh yes, I do."_

_Remus grinned; good old dad._

"_Today's a short shift at work, I'll be home around noon!" he said to his wife._

_Remus' smile fell and he sadly returned to setting the table. Once it was done he thought he'd go upstairs and be alone for a while, not feeling at all hungry, however, just as he left his mother called him back "Oh Remus, before you go…"_

_He came back in and gasped in surprise. His mother held the best looking cake he'd ever seen in his short life and balloons were all around the room and a special birthday breakfast was on the table._

_His father and mother smiled warmly and began singing 'Happy Birthday'. His bright eyes filled with happy tears as he hugged his parents tightly "Oh mom, dad!"_

_His father ruffled his hair lovingly and laughed "What? You didn't expect us to forget the birthday of the best kid ever born, did you?"_

_His mother giggled, "Alright, that'll do. Now come on, let's eat breakfast so you can open your presents!"_

_Remus smiled and sat at the table with his parents._

-Flashback ends-

This was the birthday before he got turned into what he was and it was the best one he ever remembered having. He sighed and wondered what his mom had gotten him.

Of course his dad didn't get him anything. He made it a point to pretend Remus didn't exist most the time. His mother always said that him calling Remus 'the best child ever' might get to his head, but never _really_ tried to stop him from saying it and now, he never said it at all.

Part of him wondered what having a birthday at home would be like with his father…probably the same except his dad would be sure to be working late so he won't have to stay and talk or even wish him a happy birthday…

He frowned slightly "That's enough of that. It's my birthday; I have no right being depressed today."

He walked down stairs to have breakfast, surprised as a few people called out 'happy birthday'. Some people he didn't even know said it and he couldn't help but wonder how they found out.

"Hey, it's his birthday."

"I wonder what Black's got planned for it."

"Did they get back together?"

"I'm not sure."

"I've heard that he's been avoiding Black, but maybe…"

He overheard a group of girls chattering as he passed by them. They stopped talking as he got closer and a few even smiled and one said "Happy birthday." as he left.

"_That was…strange…_" he thought.

He came up to the Great Hall and made his way to his normal seat unthinkingly. What mostly made him sit there was that a light brown barn owl with bright yellow eyes was waiting there, clicking at James for some of his toast.

"Hey Rem, where've you been? This owl's been waiting here for ya." James said as he sat down.

Remus smiled at the sight of his family's owl "Ah, hey Thoren. Where's Sirius?" he asked, just noticing he was nowhere to be seen again.

Both Peter and James shrugged but didn't really seem to give it much thought. They were more interested in his mother's owl that held a package tied to his leg and a card in his beak.

"I thought your mom said she wasn't going to give you your gift till you got home." Peter said.

Remus smiled "She is. This is just one of her cakes." And sure enough, when he opened the package it was a small, personal sized carrot cake with the words 'happy birthday Remus' on it in green icing.

He smiled and pulled the card out of Thoren's mouth. When he opened it, his mother's voice filled the Great Hall "Happy birth-day to you, happy birth-day to you. Happy birth-day dear Rem-us, happy birth-day to you! And many more!"

A few people in the hall cheered, some laughed and others just smiled. Remus smiled sheepishly as a small blush came to his face. He loved hearing his mother's voice and all, especially on his birthday, but he'd rather it be just for him to hear, not half the school.

He hated the public attention.

"Thoren you idiot, you're supposed to deliver my birthday stuff to my room." He said in mock anger, stroking the owl's feathers.

Thoren rolled his great yellow eyes but still gave him an affectionate nibble on his fingers before joining all the other owls in flight and going out the window after taking a few drinks of water.

Once the post had left, breakfast went on pretty much as it normally did for the Marauders, besides the absence of Sirius. He noticed Sam seemed a little shocked at his appearance.

He smirked and waved with his boil free hand. She frowned deeply and turned away angrily, her hair acting as a sort of shield so she didn't have to look at him. Remus couldn't help laughing.

James looked down at Sam then back at him "What was that about?"

Remus sighed and explained what had happened with the gifts. "Apparently, she thinks I'm an idiot because she put her name on the gift and still expected me to open it!" He finished with a laugh.

James shook his head "Attacking a man on his birthday, that's low."

"Yes well…bugger on her. And the swelling in my finger seems to have gone down anyway so even if I did open it, it probably wouldn't be too bad. By the way, thanks for the presents guys." He added.

James shrugged with a smile "Well, I figured you'd like something _good_ to read up on."

Peter grinned, "Did you try the blue one? I swear, that color stays the longest! I brushed my tongue for 2 hours and it still stayed blue for 5 days!"

Remus smiled "I'll try it later." But at that thought his smile faltered and he looked down at the table.

Why did it bother him that Sirius didn't get him a present?

"_Don't answer that._" He thought before he could start the never-ending argument on his feelings towards Sirius.

James raised an eyebrow "You ok?"

He looked up "Hm? Oh, oh yeah…I'm fine."

"Ohhh, I see. It's the moon thing huh?" Peter said knowingly.

Remus nodded absentmindly "Yeah, yeah that's it…"

He smiled "Well, you don't have to worry because- OW!"

James kicked him in the knee but luckily, Remus didn't seem to be listening. He was staring distantly at the ceiling as though he were thinking about something interesting.

"Shut up, you want Sirius on you for telling him?" James hissed.

Peter nodded "Oh right…by the way, where is he?"

James shrugged "How the heck should I know? He doesn't tell me anything any more!"

As if an answer to their question the door to the Great Hall opened. Sirius came in with a sort of solemn determined look on his face, which confused his fellow Marauders.

Others whispered to one another as they watched him walk to the front. The three friends looked at one another, silently asking if any of them knew what was up with Sirius.

No one did.

To add to their shock, he walked right passed all the tables without looking at them to give them any sort of sign to what he was about to do and walked right up to the teacher's table.

His coming up to their table equally surprised the teachers. Perhaps they thought he was going to ask one or all of them something because they allowed him to come up.

However, he did not come to ask a question. Once at the top and in front of the whole hall he turned to face the hundreds of students and point his wand at his throat muttering "Sonorus."

"Excuse me everyone," his voice boomed, causing the entire Hall to go silent. "I have something very important to say and the fact that I'm saying it in front of all of you is proof that **I'm ****not**** joking**!" he shot a quick glance in Remus' direction.

Remus face went a bright shade of red and he felt himself lowering in his chair "Oh god…please, tell me he's not-"

"I have to say this. I'm sorry." The entire hall was silent as his voice echoed, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! It was stupid of me to say what I said to you and act like some…over-protective dog! I've been foolish and I know it and I'll stay up here and apologize all day if I have to but please, don't ignore me any more! I'm really sorry, please forgive me?" he looked imploringly at Remus.

The eyes of the entire hall followed his and they stared at Remus too, who, at the moment appeared to be trying to melt into the floor, his face completely red in embarrassment.

"I know I'm not perfect. Our past few dates have all ended up in you getting injured but I tried! I'm still trying and I'll always try to do everything I can for you. Anything you want, anything, I'll try my hardest to get it to you because…"

Remus closed his eyes and covered his face "Please don't say it…"

"Because I love you. And I don't care what anyone else has to say about it! They can sneer and hate all they want, that doesn't change anything. In fact, I think they're just jealous. Jealous that I love you so much and that I don't care what gender you are…" he sighed "And that's really all I have to say…" but as he turned to leave he suddenly stopped as though he remember something "Oh, and also, it is your birthday so I think we should-"

"Silenco!" Remus suddenly shouted, making all eyes go to him once more.

Sirius staggered slightly as the spell hit him, but was silent. Ignoring the gasps of surprise and murmurs he marched up the front and grabbed Sirius roughly by the sleeve of his robes, disregarding his questioning look and attempts to speak.

Either the teachers were too shocked to act or didn't care either way for none of them did anything as Remus pulled him out of the Great Hall. He didn't stop marching until they were out of the castle and away from hearing ears.

Once they were, he rounded on Sirius "WHAT, IN GOD'S NAME IS WRONG WITH YOU!?!"

Sirius pointed his own wand at his throat and mouthed a spell.

"What do you mean? I was just apologizing!" he said as soon as he could speak.

"And you think publicly humiliating me is going to make me forgive you!?"

"NO! I just wanted you to know I was serious about what I had to say! And anyway it was the only way I could talk to you, considering how you've been treating me lately!" he said bitterly.

Remus covered his eyes "Ugh, Sirius don't you try making me feel guilty about this…"

Sirius frowned "Well it's true! Every time I tried to talk to you, you just avoid me or ran away from me! I didn't know what else I could do; you weren't exactly leaving me many options!"

Remus sighed tiredly "Look I…I'm sorry, ok? But you can't just…I mean…ugh, this is too confusing…"

The anger in Sirius' eyes died completely "What's confusing?"

"You! You're confusing me!" he muttered; talk more to himself then to Sirius.

Sirius blinked in confusion but didn't ask. A long silence passed between them. Sirius tried to catch Remus' eye but he was distracted, arguing inside his own head with himself.

"Sorry though, I wasn't trying to embarrass you...just talk to you..." Sirius muttered, in an attempt to get his attention.

Remus sighed and reluctantly looked back at him "Well…no use crying over spilt milk I suppose…ok, ok…I forgive you Sirius and I hope you can forgive me for being the world's biggest prat. I'm sorry too."

Sirius grinned widely and hugged him tightly "Oh thank you! You're too good, you know that? And I mean it, I'm sorry. I promise, I'll never try to be controlling again! I was just worried for you, course, that's no excuse."

Red returned to Remus' face "(Ahem), yes well…um…you're welcome…so, let's go back inside then?"

Sirius nodded and released him. As they walk though, Remus made a sort of face "Still, one thing…bothers me…" he paused as though he weren't sure if he should talk about it.

"What's that?" Sirius asked happily.

Remus messed with his hands nervously "Well…you wanted to apologize and all right? So then why…er…"

"Why what?" he now sounded slightly more curious.

"Well…not that it matters or anything but…why didn't you, well…get me a birthday present?" he muttered awkwardly, trying not to sound upset by it, even though secretly he sort of was.

Sirius could suppress a grin when he looked over at Remus. He was looking intently at the ground, absolutely determined not to catch his eye, his face slightly red.

"You're so cute!" Sirius said, putting an arm around him.

Remus was taken aback by the sudden motion but couldn't find his voice to say it.

"Ah Remus! Now honestly, what kind of boyfriend would I be if I forgot your birthday? Assuming I'm still worthy enough to have that title." he said, kissing his cheek.

Remus went redder and continued to stare at the ground "Yeah, y-you are but…well I…I didn't think you'd forget just…you'd be too mad to…get me anything…" he mumbled, his voice getting quieter with each word.

It wasn't so much a gift that he wanted, he just wanted _Sirius_ to get him something…

Sirius chuckled and shook his head "Remus, Remus, Remus…who could ever stay mad at you? True, I was a bit irked by it but, ah, I'd never leave you out like that! That's just too mean."

Remus looked up with a hopeful smile "So…you're not…I mean, you got me something?"

Sirius grinned, "Indeed I did. HOWEVER…"

The way he said that got Remus full attention as they walked "What?"

Sirius snickered "You, won't get to see it till later!"

Remus blinked "What? Why?"

He grinned broadly "A surprise Remy my dear! And you don't want to spoil the surprise do you?" Remus opened his mouth to say yes he did want to spoil the surprise but Sirius cut across "Well anyways, all's well now and…I should get going."

"Going? To where?" Remus asked, surprising himself with how saddened he sounded by the fact.

Sirius smiled at the tone "Don't worry, I'm not leaving forever or anything, but did you see McGonagall's face after that? If I don't go take my lumps now it'll be _far_ worse when she finds me."

Remus nodded "Oh right. Ok, well…I guess I'll see you later then."

Sirius smiled and gave him a quick kiss as he unwrapped his arm from him "Bye. Detention should be over in a flash so I'll probably be in the dorm tonight kay?"

Remus nodded, words failing him this time.

Sirius grinned and went back inside, closing the door behind him.

For a moment Remus stood there in a sort of dazed shock. His hand gently ran over the spot where he'd felt Sirius' lip…it was warm and tingly sort of feeling and he felt cold now that Sirius didn't have his arms around him…

"Stop it, STOP THAT!! I'm not gay!" he yelled out loud, squeezing his head tightly.

But still, no matter how much he insisted he only liked Sirius as a friend, he couldn't help but wish Sirius were still there, with his arms holding him close and-

"STOP!" he shouted angrily.

He walked in hurriedly, still telling himself ardently that he was not gay, Sirius was ONLY his friend and it was incredibly stupid that he was having this argument again when he nearly fell from walking into someone.

He reached to help the girl he knocked over up "I'm sorry I- (Gasp!)"

Her eyes narrowed "YOU!"

Remus grunted as he was suddenly forced against the nearest wall, a wand now pointed at his throat. He tried to reach down to his robe pocket to get his own wand but every inch he moved made the girl bring her wand closer to his throat.

"E-easy Sam…" he said carefully.

A look of pure loathing and rage was on her face as she stared at him. Her teeth were clenched and her hair looked wild "I don't know how…" she started in a low whisper.

"…I don't know how…and I don't know when…but mark my words Remus Lupin, I WILL get back at you for this…someday…I swear it…" she said, still holding him tightly to the wall.

"B-But I-" he started but was silenced by a noise she made.

"…However…that won't be today…you see, it's your birthday and even though I hate you with every bit of my being, I care for Sirius more and I know, that if anything happened to you today while his influenced by the potion, he'd never forgive me. So consider yourself lucky Lupin…" she said, finally releasing him.

He massaged his throat. For such a small girl she sure was strong.

"Oh, and uh…happy birthday." She muttered.

He blinked in surprise.

With a sort of nod in acknowledgement, she turned on her heel curtly and marched the way she was going before they met.

He stared after her until she was a dot and then no more. With a relieved sigh he ran a hand through his hair "I've got to stop making enemies…it'll be the death of me…" he muttered.

---

The day was over in nothing flat and everyone had now gone to their common rooms to finish homework and talk with friends as they awaited curfew.

Hours passed and the sun was beginning to set. And still Sirius wasn't back from detention. Remus walked around the Gryffindor Common room anxiously.

"_He said he'd be back so he'll be back!_" he told himself for the 5th time.

It went on like this until one by one, people trotted to bed and the common room was virtually empty besides him, James, Lily and Peter.

Lily smiled tiredly "Don't worry Remus…(yawn)…McGonagall couldn't have been too hard on him…"

Remus nodded but didn't look at her and continued his sort of pace. Why he was so worried he didn't even know, but he kept at it anyway, looking at the door every few seconds.

James had a sort of concerned look on his face but said nothing while Peter dozed a bit next to Lily.

Finally, Lily yawned a great yawn and stood up "Well…I'm really tired guys, I'll see you later."

They all said a collective good night to her as she went up to the girl's dormitory.

Remus bit his lip as he stared at the door "Come on, where is he? It's nearly time for me to go…" the moon was covered for now but he knew he'd have to go back to the Shack soon and, for some reason he had trouble explaining, he wanted to see Sirius before he did.

James watched Lily leave and a soon as he heard her dormitory door closed he jumped to his feet "I have to go to the bathroom!" and quickly left the room.

Peter jerked awake.

As James passed him it appeared he kicked him "Huh? Oh-Oh! Right…Um, I left something in the dorm, could you get it for me Remus?" he asked just as quickly as James had spoken.

Remus was still too anxious to notice or even be suspicious about it and said "Yeah…sure." and went up to their dorm. He was halfway through Peter's trunk when he realized he didn't know what he was looking for.

"Of course." He muttered and quickly went back down, feeling stupid. Still preoccupied with his thoughts, he walked back in the common room.

Once he'd entered however, he had to cover his mouth to keep from letting out a yell of surprise at what he saw.

Right there in the middle of the common room was a brown stag, with strange markings around its eyes with a rat perched on one of its antlers. And next to the stag sat a big, black dog. Remus gapped at the animals in shock.

"Am I asleep?" he murmured to himself, running a hand through his hair.

The dog barked and its tail wagged furiously as it stood up and made its way to him, howling in a sort of tune that was hard to make out.

Remus stared at the dog's gray-ish eyes and he gasped "S-Sirius?"

The dog's howl slowly changed, as did the dog itself. His snout shrank and he was soon standing upright and the howling was changed to singing "Happy birthday dear Re-mus…happy birthday to you!" he finished.

Remus' mouth was opened in utter astonishment, words failing him completely. The rat jumped off the stag's antlers and onto a chair, as it landed it turned into Peter who smiled brightly. The stag's face shrank as well and he turned into James who grinned, "Surprise!"

"I…I…how…I thought..." Remus stuttered.

Peter grinned and spoke excitedly "Sirius was really pushing us to finish in time for your birthday! He got all kinds of research! I didn't think we'd be able to pull it off if he didn't do all that work. But we did it! Happy birthday Remus! Oh man, it's so cool being an animal! We've even come up some nicknames for ourselves in animal form to, mine's Wormtail!"

James gave Peter a look but still smiled at Remus "Prongs."

Sirius grinned broadly "Padfoot. And now, Moony, I think it's about time you went down to the shack huh? Don't worry; we'll join you as soon as Madam Pomfrey leaves."

Remus stumbled into a chair and put a hand to his forehead "I…I don't believe I…I…you…you did all this…for me?"

James shrugged modestly and kicked the air "Well…Sirius did a lot of the work…"

Remus looked up at Sirius who was smiling down at him in a loving sort of way "I just figured that…after the talk we had, the best gift I could give you was someone to be there with you, so you wouldn't be alone anymore…" he said in a soft sincere voice.

And it happened.

Without stopping to think that James and Peter were right there, that they were in the common room and anyone could just walk in at that moment, without remembering all the logic that told him it was wrong, Remus got out of his chair and pulled Sirius' lips to his with so much force it caught him completely off-guard.

It took Sirius a moment to comprehend what just happened but once he had he wrapped his arms around him and pulled him firmly into the kiss. The moment was complete bliss. The argument had been settled and there was no more denial about it. Remus loved Sirius and nothing anyone said was going to change that.

How long they stayed like that it was hard to say. 5 minutes 5 seconds…5 years? Who cared! Time had stopped just for that perfect moment Remus would never forget as long as he lived.

Peter stared in opened mouthed shock while James went a sort of white-ish color. Then, as if realizing what he was doing, Peter went pink and stared at the ground embarrassedly. James cleared his throat loudly.

Sirius pulled his lips away from Remus "What?" he snapped impatiently.

James frowned and pointed at the window where the clouds covered the full moon "We're on a bit of a schedule here! Need I remind you why we became Animagi in the first place?"

Remus got out of Sirius grip "Oh, of course. Um, sorry…"

It got uncomfortably silent for awhile in which Remus felt his face go red as if he suddenly remembered what he'd just done, Sirius looked extremely disappointed and James and Peter felt like they were intruding on something.

Finally, Remus clapped his hands together "Well! Uh…thanks for the gifts." He said slowly, looking around at his friends and smiling "I guess, I'll see you out there then!" and hurried out the door to the hospital wing, where Madam Pomfrey was waiting to take him out to the Whomping Willow.

As he walked out he distinctly heard Sirius mutter sullenly "Thanks James."

The fact that Sirius was disappointed to see him leave filled him with a greater sort of happiness he'd never felt before. A broad grin was on his face as he walked outside with the school nurse.

_This,_ had to be the best birthday he'd ever had.

---

End A/N: YAAAY! PHEW! That was a doozy eh? Well, that's all for that chapter but stay tune, I swear I'm not done yet!


	15. Chapter 15

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! I am sooo sorry for the wait, hope you all are still around. Thanks for being patient, having divorced parents sucks big time. But I'm back now and here's chapter 15! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.

**Chapter 15**

The next few weeks had to be some of the most wonderfully painful days Remus could ever remember. No longer being in denial with his feelings for Sirius, he spent more time with him, which made them both smile.

But, the horrible truth of it was, he knew it wouldn't last.

The voice of logic had not died out from him mind, it was merely stuffed in the back of his thoughts and would occasionally pop up to remind him that once the antidote was done Sirius would be back to normal and it would be as though this time had never happened, and possibly be awkward enough to destroy their friendship.

And James was no help to his predicament, acting as a second conscious to him.

"You said you didn't really like him!" he said angrily.

Remus sighed "I know."

"It was just pretend!"

"I know."

"He's under a potion!"

"I know!"

"Ronts is near done with the antidote by now and once he's back to normal, it'll be…weird!"

"I know, I KNOW! Thank you James, is there any OTHER obvious things you'd like to point out to me?! Like the sky's blue or that Muggles can't do magic?!" He finally shouted.

James frowned "Don't give me that! I'm just trying to help you out before you get in this to deep! You're the only one who's going to get hurt out of this!"

Remus sighed and ran a hand through his hair "I…know, James; I know you're just trying to help me but…I'm not sure I want it. I mean, for the first time in a long time, I'm really happy. I mean REALLY happy! God I…I haven't been this happy since…since…since my dad was still speaking to me! More then that even! James, it's something I've never felt before! And I don't want to know the truth! Can't you just let me fall into it?"

James stared at him in disbelief "Let you…Remus what about when he's cured!? Don't you think it'll be a bit awkward if when he's better you still feel stuff around him?"

Remus looked down at the ground sadly "Everyday I do…its killing me…but when'll I ever get this chance again? Never that's when. I need to enjoy Sirius while I can before I never get the chance again…"

James groaned, "I don't get you! First you were freakin' out because he 'loved' you and couldn't wait for the antidote and now you're stooping as low as to stop Ronts from finishing it!"

They were having this conversation up in the dorm now but this was only after James had caught Remus sneaking into the Potions Chamber to tamper with the antidote and had dragged him up there. And this, was almost like an 'as your punishment' speech.

"You were so reluctant to pretend! It was just pretend!" James shouted.

Remus sighed "But that's the thing James, I don't think it ever really was…"

"WHAT?!?"

He sighed and rubbed his temples "It's…difficult. I mean, it started as pretend but…I didn't tell you about that day, when Sirius nearly cracked my skull open. Something…happened. I dunno. It was when he was talking to me…how much he trusted me. As a werewolf you don't get that kind of trust, ever! I told myself it was the potion but my stupid heart didn't believe it was and…James…you didn't see his eyes…you didn't hear his voice…and even if it's not true I…I couldn't help it. You don't understand, you can't! It's different because you've actually had someone try going after you before, but me? I've **never** heard anyone talk to me like that before, no one's ever even _tried_ to get that close to me like he has been and…well, I guess it just got to my heart. Honestly, I think I've always had a soft spot for Sirius and after that it…well, it sprouted into something more. Something I couldn't explain but…but something that…I think may have been there all along…"

James had a look of somewhat horror on his face "S-so…you've always been…well you know…"

Remus groaned, "Oh, I don't know James! I see other guys in the shower, that one idiot Hanes even went in naked and the only thing I could think about was how stupid he was for only doing it for 9 Gallons! I didn't feel anything when I saw anyone else but…but with Sirius it…it was different. You could get naked right now and I won't feel a thing! It's not a physical thing with Sirius. We could just be lazing about, not even talking but if it's together…it's the best feeling in the world! I don't know; I don't know ANYTHING for sure any more!"

James stared at him for a long time "…" unable to say anything to that. He couldn't say anything because he knew the feeling, he'd felt and was still feeling that way towards Lily.

He remembered all the times he'd see her and long just to walk with her…watch her eat and wish he were there with her. He remembered the pain of her rejecting him so many times…and now that she was with him, he couldn't imagine letting her go…

"Remus, trust me when I say, the deeper you get in this…the more it's going to hurt getting out." He said softly.

Remus sighed "Well, then I guess I'll have to toughen up for it because I'm not going to stop being with Sirius…not when I have the chance to be."

James frowned "But **this** is **wrong**! And don't give me that look, it's not because you're gay, he's not in the right state of mind! Right now, you're taking advantage of him!"

"What else am I supposed to do James?! Don't ask me to start ignoring him again because I can't! I won't! Not again…you saw the way he was about it, I won't hurt him like that again."

James yanked a hand through his hair frustratedly "Goddammit Remus, would you just work with me?! What if you're still 'going out' when he has to take the antidote?! What then? You gonna explain that to him?"

Remus frowned "Enough! Look, I don't have to explain myself to you, so why don't you just butt out, ok? I can handle this!"

"But that's just it Rem, I don't think you can! How are you gonna be around each other after this if-"

Remus clenched his teeth "I said…I'll handle it…now, if that's all you've got to say…" he got up and turned to leave.

"You really shouldn't Rem, it's not right." James said, in one last ditch effort to get him.

Remus paused at the door and for a moment it seemed he turn around and retort…but changed his mind about it and continued out the door, slamming it forcefully behind him.

James groaned and fell back on his bed "Damn…looks like Sirius was right all along about relationships all along…'a waste of time, energy and cause to much drama' alright…"

---

Remus marched angrily out of the common room, trying to forget the conversation he'd just had with James but even if James wasn't there to say them, his words haunted him as he went.

"What'll happen to your friendship?"

"_It'll be fine! Once he's better I'll just lay off him and everything'll go back to normal!_"

"But you love him!"

"_I know I do! But…I'll just ignore it! I'll live off the memories and that'll be the end of it!_"

"Oh come on! Can you honestly say you'll be able to ignore your true feelings?"

"_I've been doing it for God only knows how long, why should now be any different?_"

"Because now; you've finally come to terms with them! Now that you know they're there, how can you just ignore it?!"

"_I'll figure it out! In the meantime, I'll just try to take up as much time as I can with Sirius…_"

"But when he's normal again-"

"_IT'LL BE FINE!!_"

"So you're willing to risk your entire friendship for this brief moment of happiness that shouldn't even be??"

He paused…was he really going to risk his friendship with Sirius just to be with him at this moment, this moment that wasn't even supposed to be? Being a werewolf friends were so seldom in life…was he really ready to lose one of the few friends he'd probably ever have?

The moment of hesitation lengthened and he suddenly saw his surroundings. He hadn't been paying attention but now he looked up to find his feet had led him outside to the lake, underneath the old tree. Why would he come here?

"…Oh yeah…" he muttered as he remembered. Sirius had told him to meet him there later so they could have a little picnic later. Remus sighed and sat on the grass, looking out at the lake.

He wanted to clear his mind, to stop thinking for a change...but the only time that happened was when Sirius was around. He groaned and covered his eyes "Damn, what am I gonna do?"

For a while he just sat in the grass, trying not to think and Sirius still hadn't come along. Just as worry was starting to work its way into his thoughts however, he spotted Sirius coming up from the other end of the castle with a basket under his arm.

He smiled as he approched and Remus stood up "Sorry I'm late Rem, the house-elves kept insisting on things I should take we got loads of stuff now."

Remus could only nod as he stared at him. His smile was so bright…brighter then Remus could ever remember seeing it when they were 'just friends'. His eyes had a sort of shine, and the sun really brought out his eyes, as well as his beautiful hair…he was breathtaking.

Sirius noticed his silence "Remus? You ok?"

The basket fell from his hand as Remus suddenly pulled him into a deep kiss. Sirius, though slightly surprised, wrapped his arms around him to hold him closer, to secure the kiss.

When they pulled apart Sirius grinned, "Not that I didn't enjoy that, but is there any particular reason for it?"

Remus smirked "What? I have to have a reason to kiss my boyfriend now?"

Sirius laughed "Not at all! Just, I've noticed that you've been really more affectionate lately."

Remus smiled "I guess it must be I've come to really love you and…well, that's pretty self-explanatory isn't it?

Sirius smiled to "Yeah, yeah…well come on, love. Help me put the blanket out."

Remus loved the warm feeling he always got around Sirius. It could be anything…cleaning the room, talking about random stuff, fixing a picnic…if Sirius was with him, it was impossible to be sad, impossible to think of even the inevitable end of all this happiness.

Once the blanket was out, they sat down and pulled the food out. After eating a bit, Sirius leaned against the tree and Remus leaned against him. Sirius grinned and snaked an around him to pull him closer.

Remus just smiled and for a moment they were silent, just enjoying each other's presence.

However, Remus stared out at the lake, the poignant question came back but more as a whisper then as a demanding yell "Well? Are you willing to risk your friendship for THIS? This moment that won't even last?"

Sirius gently kissed his cheek and whispered, "I love you."

Remus looked up at him; his eyes were sincere as were the words that came from his lips. A smile came to him as he leaned up slightly to kiss Sirius' waiting lips and whispered, "I love you too…"

And to his mind he answered "_Yes._"

---

Time went by to fast in Remus' opinion. He squeezed Sirius into every minute he could. Talking to him, kissing him, just laying around with him…all he could do to be with him.

And then one day, it became obvious that things could no longer stay the way they were.

Everyone was cleaning up after potions class. Remus was anxious to get out and see Sirius but Professor Ronts had asked him to stay after. The whole class found this very unusual seeing as (after certain events) she tried her hardest to avoid him, mostly out of guilt.

Remus was about to approach the desk but when he turned Ronts was already at him, nearly bouncing with excitement.

Before he could even ask she said, "It's near done! I've got it to the perfect temp! If you want you can smell it, it's soooo almost there! I'd wager it'd be done in a few more DAYS! Heh, you must be so relieved! Well, don't worry, I'll inform you right away when it's done, ok?"

Remus glanced at the doorway where Peter and James were waiting for him; both started to whisper to one another. He looked back at Ronts and struggled to force a smile "Great. Um, thanks…"

He felt as though his world was crashing down on him. He didn't look back at Ronts as he made his way to the door. James and Peter had near identical looks of sympathy.

"Remus-" James started.

But Remus held up a hand "Don't. I said I'll handle this and I will…(sigh)…I know what I have to do…"

James smiled encouragingly "Well, just so you know, we'll be in the dorm. You know; if you need to talk after…you know."

Peter smiled to "We're here for you."

Remus nodded solemnly "Thanks." and headed down the corridor to look for Sirius.

Sirius was already at lunch and was just about to help himself to some chicken when he saw Remus come in, looking distressed. "Rem, are you ok?" he asked, but his question went unanswered.

Remus pulled him up from the table and without saying a word, nearly dragged him out of the Hall. His heart felt like it'd explode. Now was the time, and he knew what he had to do, but if it had to be done, he didn't want all those people around.

Part of him wanted to answer Sirius' questions to where they were going, was he all right and what was going on, but he felt like his throat was being crushed with every passing second and he couldn't speak.

It went on like this for a while, until they were on the 7th floor. "_Come on, come on…where is it?! I need that room! I need the room that Sirius and I hid in before from Filch! A room where no one can find us!_" Remus thought as hard as he could.

No sooner had they passed a portrait did a door suddenly appear from nowhere. Remus wasted no time to pull it open and drag Sirius in. Once inside he locked the door, it was virtually the same. Plain room with the bed big enough to fit 5 people, table, the same room.

Sirius turned to look at him, alarm etched on his face "Remus, please…tell me what's wrong."

At this he paused. He stared at Sirius with an odd expression "Come on, you can do this…just say it quick and get it over with! Say 'I'm sorry Sirius but it's not working out' then bolt!" a voice in his head shouted.

He bit his lip as the silence dragged on and Sirius continued to give him a confused stare "…Come ON! It's too late to turn back now! Ronts almost has the antidote done and if you don't break it off before she does there'll be a hell of a lot to explain to the real Sirius so just get on with it!!"

'The REAL Sirius'…he'd known all along this was fake, that it wouldn't last but…god, how he wished it hadn't ended so soon. Why had he denied it so long? He had so much time...if only he hadn't wasted it!

Remus opened and closed his mouth a few times, squeezed and unsqueezed his fists.

"I…I…I have to…I mean, we…I…" he started uneasily.

One look into Sirius' concerned eyes and his words ran away from him.

He sighed and looked away "I…I can't do it…"

Sirius blinked "Can't…what?"

Remus didn't answer and didn't look at him as he tried to catch his eye. Sirius frowned; it pained him to see Remus act like this, to see the anguish on his face even as he looked away.

Remus held his gaze with the floor, trying to straighten out his word...but then, quite suddenly, he felt a tickle at his side and fought back a laugh; this was not the time for laughing. He had to do this soon or else he'd lose his nerve to do it!

But Sirius tickled him again, causing him to snicker and take a step back and fall back on the bed. Sirius took advantage of that and got on top of him, tickling Remus without mercy, and Remus was lying back on the bed, his tawny hair tousled.

"No, Sirius, stop it!" he gasped, trying to squirm away.

"Come on, smile! I won't stop until you smile." Sirius said as he tickled his stomach.

"Hahaha, O-o-ok, ok! Hahaha, l-look! I-I'm sm-hahaha smiling!" he struggled to say.

Sirius grinned and stopped tickling him, allowing him to breath. But looking down at him like that, flushed and out of breath…it made him stay over him. Remus got the last of the laughs out of him then sighed.

"Thanks I…I needed that…" he said softly, which was true, he'd been frowning too much lately.

Sirius smiled "My pleasure love."

For a moment they stayed like that. Sirius on top of Remus, their eyes digging into each others. Slowly, Sirius bent down to Remus' ear and whispered, "Do the rules you made before still stand?"

His breath tickled Remus' ear and made his heart pound faster in his chest. A sort of smile came to his lips as he said, "No Sirius, I don't think they do…"

"Good." He barely whispered as he leaned down, capturing Remus' lips in a kiss.

---

End A/N: Well, I got nothing to add to that. Other then the obvious, I'm so evil! MWAHAHAHA! Slash is in the next chap so you better keep reading! P


	16. Chapter 16

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Glad you all like how the story's goin' so far. I'm surprised my computer didn't explode with how many of you were reviewin', thanks! That does wonders for my self-esteem and always provokes me to keep the story goin'! You make me happy! Kay, well I think I've wasted enough time babbling so I won't keep you from the fic any longer! Here's chapter 16!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.

**Chapter 16**

The passion in the kiss aroused Remus as he pulled Sirius close, deepening the kiss. As their tongues wrestled each other Sirius hand snaked its way under Remus' robe. Remus smiled and sat up slightly to remove it, reluctantly ending the kiss. Sirius kicked off his shoes and removed his robe as well, but as he was doing so, Remus squirmed from underneath him and (once he'd sucessfully gotten his robe off) switched the roles, pinning him to the bed.

Sirius grinned, "I like where this is going."

Remus growled playfully before taking his lips once more. Nibbling his lower lip and tongue, Remus' hands moved down to undo Sirius' tie and unbutton his shirt. He bit down a little hard at Sirius' jaw-line…then his neck. Sirius made a noise.

"Sorry, I hurt you?"

"No, no, just felt…ticklish."

Remus nibbled his neck lightly, this time getting no giggles and continued to undress him. Sirius pulled at some of the buttons on Remus shirt as well, but finding it hard to undo them at the pleasure he was feeling as Remus nipped at a certain spot on his neck. It made his hands shake "Ohhh…that feels good…"

Remus smiled as they were both topless and let his kisses travel lower. Sirius arched his back with a moan as Remus bit his nipple "Ahh…" he kissed Sirius' bare chest as he hands set work on his pants. He just couldn't seem to stop kissing him; he wanted to memorize how Sirius' tasted. To remember this place, remember this moment and hold it forever, because he'd probably never get the chance to have it again.

The very thought seemed to evoke more want as his kisses got more desperate and he nearly ripped his own pants and undergarments off. A sort of primal lust seemed to take over as he descended on the one below him and, without any sort of preparation, push his way inside him. The tightness overwhelmed him and he let out a low groan. Sirius bit hard on his lip "Ah! A little gentler, if you don't mind." He struggled to say.

He knew he should be gentler, but each time he pushed in and felt Sirius' grip around him, the primal instinct in him ugred him to push harder, "Sorry but…ohhh, you feel so good…" he moaned, thrusting in again. Sirius gritted his teeth, the pain was driving him insane. But as this went on, he felt himself getting used to it and it slowly morphed into extreme something else…not pain, but not exactly pleasure…

Then suddenly Sirius all but shouted as Remus hit a certain spot of nerves deep within him "Oh god! Rem…do that again…please…" Remus smiled and pressed himself back to that point achieving another throaty moan from the one beneath him. Sirius closed his eyes and pushed up to meet Remus' thrust.

This earned a lustful growl from Remus who reached down and gripped Sirius' length with one hand and pumped it in rhythm with his push. A sound of delight dripped from Sirius lips at every stroke-combined thrust "Ohhh, h-harder…ahh!" he moaned, writhing beneath him. Remus thrust got faster, stronger, Sirius felt himself nearing the end.

In fact, he was getting to a breaking point "Oooh…g-god, R-Remus…g-gonna c-come…" he panted as he mounted his climax. Driven solely by lust, Remus released his length, grabbed onto his hips with both his hands and began slamming into him in earnest. Sirius scrunched his eyes shut and let out a sort of yelp as he came, spilling his seed over both their stomach. Remus, still needing his climax wasted no slamming into Sirius willing body. As Sirius clenched around Remus every time he entered him, Remus didn't last much longer and as he came, for some reason unknown to him, he bit sharply down on Sirius' shoulder, heightening his own pleasure.

For a moment they just stayed like that, neither moving though both panting heavily.

As they began to catch their breaths, Remus gently pulled out of Sirius and layed back next him, with his head on Sirius' chest.

Sirius turned to face him, still flushed and panting slightly "Hm…heh, heh…"

Remus raised an eyebrow "What's so funny?"

Sirius laughed lightly "Well, I was just thinking…are you sure you've never done that before?"

Remus smiled slightly "Unless I have extreme memory failure, which I know I don't, yes I'm sure. You're the first…"

"_And probably only._" A sullen voice in his head added.

But he pushed it away as he got comfortable "Why do you ask?"

Sirius grinned "Well, the way you were a minute ago, it was almost like you'd done it before."

Remus sighed "To be honest, it was more instinct then anything else."

Sirius chuckled "Well, I love your instincts then...speaking of instincts, you bit me. I wouldn't have pegged you as a biter."

"Is that a problem?"

"Nah, except now, am I a werewolf to?" he asked playfully.

Remus scoffed "You know it doesn't work that way."

"Yeah, you're right. I'm not a werewolf, I'm a Sirmus! Half Sirius, half Remus." he said with a mock gasp of horror.

Remus rolled his eyes, though he did so with a smile as snuggled closer to Sirius' chest "You're an idiot...I've told you that right?"

Sirius grinned "But I'm **your** idiot!"

Remus smiled "And I wouldn't have it any other way."

"_If I could..._"

For a while, that's all they did. Just laid there in the secrete room with the big bed, wrapped in each other's arms, talking occasionally, but mostly just laying there in silence, until sleep consumed them.

---

Hours went by and James sat on the ground of their dorm, making a crumpled ball of paper go from one side of the room to the other while Peter lay on his bed and counted the tile on the ceiling.

Peter sighed boredly "Think he did it?" (A/N: HAHA! Sorry, that always makes me laugh! )

"He better have. I've been tellin' him the sooner he breaks it off with Sirius the better. He's getting too attached; it's only going to hurt him more if he doesn't do it soon." James muttered.

Peter nodded "Yeah…still, it's weird isn't it? I mean, this is the happiest I've ever seen Remus before."

James said nothing and silence returned to the room.

Suddenly the door opened and both boys looked up.

"Hey Remus…" Peter said cautiously.

"Hey." He said, nonchalantly going to his trunk.

James frowned "How'd it go?"

Remus stopped digging through his trunk. Both Peter and James watched as he turned around, a sort of guilty expression glossing his face "Welllll…not exactly as I planned…"

James groaned, "Don't tell me you chickened out!"

"Hey, you ever break up with anyone?! It's not exactly the easiest thing in the world! Especially when you don't even want to." Remus snapped, returning to his trunk.

"What about Ronts? Did you forget what she said? You don't got a lot of time to mull this over!"

"I know, I know! Look, will you relax? I can handle this…" he said, grabbing a cloak from within and closing the trunk. He turned back to the door "Now, if you'll both excuse me…" and walked right out again.

Peter stared at the door for a moment "…He's not gonna do it is he?"

James ran a hand through his hair "How should I know? He says he's got it but I don't think he will." James got up from the floor "Well, if Rem can't do this on his own, we'll just have to help him!"

Peter looked apprehensive; something told his this wouldn't end well.

---

The next day at lunch, the four friends ate lunch in their usual seat and nothing seemed amiss, that is, until James cleared his throat.

"So, how are things going with you guys?" he asked, looking both at Sirius and Remus.

Peter looked at James nervously and Remus shot him a warning look but Sirius just answered cheerfully "Great! In fact, people don't even seem to care about us anymore and no ones' giving Remus a hard time."

James nodded "That's good, that's good. And I take it _someone's_ not talking about a _certain something_ that needs to be discussed." He didn't look at either of them when he said this.

Sirius blinked "Wha?"

"If anyone were talking about anything I don't think it'd be any of _your_ business, James." Remus said coldly.

James looked up from his food "Oh, I'm sorry, I'm just trying to help my friend before a _**certain time is up**_!"

Remus frowned "Maybe so but considering it's _**none of your business**_, if the said friend asked you to _**butt out**_ then maybe you should!"

Peter slowly edged away from James as he to frowned and gripped his fork tightly "Perhaps I would if the certain _**someone**_ would just _**fix the problem**_ and get it over with, instead of dragging it out longer!"

Sirius looked at both them in surprise and confusion "Wait, wait, what? What are you talking about?"

"It's none of your business anyway! I'll do it on my own time so stop bugging me!" Remus said loudly over Sirius question.

"Well you're the one acting like a child! You know it's almost done but you're just closing your eyes to it!" James shouted.

Remus stood up angrily "I know what needs to be done! And I know very well time's not on my side but would it kill you to let me be content for the time being?! As I've said at least a hundred times I can handle it!"

James stood as well "Well I don't think you can! And if you can't do it then maybe someone else should!"

"Is that a threat!?"

"What if it is?!"

"What is the problem here?" a new voice said.

All four looked up to see McGonagall frowning in a disapproving fashion, her lips tight together.

Slowly, Remus sat back down "Nothing ma'am…just a tired argument that should be **left alone**." He glanced at James who scowled.

"Well, I ask that you kindly keep your voices down, least you both wish to get detention." She said smoothly before striding back to the teacher's table.

Once she had left a deadly silence followed. Neither of them had noticed that nearly all the student body had been witnessing this row and were still watching their table curiously.

It was in vain however, because none of the Marauders spoke. Peter was nearly shaking, fearing a fight would break out while Sirius looked at both Remus and James bewilderly.

James and Remus just glared at one another, as if silently continuing the recurring argument.

Finally, Remus broke eye contact by getting up and walked out of the Great Hall angrily, not glancing back at anyone as he left. Sirius watched him leave for a moment then looked back at James who was glaring daggers in his back before getting up and following him.

Once both were gone James jammed his fork angrily into his potato and mashed the hell out of it while Peter silently sipped at some soup.

---

"Remus! Remus wait!" Sirius yelled after him.

Remus could be pretty quick when he wanted to be; he was already halfway down the hall when Sirius caught up with him. He stopped at the sound of Sirius' voice but was visibly tense and obviously wanted to keep moving.

Sirius panted slightly as he caught up "Are you even going to tell me what the hell that was all about?"

Remus frowned "…I'd really rather not."

Sirius could tell by his tone he wasn't going to talk about it, but he had to try "But…why? I mean, you never fought with James before-"

"Yeah well maybe I wouldn't be fighting with James now if he'd stop acting like a stupid git and just leave me the hell alone! Why can't that bastard just mind his own damn business! I don't get mixed up in his bloody affairs unless he drags me into it! I didn't ask for his goddamn help so he should just keep it to himself!" Remus shouted; his echo near as loud as his actual voice.

Sirius stared at him for a moment, mostly out of shock. Remus seldom cursed, he must have been extremely ticked about this thing with James, whatever it was it must have been important.

Sirius smiled slightly "Well, that's just how he is. I mean, you don't have to ask him for your help, he gives it anyway."

"What if you don't want his bloody help!?" Remus practically snarled.

He was so angry he couldn't see straight. His ears kept pounding as the blood boiled under his skin. Before he could focus on his anger it nearly vanished as Sirius pulled him into a hug.

"Hey now, no need to growl at me, love…last I checked, I'm not the one who pissed you off..." he said softly.

Sirius always felt so warm and comforting, Remus' felt his anger lessen as he slowly put his arms around Sirius in turn and rested his head to his chest. Sirius was just a tad taller then him so he seemed to fit perfectly there. He closed his eyes and took in Sirius' scent…it was so perfect.

"I'm sorry…." he mumbled softly into his chest.

Sirius smiled "You think I'm the one you should be saying that to?"

Remus felt a quick serge of anger "I don't see why I should. You were there, he started it."

Sirius pulled away to look him in the eye "And you call me immature?" he said playfully.

Remus smiled but still couldn't bring himself to apologize for something that wasn't even his fault.

Sirius sighed "Come on, you can do it. Beat up the bigger man with kindness, or whatever it is you're always telling us to do."

Remus chuckled, "That's BE the bigger man and kill them with kindness, I don't know how you could mixed them up."

Sirius smirked "Forgive me for not being fluent in old sayings."

This made Remus laugh a little, he knew this wasn't a laughing matter, but Sirius always had this way of making bad situations somewhat better, funny. He had this talent even before the potion, it was one of the things everyone liked about him.

Remus sighed "…but, he's such a…gah, why can't he just butt out?"

"Because he's James. If he's friends got a problem he does everything he can to help out." Sirius said as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"But that's just it! He'd be helping better if he'd stop trying to help me!" Remus muttered.

Sirius grinned, "Ah, James won't think of it that way. Trust me, if he wasn't worried about you then he'd back off. That's just how he is. Whatever this is about, he wants to help and maybe, now don't bite my head off, but maybe you should take it."

Remus looked at him for a moment then sighed and turned away "You wouldn't be saying that if you knew…"

Sirius blinked in confusion but confusion didn't last as he saw Remus' face. "_He's doing it again._" He thought. It was just like the other day, his eyes filled with sorrow and he looked completely miserable…it was enough to break Sirius' heart.

Remus bit his lip, James was right; his conscience was right but…he loved Sirius! How could he just discard him like he meant nothing to him at all? He meant EVERYTHING! Why did he have to fall in love, of all things?!

He looked up when he felt Sirius' hand intertwine with his.

"Hey…come on, things'll work out, whatever it is." He whispered softly.

Remus looked into his eyes, those gorgeous gray eyes "Oh Sirius…I wish I could just…" he looked down, how could he explain to him about the potion but that he really loved him?

Sirius smiled warmly and kissed his cheek "Come on, you need some anti-depression medicine and I've got a huge stash of Honeydukes chocolate under my bed!"

Remus gasped in mock hurt, all to glad to change the subject "And you didn't tell me sooner?"

"Well, I kind of plan to keep it so I can't have you eating it all in one setting!" he said playfully.

Remus rolled his eyes "Oh ha, ha."

Sirius chuckled and still holding Remus' hand went up to Gryffindor tower. Remus smiled as they went, though the nagging voice in his head had once more started off.

"_I don't care! I...I'm going to drag this out as long as I can..._"

But then, how long would that be?

---

End Note: KAY! Yes, you're 'something bad' senses were correct! Seriously, half the reviews in last chapter said 'slash good but I've got a bad feeling about it'. It was funny. Bittersweetness huh? It's one of my favorite tools! Well, you liked/hated the chapter? Tell me, click the purple button! Review and I'll update!


	17. Chapter 17

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Hehehe, the story's starting to heat up a bit eh? Well, I won't keep you from reading any longer so here's chapter 17! Enjoy.

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.

**Chapter 17**

The rest of that day was pretty tense. James and Remus were reluctant to be in each other's company longer then a class hour and poor Peter was forced in the middle of them.

"Peter, please ask that jackass to pass the sheers." James said coldly.

Peter swallowed hard "Um, Remus? James wants the-"

"Tell the asshole that I'm using them right now!" he snapped.

Peter turned "James, Remus says-"

"Tell that dipshit that I need to clip the branch off our plant!"

"Remus-"

"Tell that git that he can have them when I'm finished!"

"Jame-"

"You can tell that moron that I wouldn't even ask for them if we didn't have to share!"

Peter had barely opened his mouth when Remus shot "Well you can tell that prick that maybe the sheers can cut through more then plants!"

James stood up "You threatening me?!"

"No, I was just stating a possible fact, though it certainly seems I might be!" Remus snarled.

"Alright, alright! Now that's enough of this! Potter, go to Jakin's table. 15 points from Gryffindor!" the Herbology teacher finally shouted.

James scowled "Gladly! Nice going dog-dung!"

Remus frowned "Excuse me, but I believe you weren't talking to me! I was actually enjoying it."

James looked ready to tackle him but seemed to resist the urge and instead sent him an obscene gesture.

"Oh, now really! 5 more points! Potter, move!"

But Herbology was only the beginning. In every other class after they seemed unable to go without making one harsh comment or a rude shove. The news of their constant fights traveled around school, it seemed like the end of the Marauders.

"Sirius what are we gonna do? It's like they're gonna tear each other apart!" Peter whined during their break hour.

He'd managed to lose James in the passing hour and looked for the only other person who'd be able to stop this war, Sirius, who was in their dorm.

Sirius sighed and paced the room "I dunno. I've tried talking to Remus but he just refuses to fix this! Honestly, I never would've guessed he was so stubborn…he's just determined to stay angry."

Peter sighed, "James is no better. This sucks, I feel like I'm losing all my friends!"

"Ah come on Pete, you still got me!" Sirius said, patting him on the back.

"Yeah, and you've got Remus and James only wants me around to help him bash Remus or as an audience! And Remus is almost always in a foul mood so he's not all that great to hang out with anyway…" he muttered.

Sirius winced but couldn't think of anything to say to him because…well, it was kinda true!

"We gotta do something or the Marauders'll be no more." Peter said sadly.

Sirius nodded "Yeah…but what? I mean, they're both being to damn stubborn! I tried talking to James the other day and he practically called me a traitor or something. I dunno, it was weird. He was like 'it's your damn fault anyway' and stuff."

Peter stiffened.

No…he wouldn't…James wouldn't tell him…even if he was angry, James would be stupid enough to actually _tell him_…not after what they saw happened with Samantha (1)!

"Um…did he say, anything else?" he asked timidly.

Sirius shook his head "No. Just marched off, mumbling to himself."

Peter sighed out of relief "Oh, good."

Sirius raised an eyebrow "Why? Is this…wait…are they fighting cuz of me?"

"WHAT?! No! No, no, no, no, no! No, of course not! Why would they be fighting about you?" Peter said, perhaps a bit too quickly.

"Well, it's just that Remus won't tell me what they're even fighting about and James said 'it's all your fault' and then there's the fact that you're acting all weird when I mention it so what else have I to go on?"

Peter looked around the room nervously "Um…uhhh…hey look! Doesn't that cloud look like a Horn-nose Graphler? You know, those things that Xin Lovegood's always talkin' about?"

Sirius frowned "Peter…you know what's going on."

It wasn't a question.

Peter backed up "Um…uh…I…d-d-dunno what y-you're talkin' about!"

"Yes you do! You know what they're fighting about! Tell me! Don't leave me in the dark! What's goin' on?!" Sirius demanded.

Peter said nothing, but looked guiltily at the ground.

Sirius' eyes widened "My god…it…it really **is** about me, isn't it? Well…what'd I do? Peter, what'd I do to get them fight?"

"Look, let's just forget about that, the reason why's not important! What is important is getting them to stop fighting, right?" Peter said as calmly as he could manage.

Sirius frowned and was about to start hounding him until he told him what was going on, when another voice said "Peter's right."

Peter, out of instinct, ducked with a yelp while Sirius spun around to see who said that "Lily?"

She smiled and held up her hands "I come in peace."

"You know what's going on?" Sirius asked in surprise.

She scoffed and rolled her eyes "How can I not know? Captain fathead won't stop bashing Remus for more then 5 minutes and that's when he's talking to me, his girlfriend. This is getting stupid; we've got to do something."

Sirius smirked "Why Lily Evans I'm surprised at you, I thought you stopped calling James that one."

"Well he's getting his old nickname back if he keeps this up. So, what're we gonna do?" she asked, sitting on the edge of Sirius' bed.

Sirius resumed pacing "Well, it's obvious talking to them won't do any good…hm…well…maybe if we…no…"

"Maybe we could just knock some sense into them!" Peter said, pulling out his wand.

Lily chuckled "I'm pretty sure that's just an expression Peter. If we do that then it'll just have them not only angry but bruised as well."

Sirius raked a hand through his hair "Lily's got a point. Um…er, let see…well, what if…what if…no…no, no that's dumb…"

---About an hour or so later---

Sirius sighed "Well, I got nothing."

They'd all been batting ideas around but no one seemed to really have anything that'd work.

Lily groaned, "That's not good enough! Come on, we don't want they're friendship to end forever!"

"Well it's not like we can just reminded them of why they're friends in the first place!" Peter said frustratedly.

Lily and Sirius both gasped and looked at Peter "That's it!"

He blinked "What?"

Sirius grinned, "That's it, that's perfect! We'll just have to remind them why they're friends in the first place!"

Lily hugged the dumbfound Peter "Oh brilliant idea Peter!"

"Wait, wait, wait! How will we do that?" he said still surprised that an irritated yell turned into an idea.

Sirius sighed, "Well, that's the hard part…hm…"

"We could do a skit about how they first met." Lily suggested.

Sirius smirked "Always the artsy stuff with you huh?"

She frowned "Well, I don't see YOU coming up with anything!"

Sirius put a hand to his chin thoughtfully then slowly smiled; a devious sort of smile "Wait right here, I've got an idea!"

Peter looked at Lily "You ever get chills when you see him smile like that?"

She nodded "Chills, or pity for whoever the victim is."

---

Remus sighed "Come on Sirius, where are we going?"

"It's a surprise!" Sirius' sing-song voice rang in his ears.

He sighed but couldn't help but smile. Sirius had found him in the library (he went there to cool off after his last torture hour with James) and put a blindfold over him and was leading him…somewhere.

"Ok, left!" he heard and felt a tug on his robe sleeve in that direction "Uh-ha…right, now we're comin' up some stairs so take my hand."

Remus felt his hand and lifted his leg up so as not to trip on the first step.

"Op, careful! The stair's not that high!" he'd nearly fallen from over-stepping.

He groaned, "I wouldn't have to be careful if you'd take the blindfold off!"

His only response was a laugh and a kiss on the cheek.

As they walked up the stairs, Remus blindly intertwined their fingers with a smile.

"_Boy I'm gonna miss being able to do this…_" he thought wistfully.

Ronts wasn't kidding when she said she'd keep him informed, she's pop up at random moments and tell him how the potion was going, each time breaking his heart a little.

Whether James was right or not, Remus was going to drag his relationship with Sirius out as long as he could.

He frowned and the thought of James "_What a jerk…_" he thought.

Suddenly they stopped and Remus heard a voice say "Password?"

"Hm? We're at the Fat Lady." Remus murmured.

"Oollpals. Yep." Sirius said.

Remus heard the portrait swing open and felt Sirius led him inside. He smiled when he felt them come to a stop. Judging by the sound, there was virtually no one in the common room.

He felt Sirius walk behind him and felt him yank the blindfold off but as soon as he did Remus wished he hadn't for the moment he could see his smile fell and his eyes narrowed angrily "You!"

James was across the room and apparently he to had been led here under false pretenses because at the sight of Remus he turned to go to the dorm but Lily grabbed his arm "James wait-"

"I've got nothing I want to say to HIM!" he barked.

Remus frowned "That goes double for me! Sirius what the hell is this?!"

Sirius merely smiled "An intervention love. See, we're all sick and tired of you two acting like babies so-"

"We? Who the hell's we?" James asked in a somewhat curious tone, but he tried to make it sound as angry as he could.

Sirius pointed "Peter, me and Lily."

Both groaned, "Peter you to?"

Peter frowned "Yea. Guys this has to stop, you're driving me crazy! I have both of you in near all my classes and I'm tired of being the messenger in the middle that gets ignored!"

Sirius nodded "To true Pete, to true. So now, what we've decided to do is show you exactly WHY and HOW you two became good friends in the first place, so come on, come on." He said as he sat down on the couch.

Lily sat next to him but James and Remus stood in their spots, glaring at one another.

Sirius rolled his eyes "Come on Rem! You're not even gonna have to sit next to him! See, me and Lily are right in the middle. You have to at least TRY to make up."

"I'm not trying unless he does!"

"Why should I if you're not?!"

"I will if you do!"

"No way, once I try then you won't bother!"

"You callin' me a liar?!"

"Wouldn't be the first time you-"

"ENOUGH!!!" surprisingly, Lily screamed.

She angrily pulled out her wand and pointed it silently at Remus who immediately was forced next to Sirius then grabbed James by the sleeve of his robe, pointed at the area he was about to sit then forced him down as well.

"THERE! NOW BOTH YOUR BUMS ARE STUCK TO THE COUCH SO JUST SHUT UP AND LISTEN TO WHAT SIRIUS HAS TO SAY!!!" she snarled then plopped next to Sirius angrily.

A harsh silence followed that in which all for boys stared at Lily in astonishment. She flattened her blazing red hair with a hand then glared at Sirius "Well? Go on, you've got your audience!"

He quickly tore his gaze off her "Er right! Ok, the book…um, Pet-"

"Here you go." He said quickly, almost frightenedly as he noticed Lily roll her bright green eyes at them not being prepared.

Sirius smiled "Thanks. Ok, gather round dear children as we tell a tale of old…"

"Get on with it Sirius." James said, in a tone almost as heated enough to match Lily's.

Remus glared at him "Don't talk to him that way!"

Sirius put both his hands up and blocked their view of the other "Relax, both you. We don't want to upset Lily here again. James, I'm just trying to have fun with this but if you insist on being a git then fine. It's time to be serious-Sirius now."

Despite himself James stifled a snicker.

Sirius grinned, "Doest my ears deceive me or was that a snicker from the sourpuss?"

James quickly straightened up and looked the other way off-handedly.

With no more interruptions Sirius continued, "Ok, well then, on my lap I have a photo album and in this photo album are pictures of what I like to call 'James and Remus' best moments'. This was back in 4th year when Peter was trying out photography, not really his strong suit, remember? Let's take a look, shall we?"

The first page made Lily had to cover her mouth to keep from laughing and Sirius grinned "Remember that time when I took Remus' chocolate frogs and melted them into James' shoes? Yeah, good times. And then you both teamed up to make that blister potion and poured it on me when I was asleep? Not as good but still good times…"

In the picture Sirius had huge pulsing blisters the size of small stones as he painfully chased James and Remus with his wand, shouting different spells. In the picture, the two grinned and occasionally gave each other a high-five as they ran out the door with Sirius behind them.

For a moment they both stared at the picture with something like a smile on their faces but at a sideways glance at each other they frowned and turned away from the page angrily.

Sirius smirked and went on "Next we have a classic. Oh the days of our youth. Remember the time you two teamed up to get the ingredients for said potion?"

The picture had an entire class laughing and Slughorn was teacher at that time, screaming angrily as James who'd apparently transfigured the table, having it run about the classroom still as a desk. Once he'd done it he looked up and gave a thumbs-up to Remus who snuck into his secrete stash, then came back and gave a smile and a thumbs-up in return.

This time they didn't even look at each other but snuck glances at the picture.

Sirius flipped the page "And next, oh, now who could forget this. Why, this was back when our dear James was chasing after Lily."

At that, James uncrossed his arms and looked at the picture. The picture had Lily giving him a soft kiss on the cheek then going off; once she had the picture James patted Remus on the back with a huge grin on his face.

"Oh the story behind this one. Well, once again James had failed to get Lily to go out with him. Remus, feeling bad for him, sought Lily out and talked to her about him. Well, Lily then gave our man James another chance and a kiss on the cheek when they're little get together was through and then…now, my memory's a bit fuzzy but James, what did you say to Remus after that?" he asked with a devilish innocence in his voice.

James frowned, crossed his arms and turned the other way, mumbling something that sounded like 'thank you'.

Sirius grinned, obviously loving this "Annnnd?"

James let out an exasperated sigh "And…(mumble, mumble)…"

Sirius groaned "Oh come on James! Just say it!"

"I said…ugh…"

"He said 'Thanks mate, I really owe you one! One day I'll pay you back for this so don't worry, I've always got your back' n' that we'd always be pals. Then the next day he got me a horse load of HoneyDukes chocolate." Remus said annoyedly.

It was obvious they weren't going to move on till it was said so Remus did just so Sirius would hurry up, but as he did, he caught a glance at the somewhat guilt look on James' face.

Sirius grinned "Correct! Yeah, wasn't that great? Especially since you guys have been friends ever since right?"

Both looked at Sirius, irritated and surprisingly both murmured, "Just get on with it." At that they looked up and Sirius and Lily grinned, it was beginning to work!

"Right then. Next, we have another great moment! Oh, remember that day in potions, Slughorn, when we were making the Veritaserum in class and Peter knocked down that whole row he had as examples and ended up telling all the truths he'd ever known?"

Lily had to stuff her fist in her mouth to keep from laughing as she looked at the picture and Peter's cheeks went slightly pink but Sirius was kind enough not to mention the things he reveled to the hysterical class, except…

"And as he spoke he came to a certain thing about our dear Remus…his, 'fur problem'. 'Member James?" Sirius then cast a look to both Remus and James who looked at the picture.

In the picture the class was laughing hysterically, but not at Peter, at James, who'd jumped on Slughorn's desk and started doing a sort of jig in his underwear. The only one who wasn't laughing was Remus, who was staring fearfully at Peter as he went on, unaware of what he was saying.

Sirius chuckled "Yup, in his underwear. The only way to get everyone to get their attention off Peter and laugh loud enough not to hear what he was saying! He saved your secrete that day love." He said to Remus, in a more serious tone.

Remus opened his mouth but closed it, he couldn't think of what to say about that and slowly glanced at James who was staring at him seriously "There wasn't a time I didn't hear about it for months." he said.

Remus frowned "It only made you more popular!"

Sirius chuckled "That's were you're wrong! Slughorn was Lily's favorite teacher correct? Well, you can only imagine how steamed she was when she heard what happened. But now, after seeing it, I'd say she not so much. But that's besides the point, he saved you and even if it wasn't in the best way, what did he do?"

Remus looked down guiltily "He…risked it all, just to help me…"

"Would you say you didn't want his help then?" Sirius asked.

Remus sighed and closed his eyes "…No…"

James had a look of triumph for a moment but then Lily looked to him "And James, what did Remus do for you?"

The triumphant look vanished and he glanced at his feet "Well…he…he helped me, get closer to you…"

Lily nodded "And would you have called him a jackass then or all the other stuff I've heard spewing from your mouth lately?"

James closed his eyes as well "No…"

For the first time they finally looked up and this time they held their eye contact.

James sighed "Remus…I don't wanna fight with you, you're one of my best mates so…I mean…I'm…ugh…I'm…"

"Sorry?" Remus asked.

"Ah, ah, ah! James, say it on your own…" Lily said.

James groaned "Alright, alright! I'm sorry Remus. Sorry for acting like such a prick lately…"

A small smile came to Remus face as well "It's fine, I mean, I was no better. You've just been trying to help me out…like you promised you always would. I'm sorry I've been such a git. I should have just accepted your help."

Sirius grinned "Good! Now give each other a hug…"

James frowned "Now that's where I draw the line! No, no hugging! It's unmanly…"

He chuckled "Fine, fine…handshake then."

Remus grinned as he reached out and gave James a handshake, feeling kinda stupid as he did.

Lily clapped her hands together "Great! And just in time to, next class is starting! Come on, let's go."

"Awww, but the next one is how we first met Rem!" Sirius mock whined.

Lily rolled her eyes, "Later, come on!"

Remus looked at the cushion he was sitting on "Um, we'd love to Lily but…"

"You kinda stuck us to the couch hon…" James said with a laugh as Lily's face turned an excellent shade of pink.

"Sorry." She said as she undid her spell and they stood up.

James grinned over at Remus "Ah, so off to potions then Remus old bean!"

He chuckled, "Ah! No, after you, James, my good chum!"

"Ah! Peter! Come, to potions class!" he said as Peter got up from his chair.

Peter grinned as they all filed out of the room, "It's good to have friends!"

---

End Note: Welp, I couldn't have said it better myself Pete, review please!

(1) - That was in chapter three for those of you who forgot. Seems like a long time ago doesn't?


	18. Chapter 18

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Wow, you know, I'm so happy, I'm updating twice in one day! YAY! Thank you, thank you guys so much for your wonderful reviews that just make me so happy! Well, here ya go! Chapter 18!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.

**Chapter 18**

Nothing like the renewal of friendship to put a smile on your face…until you go into your potions class where the teacher is so ecstatic about finishing an antidote that you don't even want anymore that she gives the class a free day just to spend time finishing it.

Which was Remus' problem.

He groaned "How do I tell her I don't want it anymore? She's working so hard now…she's BEEN working so hard, almost a whole month on it! And I yelled at her for the first few weeks to hurry up, how do I tell her that now I don't want it!"

James put a sympathetic hand on his shoulder "You don't, and maybe it's for the better anyway. I mean, if you love Sirius do you really want him to love you back only because of an accident?"

Peter looked fearful as Remus looked at James with an annoyed look; he really didn't want to start the last few days all over again! But, to his relief Remus just sighed and laid his head on the table "No…you're right…I feel sick…"

When they were all let out of the class Ronts held him back as she did a lot now and days "Oh Remus, this is going better then I hoped! The way it's shimmering now, it may be done even tomorrow!"

Remus eyes widened in horror "TOMORROW?!"

She hugged herself excitedly "I know! Isn't it amazing?! Just goes to show that procrastinating never pays off! If I'd waited through your…well you know, the moon then I'd never have had it by now! Don't worry, I'll let you know the instant we can administer it!" and she walked back to her desk, nearly skipping with glee, completely unaware that she'd just punctured a deep hole in Remus' heart.

He stood frozen in his spot "Yes…I guess it does show what procrastination does…" he whispered softly, looking down at the ground.

"…Remus?" James said cautiously.

As always he and Peter had stayed behind with him.

Remus sighed as he turned to face them "I-I know…I know I can't put it off any longer but…please, can I have dinner with him one last time?"

James felt an overwhelming rush of pity for his friend at sight of the desperation in his eyes and the pleading in his voice. He gave a small smile "Course you can, just remember…you know…"

Remus nodded sadly as he pulled his bag over his shoulder "Yea…I know."

Peter and James exchanged looks but didn't say anything as the three of them walked to dinner. Remus stared at his feet resentfully, trying to get his words together and trying not to back down.

"_I have to…I have to before it's too late…but I can't I…I love him, how do I tell him…_" he thought miserably.

"Hey guys! Oy! Over here!" a voice yelled, penetrating his thoughts and look up.

Sirius was down the hall waving. Remus stared at him for a moment before he suddenly felt the impulse to run to him and he did. In fact, Sirius almost fell back from the force when Remus hugged him.

He smiled "Whoa, easy there! You should warn me before you- Rem, you ok?"

Remus hugged him tighter and didn't look in his eye, as if trying to melt into him…he wished he could.

Sirius frowned and lifted his chin "Hey, you ok?"

Remus quickly forced a smile "Yea, course I am, I just…I didn't…um, get to thank you for helping me stop being such an idiot."

Sirius grinned and gave him a swift kiss "Maybe I should do that more often then. Come on, let's go eat."

Remus smiled and they waited for James and Peter to catch up and the four of them walked down to the Great Hall, where they sat at their usual spot at the end of the Gryffindor table.

"So, d'you have a good day then?" Remus asked, god he was gonna miss being able to ask.

Sirius grinned "Oh yeah! Snape's in my last class of the day, Charms, and…heh, well, let's just say that he found out how uncomfortable pin cushions feel!"

Remus smiled as he listened to Sirius go into more detail, only half way listening for the rest of his brain was to busy mourning over the fact that this would be the last time the could be this way, Sirius having an arm slung around him lazily and stealing a kiss or two as dinner went on.

His brain had once more turned on him and the internal agruement began.

"_Just think of the words ahead of time so you don't end up like last time._"

"_That never works, the words always vanish!_"

"_I wasn't talking about that, I was talking about taking advantage of a potion induced-_"

"_HEY! He started it! You make it sound like I trapped him into it, he knew what he was doing! What was I suppose to do?!_"

"_You were SUPPOSE to be a good person and tell him to back off!_"

"_That wasn't my fault! These stupid...instincts...I couldn't help it, ok?! I swear, it wasn't my fault!_"

"_Yea? Well don't let it happen again! Honestly, you're not fully wolf._"

"_It's...not...my...FAULT! I don't even know what happened there...something took over, I don't know! And...it's weird, just...weird. I can't describe what happened after then but...ugh, whatever! I'll figure it out later, right now, I have to think of an easy way of ending this...but how?_"

Frustrated with his own thoughts, he tried to push them out of his head as dinner went on.

Lily came around the middle of dinner with a few books in her arms "Sorry, I was in the library." She said to James, sitting next to him and placing her books down on the floor.

He smiled and kissed her cheek "S'all right. You'll have to make it up to me though."

Lily rolled her eyes but smiled as dinner went on as usual. In fact, it was great. They all laughed as they told each other different jokes and stories of the day and then went to the tower to retire.

As they went though, James stopped Remus outside the Fat Lady.

"Hey, you want me to get rid of everybody?" he asked seriously.

Remus smiled "Thanks but…I'll just wait until everyone's gone to bed. Besides, he asked me to help him with the essay from McGonagall so…"

James nodded and both went into the common room.

Sirius lounged back in a comfy couch by the fire, but Remus batted his head "No, no, get up! Come on, you asked for my help so lets get to it."

He groaned "Can't we do it tomorrow?"

"No, come on now, go sit at the table." He said, grabbing Sirius by the hand and pulling him to his feet.

Sirius grumbled and plopped down in his chair "You're luck you're so cute or I'd…"

Remus raised an eyebrow "You'd what?"

He turned to get his books out "Nothin', nothin'…"

"No, no, no I want know, what were you saying?"

"Ok, well she said for examples to look on page 578!" Sirius said, opening his book and not looking him in the eye.

Remus smirked "That's what I thought you said."

As the two worked the common room began to empty until, after about two hours, nearly everyone had said their 'goodnights' and gone off to bed.

Lily yawned and gave James a peak on the cheek "Well, I think I'll turn in to…night guys."

"G'night." came four replies.

James glanced at Remus who nodded then stood up and nudged Peter "Hey, we better head in to. Care for Magical Creatures is first class, don't want to be groggy for it."

Peter, who was nodding off in his armchair rubbed his eyes as he stood up "Alright…see you guys later then."

"Night Peter, James." Sirius muttered, not looking up from the essay.

Remus nodded "Goodnight…"

James shot him an encouraging smile before he and Peter headed up to their dorm.

Now the room was empty, besides the two.

Remus bit his lip and tightened his grip on his quill "_Ok…just, bring it up gradually…it has to be done and don't look in his eyes, they'll just make me melt…_" he thought anxiously.

No matter how many times he thought it however, the words didn't form right in his mouth. He'd open his mouth just to close it again and kept glancing sideways at him, wanting to say something but losing his nerve every time Sirius looked back.

Remus inwardly groaned "_Oh bother! Ok…I'll just, I'll do it tomorrow, besides, it wouldn't do well to work on an essay on bad terms…_" he thought, returning his eyes to the book and resumed writing.

However, just as he was finishing up a paragraph he stopped writing and shot Sirius a caveat look as he'd felt a hand on his knee, but Sirius didn't even look up as he continued writing.

Thinking maybe the hand would just stay still, Remus went back to work but the hand did not stay still and slowly crept up his thigh making Remus' hand quiver.

"_Oh god_…_not again!_"

He frowned "Sirius…" he said warningly but he seemed absorbed in his work as his right hand continued writing.

As if having a mind of its own however, his left hand continued up his leg gently. As the hand made its way the tingly sensation made it get a little tighter in Remus' lower regions. Sirius' hand went until it reached the clothed area of interest.

For the first time some emotion showed on Sirius' face. A small smile could be seen as he pushed his index finger against the bulge in Remus' pants.

"_Come on, stand strong! He's not thinking straight, a-and it's taking advantage of him! DON'T do anything! He's...god...he's good with his hands..._"

Remus closed his eyes as a small moan escaped his lips.

Sirius looked up, grinning ear-to-ear "D'you say somethin' Rem?"

Remus quickly opened his eyes and straightened up "Yes, I said keep your hands to yourself, this is work time."

Sirius laughed, "Who's not working? See, I'm almost done! You however…don't seem to be doing much."

And it was, in fact, true. They had to do an entire parchment on transfiguring nonliving objects into actual living things, such as tables into dogs and Sirius was nearly at the bottom of his parchment, Remus however, was still in the middle and the word he was in the middle of writing was very sloppy looking as his hand kept shaking.

Sirius shook his head in mock disapproval "Shame, shame…and here I thought you were the school-ish one."

Remus sighed, "Well maybe I'd get more work done if you'd stop seducing me."

Sirius grinned "Oh, you can't say you don't love it…" as he said this he pressed his fingers more roughly to him, earning a strangled sort of gasp from Remus which made his grin widened "Oooh, I like that noise." And put more pressure to hear the noise again.

"Sirius, it's due tomorrow-" he gasped.

"I don't care." He said seriously as he got out of his chair "I've already told you, you're more important to me then any school grade. I wouldn't trade you for all the N.E.W.Ts in the world."

Remus stared at him "Sirius…"

Sirius smiled and sat on his lap, straddling him as he leaned close "I love you Rem." As the space between them closed, Remus dropped his quill and wrapped his arms around Sirius.

"_Oh screw this!_"

The kiss was very earnest, perhaps too much for the chair they were both occupying as they fell to the ground, but it didn't matter, that just added to the growing excitement as Sirius was now fully on top of Remus, kissing him forcefully as his hands slipped in his robe.

Remus moaned as Sirius bucked his hips slightly, rubbing against his growing hard-on. The moment was so perfect, so right but then, it was completely tarnished by a gasp that was heard from a corner of the room.

Sirius stopped his actions and looked up "Oh, er…hello. Um, wh-what do you need at this hour, Professor Ronts?"

Remus gasped, "Ronts?!" pushed Sirius off him and stood up, straightening his robe and hair as best he could "Um, t-th-there's a very good explanation for this ma'am! I…er…"

Professor Ronts stood in the doorway looking quiet embarrassed, her face bright red and her eyes glued to the ground "Um, yes well…we all know the reason for it, which is actually why I came. Remus, can I speak to you for a moment?"

He nodded and followed her outside the common room.

Once the door was closed she was able to look at him "Did he jump you again, like the first time? Are you ok?"

Remus glanced down at his shoes "Er, yeah, I'm fine."

She smiled "Well you don't have to worry about any more of those. Remus, it's done. I just finished it! If you like, we could give it to him right now!"

His eyes widened in horror "What?! NO!"

Ronts blinked in confusion "No?"

"I mean- I mean, Nooo…not right now! See, um, it's the middle of the night and he'll want all sorts of explanations and such. Tomorrow we can tell him and he can ask all the questions he wants and it won't be effecting anyone's sleep." He said quickly.

Slowly she nodded "Well, that does make sense…alright, tomorrow then. Any particular time-"

"After dinner. You can get him right before curfew." Remus said before he could stop himself.

She nodded "Right…are you sure you want him in there after-"

"It's fine. I can handle it." He said before bidding her brisk goodnight and quick-walked into the common room again.

Sirius nearly jumped out of his chair "Oh good. So what'd she want? Rem? Hey! Remus!"

Remus didn't stop walking, he went right passed Sirius without so much as looking at him and up to the dorm, once in he kicked off his shoes and plopped down on his bed miserably, not even bothering to change.

The door creaked again meaning Sirius had followed him in.

"Remus what's wrong?" he whispered.

Remus didn't even look as he felt him lean over him "I'm tired. Goodnight."

"Tired? But-"

"Goodnight!" he repeated, not bothering to lower his voice.

Sirius stood in his spot for a moment and stared at him, Remus could feel his hurt and confused eyes digging into his back. Then there was the soft movement of feet and then the creak of his bed, which meant he went to his bed.

Inwardly Remus flinched, "_Ohhh, great. On top of everything else now I feel guilty!_" he thought.

He sighed and turned on his back…before turning on his side. But no matter what side he slept on the tangled mess of problems in his stomach wouldn't settle and sleep evaded him.

Also, judging by the lack of rhythmic breathing, it would seem he wasn't the only one laying awake in bed that night.

---

The next morning Remus reluctantly woke because the sun was shining right in his face.

"…Damn…" he muttered, knowing now that he was awake it'd be near impossible to go back to the blissful, trouble less sleep. It had taken about 4 more hours then usual just to get to sleep.

For a moment he lay back, the slowly forced himself into a sitting position and yawned widely.

"Well, I see someone's finally up!" a voice said cheerfully at his side.

Remus nearly jumped "Sirius! Oh, don't do that."

Sirius smiled "Sorry. So, how'd you sleep? Good I hope."

Remus blinked, why was he so happy? Considering how much of a jerk he was last night he figured Sirius would be at least upset if not totally snubbing him for it, but, he decided just to go with it "Um, ok, I guess…"

Sirius smiled "That's good. Well, better hurry up then for breakfast."

Remus stared at him for a moment, there was a sort of hollowness to his smile and his eyes seemed a bit dull, why was he pretending to be happy? Did that mean he just wanted to pretend last night didn't happen?

Remus shrugged "Ok then." and got out of bed.

The strange thing was, this fake mood went on all morning and what was really strange was that no one else could see it. They all just fell for it, but Remus could hear the forced easy-going in his voice and the fact that he was keeping some distance between them was definitely different.

Never the less, breakfast went on and no one was a wiser.

But as Sirius got up without even finishing his meal, saying he wanted to get to class early so he could finish up his unfinished essay, Remus got up and followed him.

Sirius smiled falsely when he saw he was being followed "Hey."

Remus nodded "Hey…why are you acting like that?"

He blinked "Like what?"

"Oh don't play dumb. You're not nearly as happy as you're letting on." Remus said knowingly.

Finally the fake smile fell and he looked at the ground with a sigh "…I knew I couldn't fool you but-"

"You don't have to try! You've got every right to be upset I mean, I was a total git last night and I'm sorry, I really am. Don't pretend; it's not nearly as good as the real thing. Why would you want to pretend anyway?"

Sirius shrugged "I…I just…I really care about you...but...ugh, you never tell me anything! I mean, it seems like every time something's wrong you talk to James! Or a teacher or someone but you never let me in! So, I thought…well, maybe you should get a taste of your own medicine!"

Remus made a face "I'm not like that."

Sirius rolled his eyes "Oh yes you are. You think I don't notice when you force a smile and just nod dully when I ask if you're ok? Why do you think I tell you I love you so much? It's true, that's why and I just thought if I said it enough you'd eventually break and tell me when something's wrong…that you wouldn't keep me out of your life…" as he finished saying this he looked away.

Remus was silent for a moment…had he really been hurting that much?

He just did that because he didn't want to burden Sirius with his problems and sometimes he was talking about the potion but still…Sirius looked really hurt and it tore him up.

Remus bit his lip, what he was about to say was gonna make it all the more harder when the inevitable break up came "Sirius…I…I really don't know what to say…I just, I never knew that's how you felt…I'm sorry. I really care about you but…I just didn't want you to take on my problems…"

Sirius smiled sadly "Well, they say that being a couple is being able to share each other's burdens…you're willing to take burdens...but you never want to share them."

Silence passed between them for a moment before the sound of students entering the hall reminded them they were in school.

Sirius smiled and gave him a soft kiss on the cheek "I'll see you at lunch, kay?"

Remus nodded "Right."

As he walked away he inwardly groaned "_Great…__**now**__ how am I gonna break up with him, knowing all that?_"

---

The rest of the day went on with Remus absentmindedly going through everything in class.

Peter stared as Remus tried to trim their Wild Teruvian fern with a hand shovel "Remus are you ok?"

"Hm? Oh yeah…never been better…" he muttered.

"Oh…so then…you normal cut plants with shovels?" he asked cautiously.

He looked up "Wha? Oh! Ah…heh, sorry…here, why don't you do it…?"

His mind was too busy thinking up the best words to say to care about the Teruvian plant…he had to, if Sirius went back to normal while they were still going out it could be a hazardous mess to deal with.

But as lunch came around his nerve left and he hid out in the library with a heavy book.

"_Dammit! Will you stop being such a coward and just say it already!?!_" he thought angrily at himself.

After lunch he had to duck out as best he could to avoid Sirius.

Finally, there was no more hiding as Potions came around.

Professor Ronts came by his table and whispered "So then, you want to bring him here after dinner?"

Remus blinked in confusion but one look at her face and then at a bubbling cauldron and his wits came about him "Not in here, stupid students might try coming by to **EAVESDROP!!!**" he nearly yelled the last part.

He yelled because the entire class had stopped working and were leaning in close, straining to hear what the whispering was about but the minute he yelled that everyone snapped at attention and went right back to work.

Ronts rubbed her ear and Remus smiled sheepishly "Sorry."

She nodded and as the noise picked up again she went on "No, no, it's alright I understand…so then, you want I should take it up to Gryffindor tower?"

He shook his head "No, how about the hospital wing? People aren't allowed in there unless they're sick and knowing Madam Pomfrey, she can tell who's sick and who isn't."

She nodded "Ok. You get him up to the hospital wing and I'll give him the potion."

Remus nodded but as soon as she was gone he banged his head on the desk "Damn…"

Peter and James exchanged looks but thought it better not to ask and went back to work on their potions. The three friends walked in silence when class let out and as they were going to the Great Hall.

Sirius was waiting outside the doors, leaning against the far ended one jumped up as he saw them coming "There you are! Remus what happened at lunch I-"

"Sirius I need to talk to you." He said suddenly.

The urgency in his voice made Sirius stop, a look of concern replacing anger "Why? Are you ok?"

"Just…come on…" he said sadly, walking to the entrance hall.

Sirius looked at James and Peter who shrugged before following wordlessly behind Remus.

Remus forgot all the words he'd gathered for this moment, his mind was completely blank as he opened the front door and the cool evening air hit his face.

"_See, I told you thinking it out ahead of time doesn't work!_"

With Sirius at his feet he walked to the tree that was sort of close to the lake that they always sat under and once there, he plopped down and stared at the setting sun, away from Sirius.

Sirius stared at him for a moment, not sure how to approach him "…I…hm…it's…it's a beautiful sunset isn't it?"

Remus nodded but still didn't look at him.

A tense silence passed before Remus sighed and turned to face him "Sirius, you ever have a time when…you really, really love someone but…it's not right…the way you are together and…you have to…"

Remus bit his lip as he saw a fearful look come to his face and before he knew what he was doing he leaned forward and pressed his lips to his. Sirius kissed back but with pleading, begging him not to say what he knew would come next.

But he had to.

Reluctantly, Remus broke the kiss and looked him square in the eye "Sirius, please…remember this, no matter what…I love you I really mean it, I've never loved anyone like I do you. I never thought I'd meet anyone I love this much…you mean so much to me, I don't want to lose you so…ugh, I…god, I love you…but-"

Sirius quickly cut across "I love you to so don't-"

Remus shook his head "No…you don't. Not like I wish you did…"

Sirius gave him a look mixed with anger and confusion "Remus what the hell are you talking about?!"

"Can you just remember it, please? Just remember, no matter what happens after tonight, no matter what I say next…I love you…that's why I have to…it's not fair to you, you should make your own choices…I…can't keep taking advantage of you, it's not right!"

Sirius shook his head "What?! Remus, you're not making any sense!"

He sighed and gripped Sirius' hand tightly "I…I'm sorry…but I don't think we should see each other any more…"

Sirius' eyes widened and for a moment a furious look came to his eyes as well as confusion but both were canceled out when he looked up to see Remus looking away, struggling (and failing) to hide his tears.

God, he hated this! He didn't even want to do this! It felt as if everyone was against him, forcing him to do something he didn't even want to do…but, he had to let him go…because he wasn't there by his own choice.

Sympathy clouded Sirius' eyes as he gently reached out a hand and cupped his face "Remus…"

Remus looked up and again, it was practically out of his control as he leaned forward and kissed him ardently, a kiss, which Sirius returned and it seemed to end all too soon.

Remus pulled away, his eyes much brighter then usual "I'm sorry." and ran back to the castle.

Sirius jumped up to his feet "Remus, wait!"

He ran after him, all the way to the castle, but never quiet catching up…he took a left then went up a stair flight…

"_Looks like he's going to the hospital wing…_" he thought but followed all the same.

Turns out he was right; Remus went right through to the hospital wing and closed the door behind him.

Sirius sprinted up and yanked the door open "Remus!"

To his surprise it was not Remus who was there, but Professor Ronts, Madam Pomfrey, James, Lily and Peter.

"…Wh-what's going on? Where's Remus?" he asked slowly.

None of them answered that, instead, Professor Ronts smiled gently and moved forward "You look a bit tired, how's about you sit down and I'll give you something to drink."

He frowned "Not till I know where Remus is, I have to talk to him.

Madam Pomfrey glanced around "Er, he left for a moment, I have a secret passage into that leads to the main hall. Now, you really should listen to Professor Ronts dear, you look a bit insipid."

He looked at James "He's wearing the cloak isn't he?"

James sighed, "Sirius, just listen to the teachers!"

"Not until I talk to Remus, it's important!" he said stubbornly.

Professor Ronts sighed "Ok…I really didn't want to have to do this but…Petrificus Totalus!"

Sirius went rigid and fell to the floor.

"Wingardium Leviosa." and floated Sirius to the nearest bed.

Had he been able to move his face he'd be glaring at Ronts, but she seemed to be able to tell all the same "I'm sorry Mr. Black, but you left me no choice. Now…I'm going to take the bind off you, but if you attempt to run I'm going to have to bind you up and force it down you're throat…do you understand?"

Sirius was completely confused, what the hell was she talking about?! Put what down his throat? Why were they all here, where was Remus?! All these thoughts muddled together as he looked back at her.

Ronts stared at him as if trying to see in his mind and, realizing that was exactly what she was trying to do he thought 'yes'. And next thing he knew the bind was off.

For a moment he lay still and she smiled "Good. Now, let me just get some in a glass. It's very important that you drink all that I give you, ok?"

Sirius didn't say anything, but as soon as she turned her back he nearly sprang up from the bed, but Madam Pomfrey was quick to push him back "No, no, no! Stay back!"

"Grr, LEGO! I said get you're hands off me! Get off!" he yelled, struggling as James and Peter went to her aid and tried to force him down.

"Sirius stop! It's for your own good!" James said, nearly getting kicked in the face.

But Sirius continued his desperate struggle "NO! Get off! GET OFF! What are you doing?! Lego! I have to talk to Remus…LET GO!!!"

"Sirius!"

At the voice he stopped struggling and attempted to look up. There at the end of his bed the air seemed to move a bit and Remus appeared, taking off the invisibility cloak.

His face was solemn and grave, his premature wrinkles showing more clearly then usual and his eyes seemed a bit puffy as though he'd done a brief bit of tearing but were just as serious as the rest of him.

"Remus…"

"Sirius, trust them, this is for you…once you take this potion everything'll make sense and you won't be in the dark anymore…" he said in a surprisingly soft tone.

Sirius stared at him "…Only if you promise I can talk to you after this…you promise?"

He nodded "I promise you, once you've had the potion we can talk all you like."

"And you won't run off again?" he asked.

Remus sighed "I promise you on all the chocolates in Honeydukes that I won't run."

Sirius nodded; a sign that he'd hold him to it and relaxed as the grips on his arms and legs loosened then were gone.

Ronts smiled slightly as she came forward with a bubbling goblet "Ok…now, drink all of this and then this one, ok?"

Sirius nodded and took the cup from her.

As he downed the strange liquid that tasted somewhat like orange juice mixed with pineapple juice, stink-weed and toothpaste. He made a face as he swallowed it all and once it was gone a weird feeling over came him. It was a sort of light feeling, like he would float away at any second.

His vision went a bit blurry as Ronts gave him a second goblet and the feeling of weightlessness increase and was now mixed with a strange almost musical ringing in his head.

He felt himself sway slightly as his vision rapidly left. He glanced at Remus once more, only to see a tear rolling down his cheek. Instinctively he reached out to clear it but it seemed the movement made him loss balance and he barely felt himself fall back on the pillow before it got dark and he knew nothing after that.

---

"…Is he ok?" a voice boomed.

"Oh yes. It's supposed to do that. See, I had to take into account just how much he got doused with so I could give him the proper amount. You see, the love potion affects the mind. It's sort of like an illusion set in your head and in order to remove it the antidote will normally knock one out. It's easier to wipe a mind that isn't doing much, relaxing. And the human mind is most relaxed when we're asleep." An even louder voice explained.

"Calm down Professor, this isn't a class you're teaching." A voice whispered, surprisingly enough.

The voice before it grew louder "Oh I know but…it's just so fascinating! Especially this potion, I can't help but…well, anyways, he should be regaining consciousness about now then we can explain everything. Now, let me do all the talking. Remember, he doesn't remember anything about the love potion so it's best I explain this to him…"

Those were the first things Sirius heard.

He struggled to think "_Potion? What potion? Where am I?_"

The sooner he got up the sooner he'd find out, but the moment he tried to open his eyes the light was to bright he just squeezed them tighter together and groaned in slight pain.

"Oh, there he goes." Ronts said.

"Candle to close to you dear?" he heard Madam Pomfrey ask.

"_Candle light? How can it be so bright?_" he thought.

"You're senses are going to be a bit tender right now, one of the side-effects, but don't worry, it'll all pass in a moment or two." He heard Ronts say in a much calmer and softer voice.

"_Ah, that'd explain why everyone was yelling earlier…_" he thought.

Once more he groaned only this time he successfully opened his eyes and forced himself into a sitting position. All around him were Ronts, Pomfrey, James, Lily and Peter, all smiling as if he'd just had a brush with death and survived.

He blinked in confusion and looked over Peter's head.

In a chair at the far end of the room sat Remus.

Their eyes locked and Sirius felt an involuntary shiver, Remus had an unreadable expression on his face as he stared back at him but he had the strangest feeling he was feeling too much to express.

Surprisingly though, a slight smile came to Remus face and he close his eyes, breaking the connection.

"…What's going on?" Sirius asked slowly, still looking at Remus.

---

End A/N: Ohhh! I think that went rather nicely! This chapter had been plaguing me for sometime if you hadn't noticed. Remus was actually supposed to break up with him in chapter 16 but I just didn't know how to make it make sense with…well, anyways, hope you liked it, review please!


	19. Chapter 19

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! GAH! Sorry I took so long! I majorly over-slept so I couldn't update this mornin'! I dunno about where you all are but right now it's like 5:40 PM. Sorries! So, without further ado, I present chapter 19!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.

**Chapter 19**

Professor Ronts smiled kindly "Well, this may come as a bit of a shock but do you remember what happened about a month ago? It was Valentines Day and we were working on a potion…"

Sirius blinked and tried to think "Potion…potion…?"

"It's alright, take your time. It'll be hard to remember at first. The potion is very, _very_ strong…it'll come to you though. Just try. Try thinking of it, ok? But not to hard."

"Yea, yea, I heard you the first time…ok…potion…" he muttered, closing his eyes in hopes it'd help.

It didn't.

He sighed and opened them again, his gaze landing on Remus. Almost the instant he did that single moment all came back to him. He was sitting in class, leaning back in his chair boredly when a heavy cauldron fell over his head and the rest…well, he remembered that just a bit to well.

At remembrance of it he nearly jumped out of the bed "AHHH! Love potion! All over my head! And, and-"

"Shhh, Sirius calm down! It's ok! Now, I've just given you the antidote for it so you'll be fine now." Ronts said soothingly.

He stared at her blankly "An antidote? Just now? Well, how long was I out for?" he figured he should say 'out' because to him, it was one big black spot in his memory, as if he'd been unconscious.

She sighed "Well...about a month or so-"

"A MONTH?!"

"Yes, yes, but that's not important right now. Try to think, do you remember anything else?"

He closed his eyes as he strained to think, "Uhh…w-well…not really…no. I just…I don't know why I remembered that…it was like…like…"

"Like just a flash of recollection but nothing more then that." Ronts more stated then asked.

Sirius nodded "YEAH! And- and everything else…no matter how hard I think I…I just…"

"Get a huge blackness, as if it never happened."

He blinked "Uh, yeah…"

She nodded with a smile "Yes that sounds about right. You see, the potion effect everyone differently, as does the antidote. It can sometimes take YEARS for people to remember everything, or, it could take just a few minutes. It really has a lot to do with body type, how much of the emotion was real and-"

"Prof. Ronts, we're not in class." James reminded cheekily.

She frowned slight at being cut off but quickly smiled as she looked back at Sirius "Well, in any case you should have complete control of yourself now but if you feel any head pains or stomach pains you be sure to tell me because it may be an allergic reaction to the antidote. Your memory should return slowly over time so don't be to worried about it. Ok?"

He slowly nodded "Um, ok…"

She grinned "Good! Well, now that this is all taken care of I'm off to bed. I'll see you all in my class and I can assure you there will be NO love potions for the rest of the year!" she nodded to them all and left.

Madam Pomfrey rolled her eyes "She's be fretting about this for a while now, it must be a big weight off her shoulders. So, Mr. Black, do you feel well enough to go back to Gryffindor tower or would you like to stay here?"

Sirius' gaze shot over once more Remus and just short moments of their time together came to his mind.

Almost immediately his cheeks went a pink "I, uh…I'd like to stay in here for tonight if that's ok…" he mumbled embarrassedly as he messed with the ends of his blanket.

Madam Pomfrey nodded "Right then, you lot say good night and then it's off to bed with all of you."

James smiled and punched him playfully in the arm "Night Pads, see ya tomorrow."

He nodded (though not quite understanding the nickname) as they all said goodnight…well, almost all. As soon as Madam Pomfrey said to say their goodnights, Remus had gotten up from his seat and walked swiftly out the door, not glancing back at all.

Sirius bit his lip as a twinge of guilt rose "_Maybe I shouldn't have seemed so repulsed…I think I hurt his feelings…_" he thought.

He shook his head; now there was a stupid thought.

Remus knew he was under the influence of a potion he shouldn't have gotten so deeply involved, he told himself reasonably as he turned over to sleep.

"_I mean, Remus isn't stupid. He knew! He…he didn't think it was serious…did he?_" he thought.

He sighed and put his hands behind his head "Wow…what a mess…"

Madam Pomfrey turned out the lights, though he kept his eyes open and stared at the dark ceiling, trying to remember what exactly happened, but his memories were about as dark as the room.

---

Lily, Peter and James all walked a safe distance behind Remus. It was so hard to tell what he was feeling, none of them wanted to say the wrong thing and make him explode or something.

But they couldn't just leave him! He seemed so hurt and…alone…

Finally, Lily gathered up her courage and walked a bit closer to him "Um…R-Remus? You ok?" she asked timidly.

To their surprise Remus turned to face her with a calm sort of look "Yes Lily, I'm fine…"

Though he spoke with a level voice and didn't seem to upset by it, there was sadness in his eyes that could be seen from miles away.

Still, Lily didn't want to over-step her boundaries and simply nodded with a smile "Oh." and backed off.

Remus was glad she did.

The only reason he had a calm demeanor outside was because he didn't know how he felt inside, there were to many emotions all whirling together, he couldn't tell what was what.

He was somewhat glad that Sirius had his free-will restored, but sad because that meant it was over between them and angry because it had to come to this, and even angrier still that he'd let himself fall into this trap, the one that was set from the beginning and fearful of how their friendship would hold once Sirius had fully gotten his memory back.

Yet even though all these feelings muttled together one thing was certain, his heart ached terribly and all he wanted to do at this moment was go to the room and collapse into sleep.

The rest of the way to the Gryffindor tower was silent and Remus was surprised at how soft his voice was when he told the Fat Lady the password and the 4 of them slipped back in.

He told them all goodnight and went upstairs but almost as soon as he laid down into his nice comfy bed the tiredness in his eyes left and he felt wide awake, unable to so much as close his eyes.

He groaned and pulled his pillow over his face "Why are you torturing me like this?!"

Who he was talking to even he didn't know as he tossed about, trying to make himself tired enough to sleep, but his eyes stayed open. As he stared at the dark room, Sirius' empty bed caught his eye.

For a moment he stared at it…and he stared…and stared…without even thinking he got to his feet and walked over to the empty bed. Even stranger still, he pulled back the covers and got into Sirius' bed.

He laid his face to the pillow and breathed deeply, taking in Sirius' scent that was still on the pillow. The scent was so calming, so...happy. He buried his face in the pillow, softly weeping.

Why was he crying now, of all times?

It was confusing, but after a while the tired returned to his eyes and he felt them get heavier…one great yawn escaped his mouth and he felt his eyes close again "_Maybe…tomorrow I'll wake up and this'll all be a dream…please, let this be just a really bad dream…_" he thought hopefully.

---

The sun shone in through the window.

Remus groaned and pulled his blanket over his eyes.

"Why's he in Sirius' bed?" a timid voice whispered.

"Like I know! He probably just wanted to be close to him or whatever, something like that." a deeper voice muttered.

"…Should we wake him?"

"Yeah, it wouldn't do for him to miss breakfast…Remus…Rem, wake up." He heard James say and felt a hand shaking him.

Remus grumbled something before pulling the blanket back and sitting up, his back to his friends. He felt ashamed; he hadn't cried himself to sleep in years and last night he sobbed like a baby, how pathetic…

James smiled encouragingly "Come on Rem, you don't want Pete to eat all the good things do you?"

Remus sighed and got up "Whatever…"

James and Peter exchanged looks but didn't say anything as the three of them got their shower stuff then headed off to the restrooms and after a quick shower, headed downstairs to breakfast.

Lily was sitting at the end of the breakfast table when they arrived "Hey guys."

Peter smiled "Mornin'."

James grinned and kissed her cheek "Mornin' Lily."

Remus nodded in acknowledgement before sitting next to Peter and grabbing a piece of toast.

Lily glanced at James before whispering, "How is he doing?"

"I can't say for sure, he's not really acting as angry as I thought he would." He whispered back.

Lily gave him a look "Well, he's not exactly an angry person."

James rolled his eyes "If you've seen him all week then you'd think so."

"I'm sorry to interrupt but HE can hear everything your saying, thank you very much!" Remus unexpectedly snapped.

Both James and Lily looked down in embarrassment.

"Sorry but, we're just really worried for you Remus." Lily said softly.

He glared at her "Well don't be, I'm not."

The coldness in his voice just came from nowhere and was enough to bring silence over the rest of them as they ate breakfast…that was until the Great Hall door opened again.

"Oh Sirius, are you sure you're ok?"

"Did the antidote taste funny?"

"Were you allergic?"

"Do you remember anything?"

"How's your head?"

"Do you need someone to carry your bag?"

Sirius was in the middle of a flock of girls looking completely annoyed.

He sighed, "For the FINAL time, I feel fine, thanks for asking. No, I don't need anyone to hold my stuff, I can't remember what happened and as far as I know, I'm not **dead** so I figure I'm **not** allergic to the antidote."

Despite himself, Remus chuckled.

Not loudly but loud enough for Peter, James and Lily to look at him in surprise.

Sirius managed to shake off his fangirls and came to sit at the end of the table, next to James, as he always had before. "Yeesh! The cornered me in the hallway and tried grabbing my books from me!" he exclaimed, clapping James on the back.

Lily rolled her eyes playfully "Oh sure they did."

Sirius jumped up in surprise "AH! Now that's something I forgot. Lily's no longer avoiding James and scorning his very existence!"

James grinned and put an arm around her "See, I told you she couldn't resist me forever!"

Sirius smirked "Well, it's hard to ignore that annoying fly that's always buzzing in your ear, eh Lily?"

She smiled "Yea, especially when the fly makes a big deal out of Valentines Day and nearly embarrasses you into next week!"

James shrugged "What can I say, I'm dramatic!"

Sirius grinned and nudged him in the side "Yea? So then tell me, you get all the way yet?"

James nearly choked on his juice and Lily punched him hard in the arm, her face a bright red and said "Sirius!"

This display was also enough to get a laugh from Remus as well as Peter.

"(Ahem!) Yes well…so, they keepin' your classes the way they are?" James asked, trying to change the subject.

Sirius sighed "Yea, said it'd 'help me concentrate more' or something…"

"Well then, you know what you have to do." James said slowly.

Sirius grinned "Fail every class until the next break so they'll change my class back of course!"

James laughed as they high-fived "Exactly!"

Remus rolled his eyes "Oh yes, I'm sure that'll work."

Sirius turned to him with a grin "You're just jealous 'cuz you didn't think of it first!"

The rest of the morning was surprisingly…happy! Sirius seemed completely back to normal and (though it was probably due to the fact that he still couldn't remember hardly anything) he treated Remus just the same as everyone else, even more surprising was Remus, who smiled and laughed with the rest of them, his sour mood completely gone as though it were never there at all!

However, once the group parted for their classes, it was as if breakfast didn't happen.

McGonagall cleared her throat to show the class had started.

"Right. Now, I assume you all finished your essays, they are due today." And at that she gave a flick of her wand and all their parchments flew into a neat pile on her desk. "Very good. So today, we continue our discussion from yesterday. If you'll all take out your quills and parchment for notes…"

Everyone pulled their supplies out…well, almost.

Remus sighed and put his head down on the desk miserably.

James glanced over in surprise "Pst, Rem. What're you doin'? Get your stuff out, McGonagall's comin' and-"

He quickly shut up as McGonagall came to their desk.

Her eyes narrowed "Lupin, I believe I just told you to get your things out."

For a moment he didn't move, as though he didn't hear her.

Just as she was about to repeat herself however, he tiredly did as told before returning his head to the table.

She frowned but decided not to press the subject "Alright. Well, I'd strongly suggest you all pay attention and take notes because **this will be on your N.E.W.Ts**." she emphasized, but Remus still didn't lift his head.

Part of him wanted to care, but...now he just felt...empty, N.E.W.Ts didn't matter as much as they had before...Sirius' words came back to his head as he thought of grades. "_You're more important to me then any school grade. I wouldn't trade you for all the N.E.W.Ts in the world._"

He sighed under his breath "Neither would I..."

Peter looked ready to say something to him but James put a hand on his shoulder and shook his head.

"Just leave him alone for now. He's really hurting." he murmured.

Peter nodded and they both turned to write out their notes.

James was right in saying he was really hurting, but the thing was even as time went on, he ALWAYS seemed to be hurting. This depressive, moping behavior went on for a good 4 weeks and the only times he seemed to smile was when Sirius was around. It was almost as if he'd gone back to normal at those times, but every time Sirius left the depression returned with twice as much vigor as before.

What's more, he seemed to be getting thinner and paler, as if it were the full moon and there wasn't really any explaination for it that they could think of right at the top of their heads.

It was starting to become too much.

---

James, Peter and Lily sat in the common room discussing it.

"It's like he's not even there any more! Half the time he's got this glazed look in his eyes as if he's in his own little la-la world or something!" James said with an exasperated sigh.

Peter nodded "Yea, and when he's not like that, he's so moody! He's not even like himself any more!"

James frowned "We gotta do somethin', this is just gettin' pathetic. So, any ideas?"

Lily sighed "He doesn't want to talk about it and nothing's making him feel better. I offered him some HoneyDukes chocolate the other day but it just made him feel worse."

"And of course Sirius is as clueless as ever. He doesn't even know what's going on."

"Come on guys. Let's all just think. We'll come up with something!"

---Sometime later---

James sat upside-down (his head was on the floor I mean) in a couch and threw a wrinkled up wad of paper up and caught it.

"Anything guys?" he asked.

Peter groaned "I don't know! I've never had to cheer up someone as depressed as he is before!"

Lily had a hand thoughtfully on her face "Hmmm…well, what if we…no. I mean, maybe we could try…no wait…ugh. I don't know, I can't think of anything!"

James sighed and continued messing with the paper-ball "WELL, guess that's it then."

"Yeah. It's not like we can set him up with someone else to get his mind off Sirius or anything." Peter muttered.

Both James and Lily sat up at that.

"WOW! Pete, you're a genius!" James exclaimed.

Lily giggled "You did it again! It's perfect! Oh, I can talk to some of my friends; we can set him up on a blind date!"

James grinned "And I can talk some sense into him in the meantime so he's not to surprised when he finds out."

"Yes! Let's get going on it!"

And they both jumped up and ran out of the room, leaving Peter alone once more.

Peter blinked "Huh?"

---

Remus sighed as he threw a rock into the lake. It was a free hour once more and he thought it fitting to sit in his once favorite spot outside. It was where he'd broken up with Sirius and for some reason he seemed to be coming there a lot.

"Damn…I feel like crap…" he muttered to the wind.

The rest of the people outside gave him his space as they went about their own business, laughing and having fun. It was a bright sunny day and only that one part of the lake seemed to be covered by a cloud of misery.

"_Well…you did the right thing. Now he can do whatever he wants and you're not taking advantage of him and you're still friends and…and that's really all that matters, right?_" a small positive voice said bracingly.

"Yeah…and the fact that I'm slowly killing myself doesn't mean anything." He answered it sullenly.

As much as he hurt to be around Sirius, he just couldn't help it. It hurt to be with him but it hurt more to be away from him and it hurt the most after being with him, it was a lose/lose situation.

"Heh…it's ironic really…he was so desperate to talk to me yesterday…now he's scared to be alone with me…" he said with a chuckle. It was a hollow laugh that held no humor.

And it was true to. If ever given the chance to be alone, Sirius would either suddenly have somewhere he'd need to be or ask someone else to join them. The fact that he was so frightened seemed worse then if Sirius were hating him. Yet even still, part of him was curious to what Sirius would have said; if they hadn't given him the antidote…

"Probably something like 'what did I do, tell me I can fix it' or 'lets talk about this first'…" he said with a scoff but went on "Or-or 'aren't you even going to tell me why?' or 'Please don't leave me, we can work this out'. One of those stupid over-used lines! Or, or like 'I love y-'…" he bit his lip and covered his face. Just talking about it was practically self-torture.

He sighed "…Dammit…"

Hm, he seemed to be cursing a lot more lately and making himself depressed.

"It's this stupid love. I hate it! Yeah, he still talks to me, but he's avoiding me when we're alone! He…he's scared or…or he hates me…god, I just…I wish I'd never dropped that stupid potion…" he murmured, looked wistfully at the water.

What's worse though, was the fact that no matter what he did, whether he wanted to know or not, he could tell if Sirius was near. It was weird. As a werewolf yeah he had greater senses (hear, smell, sight, etc) but for some reason, Sirius scent had gotten much strong, he could smell him no matter where he was.

"What the hell does that mean?" he muttered to his reflection in the water, though it gave no answer.

He sighed and silence fell between him and himself.

The silence was broken however, when a panting James came up to him "There you are! Oh, I've been lookin' all over for you!"

"Really? Oh, what a coincidence, I was just leaving."

James frowned and sat next to him "Ouch, harsh. Look. I know recently you've just wanted to be alone but I think I've got a way to put you out of your misery."

"Really? You've got a gun that shoots silver bullets? I've been trying to find one but-"

His frown deepened "Would you stop it for just a second and hear me out! We all know you're really hung up over Sirius, but you can't keep doing this to yourself, it'll kill ya. So…we, being your closest friends, want to help you get over him."

Remus didn't even look up from his sorrowful reflection "And by WE I'm sure you mean you, Lily and Peter."

"Yes. Pete's a real genius underneath that quiet-guy disguise. Lily's gonna talk to some of her friends, we'll set you up on a date or two and-"

Remus scoffed "Yeah right! What girl in the right mind wants ANYTHING to do with me after that whole 'Sirius-controlling' thing? All of them thought I did it on purpose! No girl will even give me the time of day!"

And even if they weren't like that, he wasn't interested in any of them. He couldn't really explain it, but for some reason, no one really seemed attractive any more and they all smelt…weird…not like Sirius, who smelt absolutely wonderful and was far more appealing to the eye.

But James went on, not hearing his thoughts "Not anymore! Remember? Sirius talked to 'em all, no one thinks that anymore."

Remus frowned "Well even still! I don't want anything to do with them! I'm fully content sulking about and being miserable the rest of my life. I've accepted the fact that love has passed me by and that I'm destined to die alone with nothing but sorrow."

James stared at him for a loooong time.

"…Wow, we _really_ need to do this now."

Remus clenched his fists angrily "James, will you listen to yourself?! You know what I am! You, Peter, the staff here and him! What girl will love me when they find out what I am?! I can't hide it! It's not like she'll fall for the sad excuses I use to tell you guys! NO ONE can love me once they know…"

"…_No one, but him and he was under the influence of a potion…_" he thought sadly, covering his face with his hands.

James frowned "What was that? 'Him'? You can't even say his name?! Remus, for gods sake, there are other people out there!"

"James you don't understand, **I** don't understand it! But...something happened! I dunno, whether there are other people out there or not I...I'm not interested. I can't really explain why but...something's holding me back..."

"I'll tell you what it is, it's called heart-ache. But, everyone gets over it and you will to!"

Remus shook his head "No, I don't think it's that simple...it's something else...but what?" he murmured, more to himself then to James.

But James didn't seem to be listening either way. He sighed and put a hand on Remus shoulder "Come on Moony, you gotta at least give it a shot. What have you to lose?"

"The very little self-respect I have left…"

James rolled his eyes "Oh come off it, just give it a try! Do you honestly think that being alone is best?"

"YES! Yes I do! I'd rather be alone then with anyone but him!" he exclaimed.

It was quiet for a moment.

James sighed "Remus…I, wasn't gonna tell you this but...remember the day after Sirius got the antidote and you slept in? Well, I'd woken up early and went to see him in the hospital wing. I told him everything he remember was show, a thing only so he wouldn't kill himself. Yeah, I told him about that and he does remember it, sort of. He says it's somewhat fuzzy, but he does remember some of the times he was with you...anyways, I told him that so he wouldn't feel awkward around you. Cuz, you know, in all honesty he told me he was kinda nervous to be around you, but when I told him that, he was fine with it. I did that so you can stay friends! Now all you've got to do is let it go and everything can go back to normal!"

"But it's not the truth James. I…to me, it wasn't just a show and it's not so easy to let it go..." He muttered to his feet.

James groaned "That's why we need to do this! So you can get over it! Rem, Sirius doesn't understand; you can't expect him to either! He thinks it was all just an act so you can't be hung up over him…come on, it's better then sitting here all alone isn't it?"

Remus scoffed "Personally, I think sitting alone IS best but…you probably won't shut up until I give it a try so…"

James grinned "Great! Come on, Lily's got the girl thing under control, what we've got to do is get you fixed up for it!"

Remus groaned and covered his eyes "Why am I suddenly regretting talking to you?"

James' grin widened as he pushed him to the castle "Don't worry; you'll be thanking me later!"

---

"James, I change my mind, lets just forget this." Remus said as he stared at himself in the mirror.

"What?! We can't do that! Lily said the girl she got really has her hopes set on this! You don't wanna disappoint her do you?"

"No! So that's why I should just forget it! Look, you might be fine with sneaking into Hogsmede after curfew but I'm not! Plus, your tux is a bit too small for me and I feel like I'm suffocating. Can we just forget this, please?"

In their room, James and Peter stood off to both his sides and examined him.

"I dunno, I think you look ok." Peter said offhandedly.

James titled his head "That hair of yours is a mess though."

Remus turned and frowned "Like you're one to talk about hair! What's wrong with mine?"

"It's all bushy! Where's that comb, we might have to get it wet or something to keep your hair down."

"And a bit of that uh, whatcha call it…er…cologne stuff to! Girls like that right?"

Remus groaned "Enough of this guys! I'm not going on this date and that's final!"

"Dost my ears deceptive me or is our fair Remus got himself a date?"

All three whirled around to see Sirius standing in the doorway with a huge grin.

Instinctively Remus covered his face "Um, er…"

Sirius didn't seem to hear his stuttering and clapped him hard on the back with a laugh "Who would've guessed? Our innocent Remy all grown up and breaking rules to be with a girl, that's great mate! So then, who's the lucky girl?"

"Um, I…er…don't know yet. It's sorta…um…a blind date…" he murmured into his hand.

He laughed "Even better! Oh no, don't tell me you're chickening out! What'sa matter, 'fraid of girls?"

Remus looked up angrily "I am not!"

"Well then, what's all that about not goin' then?"

"I didn't mean that, I…oh…never mind. I'm going, I…I was just complaining about this stupid suit." He sighed. He didn't want to look stupid in front of Sirius, and backing out would be one of the stupidest things he could do at the moment.

James smirked "_Excellent timing Sirius!_" then said aloud "Ok then! So, where's that comb?"

"I can conjure up some cologne if you want!"

"Nah Pete, last time you tried you almost blew up the room!"

"Well it's Remus' choice, so whaddya say?"

Remus rolled his eyes "No, thank you. Honestly I don't see what the big deal's about."

"Yeah, I agree."

Everyone looked at Sirius.

He blinked "What? Come on guys! Look at him! He looks all out of place in that outfit! Listen Rem, if you wanna really have a good time, just be yourself. No cologne, no hair junk, no tux, just you. If you do that, I'm sure she'll love ya." As he said this he put a hand on his shoulder.

Remus looked at him for the first time "You really think so?"

"Definitely! Would I lie about this?" he said with his usual smile.

Remus chuckled and shook his head "Probably. But still, I'll take your word for it."

He grinned "There ya go! I've been on my far share of dates, I know these things."

It was quiet after that…Sirius still hadn't moved his hand.

James and Peter exchanged looked of confusion at the two of them.

Suddenly Sirius cleared his throat and moved away "Yeah well, I just…I came in for my bag. Got a lota stuff to do. Good luck on the date Rem!" and after pulling his bag on his shoulder he walked out of the room, closing the door behind him.

Remus stared at the door for a moment. Once again, the happiness he always felt when Sirius was around went right out the door with him, leaving a cold lash of sorrow in its place.

He sighed and went to get a change of cloths.

Peter and James were silent through all this…and Remus was grateful they were.

---

Lily smirked as the three finally came downstairs "There you guys are! We were starting to wonder if you got lost on the way down or something!"

James grinned "Ah, ha…good one Lils, no, actually, someone just wanted to look good for this date!"

Remus rolled his eyes; he was now wearing a long sleeved shirt with a sweater over it and jeans that were just a little baggy "No. We took so long because some people insisted on making me a dress-up doll."

"Action figure! We're guys, remember?" Peter said.

Lily laughed "Well, whatever you are, I'd like you to meet a good friend of mine, Daisy."

Next to her stood a fairly pretty girl with bright blond hair and shocking blue eyes. She had on a casual shirt and some jeans and smiled as they approached.

"Whoa, what luck! You gotta good one." Peter muttered.

Remus nudged him slightly then looked back to Daisy with a smile "Er, hello. I'm-"

"Yeah, I know who you are. So, what're we gonna do?" she asked, in a surprisingly fast and high-pitched sort of voice.

Remus blinked "Um, w-well…um…"

"He knows a secrete passage into Honeydukes cellar, in Hogsmede!" James said quickly.

Daisy squealed "Really?! How fun! Let's go!" and grabbed him by the arm as she headed to the door.

He glanced back at them "Er, well, bye then."

In the common room was only them and one other. Sirius sat at a desk, working on something. He glanced up as they passed and gave Remus an encouraging smile.

Remus managed to smile back before Daisy pulled him through the portrait hole and they were off.

---

This was the worst date ever, and he'd only been a few in his life!

All the way Daisy kept talking in that fast, high-pitch voice of hers and when they went through the tunnel to get there all she could do was whine about how long it was and that this was so stupid.

But that wasn't even the worst part. When she actually talked to him (instead of talking just to hear her own voice) all she ever did was ask him about Sirius.

'What's Sirius' favorite color, Do you think Sirius likes me, Is Sirius really a good kisser, Do you think I stand a chance with Sirius, What's Sirius' favorite food', Sirius, Sirius, Sirius!

For a moment he forgot that HE was her date.

And all the questions on Sirius made him feel awful because it brought back the memories he had with him. This date wasn't helping him feel better, it was making him worse!

He'd never been so glad to be back at Hogwarts.

He wanted to say 'Well that was the most horrible date I'd ever been on; I hope never to relive the experience.' But instead settled with a brisk 'Good night' and went to bed.

He all but slammed the door when he returned.

Peter nearly fell out of his bed.

"Hey, you're early!" James said in surprise.

He let out a deep sigh "Yes, she's not my type. Though I'm sure you'll be happy to know I found another fangirl for you, Sirius."

Sirius looked up from his bed "Really? Ohh, that must not have been to pleasant."

"No it wasn't, now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to bed." He murmured angrily.

"Aren't you gonna change?" Peter asked timidly.

He scoffed as he laid face-down on his bed "Why bother…"

James sighed and got up to sit at the edge of his bed "Ah, come on Rem! Don't give up just like that! So the first date didn't work out, big deal! No one said it'd be a charm the first time! You gotta give it another shot."

"James, as happy as I am there are people like you who care about my love-life, I think we can pronounce it dead." He said from within the pillow.

Sirius frowned "Oh geez…come on Rem, when'd you get all depressive? That's not like you at all!"

Again, he did not lift his head.

James watched in surprise as Sirius got up and joined him at the edge of Remus' bed "Hey…come on, look up…please?"

Remus felt his heart quicken, he couldn't resist that voice no matter how badly he wanted to and looked up. He met those beautiful grey eyes and nearly gave into the urge he'd been fighting, to kiss him.

"You're no quitter Remus, I know you're not. Yeah, it hasn't been workin' out so far, but so what? You just gotta try again, you know. Come on, give it another shot." He said in a serious tone.

Remus sighed "But what girl will like me? Me, plain old Remus Lupin…"

"You're not plain and you're not old! You can be as exciting as anyone when you want to be! You just don't give yourself the chance to be!" Sirius said angrily.

"Oh? And how would you know?" Remus snapped, meeting his angry tone.

Sirius frowned "Well I went out with you once, didn't I?"

A strong silence followed that one.

Remus was completely taken by surprise. This was the first time Sirius mentioned what had happened, Remus was surprised he even knew! It wasn't exactly like he told when he remembered anything.

"Besides, I'm sure tons of girl's would like you if you just smiled a bit more." Sirius said quickly, trying to cover up the long pause.

Remus frowned "Yeah, right. Smiling, of course, that'll solve everything!"

"Well it's true! Girls like you more if you smile and you've got a pretty good one so they'd probably like you tons more!"

Remus scoffed "Right…"

Sirius frowned for a moment but slowly smirked "Come on…smile."

"No." he said, returning his face to the pillow.

Sirius inched closer "Smile, or you'll regret it…"

He got no response…so he leaned closer and tickled both Remus' sides.

Remus yelped and nearly jumped off the bed "Sirius don't!"

He grinned "Not unless you smile! Come on Rem, smile!"

Peter and James stepped back and watched in silence as Sirius made Remus nearly shout with laughter.

"Hey…did he ever tickle Remus before?" Peter whispered.

James blinked "I…don't know…"

"HAHAHAHA, HA-OK, OK! L-LOOK! HAHAHA, I-HAHAHA-I'M SM-SM-HAHAHA-SMILING!!!" Remus managed to chock out after a while.

Sirius grinned and pulled back "There, see? Guys, doesn't he look better when he smiles?"

Wordlessly James and Peter nodded.

Remus tried to catch his breath as he said "Well…so…what…"

Sirius smirked, pleased that he was right, "So, you should smile more. Give yourself a chance! There are tons of girls out there, chances are there's gotta be one just for you! Seriously, your moping is getting depressing."

Remus sighed and looked down at the floor "I don't know…"

"Come on. Please, if not for yourself, then for the rest of us so we can stand you! Kidding!" he added when Remus gave him a look "But come on, the miserable you is so annoying. Come on, for me?"

Remus looked up from his hand and met Sirius' eyes. "_Damn those eyes! How can I say no?_" he thought.

"…Oh…alright, alright…I'll give it another shot…" he muttered.

Sirius grinned "Great! Now, maybe someone else should try getting you another date huh? Lily was a bit off with this one. James has she already talked to anyone else?"

James blinked "Er, yea, but um…we can talk to her about it later or whatever…"

As they talked about what and who else to look for Remus looked down at the floor "_I'd only do this for you Sirius…_" he thought.

---

End A/N: Welp, that's all for the moment! PHEW! That chapter was hard. I didn't really know what I wanted in it so it was like…ugh. I felt it was a bit forced so sorry if it's not my best. Next chapter'll be better, I promise! Stay tuned!


	20. Chapter 20

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Crud, I'm sorry about this one. It's a bit short, but I don't exactly have a lot of time here. The AIMS (Arizona Institutional Measuring Standards) are comin' up and I can NOT fail them! Please settle with this, sorry, I'll update tomorrow, that one'll be much better then this I swear! Also, a buddy of mine has an english page she has to turn in (GAH! CURSE THE SCHOOLS!! THEY'RE RUINING THE FANFIC LIVES OF EVERYONE!!!) and she disguised it as a fic. It's called "Crumpled Trust". It's under the catagory Lilo and Stitch, but it's really her paper. She needs people to rate her on how well it was so she can know whether to fix it before turning it in. Now, you don't have to see it if you don't want to, I'm just doin' her a favor and tellin' as many people as I can to go check it out so she can see how well/bad she did on it before turning it in. Please, it'd mean a lot if you did, though you're not being forced to. Thank you tons! Ok, now that that's done with HERE'S CHAPTER 20!!! (sorry for the long speech! -- )

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune and Sam.

**Chapter 20**

Peter, James and Sirius sat on the ground in their dorm, James and Sirius trying to explain the game of poker to Peter once again, for what felt like at least the 50th time.

"Ok…so…a full house…beats 2 pairs and…um…"

James nodded "Yeah…aaaaand…remember, all them together, the same coat…"

Peter scrunched his face into a thoughtful look "Ummmmmm…uhhhhh…ummmm….hhhmmmmm…uhhhhhh…"

Sirius rolled his eyes "And a royal flush beats a full house. Wormtail, we've been over it 5 times already!" (For those who are wondering, I repeat, he gains memory back bit by bit and it's not always in order so I don't wanna hear anything about the name he used! Seriously, I'm in no mood.)

Peter frowned "Well…this is stupid! Let's play go fish again."

Both James and Sirius groaned in detest just as the door opened.

Sirius covered his mouth to keep from busting out laughing like James did at the sight of Remus, who'd just came in the room.

"Um, you…ok?" Sirius struggled to say without laughing.

Remus frowned, "Do I LOOK ok?"

All in all, no, he didn't. His hair was messed up more then any of them had ever seen it, his cloths seemed stretched out so his shoulder was out of his sleeve and he had kiss marks all over his face.

"Trying to get in her pants on the first date? That's a bit gutsy!" James said, still snickering.

Remus frowned as he wiped his face "Oh please! She was the one trying to get to me! Like a piranha or something! Geez…a romantic date to her is being stuck in a broom closet! I barely even talked to her and she's all over me!"

"Wow, you're lucky! Maybe I should ask Lily to set me up with someone." Peter muttered.

Remus scoffed "You can take all the other dates she's got for me, I quit."

They all looked up "What?!"

James frowned "Aw come on Rem!"

"NO! I've had enough of these disaster dates! Guys, lets face it, if there is a girl for me, she's not at Hogwarts." Remus muttered as he got his pajamas out of his trunk.

Well, he did have a point. Lily was bad when it came to choosing people for him to go out with.

For example:

"_Hi, I'm Tiffany!" a girl with light brown hair said with a smile._

_Remus smiled back "Remus. Nice to meet you."_

_She smiled "So, what do you have planned?"_

"_Well, I was thinking of going up to the astrology tower. The clouds cleared up so the star's will be bright." He said._

_She nodded "Kay."_

_He smiled; this was actually pretty ok. They were quiet as they made their way up and once at the top they stood in silence._

"…_Er…so, uh…Tiffany…um, what do you like?" he asked slowly, getting uncomfortable with all the quietness._

_Tiffany shrugged "I dunno. Stuff…"_

_He nodded "…Stuff…hm…"_

_It was quiet once more._

_She sighed, "Wow, it's really pretty tonight…"_

_He nodded "Yea…"_

"_It's a good atmosphere…you wanna dance?" she asked with that same smile._

_He blinked "Dance? Um, but…there's no music."_

"_Oh that's ok! Just pretend, here come on, dance with me! I've always wanted to dance under the stars!" she said, grabbing his hands._

_Before Remus could protest Tiffany had one hand on her waist and the other in her other hand and they did a waltz. Remus smiled, this was…ok, she was nice, much nicer then Daisy, yeah…it seemed really nice at first…but then…_

"_AH!" he exclaimed, almost pulling away._

_Tiffany winced, "Sorry! I kinda have to left feet!"_

_He chuckled slightly "Ah, ha…n-no, no, it's fine, really…AH!"_

"_Sorry!"_

"_OW!"_

"_Sorry!"_

"_W-wait- AHH!"_

"_Sorry, sorry!"_

_They wobbled a little bit more and became unbalanced. Tiffany lost her footing and let go of his other hand and as she fell forward hit him square in the jaw._

"_Oh! Oh Remus, I-I-I'm soooo sorry! Are you ok?" she asked, helping him up._

_Remus rubbed his jaw "Ahhh…er, i-it's ok, really…ow…you've got a good arm…"_

"_Oh let me try again, please? I promise I won't mess it up again!" she said._

_He shook his head "Erm, no, that's ok, really-"_

"_No I insist! Come on!" she said, putting one hand on her hip and grabbing his other hand._

_Remus inwardly groaned as they moved once more and as hard as he tried he couldn't help the 'Ow's that came out whenever she stepped on his foot. And from the way she stepped down, it almost felt as if she were doing it on purpose!_

_This unusual waltz went on a moment or two longer…until, Tiffany's shoe got caught on a loose tile and once more she fell, only this time, they'd be waltzing close to the edge of the tower and as she fell, she pushed Remus back over the edge!_

_It was frightening but, luckily, Remus' pants got caught over the edge so he didn't fall to a horrible death…but she did manage to destroy the pants as she helped him up._

_Tiffany was near tears with her apologize and needless to say that was the last time he went with her. Though, he was sure to let her down easy and insist it wasn't her fault._

_Another one: _

_Lily waited downstairs with a girl who had a short cut hair and round glasses._

"_Um, hi. I'm Remus." He said slowly._

_She nodded formally "Rebecca. Well, come on then."_

_As they walked out the door she started talking "Alright listen up. I like flowers on a date so we'll stop by the greenhouse to get some and don't even think about holding my hand or anything."_

_Remus blinked "Umm…o-kaaay…"_

_She smirked "Good. So, I was thinking we'd go up to Quidditch field, look at the stars, talk a little then go back. No hugging, no kissing, snuggling or anything like that, it's only the first date."_

_He nodded "Er, whatever you say."_

"_And another thing…"_

_Rebecca made so many rules that it was pretty much the only thing they talked about until they returned back to the Gryffindor common room._

_Her incisive rules were driving him mad, what's worse, he hadn't gotten a word in edge-wise! This was one girl he knew he wasn't going to see again!_

"_Well, I had a good time. Tomorrow, we'll go to lunch together and you'll bring me chocolates and-"_

"_Er, actually, I uh…I kinda have plans for lunch." He said quickly._

_For the first time all night she actually looked at him "O-oh…I see…yes, well, I still had a lovely time tonight." In that quick instant a brief look of shock and hurt crossed her face, but it was gone almost as soon as it came and was replaced with her usual, almost teacher-ish demeanor._

_Inwardly he smiled, she was taking it better then he thought she would._

"_So, did you enjoy tonight to?" she asked slowly._

_He looked up "Hm? Oh, oh yes. I did, thank you for the…lovely…evening." Lying never really set well with him, but in this case, he was willing to make an exception._

"_Good…so, tell me…did you, like me?" she asked more slowly then the first question._

_He quickly nodded "Yes! Yes, I did."_

"_Did? So you DON'T like me now?!" she said, suddenly speaking in a loud voice._

"_I- wha?"_

"_You…YOU'RE A HORRIBLE DATE!"_

"_But-"_

_**SMACK!!!**_

_She slapped him hard across the cheek and marched up to the girl's dorm and slammed the door behind her. Remus stood in the common room for a moment, rubbing his cheek and trying to understand what just happened._

_He walked up to his room, still pondering it. And as always, James, Peter and Sirius were all still awake so they could talk about how the date went. When he walked in all of them stared at him for a moment._

"_What happened?" Peter asked._

_Remus shook his head "I don't know! One minute we were talking the next she calls me a horrible date and slaps me across the face!"_

_James blinked "Well…did you say anything?"_

"_No! Well, yes, but…kinda I…ugh, I don't know! Girls are crazy!" he all but yelled, putting a pillow to his face._

_---_

There were so many other ones that were just as disastrous, if not more, as the first two. One had an allergic reaction to the flowers Peter suggested; the other had a jealous ex who threatened to beat him to a pulp, all kinds of screw ups!

But no more.

Remus sighed, now ready for bed "Tomorrow I'm telling Lily it's over and not to talk to anymore girls."

"But you can't just give up!" Sirius said, surprising them all.

Remus looked up angrily "Why the hell do you care so much?!" and he wanted nothing more then to add 'was going out with me so traumatic you won't feel safe until I'm going out with someone else?!' but resisted the urge.

He frowned "Because you're my friend! And, that whole thing with the potion, I know you really got screwed over. Havin' to pretend to be with me, it probably made people look at you different. You probably got all kinds of crap for it and it wasn't even your fault! Helping you restore your image is the least I can do for throwing it in the toilet to begin with."

Remus looked at him for a long time then scoffed "Right."

Sirius frowned "It's true! Watch, you know what? I'LL talk to someone and I bet you anything you'll have a good time on this one!"

Remus again scoffed "Sure, I'm holding my breath."

Sirius growled, "God you're stubborn! You watch, tomorrow, you'll see!"

Remus smirked "Right…goodnight then." and lay back in his bed.

Sirius huffed and thought, "_Oh, now, it's on! I was just trying to help but now! I'll get Remus a date, if it kills me!_" as he pulled his blankets over himself.

James and Peter stood in their spots for a moment.

Peter blinked "Uh-"

"I dunno." James muttered, going to his bed.

Peter shook his head and blew out the candles as he made his way back to his bed.

---

It was Saturday so Sirius had all day to find a willing girl to go out with Remus.

"You're not gonna find anyone." Remus said with an annoyed look as they all went down to breakfast.

Sirius frowned "Will so! You wait, I bet 10 boxes of chocolate frogs I'll get you a date by tonight and it'll be someone you like!"

"Make it 20 and you're on!" he said, holding his hand out.

Sirius was slightly taken aback by that, he didn't expect Remus to take that last part seriously…

"What, you doubting your abilities?" Remus teased.

Sirius frowned and grabbed his hand "Deal! And if you lose you…um…you have to…to do my homework, for the rest of the month!"

James and Peter watched on in silence as the bet was made; James shaking his head and Peter wondering why it mattered that much.

Sirius grinned as a group of girls walked by "Watch, I'll get you a date!" and ran up to them.

Once he left James turned to Remus "You just set him up."

Remus sighed sadly "I know. There's no way he'll find anyone, but the fact that he cares so much just makes me love him even more…and the chocolate frogs I'm getting out of it doesn't hurt either!" he added with a small smile.

James shook his head "I'm never going to understand you Rem."

He shrugged "Well, it's probably better that way."

---

"Ew, him? Pass. I'd gladly go out with you though!"

Sirius sighed "No, thanks anyway." and slinked away.

He ran up to the next group of girls he saw "Hey!"

Three of the squealed "Oh god…Sirius Black is…is talking to us!"

He backed away "Err…n-never mind…" and quickly ran to the Great Hall where his friends had already sat down.

Remus gave him a knowing smirk "So, find no one yet?"

Sirius scowled "You wait! I'll find someone!"

Remus chuckled and shook his head "Whatever you say Sirius."

He frowned and got up determinedly and went all around the Gryffindor table asking all the girls he spotted.

"No way."

"Sorry, I'll pass."

"Are you sure YOU wouldn't rather go out with me?"

"No."

"Sorry, I'm already taken."

"Pass."

"EW!"

"I'm spoken for. Thanks for asking though."

"I thought he was gay…"

"No."

"Pass."

"No."

"Pass."

"No."

"Pass."

"Pass."

"Pass!"

"NO."

"No!"

"NOOO!"

"Pass!"

"No!"

He panted as he came to the other end of the table where a girl with curly brown hair sat with a few friends. He tried to catch his breath as he tapped her shoulder "I…um, excuse me?"

She turned around and gasped "S-Sirius!"

He smiled somewhat exhaustedly "Hi. Um, listen, I was just wondering, are you busy tonight?"

The girl and all her friends broke out in giggles and looked at one another. Sirius raised an eyebrow in confusion "_…O-kaaay…_" Once the girls gathered themselves the girl he spoke to smiled brightly up at him.

"Yes- er no! Uh, I mean…oh gosh…no, I don't have anything going on…what did you have in mind?" she asked, still giggling as she spoke.

He smiled "Well, have I got a great offer to for you! How would you like a date with-"

"AH! I'd love to!" she exclaimed happily.

Sirius blinked "Really? Wow that was fast."

"Oh I knew you'd come around! So, what time? When? Do you want me to come up to your dorm or just wait in the common room for you?" she said with a wide smile.

Sirius took a step back "Whoa! Hold on a sec, you didn't let me finish! See, I was wondering if you wanted to go on a date with the most…um, sensitive, warm hearted…er…best guy in Gryffindor…"

The girls all glanced at one another with wide smiles.

"One of my best mates, Remus Lupin!" he finished with a grin.

The instant he said 'Remus' the smiles from the girls vanished. The friends around her all gained looks of fear while the girl herself just stared at him blankly.

"…What?"

He smiled "Yeah! See, he's a great guy so-"

The girl held up a hand to silence him.

Sirius blinked in confusion "Hm?"

She sighed and slowly asked "Wh…do you know my name?"

He titled his head "Uhh…should I?"

She sat in silence, that blank look still on her face. Then, she got to her feet and as she did all of her friends flinched. Sirius slowly got the feeling he'd done something wrong as she picked up a pie from the table.

Without even looking at him the girl walked passed him to the end of the table where James, Peter and Remus sat. Sirius winced while the rest of the student body broke out in laughter as she promptly plummet the pie over Remus' head and gave him a hard punch in the arm then proceeded to the big doors as if she'd done nothing unusual.

He quickly went back to their end of the table "Ohhh…"

Remus slowly took the pie off his head "Well…it's not pumpkin juice but…"

James looked up at Sirius "Oh…tell me you did NOT just ask _**Samantha Briken**_ to go out with Remus."

"Er sorry, I didn't know that…well, you've made some enemies I see…" Sirius muttered apologetically.

Remus frowned "Yes, I have, no thanks to you. No don't help, I can do it!" he growled when Sirius attempted to wipe some of the pie off his hair.

He silently pointed his wand to himself and bubbles came from nowhere to wash him up.

"It seemed like a good spell to learn, considering how recently I always seem to be getting messy!" he snapped when Peter opened his mouth.

Peter quickly shut his mouth.

Remus sighed "Sirius why don't you just forget it? I mean, lets be honest with ourselves here, who'd want to go out with me when there are people like you out there!"

"But-"

Remus frowned "No, you know what, forget the bet. It never happened now will you stop making me look stupid!?"

Sirius sighed, "I was just trying to help-"

"Well you know what, if you're really my friend and you REALLY wanna help me, stop trying to help me!" he all but shouted as he got up from the table and went out the doors.

The remaining Marauders were silent for a moment.

Sirius sighed and sat down "Wow, I really managed to screw things up with him didn't I?" he muttered as he bit into some toast.

James put a hand on his shoulder "Hey, it's not your fault. Remus knows it's not your fault, he's just…er…" the sentence trailed off.

Sirius frowned "I just thought…since it was me who ruined his life, I should at least try to help him out! But…well, if he doesn't want my help then fine, I guess…he practically just said we weren't friends anymore anyway…" he scowled "Well, bugger on him then! Who needs to be friends with _Remus_!? Even his name is stupid! In fact, forget that git! All I need is you guys by my side, right?! Yeah! And…and we can be called 'The three amigos!' We'd be able to do loads of stuff without _Remus_!"

James shook his head "Sirius, would you give it a rest? Look, Remus is just a little…er, confusing, right now, but he still wants to be friends!"

Sirius frowned "Well fine! If you guys aren't with me on this I'll…I'm…ugh, I'm goin' outside…" he muttered dolefully as he dragged his feet to the door.

Peter sighed sadly "Gee, when did life get so complicated?"

"When both our idiots decided to be idiots together." James murmured, returning his attention to his food.

---

End A/N: Ok! Well, that's all I've got for this chapter. I was gonna add more, but I just don't have the time right now! It'll all be in the next chapter, hope this wasn't to short for you! Thanks for still reading, next will be SO much better, tons more drama, I promise! Thanks!


	21. Chapter 21

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! I hope there are still people out there reading and whoever's around, thanks! If you liked the last chapter I'm glad you stuck around! So, without further ado, I present chapter 21!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, their mine.

**Chapter 21**

Sirius' wasn't really angry anymore, but rather gloomy. I mean, think about it, if you'd just screwed up your friend's life wouldn't you want to help them out and then feel worse when they say your help isn't helping?

He sighed as he plopped down next to the lake "When'd life get so complicated?"

"Oh life's always been complicated, you've just adapted to it well enough but now a slight change in your life makes it seem even more so then it was before. And the sad part is it'll always be complicated, no matter who you are or where you go." A voice said next to him.

Sirius nearly jumped out of his skin. He'd just been talking aloud and not only that but he was answered by someone! For a moment he thought he was going mad, but when he looked, he noticed he wasn't alone.

"Oh! Er, sorry, I didn't see there…"

He was in such a state of gloom he hadn't noticed if anyone else was there or not. And the person he'd apologized to was a girl. He stared at her in great surprise for a moment before finding his voice "Hey…you…you look a lot like-"

The girl chuckled "Oh yes, I do get that a lot. And it's quiet alright that you didn't see me. Not many people do. You seem to be having some problems though, talking out loud to yourself. What's on your mind?"

Sirius gave her a look "…I'd don't particularly feel comfortable telling my problems to some random stranger."

She shrugged "Ok. You don't have to or anything, just tryin' to help. Usually when people start talking aloud, it's cuz they're stressed and really just need to tell their problems to someone." she spoke in a kind voice, not really in a suck-up way…it was almost as if she really _did_ want to help him out, which would be strange considering they'd never met before now.

"_Oh what the hell, I'll bite_." Sirius thought.

He sighed "Alright. Well, I have this friend and I kinda screwed up his life, so, to make it up to him, I was trying to find him a girl he'd like but I just ended up screwing that up as well and getting him pied and punched."

The girl nodded "Ah yes, that was what the big commotion inside was. That Sam girl has a nasty temper on her, huh?"

"Yeah and now, Remus hates me. He told me not to help him but I feel like I have to! It's like, I'm in his debt or something! I don't know what I should do…" Sirius muttered.

The girl smiled "Well, did you ever think that maybe a girlfriend isn't what he wants?"

Sirius blinked "What do you mean? Sure he does! I mean, he wants to show everyone he's not gay! I mean, he had to pretend in front of the whole school he was just so I wouldn't kill myself! Of course that's what he wants."

The girl shrugged "Well, then maybe you should let HIM decide on what he wants. I'm sure that'd make him happy."

Sirius opened his mouth but no noise came out…she did have point.

He bit his lip, trying to think of a way to counter that "…Wow, you're really smart."

She smiled "Thanks."

And she was; she was smart, pretty, a really nice girl…

Suddenly, a light bulb came into existence there and shone brightly over Sirius' head (Hahaha, not really, but you know!) and he looked back at the girl "What's your name?"

"Seri."

Sirius eye's widened "Are you serious?!"

"I'm about as Sirius as you are." She said with a giggle.

Sirius frowned "Ha, ha, I've never heard that one before. No I mean, do you mean that?"

She grinned "Actually I do. Strange isn't it? You know, I was once told that all over the world there's at least one person who's like a double to you (1). I didn't believe that theory till I came to this school. Funny isn't it?"

Sirius blinked "Er, yeah. So what house are you in?"

"Ravenclaw."

"Ravenclaw! No wonder I've never seen you before!" Sirius muttered.

Seri shrugged "Well, it's not like I haven't seen you around. I'm sure you've seen me around before, it's just now is the only time you've acknowledged my existence."

Sirius grinned "Well, would you mind coming to the Gryffindor tower with me?"

She shrugged "Sure. It's not like I've got anything better to do."

"Great! Come with me!" he said, grabbing her by the wrist.

---

Remus lay face down in his bed; he seemed to be doing that a lot more recently.

He sighed "I think I was too hard on him but…dammit, this has gone far enough! Why can't I just forget the past and live in right now? I want to be Sirius' friend but my stupid heart doesn't take it as just friendship!"

"The grip he has on it is tighter now then ever. He keeps trying to help me out…he keeps caring about me like this…it's almost as if he loves me or something. Well he does, but as a friend! Not like how I wish he did…" he mumbled to his pillow.

And don't even get him started on physical attraction! Sirius was the only one who he could really find attractive anymore and it bothered him! His face, his hair…he remembered the last time they were together, like that…the scent of them together was all he'd been able to think about when Sirius came around…

Remus turned over slightly and covered his face "Why does he taunt me like this?"

The question went unanswered and he nearly sprang up from his bed as the door suddenly opened by, "_Oh great…_"

Sirius grinned widely "Rem, you gotta come downstairs!"

Remus sighed "Ok but…look, what I said in the Hall, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sound like such a jerk. We still friends?"

Sirius smiled "Yeah, course we are! In fact, that's why you have to come down, right now!"

Remus chuckled and shook his head as he got up "What could be downstairs that's gotten you all worked up?"

"I just won the bet." He said with a cheeky grin.

Remus blinked "What?"

"Come on!" Sirius repeated, running out the door.

Remus scoffed and followed after "Great…I thought we'd agreed that was done."

"I didn't agree to it!" Sirius said behind him.

Remus gave him an annoyed look and followed slowly after, not exactly thrilled about meeting another girl. But that changed, it changed as soon as Sirius moved out of the way and he saw who he had dragged up there.

His mouth fell open, not so much at the fact that she wasn't a Gryffindor but because of who she looked like. She had just above shoulder length black hair that had it's only natural grace, strikingly light brown eyes that shone strangely on their own and…and she was practically a female version of Sirius! Minus the eye color and smell.

Siri smirked "What, you've never seen a Ravenclaw in the Gryffindor dorm before?"

Remus quickly closed his mouth "R-Ravenclaw?"

She smiled and held out her hand "I'm Seri Nolen."

He looked over at Sirius "Seri?"

"Um, I know we look sort of alike but don't get confused. **I'M **Seri, he's Siri**us**." She said.

Sirius laughed "Isn't she a hoot? And she's exactly what you like! She's smart, she's funny, she's pretty! Come on Rem, give it a try!"

He blinked "Um…er, Hello, I…I'm Remus Lupin." He said and grabbed her outstretched hand.

She smiled and shook "Nice to meet you."

Sirius nudged Remus "Go on, just ask her!" he whispered.

"Are you crazy?! We just met!" he hissed back.

Sirius frowned "Come on, I brought her up here for ya, and you've been doin' that for the past few weeks anyway!"

"Well yeah but-"

"Please Rem, do it for me, please? Just one date this one date, if you hate it then I lose!"

Remus bit his lip, once more unable to deny Sirius' pleading voice, then looked back to Seri "Um, look, I uh…I know I just barely met you but…um, well…would you like to go out with me some time?"

Sirius elbowed him "Today!"

"Er, today?"

Seri put a thoughtful hand to her chin "I dunno…will Sirius have to be there to tell you what to say?"

Sirius laughed "Sorry! Just tryin' to help!"

Seri smiled "Well, whether Sirius decideds to join us or not…I'd like very much to go out with you."

Remus blinked "You will? Oh! Oh um…ok…well…uh…what do you wanna do?"

Seri shrugged "A walk around campus is good with me, just to get to know each other first off."

"Ok. Um, when?"

Seri grinned "Well…how about right now?"

He nodded "Er, yeah, ok…"

"Sooo…lets go." She said, taking him by the hand.

He nodded "Right…er, see you, Sirius…"

Sirius smirked as they left "Bye. Hope you like doing my homework!" and laughed as he went back upstairs.

---

"So uh…well, this might sound stupid but…Sirius was the one who asked you if you wanted to go out with me right?" Remus said slowly as they walked down the hall.

Seri shook her head "Nope. You just did. Sirius asked me to go up to the Gryffindor tower."

Remus' eyes widened "R-really?"

"Yeah. Why? Are you surprised?"

He sighed "Well…it's just recently, he and Lily Evans have been setting me up with girls, I never really asked anyone myself."

Seri smiled "I'm sure they were only tryin' to help you out. And besides, you asked me."

Remus blushed lightly "Yea…heh, I guess I did!"

It was honestly the first time he'd asked anyone, girl or boy, out on his own…he laughed…he didn't know why, but he began to laugh and continued to laugh until his sides hurt.

And as we all know, laughing is contagious and as he laughed Seri started to laugh to.

"Hahaha, w-wait, wait! Wha…hahaha, what are we- we hahaha, laughing about?" she struggled to ask.

Remus grabbed his sides "Hahaha I, hahaha I have no idea! Hahahahahaha!"

The unknown laughter continued for until they reached outside, then Remus was able to calm himself down enough to speak.

"I…ha…I-I think it's because…this is the first time I've ever gone a date, on my OWN accord…" he said slowly.

Seri smiled "Ha, I told him."

Remus looked at her "Told who what?"

"Well, I just met Sirius today. He sat by the lake where I usually sit, he seemed really depressed; he didn't even notice me when he sat right next to me. I asked him what was on his mind and he said he felt bad, like he was indebted to you because he screwed up your life and felt even worse because every time he tried to help you he ended up screwing that up to." She said casually.

Remus frowned "In debt? Why on earth would he think that? I'm not holding him to anything!"

Seri shrugged "Not sure. Anyways, I told him 'Well, then maybe you should let HIM decide on what he wants. I'm sure that'd make him happy.' And whaddya know, it did!"

Remus nodded slowly "Yes…I…I suppose it did…"

"_Sort of…he really feels indebt?_" he thought was they walked along.

For a moment it was quiet as they walked around the grounds.

Remus looked over at her "So…you just barely met Sirius today?"

"Officially yes, but I have seen him around school before. Oh don't worry, I'm not one of his many fangirls. No offence, but the fact that he looked almost just like me is creepy. It'd be like liking myself. Weird…"

Remus laughed "Yeah, that would be pretty strange."

Again a pause.

"And…you're not related to him in anyway?" he asked, still unable to believe that two people could look so similar and not be related.

She looked up thoughtfully "Well, I don't think so. I'm a muggle-born see, and I heard that all the Blacks are pure-blood so-"

"Oh! Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know."

She shrugged "Eh, whatever. We all look the same on the inside, why should our blood look any different? I mean, unless you guys have green blood that glitters with some sort of inner working magic or something." She added jokingly.

Remus rolled his eyes but still smiled as he did "Right, that's it. 'Pure-bloods' have green blood."

They laughed a while and talked some more as they walked around. Remus smiled, this was actually going nicely. Nothing had impaled him, no jealous boyfriends, nothing! It had to be one of the best dates he'd had in a while.

"_Aside from the ones with Sirius._" A stupid little voice in his head added.

"_Stop thinking about Sirius! That's over, he didn't even like me on his own to begin with! This is about Seri…hm, she's so witty, smart…pretty to._" he told the voice.

She was pretty, which made him wonder…

"Seri, have you ever had any boyfriends before?" he asked slowly.

To his surprise Seri shook her head with a huge grin "Nope! You're the first."

Remus blushed slightly "_Well, I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm your boyfriend but…_"

"It's weird. Guys don't really like me. People don't really like me actually. I've only got a few friends." She said carelessly.

Remus frowned at that "What? Why? Who wouldn't like you? I mean, you're smart, you're funny-"

Seri giggled "You flatter me Remus, but not everyone thinks so. I guess I'm what others would call weird. Which, to be honest, is weird in itself because to me _they_ seem weird. Weird isn't it?"

Remus chuckled "Yeah…still, I know how you feel. I wasn't always as liked as I am now."

"Oh, so there was a time when the female population hated you more then they do now? Ha, I'm kidding!" she added quickly as he frowned.

He smirked ruffled up her hair playfully, another thing difference from Sirius, she was shorter.

"Oh shut up. No, well, actually, I meant not being liked as a whole, by everyone…but, you can't dwell on those sort of memories can you?"

Seri shook her head "Nope. Just gotta keep movin' forward, 'cuz you never know what the future holds for you."

Remus nodded "Right."

"_I think Sirius said that before to_(2)_…wow, she really is a lot like Sirius. Well, except her eyes...and her height, plus she has boobs…and is missing-_" Forgetting he was in the company of another person, Remus smacked his forehead to stop that thought right in its tracks "Bad brain." He muttered.

Seri blinked "You ok?"

His eyes widened slightly "_Oh crap! Did I just do that? Man, I have been alone to long..._"

"Er, yes, I'm fine! I just, err…I kinda, um…"

A sly smirk came to Seri's face "Ohhh, hehehe, someone's having dirty thoughts!" she said in a sing-song way.

The red in his cheeks deepened "I was not!"

"Oh, so you always get this red in the face or is it a sunburn?" she asked.

He gave her a playful swat "Shut up."

She laughed "I'm just kidding!"

He frowned playfully "Sure you are."

She giggled "I am! Hey, what kind of wand do you have?"

"Oh, I've got a Rowan and a dragon's heartstring, twelve inches if I remember right." He said slowly.

Seri smiled "Hm, Ollivander's right?"

He nodded "That's right."

"Well, mine's an Ash with a unicorn's hair. Seven inches."

There was a small pause.

Seri smiled innocently "Can I look at yours?"

Remus blinked, that was a strange request "Um, sure. Here you go." he said, taking it out of his pocket.

At first she looked it over with an interested look on her face, then looked up at him with a sly grin "Thanks!" and took off, not really fast as if she intended to actually steal it, but fast enough for Remus to chase after her.

"Oy! Give me back my wand!" he yelled after her.

She looked over her shoulder with a grin "Gonna have to caught me first!"

Remus smirked "I'm a lot faster then I look!"

"That's funny, so am I!" as she said this she quickened her pace.

Remus blinked as she dashed ahead "_…She really is faster then she looks…_"

The little chase dragged on for a good fifteen minutes before Seri started to slow down. Remus grinned at her weakness and sprinted as she slowed then tackled her to the ground "Gotcha!"

"You can run fast, but only for a short time!" he said, panting slightly as he got his wand back.

Seri frowned playfully "No fair! I want a rematch!"

Remus smiled "Sore loser!"

Seri stuck her tongue out "Nyeh!" which made Remus laugh.

She chuckled and looked to the side "Hey look, the sun is setting."

Remus looked to see the sun as it went behind the mountains and the sky looked orange and pink and purple "…Yeah…it's beautiful…"

And as if suddenly realizing he still had Seri under him he scrambled to his feet "Um, er, sorry. You wanna go back in then?"

Seri didn't seem to notice his embarrassment as she still looked up at the sky "No. I've never watched the sunset outside the castle before. Lets watch it, we can go in after."

Remus smiled and sat down next to her "Alright."

Seri sat up to and propped herself against his arm as they watched the sun go down over the mountains. They didn't move or say anything to ruin the moment until sun was completely out of view and the sky was dark, lit by nothing but the stars and half moon.

Remus sighed "Wow…you know, I never really sat back to watch the sunset before…"

Seri smiled "It's magical, isn't it? Even more when you have someone to watch it with…"

Remus looked down at her; she was smiling up at him.

A small blush came to his face as he stood up and held a hand out to her "Come on, we better get back before someone finds out we're out after curfew."

Seri nodded and took his hand to help her stand.

Then, hand-in-hand, the two headed back to the castle.

As they walked, Seri looked up at the sky "Oh look! You can see the constellations! Wow, we should stay out late more often!"

Remus chuckled "Astrology-lover?"

She grinned "You know it! Back in the muggle town where my parents live, the streetlights are on ALL the time, I can never really see any of them! But out here…it's gorgeous…oh look! The moon's almost full again…"

At that, the smile on Remus face dropped to a frown "Yes…I suppose it is." He murmured coldly.

Seri blinked "Hm?"

He quickly forced a smile "Nothing. Come on, it's getting a little to cold for my liking out here." and still holding her hand, Remus started to jog to the castle.

Seri gave him a questioning look, but decided not to ask. Instead she grinned and let go of his hand, "Race you back to the castle! Ready set GO!" then took off, leaving him in the dust.

Remus smiled as he ran after her "Cheater! You got a head start!"

"Well you better pick the pace up then!" Seri laughed over her shoulder.

It wasn't long before they were at the castle doors. Both were sure to wipe their feet on the grass outside before going in so they wouldn't get Filch on their tails.

They walked down the hallway together until they came to where the stairway to Gryffindor split off.

Seri smiled "I really had a great time with you Remus."

Remus nodded "Yeah, I had a good time to."

"So…I'll see you tomorrow? Maybe…we could have a picnic by the lake?" she said slowly.

Remus grinned "Absolutely!"

Seri smiled widely, her eyes sparkling "Great! I can't wait. Bye, I'll see you tomorrow." And, hesitating slightly, (more in the way like she didn't know what she should do, not in a repulsed kind of way) she leaned up and gave him a small peck on the lips.

Not open mouth or anything, just an innocent little kiss. So small you could hardly tell it happened, the kind of kiss that make old people go 'Awww'.

For the first time Seri's face was the one that was red as she turned to her stairway "Bye!"

Remus grinned and waved as he went up the stairs, she was cute!

"_Wow! That was actually…well, that was fun!_" he thought.

---

Peter had fallen asleep already, but James and Sirius were still awake, playing chess on the floor.

"Hm…he's late this time." James said with a smile.

Sirius grinned "What'd I tell ya! I knew this girl was special!"

"Yeah, well…don't get to cocky! Remember, I said if he had a good time but doesn't go out with her again tomorrow, you lose." James said.

Sirius nodded "Right. And Pete's bet was, he didn't enjoy himself at all and doesn't see her again."

James smiled "No offence to Pete, but I hope he's wrong."

Sirius nodded and it went quiet for a moment...

Both nearly jumped as the door suddenly opened by a rather happy Remus.

"Hey guys!" he said cheerfully.

Sirius and James exchanged looks.

"So, you had a good time I take it?" Sirius asked slowly.

Remus grinned and nodded "Oh yeah. Seri's great. You were right about her Sirius."

"_Looks like Peter's out 5 galleons_."

"And uh, are you gonna see her again? Tomorrow?" James asked fearfully.

Remus nodded, unable to detect the worried way it was asked "Of course!"

James groaned while Sirius put a victorious fist in the air "YES! Ha! Pay up James!"

Remus frowned "Guys!"

Sirius grinned "Sorry mate, just wanted to make a bit of a profit. Cupid needs pay you know."

James grudgedly put 5 galleons in Sirius' hand "Thanks a lot Remus."

"Servers you right for betting on my personal life." He said, unable to suppress a small smile.

James grinned "Ah, but still! Aside from losin' my bet, I'm real happy for you Rem!"

"_Now maybe things can get back to normal._" He added in his head.

Remus smiled "Thank you. And it's all thanks to Sirius. Thanks for being so persistent, even after I acted like a total git about it."

Sirius grinned, "My pleasure Moony! Oh, however, there's one part of the agreement you've yet to finish…"

Remus rolled his eyes but smiled "Oh alright. Which is due first, Potions or History of Magic?"

---

End A/N: Hm. I think that chapter went rather nicely. Now peoples DON'T panic! Overall, this IS a Sirius/Remus fic, however...I just loooove puttin' obsticals in the way! BWAHAHAHAHAHAH! I'M SUCH AN EVIL GENIUS!!! Well, I hope you enjoyed it thus far, how can anything get worse you ask...well, you'll have to review if you want me to update!

(1): That IS an actual theory, one I didn't believe until I moved to Coolidge, where I found someone who looks almost EXACTLY like my step mom! I kid you not, I was freaked out! And they have no relation to each other because the person who looks like her is from INDIA! And, it's been known to happen else were to! People who have NO relation to each other look so similar it's scary! Seriously!

(2): Sirius said that in chapter 6 if you wanna go back and take a look. Thanks for reading!


	22. Chapter 22

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! First off, I'd like to say, sorry for the wait! I have some SERIOUS cramming to do, so forgive me for not being as quick to my updating as I usually do but I HAVE to study so you'll just have to be satisfied with when I get the time to update. Again, SOOOORRY (sadness)! Also, apart from that, wow! Again, you've all managed to surprise me! The majority of you seemed to like Seri for one and none of you thought I was absolutely insane for using the 'look-alike' theory! In fact, most of you agreed that you either had or knew a look-alike. Glad I'm not the only one who's seen it. Thanks for stickin' around peoples, here's chapter 22!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam, Seri and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, their mine.

**Chapter 22**

_**Remus walked casually to the dorm, he'd forgotten his books and classes were about to start. Once he stepped into the room however, all the light vanished and he stood in the dark.**_

**"_Where'd the sun go?" he wondered aloud._**

_**As if his voice were a match the candles they had in the room were suddenly all lit. Now he could see, though not as good as he might have if the sun were out.**_

_**He jumped back in surprise as the room suddenly filled with light, but also, because he wasn't alone in the room anymore. He didn't have to turn around to know either. The luscious smell that had tempted him for a while now came to his nose and he knew who was there.**_

**"_Sirius? Wh-what are you doing in here? When'd you GET in here?" he asked bewilderedly as he turned to face him, proving his sense of smell correct._**

_**For a moment Sirius didn't say anything, just stared at him with a strange look on his face.**_

_**Then he smiled, his eyes shining with something "What, you're not glad to see me?" he asked in a silky whisper.**_

_**The tone alone made Remus freeze up, there was something about the way he spoke that made him stay were he was.**_

_**Sirius walked, very slow strides, towards him…it was tantalizing how slowly he moved. Remus bit his lip in anticipation as her drew nearer. Then, they were face to face.**_

**_The look in those gray eyes became clearer as he stared at him, his eyes now clear and the look __was indisputably_…**

_**Lust.**_

**"…_Well? Aren't you?" he asked._**

_**Remus blinked, he'd been watching Sirius' lips but the words didn't seem to cut through "Yes- er no! Um, I mean…wh-what do you want?"**_

_**Sirius grinned, "I want what you want…and don't pretend you don't want it. I see the way you look at me and I thought I should let you know, the feeling's mutual."**_

_**With that said, he lunged forward and pulled Remus' lips to his. Remus was so overwhelmed he didn't fight back as Sirius led them both to one of the beds behind them.**_

_**To Remus' surprise he felt his bare back touch the cool sheets. When did they get naked?! Sirius no longer had clothing as he pressed down against him, rubbing their hips together.**_

_**The contact felt soooo good, but it also brought back Remus' sense of reality.**_

**"_W- wait, Sirius, I can't…I-I'm going out with Seri! I can't do this." He gasped as Sirius pulled away from him._**

_**Sirius still smiled as he looked down at him "And why is that? Do you love her?"**_

**"_I…I…I don't know, maybe. Look I can't-" he stammered._**

**"_Don't you find me __attractive__?" as he said this he moved his hips once more, only harder against his._**

_**Remus eyes fluttered and he let out a low moan "Yeeeesss…"**_

_**Sirius smirked "Yes? Yes what? Yes you do or don't, find me attractive?"**_

_**Remus closed his eyes "Yes…I…uh, I mean, I don't know-"**_

**"_You don't know?" Sirius asked tauntingly, whispering in his ear._**

_**The small contact made him bit back a moan as he struggled to say "Yes. I mean…whether I do or don't doesn't matter. I-I can't…this is wrong, I'm with Seri."**_

_**Sirius chuckled "Oh Remy, you mustn't make yourself so obvious."**_

_**He looked up "What'd you mean?"**_

_**Sirius smiled "Hm, clearly you're just using Seri to hide your feelings for me, and that's not right. If you ask me, you really shouldn't play with the girl's emotions like that. You're leading her on..."**_

_**Remus shook his head "W-what?! N-no! Th-that's not true! I…I really care for Seri-"**_

**"_But do you love her?"_**

_**He hesitated "…I…w-well…I don't really-"**_

**"_See? You can't even answer a simple question…"_**

_**Remus blushed and looked away.**_

_**Sirius chuckled "Well, I don't know if it means anything to YOU…but, I love you."**_

_**At that Remus' eyes snapped open and he looked back at him "Wha?"**_

_**Sirius grinned "Ohhh, now I've got your attention eh?"**_

_**Remus tried to look uncaring about it, but failed miserably at it as he stared at the fading candle light. It was fading because the flames were almost to the very bottom of the candles…**_

_**Sirius turned his head so Remus was looking him straight in the eyes "I said I love you."**_

_**For a moment that was it, they just stared at each other as a true understanding was spoken with silence…Sirius leaned down once more and Remus closed his eyes as he captured his lips in a much softer, yet somehow more meaningful, kiss.**_

_**The light from the candle was gone, it was put out by the wax and it was pit black.**_

Remus gasped as woke and sat up in his bed.

The sun wasn't even up yet, the room was pitch black.

He groaned and rubbed his eyes "I've been with Seri for weeks now…and I'm still having these dreams?" he whispered to the darkness.

From the looks of it, it had to have been about 3 or 4 in the morning. He'd been having dreams like that since Sirius was 'cured'. He hated to put it like that, it sounded as if loving him were some sort of disease. But either way, those were the dreams he had and now, was the way he woke up from them (though now that he was going out with Seri, his dream Sirius had taken up the habit of telling him to stop 'leading her on').

He was just glad it was always dark and everyone was asleep when he woke. As quietly as he could, he got out of bed and got his cloths from his trunk. After dreams like those, he could never get back to sleep, so he just decided to wake up.

Though it was dark, he glanced over at Sirius bed, where he could imagine he was sleeping and the smell of him was strong, almost over bearing…his dream felt so right…

But he shook his head and walked to the door.

"Another day, another cold shower to start it off with…" he muttered to himself as he left.

---

The sun shone brightly in the window, lighting the room.

James groaned as the light became too bright for him to ignore any longer. He slowly opened his eyes and let out a huge yawn then sat up, his eyes half closed.

"_What day is it again?_" was the first thought to come to his head "_…Oh right, Sunday._"

With another yawn he opened his eyes to see the room as blurry as ever. Automatically, his hand stretched out to the counter and groped around blindly for his glasses.

Once he found them, he grabbed them and put them on. Everything gained its focus again and he was surprised to see he wasn't the only one awake.

"Moony? What are you doin' awake?" he asked, though softer then usual seeing as how he'd just woken up.

Remus was sitting in his bed with three books open and about 4 different parchments he was writing on and when he looked up, he looked like he hadn't slept a wink.

Still, a small smile came to his face when he looked up "Good morning. Just thought I'd get a jump on some of the extra work I've got."

James blinked for a moment until his brain caught up "Oh right, you're bet with Sirius."

Remus nodded "Yep."

James frowned "Well, just cuz you're doin' his work, doesn't mean you have to deprive yourself of sleep mate!"

Remus sighed "I'm fine."

"You sure? Seriously, you look exhausted. What time'd you wake up?"

Remus shook his head "I said I'm fine! It's not the work that woke me up anyway…"

James leaned a bit off his head "Oh?"

Remus sighed, debating with himself whether he should tell James or not about his dreams.

"_Well, I've been able to trust him with everything that's happened so far right?_" he reasoned.

"_But even he didn't seem to…ecstatic about this whole thing to begin with…_" a voice in his head countered.

In the end, his voice of reason won the battle and he caved in.

He looked around to make sure Sirius was still sleeping before he spoke and even when he did, James had to lean close to hear it "Ok, well…actually, this isn't the first time I've woken up at an insane hour. This morning though, I think I woke up at about 4 in the morning…"

James raised an eyebrow "O-kaaay and why is that?"

Remus bit his lip, looking slightly ashamed "Welllll…lately, I've been having these dreams. I won't go into detail but…they're about Sirius and when I have them, I can't go back to sleep once I wake up from them…"

James stared blankly at him for a moment but understanding hit him like a ton of bricks and he pulled back with a loud, "GAH!" nearly falling off his bed as he did.

Despite himself, Remus blushed as he hissed "Will you shut up!? You're gonna wake them up!"

James sat up and covered his mouth "Sorry."

Remus huffed and looked away embarrassedly "I knew I shouldn't've told you…"

James shook his head and brought his voice back to a whisper "No wait, come on Rem. I'm sorry. I'm not like, disgusted or anything just…surprised. Aren't you going out with that girl, Seri?"

Remus nodded "Yes…and I really like her but…" he sighed frustratedly "I don't…know. I mean, ugh, I really like her, she's a great girl but…she's not, Sirius…she doesn't smell right!"

James made a face "Smell right? What the hell does that mean? You want her to change her shampoo?"

He shook his head "No, no, it's nothing like that it's just…ugh, I can't explain it! You wouldn't get it, just…never mind…"

James sat in silence as Remus looked down at his books miserably.

"Well…what're you gonna do?" he asked slowly.

Remus looked up "What do you mean?"

"Well if you don't love her, you can't still go out with her right? That's like playing with her emotions and stuff. You'd be leading her on!" James answered, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Remus covered his face with both his hands.

James blinked "What?"

"Nothing just…in my dream, Sirius said something pretty much like that." He mumbled behind them.

James' eyes widened in surprise; "R-really? Huh, I guess great minds think alike…"

Remus sighed and looked up from his hands "But I can't! I mean, have you ever broken up with a person before? It's hard! And Seri's so nice. I really like her and, even if I don't LOVE her, I don't wanna hurt her."

James got off his bed and clapped him on the back "Well, you've got a lot of time to mule it over. For now, why don't you try goin' back to sleep? You look like you're gonna pass out any second."

Remus smiled gratefully "As good as that sounds, I don't wanna risk it. Come on, let's just go to breakfast. The living dead over there can join us when they're good and ready."

James nodded "Kay, let me just take a shower real quick, meet you in the common room!"

Remus, already having taken a shower, sat in their usual area by the fireplace, not that it matter, he was the only one in there. He stared into the fire as the flames seemed to dance around…his thoughts about Seri and Sirius came back to his head.

"…_Do I really have it in me to break up with her? A-and even if I do, that doesn't mean Sirius'll just run into my arms, like some cheesy romance muggle movie! He still…he's not under a potion any more, he doesn't love me! Not like I love him anyway…will breaking up with Seri really do anything for my situation? She's such a nice girl…I definitely want to be her friend, if anything…but will she still want to be friends? Why is Sirius still in my head anyways, why can't I get over him?!_"

He was so wrapped up in his thoughts that whirled like a whirlwind in his head; he didn't notice the cushion of the couch that he sat in lower with the weight of someone else on it.

In fact, it wasn't until the person tapped him on the shoulder that he noticed their presence, which they didn't even do for another 10 minutes or so. Once they had though, he jumped.

"Lily! Oh, don't sneak up on me like that…" he muttered, looking back to the fire.

She smiled "But I didn't 'sneak'. I've been sitting here a while. What's up?"

He sighed, "Oh just…thinking…"

She smirked "Hm, well it must be pretty big, whatever you're thinking about, if your keen sense of smell _failed_ you."

James had offically declared Lily a Marauder a while ago and with the privillage, she learned of Remus 'fur problem'. She didn't have a problem, in fact, she helped him in it as best she could.

He gave her a playful push "Shut it. My smell didn't _fail_ me; I just wasn't paying attention to it…that was a rather cheeky comment coming from _you_ Lily. I see James is wearing off on you a bit."

She sighed dramatically and put a hand over her eyes "Alas! That James Potter is a _bad_ influence. Why, soon, my grades will hit rock bottom and I'll be likely to be thrown out of school!"

Remus grinned "Not unless James did it first!"

They both laughed at this until the boy's dorm opened again.

"And what's so funny in here? Throwin' a party before school?" James asked as he came down the stairs.

Lily giggled "No, we're talking about how bad an influence you are on the innocent, like me."

James grinned and wrapped his arms around her from behind "Well, you can't very well be a Marauders' girl without being somewhat devious!" at that he gave her a soft kiss.

Then turned back to Remus "But how do I know that it weren't you tryin' to steal me lass?" he accused in the best pirate voice he could whip up.

Remus rolled his eyes "Oh yes James, as if my life weren't complicated enough, now I'm trying to steal Lily from you."

James gasped dramatically "Argh! Me knew it! Ah! I must hide me treasure then from the likes of you, yer scurvy dog!" as he said this he picked up Lily, bridal-style and made for the door.

"What? Wait- James! Hahaha, come on, put me down!" she laughed as he went to the door.

Remus chuckled and shook his head, before following the two out of the common room. James had put Lily down once they were out the door, muttering she was a lot heavier then she looked under his breath and earning him a well-aimed smack upside the head and the cold-shoulder which caused him to apologize all the way down to the Great Hall before he was back in her favor.

"Alright James, I'll let it slide, but the mountain of gold better be in my dorm by tonight or we're done for." She said stiffly, though both Remus and James knew better then to fall for it.

James grinned and tickled her sides "I promise!"

"James stop!" she gasped through her laughing.

Remus smiled, Sirius use to do that to…then shook his head at the thought and the three of them sat in their usual spot, waiting for breakfast to magically appear on their plates. And it wasn't long before more people started to fill up the Great Hall.

Everyone always slept in a bit on the weekends.

The food had just appeared on the plates when suddenly two hands placed themselves over Remus' eyes and a voice giggled "Guess who!"

He smiled "Mornin' Seri." he said cheerfully.

Seri gave him a peck on the cheek and sat beside him "Morning."

Whether the Houses were allowed to sit in other house tables they didn't know, but Seri had been doing so for the past 4 weeks and no one had said anything to her about it.

Once she sat next to him, they linked arms. It worked because she was left handed and he was right so both were able to eat just fine as they were.

Breakfast went on as it normal did, with the two couples chatting and laughing with one another and everything was great. Then Peter and Sirius joined them at the table.

As they came up, Remus suddenly unhooked his left arm from Seri's right and used that hand to grab a different plate.

Peter smiled "Mornin' guys." While Sirius just let out a huge yawn.

Remus grinned "You sleep in and you're still sleepy?"

Sirius rubbed his eye "You would be to if McGonagall gave you detention and you didn't get back till late…"

Remus rolled his eyes "Why am I not surprised?"

Seri cleared her throat slightly and nudged him gently "So, we uh, we have a Hogsmede trip today, where'd you want to go?"

Remus shrugged "Anywhere's fine with me. So, what'd you do this time Sirius?"

Just as he was about to answer, however, a girl with dirty blond hair walked up to their table, to Sirius' side rather. She had a wide smile on her face "Um, hello, Sirius…" she said slowly.

Sirius nodded and closed his eyes tiredly "Hey."

She bit her lip (trying to keep in giggles) though she still smiled "Um, I was just…wondering…we're going to Hogsmede today, would you…I mean, if you…er, I was wondering if you…didn't have anyone to go with…would you, like to go…w-with me?"

Again Sirius let out a huge yawn then looked back at her. She held her breath as he did.

A small, tired, smile came to his lips "Sure, why not…s'not like I got anything better-" a yawn interrupted him.

She gasped "You…you-you mean it?! Oh, oh great! Er, I mean, swell. Well then, er, then, you can…m-met me in the common room? We can head out together."

He nodded "Right. See you there…er…"

"Rachel! Rachel Kimbermen."

He nodded once more "Right. See you there Rach."

She seemed to be holding back a squeal as she nodded and was about to run off giddily. As this little scene went on, however, none of them seemed to notice Remus' growing frown.

It was now that he spoke up "Say, you guys wanna come with us?" he gestured at Seri "It could be a double date."

Seri frowned and looked as if she wanted to say something but didn't.

Sirius, on the other hand, smiled "Well sure Rem. That ok with you Rach?"

Rachel blinked, looking somewhat put out "Oh…well…s-sure. The more the merrier right?"

Remus nodded curtly "Right."

"See you then…" Rachel murmured as she left.

Peter sighed dejectedly "Man! Now I'm the only one without somebody!"

"Aw, cheer up Pete, you'll find someone." James said bracingly.

Lily nodded "Yeah. You can hang out with us if you want."

Peter shook his head "Nah, three's a crowd."

"So is four…" Seri muttered lowly under her breath for only Remus to hear.

He glanced at her but said nothing and breakfast went on as usual. Once it was through, however, Remus had to jog to keep up with Seri as she excused herself from the table and went outside.

He followed her until she was out the big doors "Wait! Seri, please wait?" he called after her.

"Why should I? You can do whatever your want but now whenever I choose to leave we have to discuss it?" she said over her shoulder, though not looking back to see him.

Remus frowned "Come on! I don't even know what you're mad about!"

As soon as he said that she abruptly stopped and turned around to face him; he nearly ran right into her when she did, "WHAT?! You don't KNOW?! God, you are dense!" she snarled.

He blinked in surprise, she' never really taken this tone with him before.

"Seri…what's wrong?" he asked softly.

The anger in her voice lessened slightly as she spoke "I can't believe you! You just up and invite Sirius and his girl without even talking to me about it! Did you ever think that maybe I didn't AGREE?! How could you be so selfish?" it now sounded more hurt then angry.

Remus frowned, she just called him selfish! "If you want we can un-invite them! Will that make you happy?"

"No, no! That would be so rude! We can't do that!" she snapped.

His frown deepened "Well then, what can I do to make up for this huh? For being 'selfish'?" In all honesty, he hated to be called selfish of all things. It really didn't sit well with him.

Seri sighed and looked away "I don't know just…next time, would you at least do me a courtesy and TALK to me before you make plans? I was just…I was hoping this could be a little time for us…you know. I mean, I love your friends and all but we haven't had any time alone since we first went out! I'm not asking you to leave your friends or anything; I just thought that maybe today…we could be alone together…"

It was true, near everything they did now and days was with other people.

Even he couldn't think of one time it'd been just them, other then the time they first went out.

As he realized this he sighed, guilt seeping into his voice "You…you're right. I'm sorry. I should've thought about you before speaking…here, come here…" he said as she slowly walked into his open arms.

He hugged her tightly "Really, I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you, ok? We can have all the time in the world together after today, alright?"

She lifted her head from his chest to look him in the eye "Promise?"

He nodded "I promise…"

A smile returned to her face "Ok…it doesn't have to be ALL the time in the world, just a little bit of your time is all I ask…"

He rolled his eyes playfully "You're so hard to please."

Seri giggled "Well, I guess you spoil me to much then…"

Remus chuckled and had an arm around her and together, they walked outside and around the lake.

But, inside his mind, he was really thoughts were somewhat different.

"_You know why you wanted a double date…and it WAS selfish…how can you want to keep an eye on Sirius when you've got a girlfriend right now? You can't have them both!_" a voice said in his head.

Remus sighed inwardly at the thought "_…But I can try…_"

---

After breakfast they had a few hours to themselves before they were to leave to Hogsmeade, in which Seri went off on her own for a bit and Remus brudded on his thoughts. Time seemed to fly and before he knew it Seri came back and all the third years and up came back outside and chatted happily amongst themselves as they filed where the horse-less carriages were waiting. It was a warm day, so they were all dressed casually.

Seri and Remus waited by the gate for Rachel and Sirius.

"So, where do you want to go?" Seri asked cheerfully.

However, Remus didn't seem to hear her as he looked past the crowd.

Seri frowned slightly "Hello? Earth to Remus."

"Huh? Oh, oh yeah, later alright?" he murmured absentmindedly as he leaned on his toes to see past everyone.

Seri scoffed and crossed her arms "No Remus, don't even pretend we _know_ each other or anything, much less the fact that we're going out. I'm perfectly fine with being ignored…" she muttered under her breath.

And still she was unheard by him as he looked amongst the people. A wide smile came to his face as Sirius and Rachel came out from the castle.

Sirius grinned and waved "Hey guys!"

Remus chuckled "Took you long enough."

"Well, some people can't stop insisting they need to 'freshen up'. Right Rach?" he said, putting an arm around her.

She blushed slightly "I just wanted to look nice…"

Sirius smirked "Well, I sorta figured after the fifth time I told you, you looked fine that you'd take my take my word for it."

Rachel giggled slightly and blushed further.

"_Ugh, I think I'm gonna be sick._" Remus thought.

Seri's smile was somewhat forced as she said "Well, now that we're all here and accounted for, lets get a carriage or we may end up walking to Hogsmede."

And so, the four of them got into a carriage and off they went.

It was oddly quiet as they went along, no one really saying anything, just stating observations like 'it's nice out' or 'that's a nice outfit you have'.

Sirius cleared his throat "So uh…d'you guys do that essay for Sune?"

"I did, considering our little bet." Remus said in jokingly angry voice.

Sirius grinned "Oh yeah! Heh, well, you brought it upon yourself Rem, I never lose a bet!"

"Yep, except for the ones you make with James which usually end up making you do embarrassing things. Like the time you had to change your hair to a neon puke green." Remus said smugly.

Rachel smiled "Ahh, so that was the reason behind that. Heh, you had the whole house laughing for weeks!"

Remus nodded and went on with "Or that time when you bet James you could beat him in a race and you had to speak backwards all day when you lost, even to teachers!"

Sirius laughed "I got 5 detentions for that one!"

As they started talking about different bets with funny results, Rachel laughed and said a few comments here and there. It seemed she at least was enjoying herself. Seri, however, was not.

She stared out the window of the carriage with a thoughtful look on her face. Though she had many opportunities to speak with and laugh with them, she was silent. Eventually they carriages came up to Hogsmede and all of the students walked out of their carriages and into the little village square before going out on their own.

Seri smiled somewhat forced as she said "So, what are we going to do first?"

Rachel smiled widely and linked arms with Sirius "Oh, let's go to HoneyDukes! I hear they've got these new heart lollipops that show the name of your crush when you like them!"

Seri frowned as she felt Remus tense a bit next to her.

"I was wanting to go to Three Broomsticks. Get a few butterbeers to start the day, considering how long it feels like sense I've had one." Sirius said, though didn't seem to really care either way.

Remus smiled "Yeah, that sounds good."

"Actually, I agree with Rachel. I want to go to HoneyDukes." Seri said suddenly, causing Remus to look at her.

Sirius shrugged "Whatever, it's up to you Rem."

She nodded solemnly and spoke softly "Yes Remus, it's your choice…where you want to be…"

Remus blinked in surprise at the tone of her voice, she sounded somewhat pleading, if not despairing and the way she looked at him suggested she was asking more then just the question he heard. She stared at him with wide, hopeful eyes.

"Er…well…HoneyDukes sounds good, but we can always go after we get a butterbeer right?" he said slowly.

Seri stared at him for a moment then backed away and looked at the ground "Oh…ok. Let's go then…" and walked ahead of them to the pub.

All three of them, Sirius, Remus and Rachel, exchanged confused looks before slowly following after. Seri was up at the bar, making the order with Madam Rosmerta so the rest decided to get a table.

Seri stayed at the bar for a while, even after Rosmerta had left to get their drinks, she seemed a bit down.

"Hey, she ok?" Sirius hissed, though there was no need, it wasn't like she could hear them from across the room.

Remus shrugged "I'm not sure. I mean, we had a fight earlier but I thought we settled that…"

"Maybe she's still thinking about it. OH! Why don't you get her a gift while we're waiting for the drinks? Sirius and I can cover for you while you're gone." Rachel said helpfully.

Sirius grinned and put an arm around her "Great idea Rach! Heh, idn't she great?"

An annoyed look passed Remus face as he tapped the table in an impatient manner "Yes, lovely."

"_Do you have to make it so obvious that you're jealous?_" the evil little voice mocked in his head.

He shook his head of the thought and stood up "Yeah, that might work…and you guys'll cover for me?"

"Course! Now go on before she sees you leave." Sirius said.

Remus nodded and raced out the door.

"_Ok, if I was a girl, what would I want to get after I'd just had a fight with my boyfriend?_" he thought as he walked around the square.

"_Well, what do girls like? Chocolates, flowers, puppies…expensive jewelry._"

"_No, Seri said she's not a jewelry type and she's allergic to just about everything! Flowers, animals and chocolates are out. Think! What's Seri like, what would she want?_" he thought.

"_A heart felt apology and for you to stop chasing after Sirius._"

He frowned and looked up as if to see the face of the taunting voice in his head "Oh shut up." and marched into the closest shop to him.

It was a bookshop.

He blinked in surprise "…Convenient…" and walked around the aisles, looking though the different things.

"_Well, Seri does like reading…what's more up her alley…_" he thought as he walked around.

The books were split into sections. House-hold spells, Healer spells, Quidditch books, Prank spells, Magical creature care-books. All sorts of different books! He just couldn't tell which Seri would like the most.

Then he spotted a small black and red book. It was mostly about dangerous magical creatures, mostly vampires. Remus smiled as he flipped through it. It even mentioned werewolves a bit…yeah. Seri did think most dangerous things were fascinating…sure, why not.

He grabbed the book and put 5 sickels on the counter. Once he had the book in hand he quickly made his way back to the Three Broomsticks. Before entering, however, he peeked in the window to make sure Seri wasn't at the table just yet.

He smiled when he saw she was still at the bar, talking to Madam Rosmerta it would seem, though at their table Sirius and Rachel had their drinks.

"Alright, I'll walk in and…I'll do like she did this morning. I'll put my hand over her eyes and say 'guess who' and then…I'll show her the book. She'll love it and then, no more sulking. Right, that'll work." He murmured to himself and walked back inside.

HOWEVER...just as he came in, he glanced at the table out of the corner of his eye. Rachel was batting her eyes as she spoke to Sirius. He couldn't hear what she was saying, but his brain filled in the rest as he noticed her leaning closer to him. His blood began to boil and only did more as Sirius leaned in as well…and after that point, he wasn't to sure what had happen, it was all so fast. But, it was something like this: He went around the back (dropping the book as some point) so the two of them couldn't see him and to get a better view of the table. Once he had he pulled out his wand and aimed at Rachel's stool. He waited till just the right moment…right as Sirius and Rachel's faces were mere inches apart then **BAM!**

His spell hit the stool and it collapsed underneath her and as expected she grabbed the table to keep from falling but with another spell it too fell and both hers and Sirius' tankers butterbeers fell on her as she hit the floor.

Remus smirked in satisfaction and was about to turn around to give Seri her book when he realized he didn't have it. A panic crossed his features as he looked around for it and that panic was only heightened when he saw it was by the door. He scrambled to his feet and made his way to the door but it was far too late. The door opened and a group of trolls trampled all over the book.

Remus cringed as he saw their huge feet crush the gift…once they'd left the book was completely split and all the pages were wrinkled. He sighed and slowly glanced at the bar where, to his surprised, Seri was no longer.

He looked around and even called her name out as he went around, but she wasn't there.

Sirius was helping Rachel to her feet as Madam Rosmerta gathered up the broken tankers.

"Guys, have you seen Seri? She's gone." Remus asked, stifling a laugh at the miserable look on Rachel's face, thought he felt guilty for it once he did.

Sirius shook his head "No. She was at the bar a moment ago…"

"Oh, you mean that small black haired girl?" Rosmerta asked, obviously overhearing them. She tutted and shook her head "Poor dear. She was really upset. Says she has an unloyal boyfriend."

At this both Sirius and Rachel looked at Remus in surprise.

Remus frowned as guilt struck his heart "Unloyal?"

"Yes, she says he's obviously got his eyes on someone else and it tears her up that he's still with her, even though they both know she's not who he wants…she feels like he's toying with her, she almost broke into tears as she told me…poor thing…" she muttered, taking the broken tankers and walking back to the bar.

It was deadly silent after that.

Sirius and Rachel both looked at Remus with peculiar looks, Rachel looking more angry then anything else while Remus just stood there, letting Madam Rosmerta's words sink in.

"…_Unloyal?_" the word stung worse then poison and it kept repeating itself in his head.

"_Well, you HAVE been dreaming of Sirius, talking to him more then her, giving him more of your time then her…I'd say it's pretty obvious._" The evil little voice said, though, Remus knew it was right.

He bit his lip and walked out of the Three Broomsticks in search for Seri, but not finding her anywhere.

The trip ended and they all headed back to Hogwarts though Remus rode alone in his carriage, one thought burning his head, making him feel overwhelming guilt.

"…_I'm unloyal…_"

---

Once back at Hogwarts Remus didn't join the rest as they went back inside. Instead, he walked around the grounds, just thinking. He wanted to clear his head, get his thoughts straight…he didn't expect to run into anyone, much less the one who was taking up all his thoughts…

Seri sat at the far end of the lake, moodily throwing stones into the lake, just as she was when Sirius first met her, though now, her eyes were red and she sniffled, she'd obviously been crying for some time.

Remus felt the guilt raise as he walked towards her, what could he say to her after today?

His heart pounded in his ears as he drew closer.

Would she forgive him, be angry? Hate him?

What if she didn't even give him a chance to explain, or if she just started to sob hysterically and then ran away?

What if-

Remus was right next to her now and Seri didn't look up, she didn't even seem to notice his presence.

For a while there was silence, in which Remus remained standing and Seri continued to toss stones in the water. Remus stared at her in somewhat surprise but couldn't bring his stupid mouth to form words; no thoughts were processing, what could he say?!

"…Hi…" he said softly.

At this Seri looked up. Her eyes were still red and she looked miserable, but a sad little smile somehow made its way to her face as she whispered "Hi." back.

"_Well, she's not screaming, I think that's a good sign…_" he thought.

He took her speech as an invitation to sit down. He sat next to her and Seri didn't even move. Once he was seated she went back to tossing stones. Neither said anything and the stony silence returned. She kept her gaze on the lake as she threw her stones and Remus stayed completely silent. The wind blew at there backs, making her hair cover her face slightly…

…Silence…

"So, which spell did you use to break Rachel's stool?" she asked as offhandedly as she could manage.

Remus looked at her in alarm but she did not look back at him as she said "I saw you from the bar, you were heading towards me but stopped to destroy Sirius' date, remember? You don't have to answer me though, I'm just curious."

His features relaxed and he to looked at the lake "..._Demolisatin_…how long have you known?"

Seri shrugged "A while I guess. I noticed that whenever he came around you'd let go of my hand, even avoid looking at me at times…as if you felt guilty for being with someone else…also, you never...NEVER kissed me...I always kissed you..."

Remus looked away "...I see…"

"_Told ya you were to obvious!_"

The wind was the only sound for a while.

"…So…this is it?" Remus asked slowly.

For the first time since she said 'hi' Seri looked at him, a few tears running down her face "…Yeah…"

Remus nodded "Right…"

Seri sniffled and looked away again.

Remus bit his lip as guilt once more became the only thing he could feel "Seri I'm sorry. I REALLY am…I shouldn't have used you, I was just trying to get Sirius out of my head-"

"But it didn't work. because he's who you want. Heh, no matter…how much I look like him…I'm not." She said softly.

Remus nodded silently and looked away.

Seri sighed "You know, as my first boyfriend, I'll always remember you…even if this didn't work out; I still feel for you…can we at least be friends?"

Remus looked up to see her looking right at him once more.

A smile found its way to his face as he nodded "I'd like that very much Seri…you're a great person, a real friend. No, don't give me that look, you really are a-and I like you-!"

"But you don't love me." She said, a sad smile still gracing her face.

Remus sighed and ran a hand through his hair "…yeah…"

"Not like you do Sirius anyway." She said again.

Remus felt his face heat up a bit and looked at the ground.

Seri giggled "See? That's what I wonder. He's right there, why don't you just ask him out?"

"After that whole ordeal with the potion I'm surprised he even TALKS to me. If I did, he might assume I 'drugged him' on purpose…he might hate me for it…" Remus said softly, admitting it for the first time aloud.

There were many reasons why he didn't try to talk to Sirius about it, but this was the main one, though he never voiced it, he didn't want to lose Sirius' friendship.

Seri shrugged "Well, maybe he won't."

"But what if he does?"

"Well then YOU'D be the one making assumptions then wouldn't you?"

Remus made a face and looked at her.

She smiled and he laughed "And that's what I like about you so much!"

They both laughed a bit then stood up.

"Well, it's getting late, we better go back inside now." Remus said as they walked back to the castle.

Seri nodded "Yeah."

They came back to the front doors of the castle and stopped. The silence returned and they didn't meet each other's eyes…the wind blew and a chill was beginning to come.

"…So this is really it then…" Remus muttered for the second time.

Seri nodded "Yeah…"

Slowly they both looked up at one another. Seri's eyes had once more filled with tears as she looked up at him. He smiled sadly and opened his arms. Seri bit her lip and hesitated a moment before going into his open arms, hugging him tightly. Remus closed his eyes and returned the embrace.

"I really **am** sorry." He whispered, well aware that the fronts of his robes were getting wet.

Seri sniffled and buried her face in his chest as she cried, occasionally making a gasping sound as she got her breath.

They stood there for a while like that, with the wind blowing at their backs.

---

James, Peter and Sirius were all wide-awake. Sirius had of course told them everything and they were all eagerly waiting for the door to open. None of them spoke, just started at the door.

Silence

Then, the doorknob jiggled a little bit.

The three of them made to stand up…

Remus opened the door and was taken completely by surprised when suddenly his friends simultaneously burst out into questions.

"Did you really cheat on her-"

"I thought you guys were doing good together-"

"Who was it with? Why?"

"How could you do that to her?!"

"Was that what the fight you had this morning was about?"

"Are you guys still together now? After all that I mean-"

"Guys, guys! Calm down…you're almost as bad as those stupid gossipers." He muttered, slipping past them and to his bed.

There was a pause for a moment as Remus took off his shoes and laid back on his bed.

He sighed and without looking at any of them said "Seri broke up with me."

Again there was a pause.

"…Are you ok?" Sirius asked, with a surprising amount of concern.

Remus still didn't get up. He stared at the ceiling, with the most peculiar feeling.

Actually, he was sort of…relieved. Guilty, for being the cause of it coming down to that, but relieved, because at least it wasn't him that did the break-up part! He was essentially happy, now that he didn't have the weight of it on his shoulders and even gladder that Seri was still his friend after it.

He shrugged "I guess. I mean, we're still friends and all but…"

Another hush moment…

"…So…did you, you know…cheat on her then?" Peter asked cautiously.

Remus couldn't help a small smile "Not exactly…I wasn't with anyone else _physically_ but, she could tell. As much as I like her, she's just…not my type. I guess, something like that. She could tell I wasn't truly interested in that sort of relationship with her."

At that he snuck a quick glance at James who nodded in understanding.

"Gee, that's to bad Rem…" James said slowly.

Remus sighed and sat up "Well, that's just how it goes sometimes…"

"You need to be alone?" Peter asked kindly.

Remus shook his head "Nah, I'm fine."

Sirius looked down at his feet with remorse "Wow…and here you've been doin' all my work for me. I was the one who lost the bet after all."

Remus chuckled "Well then, I guess you'll have to save up your money to get me those frogs."

Sirius didn't return the look, in fact, he looked really guilty.

Remus frowned slightly "What's wrong?"

He shook his head "Nothin'. Well, we should probably all go to bed now."

Peter and James shared Remus' confusion but they all agreed to go to bed. When the candles were put out however, Remus stayed awake and stared at Sirius' bed, where Sirius rolled over on his side so his back was facing them all.

The look on Sirius face before bothered him and he found he was restless as he lay in his bed. What could he be feeling guilty about? Surely it wasn't merely over a stupid bet…but what else could it be?

* * *

End A/N: Woot! Ok, that's all I've got for now. Hope that was enough to get a few critics off my back. Again, grammer's not my strong suit so back off! Not everyone's got spell/grammer check programs on their computers so give me a break. Thanks for readin' guys, don't forget to review! Again, my next update may take awhile, sorries! 


	23. Chapter 23

Accidents happen

A/N: Hey out there reading public! MERRY VALENTINE'S DAY EVERYBODY!!! Alright, now that we've got that out of the way, for today's chapter, I've got a little surprise for you guys. Well, I think I've picked on Remus enough for a while so this chapter will deal mostly with Sirius, enjoy!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam, Seri and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, their mine.

**Chapter 23**

"_Great, just great! Once again, I'm made the liar! Poor Seri, hope she's holding out ok…_" Sirius thought sullenly as he lay in his bed.

You see, after Seri and Remus got together, she was kind of nervous considering she'd never been anyone's girlfriend before. She didn't want to screw it up and because of her lack of friends (her other so-called 'friends' were more like acquaintances really, none really said anything other then the occasional class room chatter or a small 'hi' in the hallways so she just didn't feel right talking to any of them about her problems), she had no one to talk to about it how she felt or ask advice from.

And then, she remembered it was Sirius who had set them up to begin with so, naturally, she went to him for help.

She'd talk to Sirius about how things were going and asked for help that Sirius was glad to give. It wasn't long before they'd become pretty close friends. Sirius had actually been thinking of her as the long-lost twin sister he never had, considering their appearances, and starting looking out for her like a brother would.

Whenever she'd ask for help she always looked so sad, but when Sirius gave her a few tips she'd always thank him, for everything! The advice, setting them up and said things like 'I can never say thank you enough!'

What would she say to him now?

He groaned and closed his eyes "_Damn…_"

Remus didn't seem effected by it so he wasn't all to concerned about him, but…Seri told him the main reason she never had a boyfriend before was because she was afraid of getting hurt, on the inside. When she told him this, Sirius whole-heartedly assured her that Remus would never do anything to hurt her…that he'd be the best boyfriend she'd ever have…and now, he found out she didn't even like her to start with! Not like a boyfriend would anyway.

He frowned angrily. He wanted to hit Remus for it but he didn't. It's not like people can control who they do and don't like, it's not really his fault…but still…he broke Seri's heart after he'd just told her that very day Remus would NEVER hurt her…that made him a liar!

He turned over on his back and stared at the ceiling "_This is gonna be a looooong night._"

---

How he'd gotten to sleep even he didn't know, but he was up now. He stretched his hands over his head and let out a yawn. He looked around to find the room was empty.

"(Sigh) Over-slept again…" he muttered as he got out of bed.

He tiredly got his cloths from his trunk and headed off to the showers "_Hope Ronts doesn't make us do too much first thing…_" he thought as he went. His new schedule had Potions as his first class of the day.

He frowned slightly "Potions…"

It all started there didn't it? He still sat in the same seat, even if that's were the accident happened. His memory was coming back fairly well, he remember more and more every other day.

Sometimes the memory would come back in huge bursts, other times it'd be just a quick flash of memory. Sometime it took looking at something to trigger his remembrance, other times it'd just be random. But when he thought about it, it was all a bit random. None of it came back in any specific order, in fact, according to James; a lot of it was out of order. He remembered being an Animagus before he remember the nicknames they'd given each other. He didn't really remember to much of his time with Remus, which was somewhat strange, but he didn't question it.

One thing he did remember clearly; was being left out of a ton of conversations.

"_Conversations that now make sense._" he added as he went through the morning routine as if on automatic, walking to the shower and getting in his stall.

As the water warmed though, he glanced at the ground for the first time since he'd woken up and was surprised to see his that his toes were adroitly changing colors.

He couldn't help snickering though he tried to sound angry as he said "A man can't oversleep without having his feet attacked?" his wand was still upstairs so he'd have to take the charm off once he was up there.

The water temp was good so he reached for the shampoo and started rubbing it in.

He closed his eyes as his thoughts went back to the matter he was thinking about before, his remembrance.

There was one memory that had just come up a few days ago that made him curious. He couldn't really understand it.

It was when Remus 'broke up' with him.

Remus had said: _"Sirius, please…remember this, no matter what…I love you I really mean it, I've never loved anyone like I do you. I never thought I'd meet anyone I love this much…you mean so much to me, I don't want to lose you so…ugh, I…god, I love you-" _and that's were it stopped.

Sirius opened his eyes.

He could even remember the pained look in his face as he said it, the sorrowful tone with which he spoke.

"James said it was an act…." he murmured as he washed his hair.

Some act. Remus was even better then he thought but, why be so convincing about it? It's not like anyone else was there, why try so hard to make it look real?

Sirius had a few guess…

"_Maybe he thought there was. Maybe he'd told someone else to be there so they could see that…no wait, that doesn't make sense, than he would've just done it right in the Great Hall…_"

Though he had guesses, none of them made much sense…except for one.

"…_What if it wasn't an act?_"

He shook his head of the thought "No. Remus knew! He…he's not dumb, he wouldn't fall for someone under a love potion…"

"_Would he?_"

Sirius frowned "Oh come on! Course he wouldn't! Even still, I don't like him that way…"

"_Right?_"

He stopped rinsing his hair for a moment…Gee, he never really thought of it before…it's not exactly something he would think about on a daily bases or anything. Soul-searching wasn't really something he did often.

Well, because of all the attention he got from girls, he always just assumed he was straight and then there was his girlfriend, Gloria.

"_But I broke up with her because she thought Remus was dangerous and told me it was either her or him…_"

At that his eyes widened, realizing for the first time what that meant.

"Ho-ly crap…"

In that sense, he'd chosen Remus over the only girl he'd ever been serious (no pun intend!) about.

"No, no, no, no, no! I chose **my friends** over her!"

"_She didn't have a problem with James and Pete, it was just Remus! So yeah, you did! You chose Remus over the only girl that ever really stuck out!_"

"But they wouldn't have let me hung out with them if I said I could be friends with Remus right?!"

"_How do you know that?_"

"I…I…I don't…exactly, know…"

"_Ah-ha!_"

"But that doesn't prove anything!"

"_Yes it does! You subconsciously-_"

"No, no, no, that's can't be right! I'm not gay!" and it was true, there were plenty of girls at school he found physically attractive…just their personalities never really matched their good looks so he didn't bother.

"_Maybe I'm bi._"

"Bi?"

He stopped all movement for a moment.

Did he think any _guys_ were attractive to? Wow, he'd never thought to even **wonder** about it…

He paused, racking his brain to think.

"Well, there was that one guy who I thought was a chick in 3 year…" he murmured as he stood under the running water.

"_Anyone else?_"

He closed his eyes tightly and rattled his brain, thinking of anyone who seemed, even slightly attractive.

"_That guy in Charms has a nice smile…Remus has a nice smile too, whenever he does…he's moderately handsome I guess…_"

The bang on his stall door stopped his thought process.

It was accompanied by a voice yelling "HEY! PICK UP THE PACE IN THERE!"

Sirius frowned and shut off the water "Keep yer towel on, jerk!" he grabbed his towel and roughly pushed the stall open and went past the impatient guy waiting.

"_Geez! 3 other stalls and he insists on using mine!_" he thought annoyedly as he gathered his cloths.

Still, he was somewhat glad that guy had interrupted his thoughts; they were getting kinda weird…to weird for his taste. Anyways, that wasn't important, what mattered now was to go find Seri and see how she was holding up.

"_Still…I think Remus is moderately handsome?_"

He shook his head at the thought "Stay focused! We'll figure this out AFTER consoling Seri..."

---

At the Gryffindor breakfast table, Lily, James and Peter sat. Eating breakfast and talking casually.

"-But I mean, if she dumps your best friend, doesn't that mean she's automatically off-limits?" Peter said sadly.

Lily shook her head "Not necessarily. I mean, if your friend still has an attachment for her then yeah, that's evil."

James nodded "Yeah but Remus didn't seem too torn up about it though."

"Of course, he could have just been holding the pain in because you guys were there." Lily murmured.

James couldn't suppress a smirk as he said "Oh, I doubt that's the case."

Peter sighed "But how can I be sure?"

Lily smiled "Well, just ask Remus if it's ok, if it bothers him then just drop it."

James gave her a look "What? Ask _permission_?"

Lily frowned "**No**, ask if it **bothers** him."

"That's practically the same thing!" James exclaimed.

Lily's frown deepened "Oh?"

"Well if it bothers him then the answer's no!"

"It's not asking permission, it's being considerate of your friend's feelings!"

"Asking permission."

"It is not!"

"Asking permission!"

"IS NOT!!"

Peter groaned, rolled his eyes and stared down at his cinnamon bun, those two...a lot of people thought it was cute (until it got bigger that is), but he found it rather annoying when they did so right when he needed help.

Every couple has their little spats, these two were no different, and they always made up before the day was through anyway, so it's not like it mattered.

But back to Peter.

He sighed and moodily poked his cinnamon bun "What's the point? She'd probably say no anyways..."

"Who'd say no to what?"

He gasped and looked up "Oh! Er, uh, h-hi Seri..."

Seri smiled "Hey. Mind if I sit here still? I mean, I know Remus and I aren't going out anymore, but you guys are the only real friends I actually have."

It was true. When she used to sit at the Ravenclaw table she always sat alone on the far off corner of the table. She'd grown use to the company of the Gryffindors and if the teachers didn't mind before, why would the mind now?

Peter stared at her for a moment, as if forgetting what she'd just asked before suddenly jumping up and scooting down so she could sit at the end of the table, knocking over a few jugs of milk and juice as he did.

He blushed deeply "Sorry, I-"

Seri smiled and shook her head "Don't worry, I've got it." as she said this she pulled out her wand and used a non-verbal spell to put the liquids back in their jugs.

Peter gapped at her "Y-you've got non-verbals down already?!"

She shrugged "Well, I am a Ravenclaw. Oh, oops! I put them in the wrong pitchers!"

At that she laughed, and Peter hesitantly laughed with her.

"Hey!"

Peter stopped laugh and a look of panic over-came his features, his face going a bit pale. He didn't ask Remus, was he mad? What if he tried to kill him!?

"You guys starting a party without me?" Sirius said in a mock angry voice as he came over.

Peter sighed, releasing the breath he didn't realize he'd been holding.

Seri rolled her eyes, but smiled "Not everything revolves around you, Casanova."

Sirius grinned and ruffled her hair a bit before sitting down "Ah come on, of course it does!"

Seri scoffed and sat down as well, only next to Peter so she and Sirius were right across from each other.

Peter looked at the two of them then hung his head low.

Damn.

Out of luck again.

If Sirius liked her, then there was no chance in hell she'd choose him.

Sigh that's the story of his life.

Back to the others, Lily and James' fight was starting to escalate. They'd been fighting this whole time, but it was only now that Sirius and Seri's attentions were drawn to it.

"Why can't you just admit it when I'm right?!" James said heatedly.

"Because you're not, that's why! And I hate that you always assume you are!" she shouted.

"I don't assume! I AM right!"

Their voices were getting a bit louder with ever accusation.

"I see our lovebirds are having a great morning!" Sirius said loudly to Seri, who barely caught it.

She nodded "No kidding!"

Lily slammed her hand on the table "FINE! You're right, as always, HAPPY?!"

James frowned "No! I know you're just saying that!"

"You're right, I am!" as she said this she stood up and grabbed her book bag.

He frowned "Where are you going?!"

"Away from you!" and she swung her bag over her shoulder, hitting James in the side of the head.

"OW!! THAT HURT!"

Lily glanced back "Well maybe if you'd shrink that head of yours it wouldn't be so easy to hit!" and she marched through the doors, uncaring if it slammed behind her or not.

James growled and stabbed his eggs without mercy.

Sirius sighed mockingly "I just love those lovers-quarrels..."

Seri chuckled "So cute."

"Aw shut up, both of ya." James muttered angrily.

It was obvious his anger was dying down and once it had, guilt would take its place and along with guilt would come sorrow and he'd want nothing more then to apologize to Lily 50 times over.

They'd all grown use to the routine, considering it happened at least once every other week.

There were two kinds of fights with these two, the dangerous, explosive ones (the one that just happened) that usually got resolved within a 3 day span of time and cute little fights, in which no ones feelings got hurt and they were just arguing for the sake of arguing and both laughed after they were through.

Sirius raised a defensive hand at James' anger "Kay, just tryin' to brighten the mood."

They all sat in silence for a moment and continued eating, except James, who stared down at his mangled eggs.

It was a good 15 minutes before he looked up "I'm SO stupid..."

"Run to her man, run." Sirius said, though he said it in a serious tone, that's what made Seri and Peter stifle laughter.

James however, didn't find it at all humorous but rather another reason for him to get up and go after Lily. So he did. He grabbed his bag from under the table and jogged out the door.

Sirius chuckled "Bless him. If he makes up with her before first hour then it'll be the new record."

"I dunno. Lily can be just as stubborn as James when she's mad. More so even." Peter said.

Sirius grinned "I'm takin' all bets! I bet 7 sickles Lily doesn't give in until 3 hour."

Seri rolled her eyes "Sirius..."

"Come on, it's just wholesome fun! S'not hurting anyone!"

She shook her head and went back to eating.

As she finished her muffin though, she asked "Hey, where's Remus?"

Sirius shrugged "Got me. I just woke up a while ago."

"He's in the library. He said he had something important to look up." Peter said, in a suddenly more sorrowful tone.

In his mind, if she was still thinking about Remus, then she was still probably hung up about him.

"_So much for catching her on the re-bound..._"

Seri frowned "Why's that sad?"

Peter looked up "Hm?"

"Well, you looked all sad when you said it. What's sad about that?" Seri repeated.

Peter shook his head "It's nothing. Uh, I'm gonna go now. Get to class early. See you guys later." he said all this rather quickly as he grabbed his things and stood up.

Both Sirius and Seri were confused, but said goodbye as he left.

Now it was just the two of them, the moment Sirius was waiting for. He didn't want to bring up her pain with everyone around. In fact...

He stood up "Come on, lets go walk around the lake before class start."

Seri smiled and nodded "Kay."

And both made their way out of the Great Hall, down the corridor and outside, neither saying a word as they went. It wasn't until they were outside that Sirius opened his mouth, but Seri beat him to the punch.

"I'm fine. I mean, I'm a little hurt, but I'm fine…can't you just let me pretend to be happy without analyzing it?" she said softly.

Sirius frowned "I just want to make sure you're ok. You are then, I mean, you sure you're ok?"

She sighed and closed her eyes "Well, I can't honestly say I'm happy about how it turned out but, we're still friends and I'm glad for that."

"I just don't get it...why would he do this? Did he tell you?"

Seri kept her eyes closed as they continued their walk "…Yes and no. I sorta figured it out on my own and…then he just confirmed it…"

Sirius frowned "Hm…this is…ugh, I'm so sorry. I told you he wouldn't do this, he made me a liar!"

A sad smile came to her face "Oh, don't beat yourself up about it…it's, probably for the better anyway…"

"Yeah but still! Seri, I'm so sorry. I wish that…that there was something I could do-"

"Well you can't do anything about it so can we just drop it?!" she shouted, in a suddenly angry tone.

Sirius looked down at her in slight surprise.

Though she'd been trying her hardest to hold them back, a few stray tears rolled down her face and she looked away from him, as if ashamed.

Sirius bit his lip. What he was about to do was a very rare occurrence but…he felt guilty.

Hesitantly, he put his arms around her in a hug "I'm sorry. I'm just…it was stupid of me to bring it up. You're probably hurting enough as it is…"

She sniffled and attempted to wipe her eyes "No, no…I'm sorry. I shouldn't have snapped at you…I just…"

He smiled and tightened his grip "It's ok, I deserved it…"

For a moment they stood like that but then Seri broke away from his grasp and continued the walking pace they'd started. Sirius followed.

Seri tried her hardest to smile but her face didn't listen "I mean, at least we're still friends right?"

Sirius nodded "Yeah…"

They walked in silence for a moment.

Slowly, Seri smiled "You know, I'm an only child…I've never really had anyone there to, look out for me…help me out and…well, just give me hugs when I need them, like you do…"

Sirius looked up at the sky "Yeah well…just don't tell anyone about those. I have to keep my macho-manly image! And manly-men do NOT hug."

Seri scoffed and gave him a playful shove "Oh get _over_ yourself!"

Sirius laughed and messed up her hair "I'm just messin' with ya!" he paused for a moment then added "I agree with you though. I may not be an only child, but I might as well have been. You're more of a younger sibling to me then my idiot brother was…is for that matter."

Seri frowned slightly "I still can't see why you can't just come to terms with him. He's family-"

Sirius scoffed "Oh please, I have no family. My dear old mummy said it herself when I left." he said this with a scowl of detest. "But enough about those idiots, they don't matter. What about you, you sure you'll be alright?" he said in a much gentler tone.

Seri sighed almost annoyedly "I told you I'm fine, no need to be so protective." But a smile came to her face "I am grateful for it though, thanks…_brother_." she said in a mocking tone.

He grinned "Aw, you're very welcome littl' _sis_. Come ask for help any time, right?"

She nodded with a laugh "Right."

They laughed as they walked along, glad to have that grim cloud behind them.

Still, Sirius couldn't help but wonder…

"…So…Remus told you it was true then?" he asked slowly, not wanted to provoke anger.

Seri sighed "Yes, I know who he was really interested in."

Sirius blinked "Oh, um, ok…" he looked like he wanted to say more but couldn't come up with the words to speak.

A sly grin came to Seri's face "But, I won't tell you!"

"What? Why?"

Seri's grin widened "Wellllll, why do you want to know?"

Sirius looked away "Well, I er…I just, I'm curious to know that's all!"

Seri grinned further still and shook her head "Curiosity killed the cat, my dear brother."

Sirius groaned "Oh fine, keep your secrets then!"

Seri laughed at the sour look on Sirius face "Ok, I will."

Sirius huffed as they walked along, Seri still laughing. But as they did, he couldn't help but wonder about who Remus would want over Seri…wait, why did he care?

"_I don't! I mean...I'm just curious to know..._"

"_Is that really all?_"

"_Yes, it is!_"

"_You were just questioning your own sexuality this morning! And, you said Remus was __**handsome**_"

"_SO?! That doesn't mean anything!_"

"_Doesn't it?_"

"_Well who asked you?! Even if it does mean something, it's not like there's anyone I can ask about it...I mean, if I talk to James about it, what if he thinks I like him or something?! No, I can't talk about this with anyone..._"

"_Uh, hello!? Look right next to you!_"

"_What?! I can't talk to Seri about __**that**_"

"_Why not? She talks to you about everything, think of it as returning the favor!_"

"_Well yeah, but we talk about her problems, not her sexuality! No, it'd be to awkward!_"

"_It's only be awkward if you MADE it awkward!_"

"_But-_"

"Sirius, you ok?" Seri asked suddenly, pulling him off his train of thought.

"Hm? Oh er…y-yeah, I'm fine I…I just was think about…something…" he paused for a minute, as if he wondered if he could tell her then slowly took a deep breath and began "…er…Seri, you…I-I mean…er…have you er…ever wondered about your…(ahem), s-sexual preferences?" he felt embarrassment rush to his face and mentally smacked himself for putting it so stupidly.

Seri however smiled "Yeah. I did in about 4th or 5th year. In all honesty, I think everyone does at some point so it's not really all that weird, most people are just to shy or scared to confront it. I hear suppressing it can lead to bigger problems in life like gender-confusion and all sorts of other things."

Sirius blinked "…Ok…a simple yes or no would've done but…"

She giggled "Sorry, I tend to over-speak sometimes. Why? Were you doing some wondering yourself?"

"Well kinda…I mean, I was thinking about my memories. Ronts said they'd come back slowly but…hmm…it was, this one memory that just…hm…I dunno. It almost seemed like he wasn't acting…" Sirius murmured.

Seri suddenly looked down sadly "…Did you ever think that maybe he wasn't?"

"What? No, he had to be! He'd have told me if he wasn't right?"

"Not if he were afraid it'd ruin your friendship. Would it have?"

Sirius frowned at that "Hell yeah it would! He'd just taken advantage of me then didn't he, if he was serious about it that is. In all honesty, I'd be more then peeved about it, I wasn't all there and I hate being used and if he did then I…I…I don't know what I do…but he didn't! That's the point right?"

Seri kept her eyes on the ground "…Didn't he…the point of it all…"

He frowned "What?"

She shook her head "It's nothing. Anyways, you can't just make that assumption. I mean, you said yourself you weren't all there. YOU might have provoked it, hell, you might have done something on your own."

Sirius paused; he hadn't thought of that…what if he did something?

If Remus wasn't joking, what if it was partial his fault? He'd have…no…but…then again…

Sirius frowned "But even…even if I did something, he should have known better, should've been more responsible about it! He should've remembered that it wasn't me talking! And that…it was fake!"

Seri sighed "You can't always help it though…once your heart loves someone, even if you know it's wrong or if they don't love you back, you can't stop it. Believe me, if you could, I'd have stopped feeling awful yesterday…"

Sirius looked down at her.

Once more, silence feel between them, each having their own thoughts.

As always, Seri had a point…Sirius frowned "_But I still don't think it's right…no, I'm sure of it. It was just an act and I'm being stupid for think it anything else!_"

"_Even if that was an act, what's to say your feelings haven't changed now?_"

"_Would you just-_"

"_You don't even know your own sexuality! How can you say you don't possibly have feelings for R-_"

"_WOULD YOU JUST SHUT UP?!? I'll figure this all out but…how…?_"

Sirius groaned and felt like throwing himself in the lake "What a mess…"

"Tell me about it…" Seri muttered.

Again, neither spoke as they walked along and they didn't speak until they remembered, they were in school.

"We better get to class or else we'll be late." Sirius said in a surprisingly soft voice.

Seri nodded "Yeah…"

Both made their way back to the doors and said their goodbyes as they went to their separate classes.

As Ronts went on about whatever it was she was talking about, Sirius' thought were all he could focus on.

"_The amazing, handsome Sirius Black…gay?_"

"_Bi. That blond has a nice rack._"

"_True……but I don't know…I think…ugh, what do I think?_"

"_Got me, I'm just your conscience._"

Sirius ran both hands through his hair "I reiterate…WHAT- A- MESS…"

---

End A/N: Ok! Sorry I took so long! Whew, I'm workin' overtime now, and hope to have the next one up soon (if I can find the time!)! Hope you like it thus far, stick around, it's about to get even more interesting!


	24. Chapter 24

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Well! I can see some of you are a bit fickle. I can't update everyday anymore and suddenly you all lose interest. I'm mad at you all now, Hmph!…hehehe, hahaha, j/k! I kid, I kid! Nah, I'm not mad at anyone. Actually, I suppose it's for the better really, all the reviews at once were starting to give me a bit of an ego. Well in any case; this chapter is much over due, I'm sorry for the wait. Again, school sucks. It's just not conducive for a creative atmosphere so sorry if the chap seems a bit…not good. On the plus side, chapter 25 seems to be coming along nicely so once I finish that I think it'll make up for this chap. Also, it is like chapter 23 but now it's through Remus point of view. Well with that all said, here it is; chapter 24!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam, Seri and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, their mine.

**Chapter 24**

Sirius' sudden sadness made sleep a very hard thing for Remus to accomplish.

"_Is it my fault? Did I do something? Maybe he wanted me to stay with Seri so he'd feel safe from me. So he could be sure that I wouldn't be after him. Is he going to start avoiding me or something now that we're not together?_"

The fact that sleep eluded him didn't help his appearance improve, considering what time of the month was coming up (ha-ha, it DOES sound like a period!). The moon was once more at its peck, in a few days it'd be time to go back to the Shrieking Shack.

And as we all know, with the moon came his sort of ill look. His skin was getting paler and he began looking ailing and malnourished. So of course, this, coupled with virtually no sleep, left him looking very unwell in the morning.

"God Rem, you look like hell!" James said, first thing, as they got up that morning.

Remus yawned "Thanks again, captain obvious."

James shook his head "Sorry, that came out wrong…I meant, wow Rem…you get enough sleep?"

"No. And what's worse the moon's coming up. Usually I'm near dead with sleep at this point…" he muttered as he got his clothes.

"Maybe you're just a little upset about yesterday." Peter said in a bleary tone.

Remus inwardly scoffed "_Yes, but not for the reason you think._"

"Sirius still asleep, wanna wake him?" Peter asked no one in particular.

James nodded "Sure. Oy, Pads! Get up, breakfast is awaitin'!" as he said this he tossed on of his pillows at Sirius head.

Surprisingly, it didn't reach Sirius' head, hell, it was caught before it could even reach his bed!

By Remus.

He frowned "Just leave him alone, if he wants to sleep let him."

James grinned "Aw come on Moony, lets mess with him while he's a sleep. I'm sure it'll make you feel better to get a good laugh. We can shave the top of his head, that'd be funny!"

"Or-or we could charm his skin to change colors!" Peter joined in.

James laughed "Could you imagine his face?"

"NO! Don't touch him, don't do anything to him!" Remus said, though it sounded more like a growl as he walk in front of Sirius' bed, almost in a possessive manner.

Both James and Peter gave him a look of disclosure, if not alarm at the sudden anger Remus had.

"Relax Rem! We were only joking." James said defensively.

"Well don't! I won't let you do anything to my-"

At that he stopped speaking.

"_My __what?_" he thought.

What he was about to say even he didn't know. Before, he was sort of in zombie mode (1), not really conscious for his previous actions, although now that he was, what he was about to say left him…he thought for a moment and the first word that came to mind was-

James stared at him questioningly and voiced what he was thinking "…You're **what?**"

Remus looked up when he spoke, though from the look on his face, you'd think he'd just thought of something.

"I-I…er…I have to go." He said and made for the door, abandoning his trunk.

"H-hey, where are you goin?" Peter asked timidly.

"Library. Gotta look up somethin' important." he said hurriedly as he went out the door.

Peter blinked as the door shut softly behind him "Er…should we have told him he was still in his pajamas?"

James smiled slightly "Nah, why ruin the surprise for him? Come on, let's go to shower so we can eat."

Peter nodded, but just as he was about to follow James out the door he stopped.

Sirius' toes were sticking out of his blankets…

Peter glanced around, as if making sure Remus wasn't somehow still watching, then grabbed his wand and (with a stifled laugh) whispered the charm and pointed it at Sirius' toes.

They went from red, to pink, to purple, to blue, to green, too yellow, to orange then back to red to start the cycle over again.

He grinned then went out the door.

---

Remus flew down the flight of stairs to the library, not meeting anyone as he went. Once at the library the old librarian gave him a scolding look "Mr. Lupin what are you doing here so early and in such inappropriate attire?!" she screeched.

"No time, I have to find something out, very important!" he said, not giving her another chance to speak as he dashed to the nearest shelf of books and began looking at the spines to tell him what category he was in.

"_I could be wrong, I mean, yeah, sure! I've been wrong before, yes that's it, I'm wrong. This is stupid, why am I even up here?! I'm probably wrong about it anyway!_" he thought somewhat frantically.

But one firm thought stayed with him even as he doubted himself "_I have to know for sure._" And that one thought was enough to keep him looking through the many rows of books until finally, he came to the one he was looking for.

"Ah, here it is! _Ways of the Werewolf_." He muttered, pulling it from the shelf.

Without even bothering to go to a table, he opened the book and began flipping through the pages, "How to kill werewolves, How to avoid werewolves, How to fend of werewolves…Grrr, come on! I thought it was called WAYS of the werewolf not how to defend against them!"

It was a while before it actually got to the behavioral patterns of werewolves but as he approached what he was looking for to begin with the anxiety he'd felt vanished and was replaced with an ominous cloud of dread.

Remus gulped "Ok…here goes…'Werewolves are known to hunt in packs, though in human form they are mostly alone and distant from others', blah, blah, blah, I know all this…oh wait…'Regular wolves are monogamous and stay with one mate for life. Though werewolves are not fully wolves this is one of the many quality they share. Another shared quality is scent. Werewolves and wolves can find their mate by smelling them out. The scents of their mates are stronger then any other scent they can smell. Wolves pick their mates by sexual intercourse as do werewolves, one difference in this process is werewolves have been known to mark one as their mate with a bite…in…in human form'…oh no…"

How his face could get paler was a mystery as he suddenly slammed the book shut and ran to the door again.

The librarian looked up angrily "MR. LUPIN, YOU MUST CHECK THAT BOOK OUT-"

But Remus didn't stop. With the book firmly under one arm he ran out the library and out of sight.

---

"Lily! Lily wait, please wait!" James called after Lily as she made her way to the girl's dormitory.

The Gryffindor common room was completely empty at the moment; everyone had gone downstairs to eat breakfast so there was no one around to hear them this time.

"I have nothing to say to you, James FATHEAD!!" she snarled, her back to him.

He sighed "Oh come on Lils, I don't wanna fight with you. Can't we just put this behind us?"

She turned, an angry look still plastered on her face "Only if you admit I was right!"

"Fine! You're right, I'm wrong, as always! No new news to report! Just please…" at this he grabbed her hands and looked her straight in the eyes "Can you forgive me?"

She stared at him for a moment, as if surprised he was giving up so easily.

He smiled "Please?"

Lily looked away, trying to hide a smile "You're making it hard to stay angry…"

"I know. And you know you don't want to be angry anymore, don't you?" he said with his usual grin.

Lily rolled her eyes but smiled "Well…you do have a point there Mr. Potter…oh alright, I forgive you."

He grinned "Can I have a kiss to confirm that?"

She let out a fake exasperated sigh "Oh well…I suppose."

James chuckled "You're sounding more and more like me everyday."

"Well…I guess you're just contagious…" she said softly as she leaned up to meet his waiting lips.

Suddenly the common room door burst open "James!"

He glanced over his shoulder annoyedly "Kinda busy at the moment!"

Remus raced up to them, looking paler then ever "No James, I…this…it's serious! Oh god, Sirius! How could I…idiot I can't…I mean, it wasn't…I didn't mean to…ugh, all my fault! I should've known!"

Lily blinked in surprise "Um, Remus, why are you in your pajamas?"

He shook his head "That's not important! James, I did something…VERY wrong…"

James sighed and turned back to Lily "Can we continue this later?"

She nodded "Of course hon. Now Remus, tell us what's wrong."

He tried taking a deep breath but he felt like his lungs were punctured and he ended up coughing "W-well…I…er…j-just read this!" he said, thrusting the book at them.

James blinked in surprise but opened the book none the less. The first page made Lily gasp and James look up at him with narrowed eyes "'_How to kill a werewolf_'?"

Remus frowned "No, not that! Here, give it to me."

James passed him the book and watched curiously as he flipped through the pages, muttering titles under his breath. Lily looked at James questioningly, as if asking if he knew what was going on. James could only shrug.

Finally Remus reached his page and gave the book back with somewhat more shaky hands.

James once more took the book and Lily looked over his shoulder as he read the behavioral patterns of a werewolf. Remus bit the finger nails on one hand anxiously as they read silently.

Once James had finished he looked up again "Er…ok…so we're reading this because…"

Remus groaned "You can't be serious…must I spell it out for you?! See this (he pointed at a paragraph in the book)? THIS is why I can't get over Sirius! Remember when I told you I felt like something was holding me back, how Seri didn't 'smell' right! It all makes sense I…ohhh, damn, what am I going to do?!"

James held up a hand "Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, hold on here! Now the book says that you have to have sex for that to happen and you didn't…did you? I mean, you set down the rules remember? You didn't…"

His eyes widened when he got no response confirming anything.

"AHHHHH!!! BAD METAL IMAGE!!!" he exclaimed, squeezing his head.

Lily blinked "Wow…er…I…honestly don't know what to say…"

Remus cover his face embarrassedly "It was an accident I…I don't know what happened! Something just…came over me. It was an instinctive thing, I don't know! I can't…really explain it…"

"WELL DON'T! I don't wanna KNOW any details!" James muttered, shuttering.

Lily shook her head "No, it's not that it's…Remus, you took advantage of Sirius. I can't **believe** I'm saying this but…I'm disappointed in you."

"But it wasn't me that did it though!"

"Oh really?"

"Yes! My conscious mind, the one you're talking to, DIDN'T do this! I told you, when it happened it was…something…I don't know! A primal sort of thing, it's hard to explain! The wolf in me got over excited and just…slipped out!"

"Do you think Sirius is going to accept that as an answer?"

Remus paused "Welllll…I was, sort of planning on NOT telling him and…trying to find some why to reverse it without him ever knowing anything."

James frowned "What're you gonna do, use a Time-Turner, go back and stop yourself from- UGH! Bad image back!" he grabbed his head once more, as if it helped get rid of his thoughts.

Remus gave him an annoyed look "Will you cut that out?! And in any case doesn't the fact that it happened prove that even if I did use a Time-Turner it didn't work?"

"No, you open another time-line with the Time-Turner then you'll have one time-line where he was and another where he wasn't your mate."

"Well then what good what that be to me, in this time-line!?"

James looked somewhat thoughtful "…Hm…good point. Well, at least one of you would be happy."

Remus frowned "James, this isn't joke!"

Lily nodded "Remus is right. According to the book if his wolf side is denied his mate then he'll go crazy and NOT just as a wolf. It could affect him in his human side to and because the moon so close to being full, he'll probably start going more by instinct then thought."

"What about Sirius? Will he be ok? I mean, he won't be forced into a corner or anything, will he?" Remus asked, thinking of it for the first time.

Lily smiled slightly at his concern "No, it says it's only one sided but that's bad news for you isn't?"

Remus sighed "Even if it is, I don't want to force him into anything. If he ever does want to be with me, I want him to want it…not because of something else, whether it be a potion or some stupid thing like this…"

"Awww, you really DO love him!" Lily cooed, making him blush slightly.

James nodded "Yeah, how mushy of you. 'Cuse me while I find a latrine to vomit in. Kidding!" he added when Lily gave him a sour look.

Remus frowned "Well, what should be do then? I mean, I don't want my wolf side to do anything to Sirius."

Lily looked up thoughtfully "Hmm…well, the book says you'll go crazy, but if you really don't want anything to happen to Sirius then you best keep away from him as much as you can. Don't avoid him completely, but try not to be to close to him either."

Remus nodded "Right. Ok, I could do that!"

James nodded as well "Sounds like a plan! Come on, if we hurry, we might be able to snag some food from the kitchen before class starts."

Remus smiled for what felt like the first time in ages "I agree, I'm starving…."

As they were about to head out though, Lily added "You know that means he can't become an animal when the moon comes right?"

"Whoa!"

"No, we can't tell him that!"

Lily blinked "Why?"

James frowned "Because, it's all he's been talking about ever since he remember that part!"

Remus nodded "It's true, he's really excited about this."

Lily sighed "Sorry guys, but you'll be a fully wolf at that time Remus. You won't be conscious of what's going on and anything that happens-"

"Will be on my conscious in the morning…" he murmured.

A small flash of his muggle friend came to mind…he didn't want anything like that to happen ever again and even if the results wouldn't be as extreme, he didn't want to risk hurt anyone because of that monster again.

He nodded "Alright…James, you tell him."

"WHAT?! Why do I gotta tell 'im?! You tell him!"

"Because I can't be around him that much and if I tell him we both know he will stop at nothing to find out why he can't come. Besides you're better at keeping secrets!"

James frowned "Well yeah but…er…you could…um…(scoff) fine…but if he's mad and wants to know why YOU'RE comin' up with a reason."

Remus shook his head "No, I can't come up with anything!"

Lily groaned "Oh for goodness sake! Fine, I'LL be the bad guy and tell him, ok?"

James and Remus both nodded at that "Thanks."

Lily rolled her eyes "Boys…"

James wiped his brow "Well, now that that's out of the way, lets go get that snack.

Remus nodded "Right behind you."

But as they went, a thought of trepidation could help but follow over Remus' head.

---

End A/N: Ok! Finally got that chapter down! Hope you guys like how it's goin', the next chapter's a doozy! Reviews are always loved!

(1): You know, when you're like half asleep and you let your subconscious do everything for you. Like, it's too early in the morning to be to mentally there for a class so you just kinda sit there in zombie mode. Well, that's what I meant anyways for you who didn't know, sorry!


	25. Chapter 25

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! My goodness! Why is it every time I think a chapter's horrible no one else does? Heh, it's funny, you guys really keep me going, you know that? Well, I'm glad so many of you liked last chapter and were so anxious for this one! I won't keep you from it any longer, here's chapter 25.

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam, Seri and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, their mine.

**Chapter 25**

Sirius hadn't done so much serious thinking in a LONG time, if ever at all. As far as he could remember he'd never really questioned himself like this before but now that he had, the questions seemed to never end.

"_Why hadn't I thought of these before? How long have I felt this way, BEEN this way? What else can there be about me…_"

"Who am I…really…" he murmured to the paper on the desk.

Self-exploration was nothing he'd ever really done before, but now that all these questions presented themselves he didn't know what to do about it.

In the dungeon, Ronts was surprised at his lack of sarcasm to what they were doing and even more so to his lack of speech in general. Sure, it was as dark and dank as ever, but he usually had some smart remark to make, just to make the class more interesting. But, she shrugged it off as nothing and released the class, noting how he absent-mindedly put his things back into his bag.

Sirius put his bag over his shoulder and exited the class. The hallway there was far lighter so one could actually see the thoughtful look on his face as he walked along.

The dungeon and the library were both on the same lower level of the school so he had to go up a few flights of stairs to get to his next class.

"_I have Transfiguration next…that guy Dylan is…nice, or whatever, maybe I can seat next to him today, see if I have any reaction to that…_" he thought; his eyes focused on his moving feet as he made his way up the stairs. "_Or, maybe this whole thing is a load of nonsense and I'm actually going insane. Or-or I'm having after-effects to the antidote._"

"_Oh come on, a change in life style isn't madness!_"

"_You, shut up. If I want your help I'll ask for it._"

"_All I'm saying is-_"

"LOOK OUT!!!"

But before Sirius could even look up books showered from the sky, though none of them really hit him because a person came the tumbling down the stairs first and crashed right into him and whoever it was probably got hit by the majority of the books. He did feel when his back collided with the hard floor however and felt the combine weight of whoever had fallen as well.

For a moment his eyes were closed in pain but when he opened them a gasp escaped his lips.

---

Remus had (of course) gotten dressed fully before he asked Professor McGonagall if he could go to Madam Pomfrey for the first class of the day. She, being one who knew of his condition, let him go without questioning it.

The full moon was only a few days off and she knew that he'd soon be completely drained, if not already was. Thing is, around this time, he usually would be. He'd sleep like there was no tomorrow and seem near dead to the human eye.

The reason being was that he body was conserving energy. It took a LOT of energy to change ones bone structure, completely against their will. And it took just as much, if not more, to change back.

"_And pain. It takes a lot of pain to._" He thought darkly.

But this whole 'mate' thing had really given him a burst of energy. He had to find out if there was some way to reverse it, he just had to! So, instead of going to Madam Pomfrey's room to sleep (as he usually did), he ran to the library and checked out a huge stack of books on werewolves. He would have stayed in the library but the old librarian kept casting him evil looks, as if she had something planned.

Considering how his last trip to the library went, he wouldn't be surprised if she did have some sort of trap or something for him, so he gathered up all his books and left the library.

He had to stack the books with his wand because all the books together went a bit over his head. He held his arms out as if to catch them and then flicked his wand at them, muttering "_Hoardmortum._" and they neatly piled themselves in his open arms.

Going up the stairs was easy, it was coming back down to put them back that was difficult. He'd found out only one new thing out of all the books. If the mate that a werewolf took WASN'T a werewolf like them, the werewolf would try to turn their mate into one. This only made Remus more nervous. Other then that, the books were of no help at all, none of them mentioned anything about annulling the bite and he'd been looking though them all morning. The second class of the day was about to start and he thought it best not to miss too much work, though all the teachers would full-heartedly allow him to.

He was on the last flight of stairs to the library. He'd had a few close calls back there, stepping on his robe, bumping into someone once, but it was now that his luck ran out. He overstepped in trying to get to the next step and felt himself lose his balance. The books went up in the air and he went crashing down.

"LOOK OUT!!!" he shouted, unaware if there was anyone there or not, but thought it safer to just give warning.

Turns out he was right and crashed right into the poor innocent by-standard. The books pelted his back as he and the person he'd rammed into fell to the bottom of the stairs.

However, once all the falling and raining of books stopped, he felt himself able to breath freely again and once he did, he knew who'd he had fallen with; it didn't take the gasp to alert him.

The rich scent that layered him…it was revitalizing and he felt that primal feeling growing as it had before when he looked back at Sirius and caught his eye.

But the confused look that met him brought his mind back to reality.

"_No! I'm not that mindless monster, I'm Remus!_" he thought, springing up from Sirius.

A bit of concern mixed with confusion as Sirius sat up "Rem, you ok?" he said slowly.

Remus stared at him for a moment before running back up the stairs he'd came, all the while fighting back the animalistic feeling deep inside that told him to turn back and take his mate.

"_He's not my mate, he's NOT! I've got to stop thinking like this, it isn't true!_"

"_**You can't fight what you are…**_" a dark voice growl.

He shook his head and quickened his pace, putting as much distance between Sirius and himself as he possibly could! He ran all the way until he reached the Fat Lady.

"H…H…Himplumup…" he panted as he came up to her.

She nodded and swung open and he raced inside. A few people were in, but only to get their books and such that they'd forgotten before going back out to their classes so no one was really too surprised when Remus rushed in and ran to his dorm.

As soon as he closed the door he kept his back to it, as if he thought Sirius were chasing him or something before he slowly sank to the floor, his hand on the sides of his head.

He closed his eyes for a moment and allowed himself the chance to breath.

Sirius' scent lingered in his nose.

"Ugh…I need to stop thinking this way. Even if by the wolf's standards he is my 'mate' I have no right to act as if he is! He wasn't even there at the time, I can't force this on him…" he muttered to himself.

For a moment he just sat there, but eventually, he was able to trust himself enough to stand up.

A yawn escaped him as he stood "Hm…maybe, I should take a nap…" and as he walked to his bed, he passed a mirror that hung on the wall and his thoughts were confirmed at one look at himself.

His hair was thin and seemed to be turning white with all this stress, his skin looked clammy and murky, the dark circles under his eyes were more noticeable then ever and his eyes seemed to have dulled.

James had put it best that morning, he looked like hell!

"Scratch that, I NEED to take a nap…" he murmured tiredly, dragging his feet to his bed.

Once he lay down, the coolness of the sheets was comforting, but just as he felt sleep nearing, the musky smell returned to his nose. He sat up to see if he was alone…he was.

He blinked in confusion for a moment but realized he'd been laying on his side a second ago, facing Sirius' bed. The smell was so strong; it was almost as if Sirius were still there…he breathed deeply and the succulent smell wafted to him once more, it calmed something deep within him.

Without really thinking about what it was he was doing, he got up out of his bed and walked over to Sirius'. The logical part of his brain said this was a bad idea, if Sirius or James or Peter happened to come in this would be very awkward to explain, but he didn't care. Logic could get stuffed, he hadn't had a decent nights sleep in a while and something told him it was because the wolf had been cut off from his mate.

Well, this would be the closest it'd ever get.

He lay down in Sirius' bed and pulled the pillow close to his face. The deep calming affect it had made his eyes droopy and he had a feeling he'd get to sleep this time.

He let out a contented sigh and snuggled closer to the pillow and let slumber consume him.

---

Now THAT had to be one of the weirdest things that had ever happened to him.

Remus had gotten up so fast, he probably didn't even realize he'd left his wand behind and what's worse, he just abandoned all those library books that Sirius now took back.

As he gathered them up though, he was surprised by titles of the books: _Behavioral patterns of a modern day werewolf, Life as a werewolf, How to deal with werewolves in heat, Mating patterns of Dark magical creatures_. The list went on and on.

But that wasn't even the thing that weirded him out most. The look Remus had given him when the falling had stopped is what gave him goosebumps. For a moment, his eyes dilated, his pupil was so wide, Sirius could see himself reflecting in them and he had a strange, almost animalistic look of hunger on his face…it was alarming, to say the _least_. But it was gone, almost as soon as it came.

He had jumped up, horror taking the place of the strange look and even as Sirius asked if he was ok, Remus looked like he was about to run, which he did.

Sirius shuddered, just thinking about that look creeped him out. What the hell was that about? And why was Remus looking through so much weird stuff? Maybe it had to do with the approaching moon.

Sirius frowned slightly "_Oh…I hope he's ok. We'll have to watch him extra closely if he thinks he's in heat or something. No wonder he's reading up on it, maybe he thinks he'll try to get a human here or something…do werewolves do that with humans?_"

He shrugged; you'd think they'd only want to do it with other werewolves.

The librarian was NOT HAPPY about the conditions of the books when Sirius returned them, but no matter how many times he explained it to her, she screeched that she'd be telling Prof. Dumbledore and he'd have detention for the rest of the year.

"You just wait, when Professor Dumbledore hears about this…now what's your name?" she snapped.

Sirius was tempted to ask if she was seriously asking him his name, but stopped himself. It was rare that he ever came to the library so of course she wouldn't know his name…he could be anyone he wanted to be right now.

A devious smirk came to his lips "Snape. Severus Snape, ma'am. That's with two 'E's…ah, there you go."

She scowled at him, her eyes magnified by her glasses "You think you're so clever Mr. Snape, well, we'll see how clever you feel when I tell Prof. Dumbledore about this!"

But why stop there? After all, Snape was always so keen to poke in their business and try getting them in trouble…it's not like he didn't deserve it.

His smirk widened "Yeah? Well you should also tell him that I, Severus Snape, think he's an empty minded GIT who knows nothing about running a school and that you, my dear lady, are a withered old HAG who looks ready to keel-over at any second."

The librarian's eyes widened comically behind her specs and her mouth dropped open, completely shocked that he'd said that.

Sirius inwardly grinned "_And now for the grand finale…_"

"Oh, and I ripped a couple pages out of those books for reference, scribbled in all the Standard books and sneak into the restricted section on a daily bases."

Anger replaced fear completely and she actually stood up, shaking with rage "Why you…you…you…"

"Again, that's Severus with two 'E's ma'am." He said with a cheeky grin and darted, just as she grabbed her wand.

She shot three spells at his feet, but missed "GET BACK HERE YOU, YOU MANGY SKUNK! YOU HOODLUM!!!" she screeched, actually leaving her library/sanctuary to chase after him a bit, but not getting to far from it.

Sirius was to fast anyway and was halfway up the second flight of stairs before he stopped running. He leaned against the wall for a second to catch his breath…once he had, he laughed so hard a few passer-bys gave him strange looks.

"Oh man…haha, I gotta remember to do that one more often…" he said as he calmed down a bit.

Just as he'd calmed himself though, the stairs began to move around, his that was originally leading to the Transfiguration switched around with the stairway that was going more towards the Gryffindor common room.

He blinked "Oh, well it's just as good, I have to give Remus his wand back anyway, I'm sure McGonagall won't mind me being a bit late."

Once the stairs ceased their movement, he continued going what was once up, though it was now down then went up a different set of stairs which lead to the Fat Lady.

"Password?" she said.

"Himplumup." He said, and walked in once she swung open.

Now, he wasn't _exactly_ sure if Remus would be here, but he'd probably either be in the dorm or in the Hospital Wing, because around this time, he'd be too tired to function and would be sleeping in one of the two places.

He walked up to the dorm and slowly opened the door as softly as he could. If Remus was in here sleeping, he got very angry when woken. And as he stepped in, soft breathing reached his ears.

He smirked, "Lucky guess."

As quietly as he could, he tip-toed to the counter by Remus' bed to put his wand there, but stopped when he saw Remus' bed was unoccupied. For a moment he stood there, confused, but not for long, as his eyes were drawn to the figure, laying on their back, in his bed.

Sirius blinked in confusion "Get to tired to tell our beds apart?" he whispered to the sleeping Remus after putting his wand on the counter.

All he got in response was his soft breathing. Sirius looked around "You didn't even draw the curtains close…" he whispered, waving his wand at the open curtains to close them and keep out the bright sunlight.

He smiled "There you go. You'll probably get a better sleep without those lights in your eyes."

Silence

He stood there for a moment, unsure of why really, just staring at him as he slept. Though it was harder to see now, Remus' skin was a shallow color…he was also really gaunt now, more then usual…he looked so fragile, like just one touch could break him…Sirius moved a bit of the tawny hair from Remus' face, though now it look so light that it was almost white…even his hair felt weak…he was practically vulnerable…

Sirius shook his head "What the hell are you doing, idiot? As if you're not late enough for class as it is…" he muttered to himself as he turned to the door.

Just as he was about to leave, however, something grabbed his arm.

"Sirius…"

Sirius' eyes widened and he didn't turn around at once, had Remus been awake that whole time? What would he say? How was he going to explain himself standing over him, watching him sleep, like some kind of creepy stalker?

Sirius cringed at the thought and slowly turned…and was enormously relieved to see Remus' eyes were closed, though his breathing was no longer soft.

"Merlin Remus, your hands are as cold as death…" he whispered, freeing his arm from his grip.

It was true to, Remus' hands were ice cold for some reason…but before he could give it much thought Remus spoke again:

"Hnn, no…please…Sirius…don't go…please, Sirius…" he whimpered, creases appearing on his forehead.

Sirius stared at him for a moment, why was he saying **his** name?

What could he possibly be seeing behind those closed eyes? How could he be involved…curiosity threw little threads around him and reeled him in as the question posed itself again, why did he say his name?

Slowly, without even realizing that he was moving, he leaned forward over the edge of the bed cautiously…

Keeping in a yelp of shock was all he could do, when he sudden felt a hand grab his arm once more and pull him down to the bed with surprising strength.

His breathing went ridged as Remus put both his arms around him and spoke once more:

"Please don't go Sirius, don't leave me…" he mumbled, almost desperately.

"_Well at the moment, I don't think I can…_" Sirius thought, wiggling slightly to try getting out of his grip, only to have Remus hug him tighter. "_Dammit Remus, let go! I'm already late enough as it is…_"

But thoughts of that nature stopped when Remus spoke again:

"Don't leave me Sirius, don't leave I…I love you…" he whispered.

Sirius stopped all movement and glanced over at him to see his eyes were indeed close but behind his eyelids he could see them moving (1), there was no doubt that he was asleep.

"…D…Do you, mean that?" Sirius said aloud, not really expecting an answer.

But he got one.

Remus' grip loosened slightly "Yes…I mean it, so badly I do…I love **you**, Sirius…no one else…"

And that was it.

No more speaking after that, though Remus did keep his grip on him for a while.

"_He's just dreaming._" He told himself.

"_But he's dreaming about YOU._"

"_SO?! Th-that doesn't MEAN anything! Last night I dreamt James played an entire Quidditch match naked, does that mean I love him?!_"

"_No, it means you shouldn't eat biscuits before bed! And in that dream you didn't say things like 'I love you', you told James to get some clothes on._"

"_Well even still! I mean, if Remus does mean all that, that doesn't mean I return the feeling!_"

"_Well do you?!_"

"_I…I don't know! I mean…ugh…I dunno anything any more…_"

"_Maybe you should ask him out, you could find out that way._"

"_Are you mad?! After what just happened, all that love potion crap?! And the fact that we've been trying to set him up with other people?! No, no, his reputation is just barely getting better, I can't destroy it all again!_"

"_I don't think he really CARES what they think. I think he cares more about what you think! Why, if you ask me-_"

"_WHO THE HELL __**ASKED**__ YOU?!_"

"-_If you ask me, I think he really does lo-_"

"_Would you shut up?! Look, maybe, I dunno, but one thing's for sure, I can't do anything about it now. I could ask him out or whatever but what good will that do? I need to have more time to myself, just to straighten it all out…_"

And that was the end of that.

He laid completely still as Remus' breathing slowly went back to normal, whatever he was dreaming about seemed to have passed.

Sirius hadn't bothered to try moving for a while now. He and Remus were somewhat face to face…and again, he was reminded of how frail he looked…his lips were parted slightly, even they seemed to had lost some color…even in such a weakened state he did look…moderately handsome…he also looked helpless…something about that made Sirius want to stay there, just to make sure nothing would happen to him.

"_What, in the dorm?_" he almost scoffed at the ridiculous idea.

But as he stared at Remus' sleeping face, a thought formed…

"_M…Maybe…maybe I do…_"

Remus let out a small groan and released Sirius, then turned to his other side.

Sirius remained in his spot for a moment, but slowly got up from the bed and walked out of the room, shaking his head "That's the last time I do a good deed…"

---

Remus yawned and stretched his hands high over his head "Ah…that had to be one of my better sleeps…" he murmured.

"_That dream though…_"

He couldn't remember if it'd had been good or bad, just that Sirius was in it…almost as if Sirius was actually there…

"_Don't be stupid, it was probably just because you could smell him on this bed._" he thought, pushing the covers back.

His back popped slightly as he sat up and stretched again "Ow! I swear…I won't be surprised if I break something just by waking up one of these days…" he muttered to the darkness.

He blinked, as if just hearing what he'd just said, "Dark? What time is it?" he put his hands in his pockets but…

"Oh no…wh-where's my wand?!" he exclaimed, groping around the dark room.

It wasn't until he'd bumped his foot on the counter did he feel up there and relief spread fast once he felt the tip of his wand.

"When did I put my wand on the counter?"

"_Well you must have done it sometime, it's there isn't it?_"

"Yes…I suppose…" he said, though he didn't sound fully convinced.

"_Maybe you did while you were half-asleep. It was poking into your side so you put it on the counter then went back to sleep…_"  
He frowned "That could've happened but…well, I don't remember waking up at all…"

Whatever it was, he just shrugged it off and pointed his wand at the curtains to see if the sun was even up.

"When did I close the curtains?"

"_Ugh, just forget about it!_"

The curtains showed the sun was down and the moon was beginning to rise, though it wasn't up all the way, it gave a sort of glow that lit the room nicely, as if calling out to him.

Remus frowned at the sight of it "Yes, yes, I know…three more days by the look of it." He muttered darkly.

As much as he hated the moon, he feared it to…feared what it made him become…

"Well, if I'm lucky maybe dinner is still being served…" he said, trying to shake off the awful feeling he usually got when thinking about the moon.

With the mind set of dinner firmly in his main thought, he pulled on his shoes and going out the door. He didn't meet anyone on his way to the Great Hall so he was right in his assumption that dinner was still being served.

As always, some people turned to look when the doors were suddenly opened and surprised to see Remus just barely coming in, looking sickly as ever. A few whispers circulated.

"Oh, he's sick again."

"Look at how pale he is!"

"I wonder what's wrong with him…"

He'd grown somewhat use to the usual questions on his appearance at this time so he didn't really falter. One thing that made him perturbed was the cold look Severus Snape always seemed to give him at this time.

Remus had a strange feeling that he knew, but was keeping it over his head…as if to blackmail him with it later…it made him _very_ uneasy…

At the end of the table, Remus was surprised to see the back of Seri's head among his friends. He'd had thought that after their break-up she'd want to keep a bit of distance for a while, but didn't really mind either way.

He smiled as best he could as he sat next to her "Evenin' guys." He said, stifling a yawn.

No matter how much he slept during these times he just never felt rested enough.

Seri smiled at first but it feel once she saw him "Oh Remus, are you alright? You look awful! Do you have a fever? You should probably still be in bed." As she said this she put a hand to his forehead.

Peter let out an unhappy sigh and looked back at his plate.

Remus smiled at her concern but waved off her hand "No, no, I'm fine. In any case I haven't really eaten much all day."

"You certainly have slept enough!" James said jokingly.

Seri frowned slightly "I don't know…Sirius said you were so tired you couldn't even tell which bed was yours, you should probably get more rest."

Remus knocked over a goblet "Er, sorry…"

"_HE WAS THERE?!?_" was what almost slipped out of his mouth.

He slowly glanced up at Sirius who seemed to be concentrating hard on his plate. Remus could see he looked almost…embarrassed?

"_Oh no…how long was he there for?! Did I say anything in my sleep?_" he thought horrifiedly as he stared at the mashed potatoes he'd absentmindedly been spooning onto his plate.

Dinner was oddly quiet as the prickling sense of embarrassment took up most of the table.

James looked both at Sirius then at Remus "_Hmm…I wonder…_"

---

End A/N: Alrighty! Not my best ending but I couldn't really think of a good ending for the chap so bare with me! Whew, was that chapter long or was it just me? I dunno, it just seemed incredibly long to me. In any case, hope you guys liked it! Reviews please:D

(1): That would be R.E.M sleep, Rapid Eye Movement, the state you're in when you're dreaming. Heh, funny it's called that huh? Rem, R.E.M, haha, sorry I'm a nerd!


	26. Chapter 26

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Awww, you guys are so nice! Well, I made this chapter nice and long just for you, extra on the drama! I can only hope you guys like as much as the rest. Enjoy my good people, enjoy!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam, Seri and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, their mine.

**Chapter 26**

Remus was surprised to find, it wasn't that difficult to stay away from Sirius for the next few days. In fact, it almost seemed as if Sirius were trying to do the same for some reason.

Often times Sirius would have a sort of uncomfortable look on his face if they ever locked eyes, as if he were embarrassed.

"_I must have said something, but what? I can't even remember what the dream was about!_" he thought to himself whenever Sirius would quickly break eye contact and stare at the ground.

Whatever the reason, it was probably for the better because as the moon approached he started to feel restless. He didn't trust himself to be alone with Sirius longer then a few minutes, sometimes not even that long.

Then, the time finally came.

The actual day that went on before the full moon rose always made Remus miss all of his classes. He was more tired that day then on any of the others leading up to it and usually stayed in bed.

However, with this day, he felt a sudden burst of energy for the primal lust he felt grew stronger. He couldn't even be in the same room with him now, because whenever he was, he wanted nothing more then to slam him to the ground and shag him silly, no matter if anyone was there or not.

In all honesty, it was starting to scare him, he felt like he was losing control of himself.

"_God, is this what animals in heat feel like? No wonder people keep them locked up…_"

Sleep was hard to accomplish with the want he had slowly growing into a need, but he didn't want to risk going to classes and make the teachers question why. They all knew he should be exhausted, he wasn't about to break routine.

Before he barricaded himself in the dorm, however, he did have a talk with Lily.

"You're sure you'll be able to keep him occupied tonight?"

She nodded "Yep, I've got a good excuse to keep him here and everything."

"Ok, I just want to be sure…and you're positive it'll keep him here?"

Again, she nodded "Yes, I'm asking him to help me with a charm so as long as I pretend to mess it up he'll still be here."

Remus nodded but still didn't feel assured "Right…you'll make sure he doesn't even go outside?"

Lily laughed slightly "For god's sake Remus, yes! Don't you trust me?"

He sighed heavily "Of course I do…it's **me** I don't trust…"

She smiled sympathetically and put a hand on his shoulder "Relax, everything'll be fine."

"I hope you're right…"

---

Lily waited till just after lunch to pull Sirius aside and talk to him, she led him outside were she was pretty sure there were no listening ears.

"What's up Lily?" he asked in a would-be casual voice. He didn't seem as nonchalant these days as he normally would be, like something was eating at him from the inside.

"Well Sirius, er, you know how the full moon's today and all?"

That snapped him out of his dream-ish state and caused him to look sharply at her "…Yeah, what about it?"

She took a deep breath "Well, I don't think that…er…well, what I mean is…I need help with a-a charm and I was hoping that you could help me with it…tonight."

He smiled playfully "Why not ask for James' help?"

"Well, he's the biggest animal of you guys, right? Doesn't he need to be there to, well you know…"

He sighed "True…but this'll be the first time I've ever changed and actually be there for it! Can't I help you some other time or can't you get extra help from a teacher, or someone else?"

Lily looked away slightly, now she knew why James and Remus didn't want to do this. He sounded really disappointed and…he was really good at making you feel guilty.

"_No, no! Have to be the bad guy…_" she told herself.

"But, you're the best in our year! I want help from the best and going to a teacher would be embarrassing…please Sirius? Just help me this once, ok? Please? I need to know it by tomorrow!"

Sirius looked over at the Whomping Willow "But-"

"PLLLLEEEEEEAAAAASSSSSEEE?" she said, trying to sound as desperate as she could.

Lily was surprised, she must have been really convincing because he sighed and, though he did look sadden, said with a smile "Alright, alright, I'll help you…but you better really need my help for making me miss out on this."

She smiled "Yes, I do. Well, we better get to class. Thanks again Sirius, bye!" and darted back into the castle.

He blinked "Er…ok…" and confusedly started to his first class.

Now most of the day (with his new schedule) Sirius shared his classes with mostly Hufflepuffs but there were a few classes shared with the Slytherins.

In History of Magic Sirius usually sat in the far off corner, away from everyone else. Not that it matter, this was usually thought of as a free hour as it was. People passed notes, talked softly, slept and did extra work there so no one really thought it strange.

This was the class were Sirius felt freest to think without anyone bothering him today, however, he was in for a bit of a shock.

Severus Snape usually sat alone as well, but as everyone filed in the class, he took the one seat next to Sirius.

Sirius frowned as he did "What do **you**, Snape?"

He gave Sirius a somewhat evil smirk "What? Can't I sit wherever I want or is this class under dictatorship?"

Sirius scoffed and looked away from him "_Well there goes a good hour of thinking out the window._" He didn't trust Snape in the slightest and knew he wouldn't be able to concentrate knowing Snape here wanted something.

It was obvious he did, or that he knew something because people don't smirk like that without reason, the question was, what did he want?

But Snape liked to play head-games, he waited until the class was halfway in and Sirius was starting to drop his guard when he spoke again:

"So…you and that mudblood girl Lily seem to be good friends these days…" he said carelessly.

Sirius sat up attentively "Don't call her that, _Snivellus_."

His smirk widened "Good friends indeed…I heard you talking outside today."

Sirius shot him a nasty smile "Been spyin' have you? I'm surprised I didn't see your grease hair reflecting light from wherever you where…" though he seemed confident on the outside, inside, his heart couldn't be beating any faster.

Snape was just bluffing right? And it's not like they just out and said what they were talking about…

Severus dropped his false demeanor and frowned "What's happening today by the Whomping Willow?"

Sirius frowned "Nothing."

"_Damn! Just where was the slim-ball anyway?!_" he thought, remembering how he glanced at the Willow, but just for a moment.

But he must have spoken to soon, for a horrible smile came to Snape's face "Ahh, so there is something going on…I wasn't to sure, it was mostly a guess. Well don't worry Black, I'll find out what's going on…"

"Get stuffed!" Sirius snapped, turning away from him.

Snape chuckled but said no more directly to him, but made small comments such as 'I wonder what you're missing out on Black' or 'Animal…what did she mean by animal I wonder'.

It made Sirius uneasy the entire class and he all but darted out of the room once they were released.

"_Got tell James to watch out for Snape._" Was he main thought as he ran down the corridor, dodging people and slipping through the crowds, hoping to catch James in the hall.

Luck was on his side; James and Peter were parting just now. James had Ancient Ruins while Peter had Divination. Sirius ran up to James, who smiled when he saw him "Hey Pads, how's-"

"James, Snape knows…" he panted, trying to talk while out of breath hurt.

James blinked "What?"

Sirius glanced around at the people who were also going to class and lowered his voice "I think Snape knows, about Remus."

At that James' eyes narrowed and he leaned in a bit "You sure?"

Sirius nodded "But not entirely. He sat next to me in History of Magic, said he over-heard me and Lily talking today. Oh, by the way, I won't be coming tonight."

"Well at least we have that in our favor."

"What?"

"Nothing. So what'd he say?"

Sirius gave James a suspicious look but continued "Well, it's not like either of us went into much detail about it, but he kept give me this look, I swear it's like he knows Legilimency or something! I don't think he got anything though. He kept saying they were more like guesses. Just watch out for him tonight though, I dunno if he'll try anything."

"You didn't say anything like how to get-"

"No, but we better not talk about it here, I've got a bad feeling, like he's listening somehow…"

"With ears like his it's hard not to I suppose." James said, in a small effort to brighten the situation.

Sirius managed a small smile; though it wasn't heart-felt "Yeah…well, just thought I should warn you."

James nodded "Thanks, I'll keep an eye out for the git. See ya."

Sirius nodded "Right…"

---

Remus woke up for what had to be the 11th time, stretching his arms over his head.

"Hmm…boy I'll be glad when this is finally over…" he murmured sleepily.

He blinked a moment as he started to wake up "Wonder what time it is…" he said aloud.

With a yawn he got out of the bed and pulled the curtains back. The sky was a beautiful orange-yellow with a bit of purple above it as the sun began to set.

Remus frowned "Hm, it's about that time, I better get ready."

He lit one of the candles so he could see his trunk, got his robes and such out and began to change. Once he had he went downstairs to the common room where only a few people were.

Only a few of the classes had let out so the rest were still in session.

Remus sighed and took a seat in on of the chairs close to the fire-place. Madam Pomfrey told him to come once the classes were done because students were less likely to be there if he came when they all went back to their dorms.

Now came the time he sometimes referred to as 'the great wait'.

He stared at the flames, thinking, but was slightly distracted when he noticed someone in another chair, head down slightly with their eyes closed.

He frowned slightly "Lily?"

She jumped and looked up "Hm? Oh…(yawn), hi Remus."

"Hi…are you ok?" he asked slowly.

She nodded "Oh yeah, I'm fine! We were just learning a new charm today, puts people to sleep…" as she spoke, her voice sounded distant, dreamy even as she swayed a little.

Panic started to rise as she closed her eyes, "Oh no…Y-you've got to stay awake Lily! Who's gonna keep Sirius distracted?!"

She waved a hand "Oh don't worry! I'll be fine…it'll wear off…"

Remus groaned "Someone must hate me…"

Lily's head rolled slightly as she softly started to snore.

---

The dungeon's cool darkness didn't calm any of James' nerves as he anxiously looked at the door. Potions seemed to drag on forever! While he did this, Peter sank fearfully in his chair.

James had told him once they met up again what Sirius had told him about Snape and Peter convinced that now Snape was 'reading his mind'.

"He keeps looking over here! He knows James, he knows! Oh we're gonna get in so much trouble!" Peter whispered fearfully.

James shushed him but couldn't help but notice he was right, Snape was looking over at them an awful lot…maybe he did know Legilimency…

He smirked "Aw Snivellus, don't you know I'm way out of your league." He said mockingly, causing a few people to laugh.

Snape's frown deepened "You wait Potter; I know you're up to something and when I find out what-"

"Blah, blah, blah. Sorry Snape, you're just not my type, so do me a favor and look at someone else for a change." James said coolly, turning away from him.

Snape sneered but said nothing more on the matter.

The rest of the class was agonizingly slow but eventually they were released and both James and Peter rushed out the door and hurried to the Gryffindor common room.

"Pass-"

"Himplumup!" James said quickly and wasting no time to push the door open.

---

Remus jumped slightly when the door burst open "Oh, hey guys, what's wrong?"

"He…Snape…know!" Peter panted as they came in.

James rolled his eyes "It's nothing. What's wrong with Lily?"

He figured it was better to tell Remus about Snape later, he was under enough stress as it was. And as for Lily, she was leaning against the couch with her eyes shut, mouth opened slightly.

Remus ran a hand through his hair "She said they learned a new charm today, Prof. Flitwick had them practice it out on each other, it's a sleeping charm."

James sat next to her and shook her lightly "Lily, come on hon, get up!"

She opened her eyes hazily and smiled "Oh, hehehe, hey James…haha, you're glasses look funny…"

He shook his head "Oh man, she's still half asleep. Lils get up! Come on, you have to watch Sirius remember?"

Remus frowned "Pour some water on her or something! We can't have Sirius-"

"Can't have me what?"

Remus stopped short and went rigid, not turning around.

Behind him, Sirius closed the portrait door and approached them curiously, he repeated himself "Can't have me WHAT, Remus?"

Remus swallowed hard "_Oh god, not now!_"

"Um…er…can't have you…skip out on, helping Lily. She's a little tired, but she really needs your help!" James said; get in front of Sirius as he made his way in.

Sirius blinked "What?"

"Yes! Yes that's it, Lily just over worked herself, trying to learn to hard…but she's UP now!" Remus said, walking over to Lily.

As he said 'up' he gave her arm a hard pinch.

She jumped up "OW! Why'd you- Oh! Oh, er…hi Sirius! I'm awake now, let's start practicing!" she said, once aware of what was happening.

Remus looked at James who still had Sirius in the doorway then at a chair. He did this three times before James got the hint and quickly pushed Sirius to the chair "Yeah! Er, Lily needs your help so, you just, come over here and help her!"

"And uh, I'll go to Madam Pomfrey now, bye!" Remus said hurriedly as he inched to the door.

Sirius frowned "Wait a minute!"

"BYE!" and without looking back he slammed the door.

The few other people in the common room cast confused, if not somewhat amused looks at them. Sirius, however, was not amused in the slightest.

"What the hell's goin' on James?! What're you guys hiding from me?" he said angrily.

James looked away "Hiding?! Who's hiding something? No one's hiding anything!"

Sirius frowned "Right, and Snape's just looking for new friends, that's why he's spying on us! James, I'm not stupid, I know you guys are up to something. Why can't you tell me?!"

"I…I…er…h-here! Help Lils out, I've gotta ahhhh…Go help Prof. Sprout with the planting! I promised you know!" he said, quickly making his exit.

Sirius frowned then glanced at Peter who shivered under his piercing stare.

"And…I…I…I have to do…that…thing! In the…thing…with…the thing…"

He tripped over his robes as he rushed out of the room, slamming the door behind him. Sirius glared after them, even after they were gone he still looked at the door, as if expecting them to come back.

Finally he sighed and turned back to Lily "And I suppose the chances of YOU telling me are none existent, right?"

Lily didn't answer, she was sitting in the chair again, her breathing in a soft rhythm.

He crossed his arms and sighed exasperatedly "Right…"

---

(A/N: Quick note guys, to me, in my own twisted mind, the animals can all understand and speak to each other. Remus is technically a wolf so he'll understand them as well. Sorry if that bothers some, I just don't think it'd be much of a scene if there were no dialogue! Also, it starts to get a little intense from this point on...)

The walls of the Shrieking Shack had the paint pealing off, mold was growing in some place; it was a wonder how they even still stood! The whole house had a murky feel to it; from the dust that layered the house down to all the scattered bits of furniture everywhere. There were about 4 rooms in there as well. Downstairs was the living room, kitchen and upstairs a bathroom and a bedroom.

And in said bedroom, a wolf snarled viciously and scratched at the door and walls that kept it in there.

"_**Dirty humans! Trapping me in here…keeping me from my mate!**_" he thought angrily, stopping his attack on the walls and doors to pace the ground, trying to think of another way out.

Normally, it wanted out to kill and perhaps make some more werewolves, but now it was for a whole different reason. Wolves are surprisingly social animals, it felt alone and needy for his mate.

Snarls slowly morphed into howls of sorrow as it scratched at the walls.

"Remus, you ok?" a voice asked from behind the door.

The wolf stopped scratching at the walls and looked questioningly at the door "Who is there?"

"Hold on, back away from the door." The voice said.

The wolf didn't need to do so but moved so the other voice would know it was out of the way. Once it had, two great hooves knocked the door open and they belonged to a dark brown stag.

He had strange patterns around his eyes as well as the rest of his body and on one of its antlers sat a plum rat, it to had strange patterns on it.

The wolf stared at the two newcomers "You seem…familiar, to me."

The stag nodded "Yes, we were with you before, remember? I told you, I am James, the rat is Peter. You're Remus. Remember?"

The wolf paused for a moment "…Hm…James…well, I know not this 'Remus' you speak, but I am glad to see you. You must help me escape this place; I have to see my mate."

James moved nervously "Er, no…I mean, you should really just, stay here and wait for your mate to come to you…right?"

The wolf growled lowly "No…I cannot wait! This is worse then having no pack…the bone scarring loneliness of that almost breaks my heart everyday…please, wouldn't you wish to be with your mate in a moment of such horrible seclusion!? My friend, if I can call you that, will you not help me? I swear, if you do, I will tell my brothers to leave you and your family in peace, just don't keep me from my mate!"

James stared at the miserable wolf for a moment, speechless.

Peter scurried to the middle of his antler, closer to his ear "Hey James, I don't think we'll be able to keep him here, he sounds so…desperate."

James shook his head "We just have to stall him…"

"But how can-"

The wolf suddenly perked up with a gasp "Could it be…" it pushed past James and went down the stairs.

James quickly followed after, not noticing Peter falling off his antler with a soft squeak "Remus wait!"

The wolf did not wait; he went until he was back to the door…where a big, shaggy, black dog stood.

James skidded to a halt "Oh no!"

Sirius looked up at James' voice "Oh hey James, Lily fell asleep and- OOF!"

The wolf tackled Sirius to the ground, staring at him possissively "Oh, how I've longed to be with you, my mate…"

Sirius' eyes widened "What?!"

"No more words, I need you now!" the wolf growled lowly, positioning differently…

"Shit! Get the hell off me!" Sirius barked, kicking and squirming under the wolf.

But the wolf was too heavy, stronger then him and kept him pinned "Stay still love, I don't want to hurt you."

Sirius gasped, his movement getting more desperate "JAMES HELP!!"

James pranced frightenedly around them "I-I-I I don't know how! I don't have arms and if I step on him I'll squish you to!"

"Then squish me! Just don't let him…" the sentence was better left unfinished and James knew it.

He reared back on his hind-legs…but he couldn't crush his friends, he swerved and stomped hard next to them. But this was enough to frighten the wolf enough so it stopped it actions and the pause gave Sirius enough time to quickly scramble away.

The wolf turned with a snarl to look at him "What're you doing…James?!"

James stomped next to it again, forcing the wolf back "Sorry Rem, but I can't let you do that. Sirius, get outta here!"

The wolf's fur began to stand on end, it bared it's teeth "You will not keep me from my mate…I'll kill you if I must!" and with that it sprang at James' side, taking him to the ground and ripping into his side, causing him to let out a noise of pain.

"GET OFF HIM!!" Sirius snarled, jumping on Remus' back and biting down as hard as he could. The wolf howled in agony, abandoning James to get Sirius off his back.

Up stairs, Peter looked down squeaking with fright "Oh! What should I do, what should I do?! I'm not big enough to help…what CAN I do!?"

Downstairs, though both James and Sirius teamed up, the wolf had unbelievable strength and the wound in James' side wasn't helping anything.

He groaned and started to sit "S-Sirius…it's gettin' kind of dizzy in here…"

Sirius panted, nursing a bleeding paw "No James, get up! Please, come on!"

The wolf stalked forward, blood dripping from above its eye "Enough of this…mate, you will come with or I will make you by force and I do not wish to do that."

Sirius' eyes widened and he swallowed hard "_Oh no…what are we gonna do…?_"

"Pst, Sirius!" a small voice squeaked.

He glanced back at the stairs where Peter was scurrying down.

"Sirius, say you'll go with him, I've got a plan!" he squeaked desperately.

Sirius breathing quickened "Pete, you sure? I don't want-"

"Trust me!"

He hesitated, but as he did the wolf stalk closer, looking more at James with a look of rage…

"A-alright! Alright I'll…I-I'll go with you b-but you have to promise to leave James alone. Don't kill him!" Sirius whimpered, his voice quivering. For the first time in a long time, he was really scared…for real!

The wolf nodded "Ok. Come, we'll break our way out of here and try to join a pack. I'm not sure where we are, but we'll find them."

Sirius shivered but nodded back "R-r-right…"

"_A pack of WEREWOLVES?! Oh, you better have a good plan Peter!_" he thought, timidly walking up to the wolf.

Behind him, meanwhile, Peter was coxing James to come up the stairs.

"Come on James, I know it hurts, but you're the only one who has the muscle for this! If you push that table off the stairs on him, it'll knock him out! Come on, please James, get up!" he squeaked.

James groaned painfully but forced himself to his feet and hobbled to the stairs, staggering at every step.

"Come on James, you're real close!"

The wolf took no notice to this as it went back to the door "Now, if we just get this out of the way we might find a pack before sunup…"

James grinded his teeth together, forcing his body to keep moving as it protested. Once Peter was sure he could make it on his own he went back down the stairs.

Sirius kept his distance as the wolf tried bashing the door with its side.

"Pst, Sirius!"

He glance down "Peter, what now?"

"Get him to go under the stairway, James is gonna push a table over his head."

Sirius looked sharply at him "You sure that won't hurt him?"

"Yes!…no…ok, not really no, but I'm positive it won't _kill _him!"

Sirius gave him a long look.

Peter glanced back at the stairs "Look, it's better that we hurt him to knock him out then keep him conscious and…you know…him doing…whatever he wants…"

He did have to agree with that.

"Alright, leave it to me…" he whispered.

Peter nodded then hurried back to check on James.

Sirius swallowed hard "Er, R-Remus?"

He got no response.

"_That's right…this isn't Remus, it's a monster…_"

He took a deep breath "Mate."

The wolf turned from the door "Yes?"

"Um, don't you think we'll need some…f-food, before we go? It might be…a long trip…" Sirius said nervously.

The wolf glanced at him "We can hunt on the way."

"W-w-well, actually, there's some…food, in that room, over there…"

Peter attempted to help James push the table "Ugggh, just a little…further!"

James was pushing it with his head to the edge-

"Ok, ok, stop, stop! Now we just have to wait till Sirius gets him there!" Peter shrilled.

James gasped for air, his neck matted with sweat.

---

Sirius glanced up and saw them in position.

"Come on! Quick, we have to get it all, right now!" he said, running to the kitchen.

The wolf shook its head with a sigh "Very well." And walked calmly after…

"NOW!" Peter screeched.

With a great heave James pushed the table. The wolf could only look up but had no time to so much as move his tail as the table crashed over its head, breaking even.

Sirius covered his eyes with a paw "Sorry Rem…"

There was no doubt about it, the wolf was out-cold and would remain so for sometime.

Peter, no longer sensing danger, changed back to his human state and ran downstairs "Sirius! Are you ok?"

Sirius' snout shank to a nose and his bleeding paw turned into a hand as he stood up "Y-yeah…I'm fine…"

"Good, so help me up here, James is really hurt!"

Both ran up the stairs to where a stag no longer lay, but James. His side had a deep gash but he otherwise looked ok.

Sirius kneeled down next to him, tapping his face to keep him awake "Oh James…hey, can you hear me? James…talk to me…"

James' eyes were half closed but he managed to lift his head. A small smile came to his face "S-so…Lily's conked out on ya huh?" he said weakly.

Sirius bit his lip "Stay right here, I'm going to get help."

"No. No, don't get Madam Pomfrey…Dumbledore'll kill us if we…he finds out…we're illegal Animagi…" he panted.

Sirius frowned "I don't care! You're hurt, you need help!"

"No…just…go to the room…L-Lily gave me an idea earlier and…(cough)…I…I stashed a book of h-healer spells in there…under the mattress…y-you could use those…"

Sirius' frown deepened "But-"

His breathing was slightly ragged "Come on Pads…you don't wanna…get expelled…do you?"

Sirius stared at him for a moment "…Pete go get the book! You're crazy, you know that?"

James grinned weakly "Thanks…"

---

End A/N: WHOO! Ok, that's it so far. Sorry, I really hope this chapter meets your guy's expectations, I really tried! Tell me what you thought, review!


	27. Chapter 27

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! I was so scared to post last chapter! I wasn't sure if anyone would like it, I don't know why, but I kept thinking everyone would hate it terribly and flame me till I was a crisp! I'm glad at least a few of you liked it; don't ask me why I was afraid, I just was. Maybe cuz it didn't met my impossibly high standards, I dunno, I just thought everyone would hate it. As for this one, it's somewhat better in my opinion. So, here you go guys, chapter 27

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam, Seri and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, their mine.

**Chapter 27**

Darkness…then, even behind his closed eyelids, blinding light appeared from above.

He groaned painfully and unwillingly opened his eyes "Ow…" though now that he was conscious, the rest of the pains began to make themselves known. His body ached all the way to the bones in his fingers, but worse was the pounding of his head. He felt like a drum.

"Mornin' Moony." A voice said from some region next to him.

Remus reluctantly opened his eyes "Ugh…my head…feels like someone dropped a…a…"

"A table on your head?"

He blinked, his eyes still adjusting to the light "Er…sorta, I guess. I wouldn't know; I've never had a table dropped on my head."

The voice chuckled "Oh yes you have."

The light was starting to lose its flare and as it did he was able to see his surroundings. The dusty, pealing old wall paper, broken furniture, murky smell…he was in the Shrieking Shack alright.

But what surprised him was that he was on a mat under the window and James, who was lying on the bed with a bandaged side and a few scratches on his face, but looking otherwise fine, cheerful even.

"James…oh no, what'd I do?" he said, making to sit up but the sudden blood rush to the head made him lie back with a painful groan.

James frowned slightly "Easy Rem, you probably have a concussion. You didn't do anything, that crazy wolf did."

Remus closed his eyes and rubbed his head, hoping to dull the pain "What…happened?"

James sighed "Well, it's not to pretty. You see, er…Lily kinda, fell asleep and uh-"

"Oh no…don't tell me Sirius came here…" Remus muttered, opening his eyes.

James nodded "Sorry, but he did. The wolf went crazy and…well…it…we fought it, cut into my side but at least it didn't bit me."

"It wouldn't have mattered if it had, you were in animal form it wouldn't have affected you. Did I hurt anyone else?" Remus asked darkly, sitting up slowly this time.

James looked at the sheets "Well, you got Sirius' hand, scratched him cross the face to but…I don't think you did anything else."

Remus slowly stood up. He bit the inside of his lip to keep from making any noise of pain. Whether he injured himself or not, changing back always left him sore all over, but he felt he had no excuse this time and forced himself to do so anyway. He winced as he walked over to the bed where James lay.

"Easy Rem. Lie back down if you're hurting yourself." James said, noticing that he was holding the bed to support himself.

Remus shook his head "I'm fine. Are you ok? Did Madam Pomfrey come to help?"

James grinned at that "No way, we'd have been in so much trouble. I nicked one of the healer books from the restricted section. Werewolf injures are easily cured, if your not human. I don't know if any of the other spells in there would've healed me on the spot or not, but the book said it'd be safer just to stop the bleeding and let my body heal itself. Good thing the next Quidditch match isn't close. I should be better in about a month or so."

Remus frowned guiltily "It's that deep?"

James waved a hand carelessly "It's fine. Sirius was pretty good at those healer charms, gave me a nice pain killer, which is probably why I feel so bubbly…heh, it's like someone's tickling me from the inside!"

Remus looked around the room, it was just them. "Well where is he? And Peter?"

At that James' smiled faltered slightly "Er…Pete went to get us some food from the kitchen and to get Lily but uh…Rem, for your own good, I don't think it'd be a wise idea to talk to Sirius right now."

Remus rubbed his head with his free hand "…He knows then?"

James looked at the ground "Oh yeah, he knows alright…and he's not exactly happy to have found out this way…"

Remus let go of the bed, but almost fell back when he did. He really wasn't in any shape to be stand, let alone walking, but the physical pain his body felt was nothing compared to his overwhelming guilt.

"_He knows, what am I going to say to him? How can I explain? I…and worst off I hurt James! Maybe…maybe this Animagus thing was a bad idea…and Sirius…oh, he'll probably want to kill me…_" he thought as he heaved himself to the closet wall.

With much effort, he got away from the bed and leaned against the wall. But his legs started to give way and he instead sank into a sitting position, his back against the wall.

The guilty thoughts in his head started to swirl around and buried his face in his arms, as if that might have helped rid him of them "One could only imagine how angry he'll be now…yikes…"

James nodded "Big yikes."

A ringing silence followed that. Outside the window, the sun was shining brightly and some birds were chirping cheerfully, a few even perched on the window ceil, as if to mock Remus' unhappiness.

He scoffed "At least someone's happy."

James opened his mouth to say something but the sound of footsteps running up the stairs made him stop.

The door burst open and Lily rushed to James' side. She kissed his lip with all her might before frantically saying "Oh James, I'm so sorry! I tried to stay awake, I really did! It's all my fault, are you hurting badly, do you want me to get you anything? Oh I'm such an idiot! James, I'm soooo sorry!"

"Er, Lily's here." Peter said from the doorway.

Remus smiled slightly "We can see that?"

James grinned as she gave him multiple kisses "Am I gonna get this every time I get hurt?"

Lily laughed though she looked more like she was going to cry. Her eyes shone brightly and she sniffled, taking his hand "I'm just glad you're ok." She whispered.

James smiled "Oh, come on Lils, no tears. Here. Come on, come here." He said, arms open for a hug.

Lily kept her eyes on the ground guiltily but slowly walked around to his unwounded side. She stood there for a moment before lowering down to his level. James propped himself up on his pillows and put his arms around her, pulling her down to the bed beside him.

He smiled "I'm fine. Really. I'll be better before you know it, just a scratch really."

Despite how hard she tried not to, a few tears slid down Lily's face as she tightened her grip on him "Not from what Peter said, but in any case it's **my** fault it even happened, I'm so stupid! I just…I was afraid…if I'd lost you…I don't know what I'd do…" she said, her voice sounding thick and strained.

James frowned slightly "Well what does Peter know? I'm the one with the injury! No offense Pete."

Peter blinked "Uh, none taken?"

James looked back to Lily "The point is, I'm fine, Lily. The pain killer I have has put me in a good mood and you're spoiling it. Come on, smile, please? I'm fine and I don't want to see you cry. If you want to make it up to me, you could put on a happy face and give more of those kisses."

Lily chuckled slightly and released James only to wipe her eyes "Alright James…then consider these tears of happiness, not guilt."

James grinned "There ya go. Ah, the famous Eves smile! It's been known to hypnotize."

Lily laughed "James! I really love you, you know that?"

He flashed a cheeky grin "It's hard not to."

She rolled her eyes playfully and gave him a powerful kiss.

Peter snickered "You two want a moment alone?"

James nodded when Lily pulled away "If you please."

"I'd love to go James, but my body doesn't seem to be able to move…" Remus said slowly, trying to push himself onto his feet, but his arms shook feebly at the pressure.

Peter smiled "I can help you Remus."

With a bit of difficulty, Peter managed to pull one of Remus' arms over his shoulder and help him off the floor. It looked a bit comical at one point when Peter almost dropped him.

Remus smiled gratefully "Thank you Peter. Would you mind walking me to Madam Pomfrey?"

He nodded "Sure thing."

However, just as the two were about to go out the door, it opened.

Sirius sighed as he pushed the door open "Peter, you forgot what you went into the kitchen for. The house-elves were-" at the sight of Peter supporting Remus up his eyes narrowed "Oh, I didn't know he was awake." He said in a cold tone.

He glared at Remus for a brief moment before walking to James' bed and placing the table cloth of food at his feet. With what looked like tremendous effort he smiled "Here you go, hope you don't eat it all to fast."

James nodded "Thanks Pads."

Sirius continued the painful smile "Right. Well, let me see your side, gotta make sure it's mending ok."

Again, James nodded only Lily stood up to give him room as he kicked off the blankets and sat up. A heavy silence filled the room as Sirius pulled out the healer book and unwrapped James' side. Remus looked like he wanted to say something, but words eluded him.

Sirius muttered some words and pointed his wand at James' side before giving him a thumbs-up "All good. Now's as good a time as any to change your dressing to."

James nodded with a smile "Whatever you say, Healer Black."

Sirius grinned, though it to, looked strained as he jokingly muttered "Shut up." and wrapped a new string of gauze around him. Once he was through, he stood up "All set. See you later." and walked to the door rather quickly.

Remus found his voice "Sirius wait-"

"I have nothing to say to **you**!" he said coldly, not even making eye contact as he reached for the doorknob.

Remus, still being held up by Peter, hobbled closer "Well, I want to talk to you, could you please just hear me out?!"

Surprisingly, Sirius turned but what wasn't surprising was the look of rage on his face "Oh, so now you're **finally** going to tell me what's going on?! Well thanks, but I already know, so don't waste your breath!"

"But you don't know the whole thing! Just, let me explain!" Remus implored.

Sirius glared at him furiously "Oh there's MORE?! Well that's just bleedin' perfect idn't it?! Other then almost raping me last night, making me you're mate without even asking me, THERE'S MORE?!?"

Remus let go of Peter and used the wall to hold him up instead "WHAT?!"

Sirius scowled "Last night, why do you think we were fighting you off so badly?!"

Remus turned back to James who laid on the bed "Why didn't you tell me?"

James held his hands up defensively "Hey, leave me out of this!"

"That's right Remus, you leave him out of it! Or should I say _mate._" He said the last word with so much anger it was surprising he wasn't beating Remus at this point.

Remus frowned "But that wasn't me!"

"No it was the big bad wolf! You're always blaming that side of you for everything! As if you'd be a perfect angel if you weren't a werewolf!" Sirius snarled.

Remus glared at him "…I…didn't…do it…" he said in a calm fury.

Sirius met the glare with an even fiercer one but didn't speak. Instead, he unbuttoned his robe and took his off shirt. All of them winced when he did, for one his collar bone, just below his neck-line, there was a red scar; it looked almost as though it were throbbing.

He frowned "See this? I've been waking up for 9 weeks, wonder, what happened. AND NOBODY TOLD ME ANYTHING!! I ALMOST WENT TO MADAM POMFREY! Do you know how scary it is to wake up with a scar like this and not know where the hell it came from, what it meant!?"

Remus was silent and stared at the ground.

But Sirius wasn't, he was angry and his voice had jumped to a shout "NINE FUCKING WEEKS REMUS!! AND YOU KNOW WHAT THE WORST PART IS?! IT BURNS! SOMETIMES, AT NIGHT, I DON'T KNOW WHY, BUT IT'LL BURN!! WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?! WHY DID YOU THINK YOU COULD HIDE THIS FROM ME!?! DON'T YOU THINK IF YOU'D TOLD ME WHAT IT MEANT I WOULD'VE STAYED AWAY?!! NOW JAMES IS HURT AND IF YOU ASK ME, IT'S **YOUR** FAULT!!!"

His yell shook the house a bit and absolute silence followed it.

Remus hadn't looked up as the accusations were being made, but he did slowly once they were through. He looked very tired, old even, but sincere as he opened his mouth "I…can't really say…I don't think I was thinking…you're right though, I shouldn't have kept this from you…and I'm sorry…" he said softly.

Silence.

Sirius glared at him "Oh you're **sorry** now, are you!? Well great! Here that guys, Remus, is sorry! Wow! That fixes everything doesn't it?!"

Remus didn't meet his eye "I didn't mean for this to happen, it wasn't my fault-"

"Well then who's fault was it then, MINE?! No, Remus, this WAS you're fault." Sirius said viciously, walking closer "I've been left out of all this because you were afraid to confront me, do you think it helped? Don't you think you could've just TRUSTED me and told me what the hell was going on?! NO! You left me in the dark and nearly got James killed!"

In the bed James slowly spoke up "Um, I wasn't hurt that ba-"

"James stay out of it." Lily whispered.

Sirius was now standing face to face with Remus, his unyielding anger seemed to hit its boiling point as he grabbed him by the collar, pulling him away from the wall that supported him "But worse then all of that together…you used me…" he said in a deadly whisper.

Remus' head hung low, his hair shielding his face.

Sirius' frown deepened "You, of all people should know, I TOLD you! I may not have been mentally there, but I TOLD you…and I'll tell you again. I- don't- like-being- used!!!"

The last syllables seemed to echo in the silent room. But Sirius' anger still didn't seem satisfied. He shook Remus' collar roughly "LOOK AT ME GODDAMN IT!!"

Slowly, Remus lifted his head.

Though not a punch had been thrown, he looked thoroughly beaten as he met those angry gray eyes.

"You stopped me for a reason. Was there something you wanted to say?" he asked in the soft whisper once more.

Defeated, Remus shook his head and Sirius let go of his collar, he once more used the wall to stand.

"That's what I thought…" he muttered, turning curtly and marching out the door.

It was silent, they could hear his angry footsteps going down the stairs and all heard the front door slam forcefully and felt the roof shake with its force. And still, even after he'd left, no one said a word.

Remus head hung low once more, though now he used the wall to inch towards the door "I'll be downstairs, if you need me…" he said in a hoarse whisper.

Peter made to help him but James motioned him to stop and shook his head.

Even if he did have the pain-killing charm making him a bit loopy, it was obvious, Remus needed to be alone right now.

---

Sirius stormed out of the tunnel, dodging the swing branches of the Whomping Willow without care. Blood still pounded angrily in his ears, he wanted nothing more then to turn around and fight the Willow, just to get out some of his aggression.

Yelling at Remus didn't help as much as he'd first thought it would, in fact, it just made him feel a bit guilty, if anything.

"_I shouldn't feel guilty, he deserves it! And good kick in the pants to! Why is it every time I start to think 'maybe' something happens to make me say no?!_" he thought as he made his way back to the castle.

He didn't even bother going to breakfast, instead, he went to the dungeon and was there before even Ronts showed up, just sitting at his table, thinking, still brewing over his anger.

"_Well, maybe the circumstances it happened in were bad but-_"

"_BAD?! The guy practically raped me!"_

"_Ok, rape is a bit strong of a word, don't you think? I mean, for all you know you could have provoked it_."

"_Oh, you mean the me that was INTOXICATED BY A LOVE POTION?!? THAT DOESN'T COUNT! It wasn't ME, the me, me that said yes, to me, it's rape. He USED me! I can't STAND that! It's bad enough my parents did all my life. Maybe not sexual but it's still the same!_"

"_Well maybe he didn't!_"

"_Uh, yeah, he did, I've got the scar to prove it._"

"_No, no, no, not that. Maybe he didn't use you._"

"_Weren't you just listening? I've got-_"

"_NO! Don't you get it? What if he really DID like you? Is it using you to be with someone you like?_"

"_Even if he did, you know what, it's called being used when he didn't get my consent!_"

"_Well try to think of it from his point of view! You're, not the real you, but your body and voice are telling him things. And you know Remus, he hasn't even had a date before! Then suddenly you come along, even if it's not the real you, your voice is telling him all kinds of things, he's never even heard before. I mean, for all we know, no one's ever spoken to him like that. So you're telling him all these things and he starts taking them to heart._"

"_Ok, now permit me to puncher a hole in your little thing. Don't you think Remus would be able to control himself better then that? I mean, he's always the one who's sticking to the rules, no matter what!_"

"_This is a bit different from rules, in a way, you were kind of…toying with him._"

"_WHAT?!_"

"_Even if it wasn't YOU, you told him you loved him all the time and that's the time of game, he's never played before. Chances were, he didn't know the rules. I mean, it's not like you can really control who you like, love even and-_"

"_You know what, just SHUT UP! Why is it every time I talk to you I feel WORSE?!_"

"_I'm your conscience, it's what I do._"

"_Well bugger off! I'm already angry enough without you!_"

He sat angrily at his desk, but now, on top of the anger came some real thought. His conscience did have a point, on a lot of things. This only added to his growing frustration.

It wasn't long before the class joined him in the cool class room. Ronts was the first in and completely surprised to see him there "Why Mr. Black, how nice to see you so early. Funny, I thought you would've known by now that you should wait for the TEACHER before coming into the class…" she said with a somewhat joking air.

But Sirius was numb to it. He kept his arms crossed and said no greeting, or even acknowledged her at all.

Ronts blinked at his indifference "Sirius? Are you alri-" she was cut off by the entrance of the rest of the class.

She cast him one last concerned look but shrugged "_He'll have to wait; I have a class to teach._" then smiled at the rest of her students "Good morning class! Well, today we start work on Pitrinum wrath. If you'll all get out your books to page 567 and read the first 8 paragraphs silently to yourselves and we'll discuss it once you've finished…"

As the class went on, Ronts couldn't help but notice Sirius lack of effort entirely. He didn't even bother to get his book out and when she instructed them to partner up and get started he sat away from everyone else.

Ronts frowned and walked up to his table "Sirius is everything ok?"

He didn't even look up as he said "Leave- me- alone."

Ronts scoffed "Oh come on! I don't know what could be bothering you so badly but you should keep the drama until AFTER class, if you please." she always talked like this to Sirius, he started it most the time anyways, but today was different.

Sirius scowled at his hands "I'm not exactly in the mood right now, could you please leave me alone." he said without giving any indication he was joking around.

Ronts frowned "Really now! What's gotten into you?"

Finally he looked up; his gray eyes clouded with anger "Not a love potion, that's for sure."

Ronts took a step back in surprise "Wha?"

"Come to think of it, it's your fault to!" he said, his eyes narrowing "I mean, what IDIOT doesn't make an antidote to a potion, are you that dense!?"

The shock wore off at that point and Ronts' frown was no longer one of concern "Now see here, I am a teacher and you will talk to me with respect-"

"WELL MAYBE YOU SHOULD EARN IT!! You know what hell I've just been through?! And it's half your fault! If you can't even make an antidote then why should I try anything else that may lead to harm! What kind of teacher are you?!"

"**THAT'S ENOUGH!!!**" Ronts' face was red with anger and she shook terribly. Most the class had never seen her so anger, it was somewhat frightening even!

"25 points from Gryffindor and you have detention during break hour! Now get your sorry carcass outta my class! I don't care where you go just GET OUT!!!" she shouted.

Sirius met her angered eyes with his own as he yelled "**GLADLY!**" and got up from the table. He marched out of the class and slammed the dungeon door hard behind him.

It wasn't until he was halfway down the hall did his brain catch up with him.

"_That…wasn't smart…_"

He sighed and closed his eyes "I know. That was dumb but…ugh, I was just so angry! And…I wasn't…really thinking…"

"_Well, let's just try not to ever do that again. Stop and think before you talk._"

"I know."

"_At least you've got detention to look forward to._"

He scoffed "Goody."

"_Well, it'll probably help you calm down. Doin' manual labor usually uses up aggression._"

"Hm, maybe…"

---

While the rest of the 6th years were busy studying for their N.E.W.Ts, Sirius was walking to Filch's office. He sighed distainly and knocked on the door. It wasn't long before he was face to face with a rather gleeful looking Filch.

He grinned nastily "Ah Black. Why am I not surprised? Well, you'll have to wait before scrubbing those trophies you'll have to wait because someone is joining you today."

Sirius scoffed, still a bit steamed, but more level-headed "Hooray."

Mrs. Norris meowed almost cheerfully and walked around his legs, as if rubbing in the fact that he was in trouble. Sirius scowled and resisted the urge to give her a swift kick.

He and Filch waited a while outside his office until, much to his surprise-

"Ah! Snape, you're a new one but it's always a pleasure to make you good for nothing students to a bit of **actual** work." Filch sneered as he approached.

Sirius blinked in surprise, but also a bit of delight at the reluctant look on Snape's face. They met eyes for a moment and Snape scoffed, knowing fully that Sirius enjoyed seeing him in trouble as well.

Filch thrust a bucket at them both and motioned them to follow him, cackling as they went. Both walked in silence, though Sirius was itching to tauntingly ask what Snape was doing here.

When they finally came to the large trophy case, Filch unlocked the it, slide the glass casing open and turned with a huge, creepy grin "Well boys, get to work! I have to fix the upstairs room; I'll be back in an hour to check your work. Get polishing!" and left with that annoying laugh, Mrs. Norris following faithfully at his heels.

Snape, surprisingly, walked swiftly to the nearest trophy, took it out and started polishing. Sirius followed in suit, though not before casting him a curious look.

It was silent for a good 10 minutes before Snape sighed "Just ask, I know you want to." He sounded more annoyed then anything, apparently noticing the small glances Sirius gave him

Sirius smirked "Alright, what're you in for?"

"I'm not really sure, to be honest. I was returning a restricted book I used and when I told the librarian my name she was so infuriated she marched be to Dumbledore's office and screamed about how I disrespected them both…" he said, scrubbing roughly into the trophy.

Sirius stifled a snicker, remembering full well that whole ordeal but his smirk widened at the information "Hm…"

Snape glance over at him "Now it's my turn. A question for a question, what happened yesterday? I saw Lupin limping, barely able to move in 3 hour. What's more, he seemed horrible depressed."

At Remus' name Sirius gripped the trophy so hard the polish on it made it slip from his hands. He picked it up and began scrubbing it with much more vigor then before, not answering Snape's question.

Snape noticed the change in his mood.

"Hm, you seem to have gotten in some sort of fight with him then…the Whomping Willow was involved somehow…you pushed him into it?" he mused.

"It's none of your concern Snape, back off." Sirius said through his clenched teeth.

"But then he would be in far worse condition then just that. No…something else happened. He looked really tired, sore…what else could it be…" he continued.

"Mind your own business **Snivellus!**" he shouted, dropping the trophy and polish all together.

At this Snape actually looked at him, a devilish grin on his face "Hm…you must have really had a row then. So defensive about it…so…angry…not at all able to hold your composure, the usual cocky Black style…"

Sirius felt his blood rising again "Snape I'm warning you-"

"I heard about what happened in Ronts class. The whole school practically did…Lupin looked terrible after he heard, worse then he did before. Almost as if he were…guilty…of something…" he said, cutting across Sirius' threat.

Sirius cast him a hateful glare, he was toying with him now.

Snape grinned once more, a look most unsuiting for him "If you just tell me, maybe I'll drop it. Save you the torment."

"Or maybe I can knock your hideous yellow teeth out, I'm sure that's shut you up!" Sirius snarled viciously.

"But for how long? I could keep this up for months…how much of it can you take?" Snape said tantalizingly, ignoring the insult.

Sirius scowled, his anger getting too much to bare "You know what, fine Snape! You really wanna see what's going on?! Go to the Whomping Willow tonight, around 12 I'd say, poke the knot at the bottom of the tree with a branch, it'll be still then go down the tunnel and you'll find exactly what you're looking for, NOW GET YOUR BIG UGLY NOSE OUTTA MY LIFE!!!!" he shouted, marching angrily to the other side of the trophy case.

Snape smirked as he stalked off "There, now that wasn't so hard was it?"

"BITE ME!" Sirius snapped, grabbing a different trophy.

"_Oh wait, I don't want any more of that. ARGH! So aggravating! Hm, oh well, it'll probably cheer me up a bit to see Snape getting that long nose torn off his stupid face…_" he thought bitterly.

Today, was NOT his day.

---

End A/N: YES! Finally! Hey guys, I'm sooooo sorry for the long wait! It took forever for me to finish it up, I posted it as soon as I finished it! Please, tell me you didn't hate me for it. Hope the chapter was good enough, I'll try updating sooner but…ARGH, I HATE SCHOOL! Sorry, reviews are always welcomed!


	28. Chapter 28

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Ok, how do I say this…I'm so sorry if this sounds rude, I swear I'm not trying to but this is the only thing I could think to say…have some of you even LOOKED at the sky when the moon is full? Sorry, that was mean wasn't it? I'm not exactly what you'd call a 'people's person', I'm aware my people skills need work, sorry! I mean, it's understandable, with today's technology, how not many people even _**go**_ outside anymore, am I right? Well in any case, the moon is full 2, if not sometimes 3 days in a month. Yes, it was full last chapter, but only a day has passed so the moon will be full in this one as well. If you disagree with me on that, fine, whatever. But in the world that I've created for this fic, it is full twice. Sorry, I had to mention it, and it doesn't apply to everyone. I just got so many comments on it I HAD to say _something._ Maybe that was the wrong thing though, I'm really not sure. Hope that didn't make you angry or anything, I didn't mean to. If anyone's still there, enjoy the chap:)

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam, Seri and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, their mine.

**Chapter 28**

Remus hobbled down the stairs as best he could. He'd seldom seen Sirius that angry and it was always pointed at someone else whenever he was. But to have that directed at him…it made his heart throb worse then the rest of him.

All that anger…

His mind was so wrapped in self-pity he missed a step of the stair and tumbled to the bottom of the stairs, landing on his left side. He down hard on his tongue to keep from shouting in pain, he didn't want the rest to come down; he just really needed to be alone right now.

With a small groan of pain he picked himself off the ground. "Ow…just the rest of my life of this…" he muttered bitterly as he staggered to the ripped up couch.

The couch was a dark shade of orange and had most of its stuffing and all ripped right out of it. Scratched and bitten to pieces almost, the springs sticking out, but at the moment, it was far more comfortable than the floor.

He laid on his back for a moment to survey the room.

Closer to the door was a large blood stain, James must have been over there. And the broken table was right under the stairway…they had to knock him out to keep him under control, because he almost-

The thought made him cringe, but it was true. He did, he almost raped Sirius and with that realization came a worse one. Everything Sirius had said upstairs was right…it **was** all his fault…

The broken table bits he stared at got blurred. He bit his lip, turned over and buried his face in the couch cushion. The harsh words Sirius had said earlier had finally sunk in. Hot tears rolled down his cheeks and his body shook slightly.

It was a very depressing sight.

---

He wasn't sure how long he had lied there, just weeping bitter tears, all he knew was what seemed like the next moment he felt a gentle hand on his shoulder, though even it's soft weight made his shoulder ache further.

"Remus…" a voice said softly, almost distantly.

He didn't lift his head though he now stopped himself from shaking "Go…away…" he managed to choke out, his voice thick and quivering.

Lily looked back at James, who was standing, though not as straight as usual. She looked unsure, silently asking whether they should just listen and leave or not.

James frowned slightly and walked closer to the couch, wincing slightly as he did "Hey Rem…if you want, I can talk to him."

"What's the point James? He hates me; he'll always hate me now. I'D hate me if I were him…he has every right to be angry, to yell at me…and he was right, about it all. God, I'm such an idiot! SO stupid! He's right, he told me…he told ME and he'd never told anyone else! How his parents just used him, how he was just a _tool_ to them! And…and I betrayed him…I don't deserve to live…" his voice was weak and feeble but his words were spoken truthfully, he really meant what he'd said.

James' frown deepened "No, you can't MEAN that…I mean, yeah, you screwed up but everyone does! And this wasn't even a _huge_ thing; you don't deserve to die over it-"

"Yes I do. I'm a horrible, horrible person and deserve nothing more then death." He said into the pillow.

"Remus stop saying that! Look, we can talk to him, sort this whole thing out. Just…come on, we need to get you to Madam Pomfrey. You can eat, sleep the rest of the day and come back here, ok?" James said, in what he hoped was a nice voice.

He just hated it when his friends beat themselves up, it made him angry.

"I'm not hungry." He whispered sullenly from within the couch cushion.

James groaned "Remus, for god's sake, would you snap out of it?! You were wrong, you apologized and that should have been the end of it! It's not your fault Sirius is bein' a-"

"James." Lily cut across his rant, earning her a confused look.

She walked closer and bent down at Remus' side. For a moment she stayed there, leaning on her toes and said nothing. Finally, she took a breath and started by saying "…I'm sorry, I really am. If it helps, I take some of the blame for this…it's not ALL your fault…"

Remus said nothing to this and still kept his face well hidden in the soggy cushion.

She smiled slightly "You can stay here for now, but once you've gathered yourself, I think it'd be best if you went to Madam Pomfrey. You don't deserve death any more then I do for what happened. Do you think I deserve death?"

At this Remus lifted his face, red and tearstained. His throat was currently closed off so he simply shook his head. Lily's gentle smile was far more soothing then James' rough pep-talk.

She nodded "Exactly. I understand you're hurting terribly right now and you want to be alone. That's fine…" she pulled out her wand and pointed it at one of the only NOT broken candles in the room, closer to the kitchen "But when the flame goes out from that candle, you should probably leave. Ok?"

"Yeah, and if you're not back in the castle by third hour Pete and I'll come back here and drag you out…by force." James added, half jokingly though somewhat seriously.

Remus sat up, wiped his cheek with his hand and nodded; his voice still to thick to let his vocal cords move.

Lily sat next to him and as gently as she could, gave him a hug "Everything's going to be fine. You'll see." She said softly.

Remus winced as she did, but gratefully returned the hug. It may have hurt his already sore body, but it greatly helped his wounded heart.

"Thank you." He said as best he could.

Lily nodded and released him.

James crossed his arms and frowned jealously "Oh I see how it is, fine, go to Remus then."

Lily rolled her eyes and gave him a soft kiss "Don't be that way."

"Yes James, with all the love problems I'm having as it is I'm going to be totally irrelevant, ignore all my other problems and try to steal Lily from you. Genius." He said softly, at least making an attempt to cheer up, though his tone was still somewhat somber.

James put on a face of mock anger "Exactly! You were trying once, now you are again!"

Lily shook her head "Whatever you say James. Come on, if we get there soon enough maybe I can finish my Transfiguration essay before class."

James grinned, "Right-O! Come on Pete. I'm serious though Rem, on both accounts."

Remus nodded "Kay, thanks…"

Peter, who'd thought it best just to let the experts handle this situation, had been walking around the shack, as though he were looking at it from the inside for the first time. But, upon being called, he waved bye to Remus and followed Lily and James out the door.

Remus chuckled slightly, those guys…they really were great friends…but with their leaving left the small bit of happiness he'd obtained. Guilt set in once more as his thoughts went back to Sirius.

He sighed "This is going to be a long day…"

---

As he promised, he got up when the candle was out and went to Madam Pomfrey, wincing as he did.

She was surprised to see that he had no broken bones, or even so much as a scratch on himself, though gave him a little concoction of her own that she'd made a while back, just for his pains. He wasn't sure what it was and although it tasted terrible, it always made the searing pain lessen.

"Well, just one more day of this." She said, trying to be cheerful.

"One more day, but also one more life time…" Remus muttered. Hard as he tried, he couldn't help feeling awful.

Madam Pomfrey could find nothing to say to that, so she quickly changed the subject "Yes well, you just lie down and get some rest. I'll give a bit of a sleeping potion if you're having trouble. You need your strength for tonight."

Remus stared at the ground "…Which class is going on?"

Madam Pomfrey looked up thoughtfully "Hm…well, I believe second hour is just ending…"

"Madam Pomfrey, I know I need sleep and all that but…well, I just don't feel like sleep. Would it be ok if I go to class, just for today, please?" he asked softly.

In all honesty, he was very tired and wanted nothing more then to sleep here on the soft bed. But even stronger then his physical fatigue was his guilt and anger with himself. Whether he wanted sleep or not, he BELIEVE he didn't deserve and, as a sort of punishment, thought he should go to all his classes as though nothing were wrong.

Madam Pomfrey frowned at this "Remus, you know you're body _needs_ to rest-"

"I know, but please. I don't really ask you for much do I? Can't you just let me, this once, pretend to be normal?" he implored.

She stared at him for a long time, considering what he'd asked. She sighed, the look on her face seemed to say she was doing this against her better judgment, but never the less, she nodded "Alright…you can go but you MUST come back, if you feel like it's too much. Alright?"

Remus nodded "Yes ma'am. Thank you."

He tried not to wince as he stepped off the bed. Straightening his posture as best he could, he made for the door.

---

"How's your side?" Peter asked as he and James made their way through the noisy hallway, out of second hour.

James shrugged "Ok I guess. Come on, we gotta go check and make sure Remus is out of the shack."

Peter nodded "Right. Oh, can we drop our stuff off in class before we go though? I don't want to have to carry it all the way there."

James sighed "Fine. I just hope Rem's not beating himself up anymore."

Again, Peter nodded "Yeah…it's awful seeing him like this. He's usually so composed or whatever…it's like he's having a break down."

"I know…it's weird, I never thought I'd have to help _him_ like this. Kay, my third hour's closer so we'll drop my things off first." James said as they passed a group of whispering girls.

As they came up to the door though, they were surprised to see the back of a head worn-colored hair that they knew instantly "Remus?" James said in surprise.

He turned and a ghost of a smile came to his face "Hey guys."

"What're you doin' here? You should be asleep." James said, though now he sounded somewhat more authoritarian.

Remus sighed, knowing that tone "I got permission from Madam Pomfrey, I'm fine."

James frowned "You don't look fine. You should really be sleeping."

"I don't want to miss anything important for the N.E.W.Ts, I'll be alright." He said, though he didn't look at all convincing about it.

Peter gasped as people started to hurry to their classes "Uh-oh, I gotta get up to the tower! Er, you guys mind finishing this without me?"

James nodded "Yeah, see ya Pete."

"Bye Peter." Remus said as Peter dashed to the nearest stairway.

James frowned; they still stood in the doorway "Remus-"

"Come on, class is starting. I'm fine…really." He said, walking in before James could get another word in on the subject.

James' frown remained, but followed after him none the less.

This classroom was really no different from any of the others; it had large tables that seated three, four at the most and most of the students sat with people of their own houses.

James and Remus were luck enough to get a table to themselves, neither noticing who was around them or behind them for that matter…

The Ancient Ruins teacher, Professor Sandora, greeted them all with a smile "Good morning class. Well, if you all get out your books."

As they all did this though, he suddenly noticed Remus sitting next to James and his smile fell. He walked up to their table and lent towards Remus "Mr. Lupin, are you sure you're alright to be in here? Shouldn't you be resting?" he whispered, though now the class was silent, trying to listen in.

Remus shook his head "I'm fine. I've got permission from Madam Pomfrey."

"_And I have no right to rest, I deserve this…_" the voice of guilt chimed in his head.

Prof. Sandora looked unconvinced but sighed "Alright…but if you feel tired or anything, you have permission to leave."

Remus nodded "Thank you sir."

He straightened up and walked back to the front of the class "Right then, ok class. Yesterday we discussed _why_ the ancient text is no longer used but how it's still of value of us today. Now who can tell me why?"

The class went on as usual with no real difference, though Prof. Sandora did cast some worried looks over at Remus as he taught.

Remus didn't really notice. He kept his head down and wrote notes, though he was hardly focused on them. He couldn't stop thinking of Sirius. His anger towards him…it tore his heart up.

Another difference was a rumor began floating around in whispers when they did their note taking.

"Did you hear about Black?"

"You mean how he blew up in Ronts class?"

"I heard he was so angry, he cursed her!"

"I heard that she gave him detention for the rest of the year!"

"I wonder what set him off…"

James turned to face the table that was whispering "What was that?"

A guy with spiked blond hair looked up at him "You didn't hear? Sirius Black went crazy in Ronts' class this morning. They said he started a huge row with her and she kicked him out of school!"

At that even Remus looked up "What?!"

The boy nodded "It's true!"

Remus bit his lip "Kicked out?"

James leaned closer to their desk and asked for more details, but Remus had stopped listening at that point.

"_Oh no…I got him so angry he probably got kicked out of school for it! And it's all my fault…I screwed up everything…_" he thought horribly, the ache in his chest increasing.

"That enough of that. You lot, get to work!" Prof. Sandora said, walking between the desks.

A pained look must have come to Remus face, for next the Prof. turned to him "Really, Mr. Lupin, you simply don't look well I _insist_ you go the hospital wing. Who would be willing to taken him to Madam Pomfrey?"

"I will!" **two** voices said.

James and Remus both looked back in surprise to see Severus Snape half-way standing. Neither had noticed he was behind them, or that he had been leaning close and listening to them.

What could he want?

Remus slowly stood, his aching muscles and bones screaming in protest "I can go alone sir…" he said quietly.

Prof. Sandora frowned "Are you sure?"

He nodded "Yes. Thank you though." He murmured.

"You can leave your stuff Rem, I'll take it up to the dorm." James said when Remus bent, wincing as he did, to pick up the extra weight.

He nodded and made for the door.

James watched him leave and once he was gone turned to Snape who sneered and sat back down. James glared at him for a moment, still wondering what it was he was up to before turning back to his own work.

---

Hardly waiting for Peter, James made for the Great Hall quickly. When he saw Sirius sitting at the table, alone, he rushed over "Sirius!"

Sirius looked up and forced a smile when he sat down "Doin' alright James? Side not hurting?"

James shook his head "It's fine."

Peter gasped slightly when he caught up, sitting on the opposite side "I…I said slow down James!"

But James ignored him and kept his focus on Sirius "Is it true?"

Sirius didn't need to ask what, he'd been being asked all day if 'it were true'. He sighed "Yes, yes. I snapped at Ronts."

"And you're kicked out of school?!" Peter asked in alarm.

He frowned "What? No! I just got detention that's all. I have to do it later today when we've got free hour."

James visibly relaxed "Oh…ok…I just wanted to make sure, people were talking in my class."

Sirius scoffed "Gossipers…honestly, how does detention turn into expulsion?"

James chuckled slightly, finding it easier to laugh now that he was sure that the rumor was somewhat false "Got me."

"Hey guys."

Peter ducked slightly "Seri! Er…h-hi…"

She didn't seem to notice Peter as she sat next to him; instead she glared at Sirius from their side of the table "Sirius-"

"YES! Yes already, ok, I yelled at Ronts! I'm not expelled but got detention, lost Gryffindor points and probably won't be able to hold a casual conversation with her ever again, that's it!" he snapped annoyedly.

Seri blinked "Oh…er, ok. Sorry. I wasn't even going to ask about that but…well never mind, we can talk later." As she said this she reached for a plate closer to Peter's side.

Peter cast her a bashful look out of the corner of his eye but said nothing.

James grinned "So uh, Seri…d'you know Pete has the full set of chocolate frog cards?"

Peter looked up at his name "What?"

Seri smiled "You do? Oh, I've got the hardest time trying to get them _all_. I'm missing Finiush Blerk and a few others, but him mostly. I just can't seem to find him anywhere."

Peter hesitated for a moment "W-well, you should really look for the frogs in the back of the store, those a-are the ones that usually have the rare cards." He said sheepishly.

Seri's smile widened "Really?"

He nodded "Y-yeah. And, if you try this store, in Diagon Alley…"

As the two went into more detail on that, Sirius gave James a soft punch in the arm "Nice one, match-maker."

James shrugged "You could see Pete's crush from a mile away. Just a little push is all I did."

The word's 'a little push' triggered something in his brain and he remembered something else he was going to ask Sirius, "Oh, by the way…about Snivellus. Remember how you said he may be onto us? Well-"

"Hi James!" Lily said cheerfully, kissing his cheek as she sat next to him.

James looked up and smiled at her "Ah Eves, you just get prettier every time I see you."

Lily giggled "Oh stop."

Sirius sighed and began to stand up "Well, if you're all going to be lovey-dovey here, I'll catch you later."

James quickly looked back at him "But about Snape-"

"We can talk later. Ronts has been giving me that ugly look ever since I walked in. Probably has a poison or something ready for me. I better get. See ya around." He said casually, throwing his bag over his shoulder and heading out.

Lily frowned slightly as he left "What was that about Severus?"

James blinked "What? Oh, uhhh…"

She let out an exasperated sigh "James, you _promised_ you'd lay off him."

"I have! It's just…well…I think he might know about Remus'…condition."

Lily scoffed "Don't be ridiculous. He can't know."

James sighed "Yeah, I guess…"

"_I mean, I hope…_"

---

"Remus, come on, time to get up." A voice said briskly in his ear.

Remus groaned and rolled over "Can't. To sleepy…" he murmured.

Madam Pomfrey put a hand on her hip "Oh for heaven's sake. Remus, you've been sleeping all day, it's time to go."

Unwillingly, he forced his eyes open "Go? Where?"

She rolled her eyes and pointed at the sky where the sun was beginning to set.

Remus blinked and stared at the setting sun for a while before realization hit him, and hard. He groaned and buried his face in the pillow "Oh right, _that_…"

She nodded "That's right. So up, up, up! We have to get you in there before the sun sets."

Remus yawned widely and sat up "Right, right…"

Though he was always reluctant during this time, for some reason he couldn't really explain, he was especially reluctant to go tonight…

---

In the Gryffindor common room, most of the Gryffindors were in bed or at least off to bed as the clock showed to be almost 12 o'clock.

James finished up his chess game with Peter, saying a mighty "Check mate!" and standing up triumphantly.

"Well, good game Wormtail but once more, I, am victorious." He said proudly.

Lily scoffed, not looking up from the book she was reading on the couch "Don't talk so much or all that air in your head will escape."

James grinned "Aw, I'm just messin' around! Well, I'll be back, I just wanna make sure Rem's ok."

At this Lily, Peter and Sirius, who'd been working on an essay, looked up at him in alarm.

James blinked "What?"

"Are you sure that's such a good idea James?" Lily asked softly.

Peter nodded nervously "Yeah, I mean, after what happened with the wolf just yesterday…don't you think you should give him a chance to cool down first?"

"And you're healing might stop if you stress it to much." Sirius added.

James put a defensive hand up "Relax guys! I didn't say I'd STAY there! I'm just going to check in to see if Remus made it there alright and that he's ok."

Peter still looked uneasy and Sirius frowned at that.

"Kay. Just bring back an arm if there's one left." He said, turning back to his paper.

James gave him a questioning look "What do you mean?"

Sirius smirked "Get this; you know how Snivellus is always sticking his huge nose in and wondering about the werewolf thing? Well, I told him if he wanted to find out so bad, to go there. Can you imagine what that'll be like? I'd go to watch but I have this essay due-"

"YOU **WHAT?!?**" chorused Lily, James and Peter.

Sirius blinked "Hm?"

James frowned and ran to the door, only saying "You IDIOT!" before slamming it behind him, ignoring Lily who yelled at him not to go. He ran as fast as he could, pain instantly hitting his side as he did.

But pain was the last thing on his mind as he ran to the Whomping Willow.

---

Severus Snape made his way silently and stealthfully out of Slytherin chamber and was out of the castle in only a few minutes time. The cool whip of wind felt nice and though a dark cloud covered most of it, bits of moonlight came from the sky and the stars twinkled brightly overhead.

Inwardly he smiled "I must remember to do this more often." He murmured.

It was indeed a peaceful night…but he knew something was a miss and as though reading his thoughts, the dark cloud seemed to suddenly engulf the moon completely. He took quick strides to the Whomping Willow.

He'd had a few ideas of what it could have been but it had something to do with Lupin. One insane idea was maybe, (scoff) he was a werewolf or something but…ha, that was stupid. No person in the right mind would allow a werewolf to be around so many students it could feed on…unless Dumbledore didn't _know_. But how could he not?

No, no, the whole werewolf theory was out. It was just dumb, even for Dumbledore.

He's most recent idea was that they were doing something illegal. It was for the sake of all the students he found out what it was an expose them, those 'Marauders' as they liked to call themselves. Also…he'd never pass up a chance to get Potter out of school.

"_After he stole my Lily…_" he thought bitterly.

Fueled by his rage, he quickened his pace until he came to the tree.

As usual, the Whomping Willow thrashed angrily at so much as the slightest movement. Severus looked around for a moment until he found a large branch. Not to large, but large enough.

He cautiously inched towards the tree…if Black had lied then he'd have to remember to kill him later…if he survived that is. Biting his lower lip with anticipation, he prodded the knot at the root of the tree.

Abruptly, the tree stopped its thrashing and was still. Not even a leaf twitched, or fell from the tree…it was as if it were petrified.

Somewhat surprised, Severus walked closer, sure to keep the branch on the knot. He had half expected Black to be lying, wanting no doubt to get him killed.

At the roots of a tree there was indeed a tunnel, once more, Black was telling the truth.

"…I think I'm about to uncover something big…" he muttered, crouching down to the hole abandoning the stick now that he was out of the branches reach.

---

He'd just slipped into the tunnel when James made his way up.

"No! Snape…ah, wait!" he panted, holding his side.

Sirius wasn't joking about the healing process if he added stress. He was running as fast as he could and the wound in his side stung almost as bad as it had when he'd first gotten it.

He grabbed the abandoned stick and poked the knot, making the Willow still once more and went after him.

---

Severus wasn't exactly sure _where_ he was going and he'd lit his wand to see the pathway…it was a long way down. In the dark it was easy to lose track of time, he was soon wondering how long he'd been down there.

Just as his knees began to ache terribly, he saw the end of the tunnel. He smirked "At last…now, what is Lupin up to…" he murmured, pushing the half-open door open all the way, his wand pointed out defensively.

---

Remus jumped to his feet at the sound of the door opening. He'd been sitting in the living room, thinking. A large cloud covered the moon at the moment so he was safe, however, clouds don't remain.

He gasped "Severus! What are you doing here?"

Snape smirked horribly "I knew you were up to something. Now, you're going to tell me what exactly you're up to or I'll hex you into oblivion."

Remus' face was one of worry, but it wasn't directed at Snape, it was at the window where the clouds moved and threatened to show the full moon. He swallowed hard "Severus, you don't understand…please, you MUST get out of here!" he said desperately, taking a step forward but instantly taking two back as Snape thrust his wand out.

"I don't think you're really in any position to be giving orders, Lupin. It was rather foolish of you to come up here without a wand! I'll say it again, what are you up to?" He hissed.

Before Remus could so much as open his mouth the door burst open again.

"_Expelliarmus!_" he shouted, getting James' wand in his free hand.

James held his hands over his head "Easy Snape. Come on, we have to get out of here before-"

"Not until I know what's going on! Lupin's up to something, right under Dumbledore's nose and I want to know what…" he said darkly.

Remus gasped "Oh no." the clouds began to fade and the giant orb that was the moon began coming into view. He's breathing went ridged "J-J-James! G-get out, now!" he struggled to say, staggering away from them slightly, squeezing his head.

James nodded and made to grab Snape's arm but stopped short when both wands were pointed at him. Snape stared at Remus in astonishment, a look of bewilder on his face.

Remus let out a yell of pain and clenched his midsection, hunching over. His spin seemed to be rearranging and he stayed down. He clenched his teeth tightly and was huffing air out his nose. His pupils dilated and his eyes turned yellow.

Snape was completely transfixed on the transformation; he'd never seen anything like it. Neither had James, but he knew better then to just stand and watch.

"Snape, come on!" he said, reaching for his arm once more.

More screams of agony came from Remus as his very bones changed. His tawny hair darkened to a deep shade of brown and grew all over his face, his nose stretched to a snout. He opened his mouth once more "AaaRRRGGGHHH!! G-get **OOOOOUT!!!**" His voice changed halfway through the sentence. His voice distorted into a sort of snarling, deep root noise.

A snarling wolf stared back at the two humans now and didn't hesitate to charge at them.

Snape's eyes widened and he pointed both wands at the wolf.

"NO!" James shouted, pulling Snape back.

Two red jets of light shot at the ceiling. The wolf looked up for a moment before continuing towards them. Snape panicked, for the first time ever all his thoughts left him…

James grabbed the back of his robes and pushed him to the door "Get out- AGH!" the wolf scratched him hard on the back but before he could sink his teeth in any of his flesh, James kicked his snout.

The wolf yelped and pulled back, giving James enough time to race to the door. Once he and Snape were out he slammed it shut, grabbed his wand from Snape and quickly locked the door.

Just in time, for once he had vicious snarls and clawing at the door could be heard.

For a moment that was all that could be heard. Snape stared at the door in utter shock, his eyes wider then James had ever seen them…pounding added to the noise, he seemed to be slamming all his weight into the door now.

James panted "Come on…let's get out of here…"

Snape wordlessly followed as James led the way out of the tunnel. It was completely silent as they made their way out of the tunnel. The blood dripped from his back and pooled around his feet.

James winced; he could feel the dirt from above getting into his open wound but didn't dare stop moving forward.

"_Great, as if I don't have ENOUGH injuries. Lily's gonna freak…_" he thought as they went along.

Finally they came to the end of the tunnel and away from the Willow. It wasn't until they were out of harm's way completely that Snape found his voice "Potter…I don't know how you did it…hiding a werewolf, here…"

James sighed, "Snape, it's not what you think-"

"Dumbledore must be informed…you've endangered everyone, you fool! Look what just happened to you! Lupin must be expelled, for all our sakes." He said quickly, making his way back to the castle.

James followed but at a slower pass "Snape you idiot, don't you get it?!"

But he was already out of ear-shot and was soon at the castle door. James had stopped trying to catch him at this point and just walked to door at normal, if not a slower, speed.

James sighed "Dumbledore already knows…genius…" he muttered. His eyes began to close and he swayed in his spot…quickly he shook his head "Nope, gotta stay awake…least till I get inside…" he told himself, urging himself onward.

As he came up to the castle he was sure to wipe his feet. The last thing he needed was to run into Filch.

"_Add screaming to injure, no thanks._" he thought as he walked down the hall, hoping that the blood on his back seeped into his cloths instead of on the floor.

---

End A/N: HI! Ok, now I know what some of you Snape fans are thinking. To answer your question, no, I don't think Snape is dim. However, if I'd given him more understanding on the situation that'd mean I'd have to make him a bigger part of the story and well…he's not. Sorry. I know his character's flat but it's SUPPOSE to be, because he's NOT a big character. I just had to have the prank happen for the story to progress and Snape was a part of that soooo, yeah. I had to have him, I didn't make him flashy, but he was there. Kay? Maybe in another fic I could go into more depth with him but in this one he's just not a big enough character for that. Ok. Now that I've got that out of the way, I hope you enjoyed this chap, the next one is a good one, trust me. Review please…if any of you are still there that is.


	29. Chapter 29

**Accidents Happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Ok, look, let just drop it. You're right, I'm right, he's right, she's right, WHATEVER! Just…I don't want to start a war with this moon thing, kay? Please, no more. It's fiction guys. If it makes you feel better I'll say I was wrong, you were right and I'm stupid. Kay? Will that stop this? I hope so. KAY! Now that we've got that out of the way, I'm SOOO sorry! I've had to take extra tutoring (thanks to my math teacher who thinks I'm lacking horribly, grrr) so I haven't gotten to get on the computer, let alone the net, in a LONG time. Sorry! So, without further delay, here's chapter 29! Hope you guys enjoy:)

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam, Seri and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, they're probably mine.

**Chapter 29**

Even before he opened his eyes his muscles started pulsing painfully. He groaned but stayed flat on his back and didn't move. If he could put waking up off as long as possible, maybe the pain would lessen.

However, the world seemed to hate him at the moment as an annoying fly buzzed around his face, landing on his nose. Remus frowned, but never the less forced his hand to his face, eyes still closed and swatted the fly off, his fingers barely touching his nose.

But that little touch was just enough for him to feel something on his finger tips…something sort of sticky…it smelt weird, like-

With a gasp he opened his eyes, the hand still to his face and saw the drying blood on his fingertips. That was all it took for his brain to jumpstart and he remember what happened last night. Startled, he forced himself to sit and looked around worriedly, praying there was no dead body around, pleading that James and Snape had gotten out.

The last thing he remembered was yelling at them to leave and the usual pains of his transformation and then the rest…darkness.

From his direct vision he didn't see any bodies…but then, the wolf could have easily dragged their bodies out of this room, torn them apart and left the remains scattered throughout the house.

Panic started to grow in his chest as he felt around his lips and tasted the inside of his mouth…what if he'd…no…not again…

His breathing went shaky at the thought as he tried to stand up "No…please…j-JAMES! James! Severus? Are you in here?! Are…are you…still alive?" he propped himself against the wall to get a better look of the room.

He got no answer…he could have try to go into the kitchen to look for them, but his body shook terribly even with the wall to support him. The sudden movement to his feet gave him a terrible head-rush onto of the usual pain. He grabbed his head and slowly sank to the floor, his back still against the wall as an awful feeling setting in his stomach.

"Oh James…if I killed you I…I'll never forgive myself…" he whispered miserably.

Suddenly the door opened and in came Lily and behind her, to his great relieve, was James.

His eyes widened and, ignoring the searing pain it sent through his system, he scrambled to his feet. "James, thank _god_! I…I thought I killed you!" he said hoarsely, hugging him as best he could with his soar arms.

James blinked in surprise "Er…yeah…why would you think that?"

Despite himself, Remus felt his throat thicken "The last thing I remember is telling you and Snape to get and…and then I woke up with…with blood, on my hand…"

James' eyes widened "_Oh_! Oh no, no, you just scratched my back, that's all! Honest, I'm ok…I went to Madam Pomfrey and everything this time. Now that I had Snape as an excuse, our Animagi secret is still safe."

Remus closed his eyes in relief…but it didn't last as the rest of his brain caught up.

He swallowed hard "But now Snape knows, what if he-"

To his surprise James laughed "Oh, you don't have to worry about that. Dumbledore made him promise not to tell…heh, he musta felt stupid, going up to tell Dumbledore what he already knew…haha, he was so embarrassed this morning his usual scowl was accompanied by a blush! Hahaha!"

Lily gave him a reproachful look "James."

Remus didn't find humor in it though "How can we be sure he'll keep his mouth shut?"

James grinned "Don't worry! By the look on Snape's face I'm _positive_ he won't breathe a word."

Remus sighed "If you say so." Though in the back of his mind, he felt unbelieving of that. It probably wouldn't be today or even the next day, but he felt that _some_day, Snape would tell.

James grinned "Come on, maybe if he sees you his face'll get even redder!"

Lily frowned "James, be nice! Honestly, this whole ordeal must be so embarrassing for him, having Sirius trick him like that-"

The statement took Remus mind of Snape and back to the conversation "What was that?"

James' eyes widened and Lily covered her mouth "Oh! I…er…James I thought you said he knew." She whispered angrily to James.

He shook his head "I said I'd tell him…eventually…when he was feeling better…"

Remus frowned "What're you talking about?"

Lily clasped her hands behind her back "Oh, just…something…"

James nodded but said nothing.

They're uneasy behavior didn't help his suspicion "Oh come on, just tell me what you're talking about." he said impatiently. They both glanced at each other for a moment.

Lily made a few facial cues and then James cleared his throat "Uh, well…don't shot the messengers now but…well, the only reason Snape came was because Sirius tricked him into it…he didn't tell him you were a, well you know, but…he told him how to get here and…"

As James spoke a flame started in Remus' gut…it slowly grew bigger and bigger. His growing anger gave strength to his weakened muscles and he stood straighter.

"Where is he?" Remus asked in a surprisingly calm voice.

James glanced at Lily "Er, well…he wasn't awake when I left so…maybe still in the common room-"

That was all the information he needed. The soreness of his muscle seemed dulled by rage as he went out the door; James and Lily at his heels, insisting he should be laying down or at least wait until Madam Pomfrey had seen him.

But he was beyond the physical pain now.

It was time to settle the score.

---

Sirius had just gotten out of the shower and was putting his shoes on.

"I still say you went too far though with that joke, Snape could've really been hurt o-or killed!" Peter said as he got his book-bag.

Sirius frowned "I know, I know! And I apologized already, but it's not like he did, right? If anything, _James_ is the one who got the raw-end of the deal."

As Peter was about to respond he was cut off by the door opening forcefully, by a very angry looking Remus with Lily and James almost timidly behind him.

Sirius didn't blame them for being so. Remus' eyes were narrowed into a heated glare and though he was hunched and limped slightly as he entered, he had an intimidating air about him.

All was still in the room after they'd come in and the longer the stillness last, the more the tension grew.

Their eyes locked and Sirius felt a shiver down his spine. He'd never really seen Remus angry before…he was the calm, collective one who rarely lost his composure.

"So, you think it's _funny_ to put people's _lives_ in danger?" Remus finally spoke in a calmly furious (1) tone.

Sirius swallowed but said nothing, not really knowing whether he should answer or if it was a rhetorical question.

Remus stepped closer, his eyes still narrowed "It _amuses_ you that I could have turned Snape into a werewolf or worse, killed him?! And James?!?"

Sirius looked at his feet "I…I wasn't really thinking, to much of it…at the time…" he murmured to the ground. Though he could no longer see the heated glare, he could _feel_ Remus' eyes digging into his head.

Remus frowned deeply "You weren't thinking?! That very morning you'd just bitten my head off for not thinking and then you go and do the same?! Brilliant Sirius! What the hell's wrong with you?! Do you know what it's like waking up with blood on you and not knowing what you did?!"

Sirius looked up, his nerve returning to him "Not so pleasant is it? Waking up and not knowing what the hell was going on…"

Remus balled his hands into fists "DON'T COMPARE US, THIS IS ENTIRELY DIFFERENT!!! You woke up with a scar, you weren't dead. **I** woke up with **BLOOD** on my hands!! I WAS WORRIED I'D **KILLED** SOMEONE!!! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT THAT'S LIKE?!"

He didn't respond to that.

Remus frowned and his voice lowered "I'm not sure if you remember, but I told you once…Sirius it's not funny, what you did…you really wanted Snape to die? Is that what you wanted?"

Sirius didn't meet his eye and kept his mouth closed.

Remus took another step forward "IS IT?!"

"NO! I was just…(sigh)…I was angry, and that bloody idiot wouldn't leave me alone! I just, need some time to think, just to be alone and Snape…I didn't think he'd actually do it! I thought he'd think I was lying!" Sirius confessed, still meeting no one's eye.

Remus scowled "Are you sure? Are you sure you just didn't want to see him die?! To have me kill him and have that eat away at my conscience forever, to get back at me?!"

Sirius looked up at that "What?"

"Don't play coy with me! You probably did remember, when I told you about the girl I killed as a werewolf. I told you how much it hurt, how much I hated myself for it, I still do…you knew it'd be the perfect way to punish me, to put another dead body over my head!!"

At that no one spoke. Lily had put her hands over her mouth in a silent gasp while James and Peter stared at him in utter bewilderment, but they went unnoticed.

Sirius stared at him in surprise but his voice had left him.

Remus' frown still remained as cold as ever, even as he turned his back to walk out "I think I was wrong about you Sirius, and so was you're mother…" he paused and glanced over his shoulder to meet his eye "If this is how you get your sick kicks, you **ARE** worthy of the name Black…"

His gray eyes widened and a pained look crossed his face at the sting of that.

THAT was low.

But it went unseen by Remus, who'd turned around and hobbled to the door "I'll see Madam Pomfrey now. Could you help me get downstairs James?" he asked softly.

James stood in his spot for a moment, as though in a trance but quickly shook his head "Er, yeah, course." and went to his side to help him stand straighter.

Sirius watched them leave, anger starting to gloss over his shocked and hurt expression. Lily mouthed 'sorry' and followed after James and Remus. Peter, however, stayed.

He cautiously approached him "…Do you-"

"No. Just leave…" Sirius murmured, his eyes traveling to the floor.

Peter nodded and followed them out the door.

For a moment he stood there, looking down at his bag that was by his feet.

Remus words were still taking their sweet time setting in, except his closing remark that still stung, though now invoked rage rather then hurt.

…'Worthy of the name Black'…

He gritted his teeth angrily and kicked the bag clear to the other side of the room, causing books, parchments and quills to fly out, a small smash let him know his ink bottle had broken on impact with the ground, but he didn't care.

"And what the hell give you the right to judge me?!" he snarled in response, though he knew the time for it had passed.

Blood pounded in his ears and he wanted nothing more then to kick the bag with all its contents again and again until the books within fell apart, but he resisted the urge to do so, acknowledging the throbbing of his foot.

He pulled his wand out of his robes and pointed it at the mess of his bag. Non-verbals sure were useful…the clattered mess and broken ink bottle went back into the bag neatly and unbroken.

Once all was in order he plopped back on his bed and stared up at the ceiling. The rage was dying, but not yet dead and slowly, pain and remorse took the place of it…he'd rather be angry then feel like crap.

His gray eyes started to feel dry as he continued to look up at nothing "He's right…old mum sure would be proud of me right now…" he bit the inside of his mouth angrily, hard enough to taste blood "…Damn it…"

---

Once Madam Pomfrey gave him her little pain lifting potion she insisted he sleep a while. He agreed to sleep but not in the hospital wing. After helping him to the hospital wing, James and the rest went to breakfast but he knew they'd come back to check on him once they were through.

Right now, sleep was what he wanted, but he also wanted to be alone.

And he knew just where to go.

"Really Madam Pomfrey, I can make it back to Gryffindor tower without help." He said for the umpteenth time as he made for the door. "Thanks for the potion, it really helps." He added.

And it was true.

In fact, he probably wouldn't be able to make it to the 7th floor if it wasn't such an effective pain-reliever. He doubted anyone else knew about the secret room (as he'd been calling it) and remembered the nice bed it had last time he was there.

He frowned at the thought "A time better forgotten."

What Sirius had done really hurt him. How could he talk about being used and then go and use him to get rid of Snape? Such a hypocrite! What's worse, if James hadn't stopped him, as he'd said, he'd have another dead body hanging over his head.

He closed his eyes at that "_Even if it's Snape, I don't want to kill anyone…I don't want to see a murderer looking at me when I look in the mirror…I don't want to see blood stains on my hands…I can't bare it…_"

How could Sirius be so thoughtless?

True, he'd done a bad thing but do two wrongs really make a right? Especially when the second wrong is even worse then the first one? No, he didn't think so. And yes, what he'd said to Sirius was harsh but he deserved it, maybe that'd take some of the arrogance out of his laugh.

---

Sirius, against his first impulse, went down to breakfast, though he mostly just picked moodily at his food. James had silently advised Lily and Peter not to talk to him about it and he was grateful that he did.

James really was his best mate.

Inwardly he cringed "_Never gonna be able to say __that__ word the same again…_" he thought, correcting the 'm' word with friend.

After this whole thing with Remus, he doubted anything would be the same again…he was also a bit surprised. Apparently being his…'mate' or whatever didn't mean he was spared if Remus ever got angry.

Those words…he'd be thinking about them all day at this rate…at the moment he felt so horrible, he wanted nothing more then to apologize and get it over with…but, something, probably pride, held him back from it.

He sighed and abandoned his fork.

No different then usual, Seri came into the Great Hall and sat with her favorite Gryffindors "Hey guys." She said cheerfully, sitting next to Peter, not noticing as he squirmed a bit.

They all gave a somewhat quiet reply.

She frowned slightly "Wow guys, why so down?"

Sirius sighed heavily "Nothing…"

"Oh right, it's just depressive Gryffindor day, I almost forgot." Seri said as she grabbed a plate.

James smiled slightly "Yep, so you're not allowed to participate."

Seri snapped her fingers in mock disappointment "Oh darn my luck."

Peter snickered softly.

She gave Sirius a look "Really, what's up?"

"Oh, we're all a bit worried about the teams up coming game with Hufflepuff." James said quickly.

Seri raised an eyebrow "Since when was Hufflepuff threatening?"

"Since…they got…a new, captain or…you know…" he said, trailing off slightly.

Seri smiled "Ah…right…well, I'm sure it'll be fine, it's just a game after all. Nothin' a bit of practice can't help right?"

James nodded "Right."

"Well, at least I know what's bothering _you_. Sirius, what's wrong?"

Abruptly he got up and pulled his book-bag over his shoulder, not meeting anyone's eye "I'm going to class early. See you guys later."

Seri frowned "Hm…ok Sirius, you can run, but you can't hide…"

---

Seri wasn't joking.

All through passing periods she'd show up unexpectedly and start a game of 20 questions.

"Did you hurt yourself? Lose money? Didn't finish your homework? Worried about exams? Miss out on something fun? Get your cloths wreaked? Forgot to take a shower? Have a bad night's sleep? Stomach ache? Tooth ache? Foot ache? Head trauma? Bee stung you?" was just a sample of the things she'd ask.

Every time she showed up Sirius gave her the same response: "I appreciate that you care and all but I'm fine. So go away." And it got more and more annoyed each time he had to say it.

Well, not only did it NOT stop Seri from asking him what was wrong, it made her ask even MORE! In fact, she was even waiting outside his class that came just before their free hour.

"Come on Sirius, I can keep it up all day, it's easier if you just tell me what's wrong." She said tauntingly.

As nice as she was, she could get annoying!

Sirius rolled his eyes and started down the hall "Drop it Seri."

"You've got a head cold?"

"No."

"You feel queasy?"

"No."

"You stubbed your toe?"

"No!"

"You hit your head?"

"No."

"You lost an important paper?"

"Nooo."

"You ate some bad soup?"

"No."

"Ate bad meat?"

"No!"

"Having gas problems?"

"NO!"

"Put your finger in an electric outlet?"

He stopped walking and turned to face her "N- wait, what the hell's an electric outlet?"

She smiled embarrassedly "Op! Sorry, muggle thing. They use them to get out power, kinda like wands only…not…"

Sirius frowned "Seri, this is getting dumb, could you just leave me alone?"

"No! I wanna help you!"

He stared at her for a moment then sighed "You really wanna help me?"

She nodded eagerly "Yeah! You're like family to me!"

He smiled slightly "Ok, here's how you can help me. Lean in, it's a secret…"

As Seri leaned up a bit the smile on Sirius face vanished and he yelled "**STOP TRYING TO HELP ME!!**"

Seri was temporarily stunned by the sudden shout in her ear and it gave Sirius just enough time to escape. He knew he didn't have long before she was after him again so he bolted as fast as he could down the hall, not really seeing where he was going.

"_Gotta hide, gotta hide!_" he thought as he ran.

"SIRIUS GET BACK HERE!!!" Seri shouted as she chased after him.

"I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP!" he shouted back.

"OH I'M NOT GONNA HELP YOU NOW, I'M GONNA HEX THE DAYLIGHTS OUT OF YOU FOR SCREAMING IN MY EAR!!!" was her angry reply, which made run faster, not caring who he had to push or run into to get away.

He quickly turned a corner and ran up three flights of stairs. He kept running for a good 10 minutes or so, until all the stairways and corridors looked exactly the same, which made him stop to see where he was.

"Wait…there's the portrait of those three lovely witches…the old warlock with a cane…three knights facing east…Huh, 7th floor I think…" he whispered to himself just barely, nearly out of breath.

_-Flashback-_

_It was Filch._

"_Cloak." Both Remus and Sirius said._

_Sirius pulled the IC out while Remus took off his shoes._

"_Invisible or not our tracks aren't." he muttered._

_Both carried their shoes as they ran blindly to the stairs, Filch always appeared a bit away._

"_Why does he have to know all the secrete passages to?!" Sirius muttered angrily as they took a quick turn in hopes to lose him._

_Remus looked around as they went "Looks like we're on the 7th floor…" he whispered._

"_And here comes Flitch!"_

"_-Those damn students…I've got them now! I may be able to use the whips again or lock 'em up by their thumbs!" he cackled._

_Remus looked around the hall anxiously…suddenly a door appeared on the side of the wall that wasn't there before. Sirius glanced at in surprise but before he could even wonder where it came from Remus opened the door._

"_Quick, in there!" he said, pushing Sirius into the room and slamming the door behind them. Once inside Remus put his ear to the door and strained his ear to hear what was going on outside._

"_Hm…where are they?! I heard a door slam! Grrr…must be around somewhere…think they can fool me?! HA! I'll show them! I'll patrol this hallway ALL NIGHT if I have to!" they both heard Filch snarl._

_Remus groaned and put his hands through his hair angrily "Great! Just…perfect! No wands, no magic…Filch roaming the halls! Well get comfortable Sirius because we're probably gonna have to sleep here! Ugh…if only there was a cot or something…we need a bed of some kind!"_

_Just as he said that some candles in the back of the room flickered on, revealing a bed big enough for at least 5 people._

_Remus blinked "Wow…that was…convenient…"_

_Sirius chuckled and walked over to the bed where he sat at the edge and started wringing his cloak out "I'll say. I'm surprised the IC didn't get soaked too! That was a close- OW! Hey!"_

_Remus had thrown one of his shoes at him "YOU IDIOT!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?! Angering those centaurs…YOU ALMOST GOT US KILLED!!"_

_Sirius ducked the other incoming shoe then looked up angrily to argue but one look at Remus made his anger melt away. He nearly jumped to his feet when he caught sight of it "Rem…you're hurt!"_

_This was the first time since the forest he'd actually looked at Remus. He was soaked from head to toe in his pajamas, shivering and holding his left shoulder with his right hand, covering up his bleeding._

_But Remus didn't seem moved by his concern as he said "It's just a scratch and don't chance the subject! You know what they're like, why didn't you just keep your big mouth shut?!"_

_Sirius frowned "They shouldn't have said that stuff about you! They don't even know you!"_

"_THAT'S NOT THE POINT! Sirius, they're just words! Don't you think I'm use to that by now?! There's no hiding it! When I'm older that's all I'll EVER hear and you think getting in fights about it is gonna make it any better?! I probably won't be able to get a JOB! Shunned! Don't you think…I should be…u-used to words like that by now?!" he shouted, though his voice faltered slightly._

_Sirius frowned "You didn't seem so use to it a moment ago…fact, it sound like it really tore you up inside."_

_Remus sighed "Of course it does…but you shouldn't just act on your emotions! That's really stupid! We almost died! You just have to put up a good front and pretend it doesn't hurt you! I do it all the time anyway…"_

_It was silent for a while after that. _

_Sirius stared at Remus for a long time but Remus looked away. When Remus didn't meet his eye Sirius turned his attention to the shoulder he was holding. The wound didn't look like it was bleeding that much, but with all that it was introduced to, it could probably get an infection if it wasn't looked at._

"_Take off your shirt." Sirius said unthinkingly._

_Remus looked up in so much alarm his eyebrows nearly got lost in his hair._

_Sirius gave him an annoyed look "I need to look at your shoulder."_

_He nodded slowly "Yeah…course…"_

_Still shivering he unbuttoned his pajama top and sat at the edge of the bed next to Sirius. Sirius looked closely at the gash that was still bleeding. He moved Remus arm up and down and to both sides, making him wince slightly._

"_Hmmm…doesn't look too bad…hold on, I'll go look for a first aid kit." Sirius said, getting up._

_Remus nodded and Sirius walked until he was out of view._

_He sighed and walked around the dark room that looked virtually empty "Ok…first aid kit, first aid kit…I need a first aid kit, not something fancy but-"_

_No sooner than when the words left his mouth did a candle suddenly light and he saw 5 first aid kits neatly stacked on a shelf. He blinked in surprise as he approached them and for a moment he just stared at them…then, he slowly reached out and grabbed the first one…they were real!_

"_Wow…what a cool room…hm, I guess if you need something, all you have to do is say it or think about how badly you need it…that's probably how Rem found the room to begin with…" Sirius said with a smile._

_Shrugged, he took the first aid kit of the shelf and back to the center of the room where Remus sat on the bed, looking around._

-_Flashback ends_-

He shook his head when the picture-show in his head stopped. That was another unexpected one that didn't show any signs of why he just remembered it.

"Centaurs? When the hell was that?!" he said aloud, but soon wished he hadn't.

"Sirius?! I CAN HEAR YOU UP THERE!!" Seri's voice shouted from a lower level.

He bit his lip to keep from anymore speaking and walked around, feeling the walls and thinking as hard as he could "_I need that room Remus and I hid in! When we ran from Filch or whatever…that one room, the hiding room! I need a place to hide, that one room!_"

Just as it seemed like it wasn't going to work and he felt stupid for even trying it, a door suddenly appeared, just as it had in his lost memory. He smiled "Yes!"

Seri sounded around the corner "Sirius? I'm gonna get you!"

Quickly he opened the door and slammed it behind him. That was the fourth time in one day he regretted doing something. His slamming the door made the other person in the room wake up.

---

Remus grunted slightly at the sudden noise. It wasn't like he was dreaming of anything, but it was still a comfortable sleep that took him hours to get to that was disrupted and most of all, it was by the last person he wanted to see.

He yawned and sat up sleepily; rubbing his eyes…he blinked a few times then looked back at the door. His brain took a moment to turn on but when it did he frowned, "Sirius-"

Before he could get another word out Sirius ran up to him and covered his mouth with his hand "Shhh!"

Remus was quiet for a moment; long enough to hear what he was hiding from.

"When I find you Sirius you better know the way to the hospital wing 'cuz I'm going to send you there in pieces!!" Seri's anger voice came muffled through the door.

Sirius stood there covering his mouth until it sounded like Seri had passed. Remus was not in the mood to wait for him to leave and unexpectedly bit the palm that covered his mouth.

Sirius quickly pulled it back "Ow! Geez…don't you think you've bitten me enough for one year?!" he snapped.

"I don't know, you put enough people's lives in jeopardy for one year?" Remus shot back.

Sirius made a strangling motion in the air "Would you just…SHHH! Please! Could we put this fight on hold, just for a moment?"

"Sirius? I know you're around here somewhere!" came from the other end of the door.

Remus glared at him heatedly, it'd serve him right to get caught by Seri and beat up for…whatever it was he did to make her mad…but, some insane little voice told him to be nice…the little voice was called sympathy.

"_You don't really wanna start a war with Sirius; just give him the chance to apologize at least…look at him! Don't rat him out, what kind of friend would do that?_"

All these were true so, Remus crossed his arm and turned his back but said nothing. Sirius grinned and a looked relieved, mouthing 'thank you'. Remus bit back a smile, why were Sirius' smiles so contagious?

Though he was mad at him right now, he couldn't help but notice how nice he smelt, his company seemed to bring a little peace of mind, though that was overridden by his stubborn anger.

They stayed silent until they heard Seri murmur "Hm…maybe he wasn't here…it was probably the 8th floor…yeah, I'll check there!" and heard the fading footsteps.

Sirius smiled "Phew! Thanks Remus, I owe you one…"

"More then one, I'm sure." He muttered.

Sirius frowned and opened his mouth to reply…but slowly closed it. He scoffed and walked to the door "Never mind…"

"_Stop being such a jerk! You're never gonna make up that way!_"

"_I'm trying but…grh, I'm still so angry!_" he told the little voice.

"_So let it go! Do you really want to lose one of your closest friends over something so stupid?!_"

"_A real friend wouldn't do something like that! And a real friend would know when to apologize!_"

"Look, Remus…" Sirius said suddenly.

Remus looked over his shoulder to see that he'd stopped at the door.

Sirius sighed and turned back around "I'm not really one to apologize but…I know what I did was…was awful. There's no excuse I could use to make up for it…I'm sorry. I really am and I'm not just saying that. I wasn't really thinking about how it'd affect you…I was an asshole, ok? Can we just stop this already? I'm sick of fighting with one of my best friends…"

Remus' arms slowly loosened though he still had his back to Sirius.

"…_You were saying? Mr. Jerk?_"

Remus bit his lip for a moment, then slowly turned back around "Yeah…I guess…I wasn't all that nice about anything either…I left you in the dark on something that concerned you the most…I was no better….I'm sorry to…"

Sirius smiled slightly "Well that's good to know."

Remus nodded "Yeah…"

It was quiet for a while. They were able to look at each other now, but it was still somewhat awkward.

"…Even still, that last one really hurt…" Sirius muttered unexpectedly.

Remus blinked "Hm?"

Sirius walked to the edge of the bed "…'You ARE worthy of the name Black'…"

Remus looked down "Oh that…yeah, that was uncalled for, I must have sounded like a total ass."

"Low blow, to say the least…yeah, you kinda did." Sirius said, sitting on the bed.

Remus frowned slightly "You don't have to agree."

Sirius grinned "I know."

Remus scoffed and rolled his eyes, though this time he smiled…it felt like old times.

"…So, would you mind maybe…taking it back?" Sirius said slowly.

Remus blinked "What? The worthy thing?"

Sirius nodded solemnly "Yes. I'm not joking, that's been bugging me all day…especially to hear it from a friend like you, I musta really screwed up. Please…"

The sincere pleading in his voice also proved how badly this was bothering him…and his eyes…Remus looked away, damn! His eyes got him every time!

Remus sighed "Oh alright, I honestly didn't think it'd bother you that much but…I take it back. You have no right to call yourself a Black. You fail to be one."

Sirius grinned and felt like a huge weight had been lifted "Thanks."

Remus nodded "I mean it to."

It was quiet after that for a moment.

Sirius looked like he wanted to say something but kept his mouth closed and twiddled his thumbs…Remus waited, because he could tell Sirius was dying to say, whatever it was.

Finally Sirius took a breath "You said…you accidentally…well…the wolf did it really but…someone died?" the words seemed ill-prepared and awkward as they spilled out of his mouth.

Remus looked surprised "Wait…you really _don't_ remember?"

Sirius shook his head "Uh-ah. Out of all the things I'm suddenly remembering, you telling me that isn't one of them…"

He sighed and looked down sadly "Yes…well, it was a muggle girl, back where I used to live…she was the first friend I ever really had…I just didn't want to kill another friend so close to me…that's why it hurt so bad. I thought you remembered that and were just trying to put me through it again…you were the only one I told about it and…well, if you did remember it, then the low blow comment would've fit the picture."

Sirius frowned "Oh no way. Remus I'd never do that. I mean, you're one of my best friends! I didn't even know. Or rather, I can't remember when you told me."

Remus waved a hand dismissively "It's unimportant, anyways, I'm actually pretty tired, mind leaving so I can get some sleep?" he really wanted to get off the subject, it was bad enough he'd accused Sirius of it in the first place.

Sirius frowned slightly but nodded "Alright, alright. Seri'll probably tear me apart when I get out there but, you know, I'll survive it somehow…"

Remus chuckled softly "Yeah, I can imagine…(yawn)…well, goodnight, or whatever time it is…"

Sirius nodded "Right." and walked to the door.

Remus yawned once more and crawled back to the top of the bed and under the covers, still pretty tired. He had a feeling he'd sleep much better now that he wasn't thinking about how angry he was or anything.

"Oh and so you know…" Sirius said from the doorway.

Remus looked up "Hm?"

Sirius turned back and gave him a stern look "Just cuz we're _friends_ again doesn't mean I agree to this whole 'mate' thing. I'm not that easy."

Remus put his hands up defensively "I never said that."

Sirius nodded "Don't think it either." and walked out the door, closing it softly behind him.

Remus rolled his eyes and dropped back on the pillows "What's a guy got to do to get a peaceful sleep without thoughts on the brain?" he muttered to the ceiling.

---

End A/N: Hm, I'm not sure. Anyone got an answer to that question let me know; I'm up half the night thinking! Well again, sorry I took so long, I'll try to be quicker with this next chap. Hope it didn't suck or anything, I tried to make it good but quick. Review if you please, I know I'd enjoy it!

(1) That's one of my favorite paradoxes (or oxymoron, which ever)


	30. Chapter 30

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there reading public! Ok, I know I took a while and I'm sorry, I'm really swamped right now, so bare with me. I did the best I could on this chapter; I hope it meets your standards. So, with no more to say, chapter 30!

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam, Seri and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, their probably mine.

**Chapter 30**

"-And then he gets up to leave but before he does he says 'Just because we're friends again doesn't mean I agree to this whole 'mate' thing. I'm not that easy'."

Lily's eyes widened "Really? What else after that?"

"Well, then I told him I didn't say that and he said 'Don't think it either.' And…then he left." Remus finished.

Right now they both sat in the common room, alone, because everyone else thought it was too great a day to spend inside. A couple days had past since the incident Remus was repeating happened and he'd been waiting for this chance to talk to Lily about it ever since it happened.

Sure, he could have gone to James, but James wasn't as good with this sort of thing. You go to James if you've accidentally cursed yourself or you need flying tips, Quidditch tips, you know, all those manly type things, not when you had questions about romance.

Lily had a thoughtful look, considering all that he'd said.

"…Well? Do you think I still have a chance?" he asked as patiently as he could.

Finally she sighed "It's hard to say…I mean, first off, Sirius isn't a girl so I don't know if when he says that if he's saying you should try harder or that you don't have a chance…exactly _how_ did he say it?"

Remus shrugged "I don't know, he just…said it. I mean, he sounded kinda serious when he 'I'm not that easy' but…almost sort of playful when he said 'Don't think it either'…"

Lily giggled "Oh! Well, still, I can't tell you for sure. Reason number two that this is difficult, Sirius is…well…you know, he's Sirius and you can never really tell with him what he means when he says stuff."

Remus nodded "Tell me about."

"All I can really say is, don't give up. I'm not entirely sure, but I think he's hinting that you **may** still have a chance." Lily concluded.

Remus smiled and nearly stood up "You really think so?"

She nodded "Yep, but don't get carried away. I mean, don't give up but don't become over-baring in your eagerness."

Remus tilted his head slightly "Er, and what's the standard of over-baring?"

She smiled "Oh you know, sending him gifts all the time, talking to him every second you see him, showing off whatever your good at like an idiot, walking around with an undeserved sense of importance, catcalls, messing your hair up to look like you were on a broom, doing that **stupid** eyebrow raiseand…you know, pretty much everything James did until we got together this year. You've seen how he used to be, that's how you're NOT suppose to act."

Remus chuckled "Like I have the self-esteem to even try being as flamboyant as that."

She nodded "I know. Oh, but don't have too _little_ confidence in yourself either. Be humble but not weak. You don't want to get stepped on."

"Right. Have confidence, don't give up and don't be over-baring…" he repeated to himself.

Lily nodded "That's right! Also, the most IMPORTANT thing…"

Remus blinked "There's more?"

She nodded "But just one and it's the biggest…be yourself. Don't try changing who you are just to get Sirius' attention. If you have to change for him to want you, then he's not worth it. You can change of your own will if you want but if he _tells you_ that you _have_ to change then…maybe you should just try finding someone else."

Remus sighed and looked at the empty fireplace "If only it were that easy…"

She put a comforting hand on his shoulder "It'll work out."

"…I didn't mean for it to happen you know? This whole 'mated' thing. Honestly, it happened so fast. One minute we were talking and then…I don't know. There was something in my head that seemed to know more about the situation I was in then I did…I just, went with it and…well…you know how it goes…" he murmured, still looking into the fireplace.

She nodded but didn't speak, not really knowing how to respond to that. Luckily for her, she was spared speaking by the common room door opening up by James, who was grinning broadly.

"-I tell you Padfoot, you're a **genius!**" he said over his shoulder.

Sirius shrugged, coming in after James "Well, not sound arrogant but-"

"Too late for that." Remus said playfully as they and Peter sat on the couches to.

Sirius smirked "You're just jealous 'cuz you didn't think of it first!"

Lily sighed "And what brilliant scheme do you have this time?"

James plopped next to her "Ah, it's far greater then any 'scheme'! Picture it, we're all graduated and out of here, with lives and jobs and kids and Hogwarts is left here, without anyone to cause any mayhem!"

Lily rolled her eyes "So no mayhem will happen without you guys?"

"Well, yeah, I'm sure there'll be a few out there who can stir things up a bit, but it'll take them FOREVER to learn all the stuff we did. Sirius was talking about a way we might be able to…leave our noble footsteps for future miscreants!" he said proudly.

This caught both Remus and Lily's attention.

"Really? And how do you pose we do that?" Remus asked curiously.

James' grin widened "Guys, we're gonna make a map!" with that said he paused dramatically to let the words sink in.

"A map?" Lily said somewhat skeptically, crossing her arms.

James nodded eagerly "Genius isn't it? I can't believe I didn't think of it first! We'll make a magic map that'll show them all the secret's of Hogwarts!"

"But," Sirius cut in "They'd have to prove themselves worthy of it first. I was think we'll have…a little password or something like that, just so we can be sure only those who aren't up to any good can use it."

Lily scoffed "Oh really, that's sounds-"

"Brilliant…" Remus murmured.

Lily looked around at him "What?"

He nodded slowly "That sounds fun. We'd have to learn a few spells though, something to help us cloak it and how to keep it all on parchment. It'll take some work but-"

Lily groaned "Honestly! Do you really think it's a GOOD thing to encourage misbehavior?"

James grinned "Come on Lils, it's just a bit of fun!"

Sirius nodded "And fun never hurt anybody!"

"I don't necessarily agree with that but I think this could be fun." Remus said slowly, remembering how 'fun' can get out of hand.

Peter smiled "Think of how they'll thank us for it!"

James leaned closer to her, "You in or out, my love?"

Lily paused, look at them all rather reproachfully…then slowly unfolded her arms "I think I'm going to regret this but…" she nodded.

James laughed and gave her a one armed hug and a kiss on the cheek "Ha! I knew you couldn't resist!"

"When can we start?" Peter asked excitedly.

Sirius smiled "No reason we can't start right now!"

James put a hand in "We're agreed then?"

Sirius put his hand on top of James' "Count on it!"

Peter was near jumping with glee as he put his hand in "Yeah!"

Remus put his in "Of course."

Lily paused for a moment before placing her hand hesitantly on his "…I suppose…"

James grinned "Great!"

---

Once the pact was made, they'd all set to work and split off in pairs to do research in the library. Remus was cautious about how much he hung around Sirius. Trying to keep Lily's advice in mind was harder then he'd first thought.

"_Don't be over-baring, but don't give up…is this over-baring? Be confident! Be me…is he giving me that look because I'm over-baring or because I'm not confident enough?_" thoughts such as that clouded his mind.

"Hey, look at this. It's like a sort of compass charm. If we can make little figures on the map, we can make them move and show them where everyone else is. You know, just incase a teacher or Filch is around." Sirius said lowly, coming over to him with an open book.

Remus took the book and skimmed through the charm "Hm…this is about a seventh year charm we're doing, we'd have to practice a bit before we actually put it on paper."

Sirius leaned over his shoulder to look at the charm again. When he did Remus felt himself holding his breath and clenched the books ends tighter.

"Really? Huh, well, I think it looks pretty easy." Sirius said, not noticing Remus' behavior to the close contact.

Remus swallowed hard "Uh…yeah, well…looks can be deceiving…"

Sirius nodded "True…but if we were able to figure out how to become Animagi I think we can manage this." He said this especially softly and was close enough to Remus that when he did his breath tickled the nape of his neck-

Abruptly Remus got out of his chair from the other side and walked to the nearest book shelf and pretended to be looking for a book "I think there was a good spell in this section, but I'm not sure." He said somewhat hoarsely.

He was sure exactly what was going on behind him, but it sounded like Sirius was shuffling through some books as well.

Remus bit the inside of his mouth, that one encounter, not even really anything, was a real turn on. "_Stupid hormones!_" he mentally cursed, keeping his back turned.

"_Get a hold of yourself Lupin! Just…try to have a __casual__ conversation…don't want to freak him out or be over-baring…_" he thought.

"…So uh…how's your class schedule? You like it?" Remus asked slowly, unsurely.

Behind him, he could imagine Sirius' carefree shrug as he said "Eh, classes are classes, no matter when I have them. Only thing is now I don't have you guys to make it interesting. Sole acts never last as long as when the whole band plays, you know what I mean?"

Remus smiled slightly "Yeah, nice music reference by the way."

Sirius chuckled softly "I can be arty when I want to be. That's part of my undying charm."

Remus rolled his eyes "Of course it is."

"_And it really is…_" he added in his head.

This was nice. A casual conversation, no stress, no tension…Sirius being comfortable enough to get that close to him, to talk to him…it really made him feel better about himself.

However, before this nice conversation could continue, James came upfrom a different aisle"Pst, guys, come here, check this out!"

Remus inwardly frowned, "_Great timing James._" and waited until Sirius was gone before turning back around. He took a few deep breaths just to calm himself down, before following after to see what James had found.

James grinned when he saw Remus coming around, next to him Sirius was snickering "Ok, I know we're suppose to be doing research here but…(snicker) this was just to tempting to ignore. This'd be fun stuff for the up coming match."

In all this drama, Remus had been to almost none of the school's Quidditch matches, which he'd apologized to James for, and had nearly forgotten that Gryffindor's match with Ravenclaw was coming up.

Remus tilted his head to read the book's cover "_How to make any Quidditch Game a laugh_…why would they have that in the school library?"

James shrugged "I dunno, I nicked it from the restricted section when I was looking for spells for the map, but look at this one! You can transfigure the goal posts to run around and away from the Quaffle! And here, check this one out, you can bewitch the Snitch to become invisible to everyone but you and this one, you can charm the Bludgers to go straight for you male opponents-"

"What are you guys whispering about?" Lily asked, coming up from the back of the aisle.

James closed the book "Nothin'. Spells and stuff…d'you and Pete find anything in the other end of the restricted section?"

Peter's head appeared from nowhere "No luck. You'd think they'd be more informed on that sort of thing."

"Well we can't expect them to have any books labeled '_How to make a magical map_' can we?" Sirius said sarcastically.

James nodded "Sirius is right, we have to keep looking for stuff."

And thus, they all once more went to different ends of the library, though Remus notice James slid the Quidditch book into his book-bag before taking off to another shelf.

---

They'd all been working hard to get more info and improve their skills to make the map. It was a good 2 weeks or so before they were able to get at least an outline of how it'd look.

And it wasn't to long after that, that they had an old piece of parchment with little dots moving around. It was the basic outline of Hogwarts and they'd already made it invisible. All they needed to do now was add, a little color to it, and how to get into all the secret passageways.

The five of them all in their dorm with the room locked, though it was somewhat unnecessary considering what hour of the night it was (all in pj's). Still, James didn't want to take any chances when it came to telling about the map.

He grinned as they all sat on the floor "Alright guys, this is it. I think we should sign it, just for a little accreditation for it."

Lily frowned "I said I'd help you, but I'm going to pass on signing it. If this gets you in trouble, I'm not going to be a part of it."

"Hold on, hold on, let me finish! We sign it with our nicknames; all we got to do is come up with one for you Lils." He said reassuringly. Even still, Lily shook her head an insisted she wanted to have no part in signing.

James sighed "Alright, suit yourself."

"Hold on." Remus said, getting out a quill and bending over the paper. He did some writing and though they all tried, no one could see what he had written until he pulled back "We'll need a proper introduction, don't you think?" he said with a smile.

On the paper, shining brightly stood the words: _Messrs. Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs, Purveyors of Aids to Magical Mischief-Makers are proud to present: __**THE MARAUDER'S MAP.**_

On the words were written in ink, he gently tapped his wand to it. The words went gold for a moment before slowly fading back into the parchment, as though they'd been wiped off.

James smiled "Not bad Moony, not bad."

Sirius chuckled "Classy as always."

Peter nodded "Yep, but what about that password."

James got out a quill "Glad you brought that up. See, Sirius and I were talkin' about it. What is really easy to remember, something a mischief in-training would probably say even if it they didn't know about the map and something a grown-up would never even _think_ to say?"

Sirius grinned and held up a hand, as though saying a pledge "I solemnly swear I am up to no good." Then tapped his wand to the parchment and just like that, Remus' title came back up again and once the map was unfolded it showed all of Hogwarts and those roaming the halls.

James couldn't help a laugh, proud of their genius "It's so simple! It's perfect! Of course, sense the map never lies, we came up with a way to hide it all again, or else anyone could read it. Sirius, if you please…"

Sirius nodded "Mischief managed." and with another tap to the paper it all disappeared once more.

Peter grinned "Neat!"

A small smile came to Lily's face "Though I disagree with its purpose, this actually looks like it could work…" she said with an air of satisfaction.

James nodded "Yep! Now, all we have to do is add in all the secret passages ways and a few…remarks, for whoever's stupid enough to try getting into the map without using the password."

Lily yawned "Well, do it on your own tomorrow. I, for one, am tired. And you, being the Quidditch captain, should probably get some sleep to. Tomorrow's your big match."

James nodded "Yep, we lose this and no cup this year."

Agreeing sleep was best for them all, they got up and the boys went their beds. "You sure you don't want to sleep here tonight Lils, you can share my bed." James asked, wagging his eyebrows.

Lily rolled her eyes "As tempting as that sounds, no thanks."

He shrugged andwent around to his bedside"Well, can't blame a man for trying."

The boys were all nearly in their beds, though Remus was picking up the papers from the ground. As Lilymade her way to the door she stopped in front of him and lowered her voice"So how's it going?"

Remus glanced over at Sirius, who was already in his bed, turning over for the night. "Well…he's talking to me, and comfortable enough to touch me, like handshakes and stuff but…I don't know, should I wait for him to bring it up?" he whispered, looking back to her.

She sighed "I don't know…maybe…if he's showing more interest, but that could take a while, a long while. If you feel like you can't wait that long, I think it's time you went on a limb and asked him out."

Remus' eyes widened "What?! B-but I-"

"Hey, you ladies done sharing make-up tips so we can turn out the lights?! I wanna go to bed!" said a somewhat grumpy voice from Sirius' end of the room.

Lily smiled comfortingly "Just think about it. Don't do anything you're not comfortable with." Then spoke to the rest of the room by saying "Good night guys."

"G'night Lily." was the collective sleepy reply.

Remus nodded slightly "Night Lily…" and slowly got into his bed, mulling over what she'd said.

"_Ask him out? What if…I mean…think about it…hmm, I dunno! What should I do?_" were his parting thoughts as he drifted to sleep.

---

_**It was a dark night, the moon was red and the forest was ominous.**_

_**Once more humans chased the wolf, though he was now thoroughly wounded.**_

_**It howled feebly, a deep longing was within the weak animal's cry. It was searching for someone when the human's had found it, shot at its legs with the sticks and were now chasing it, to kill it.**_

_**The harsh laughter grew louder in the wolf's already pounding ears, it wanted desperately to be with a pack, but it was a lone wolf, it always had been and no one would save it.**_

_**Another shot hit the already wounded legs and that was all it took to bring the poor wolf to the ground with a yelp of pain.**_

_**The humans were louder then ever 'We got it, we got it!' was the collective yell.**_

_**The injured wolf looked up at the sky and let out a shaky howl, pleading for help, from anyone, anywhere. But nothing came, no comfort, no anything.**_

_**Hope lost; the wolf wearily closed its eyes as the humans came near. They approached cautiously and stared at the body on the ground "…Yeah, we've got it alright."**_

_**One of the humans chuckled "It's probably glad we did, look at it! Alone, no pack, not even a mate, it was probably miserable as it was…"**_

_**The group all laughed at this.**_

"_**Right…well, who wants the honor of the final blow?" the apparent leader asked.**_

_**There were quite a few volunteers now that he was no longer a threat. A man moved aside and where the wolf's body had been laid a shabby young man with graying hair and a prematurely lined face. He groaned in pain and reached for his bleeding legs.**_

_**None of the crowed seemed to notice the change in bodies. A smaller one in the group walked forward, a hood covering his face. He was probably just barely old enough to join the adults and had an axe in hand "Oh, can I? It's my first time killing a monster." The young man asked with a sort of calm viciousness.**_

_**The elder smiled at the younger "Ah, yes my son. Go on."**_

_**On the ground, the wound young man couldn't move his legs but tried to army crawl away. However, one of the men had been watching him struggle to escape and kicked him hard in the side, knocking the wind out of him.**_

"_**Stay down you beast!" he spat.**_

"_**Son, if you please…"**_

_**The hooded young man stepped forward and held the axe over his head "I'll try to make it a clean cut…"**_

"_**Wait…I'm not…" the wounded struggled to say.**_

_**The wind picked up and the hood of his attacker flew off and he locked eyes with the boy with the axe. Those stormy, grey eyes. The redness of the moon made him look demonic and the others as well. They stretched out and the red glow made their skin change.**_

_**The owner of those eyes smirked callously, his teeth pointed with red all around "Surprise." and raised the axe over his head…**_

Remus' eyes shot open and he scrambled out of his bed (he was somewhat tangled in his sheets) with a small noise of fright. He shook terribly and it took a moment for him to realize he was still in his room in Gryffindor tower.

"Ah…A-a-a dream…it was just a dream…" he said slowly to himself.

"Ughh…Moony? What're you doin'?" a sleepy voice asked to his right.

Remus turned when a small wand-light came from there and couldn't help but jump when he saw those same eyes, only now half-opened not ferociously gleaming.

"I…i-it's nothing…" he said softly.

Sirius slowly got out of his bed and walked around to him, shining the light on him a bit "Jesus Rem, you look like hell."

Remus frowned "It was just a nightmare…"

Sirius rubbed his eyes "Some nightmare…you ok?"

He sighed "Fine…just…it really shook me up."

"Hey, if you want, we could sneak into the kitchen, get somethin' too easy your mind or whatever." Sirius said concernedly, which surprised Remus.

"Um, I don't really-"

"Aw come on, we can use James' cloak. You look like you use a butterbeer or so." Sirius said bracingly.

Remus looked at him for a moment…the eyes that had threatened him only moments ago were now staring at him with the kindness of a friend…he sighed, "Oh…alright."

Sirius beamed and got James' cloak from on top of his trunk.

---

Behind the picture of the large bowl of fruit was the kitchen, they'd found that out in second year and it wasn't long before the two of them were sitting in the middle of the kitchen with the many house-elves of Hogwarts, all bowing and beaming and curtsying at them as they went about, getting food ready for the morning.

(1)The house-elves were wearing the same uniform: a tea towel stamped with the Hogwarts crest, and tied like a toga.

When they'd first came in a dozen or so elves approached them and simultaneously asked 'how the could serve young master's this evening'. And in the next instant they had two chairs placed out of the cooking area and a tray with a few lemon tarts, some biscuits and two butterbeers.

Remus smiled as the house-elves left "I never really get use to being waited on like this."

Sirius drank about half his bottle before wiping his mouth "Yeah, at least these guys are nice about their servitude." There was a bitter edge to his voice as he said that.

However, it left completely as he turned back to Remus "So, what was the nightmare?"

Remus sighed "The usual. I was in my wolf form, a group of people shot me down and I was almost killed, even though I changed back into a human once I was down…"

"_Only a nice twist; you were the one about to kill me…_" he added to himself.

Sirius frowned "That's what you dream about?"

Remus shrugged "Sometimes. I've been having that nightmare ever since I'd gotten bitten…I just never really had it at school before. Here, I usually feel safer then I do at whatever home I live at. It's kind of funny, Professor Trelawney turned me away from Divination but now I wonder if there's really anything to that."

Sirius scoffed "I think it's a load of Hogwash."

Remus smiled "And you don't think that just because she told you, you have a grim future?"

"Hey, she only said that because she caught me in the hall once making fun of those huge glasses she wears. Her eyes always look like they're bugging out." Sirius said defensively.

Remus laughed "Of course, I almost forgot!"

Sirius grinned "Yeah, everyone found it funny till she came up the hall…old coot, she doesn't even know what she's saying! Why, I bet I can tell you what your dream meant!"

Remus looked highly amused by the very idea of it "Really?"

He nodded "Yep. It's saying, 'you're going to have a great time at the Quidditch match and do Sirius' essay for him because he's such a good friend and helped you in your time of need'. The end."

Remus rolled his eyes "Close, but I don't think so."

Sirius shrugged "Ah, I tried."

They sat in the kitchen, drinking butterbeer and talking for a good few hours and it wasn't long before the fright of the dream vanished. They laughed and talked till on of the house-elves came up once more.

"Um, pardon me young masters. Breakfast will be served in about half an hour. Would you like to eat down here, or up there?" he asked in a squeaky voice.

Remus looked around for a clock "Good lord, how long have we been down here?"

"Approximately 6 hours sirs…we is all glad to serve you down here, if that is your wishes." The house-elf squeaked cheerily.

Sirius shook his head "No, we'll go back up. Thank you."

The house-elf beamed and bowed lowly "It is an honor to serves you, young masters."

Remus smiled as the elf went back to the cooking area "I can't imagine any human being so generous as that in their work."

Sirius nodded "Yeah…well, come on, we better get back to the room before James notices his cloak is missing."

After bidding the house-elves farewell, they headed back to the dorm with the cloak hiding them both. As they walked up the stairs, Remus couldn't help remembering all the other times the two of them had used it…which made him wonder…

"…Um, Sirius?" he asked hesitantly.

Sirius didn't even look at him as he said "Yeah?"

He paused "…Er…I was wondering…just so you're not surprised that I know, you told me about her when you were under the love potion, but…why didn't you ever try to hook up with anyone, after Gloria."

Sirius stopped walking and looked at him "…I told you about that?"

Remus nodded, now regretting bring it up "Look, if it's too personal you don't have to tell me, I was just wondering…" he said quickly, starting to walk again.

Sirius followed so he could still be covered by the cloak and neither spoke as they went. Just as they came up to the Fat Lady, however, Sirius spoke "I dunno…I guess I was just to torn up to really look for anyone else. I'm not really to torn today, but I guess no one of really interests me here. But, I always give anyone who thinks they could handle me a fighting chance. Unless they're annoying as hell. I mean, I've had more dates then I care to count and it's just…no one really seems to fit the bill."

Remus nodded slowly "I see…"

"Hippilbom." Sirius said and the Fat Lady swung open, eyes still closed.

Once inside he yawned "Good thing it's the weekend, we can sleep in. I don't know about you, but after eating all those tarts and biscuits, I think I can skip out on breakfast. I'm goin' back to bed."

Remus nodded, though he seemed a bit distant. Both snuck successfully back into the room, put James' cloak back and got back in their beds.

"Night Moony- er, morning, whatever." Sirius said sleepily as he pulled his covers over his head to block out the sun.

Remus nodded "Yeah…" but stayed awake.

He didn't feel tired at all.

It was about 8 in the morning so it wouldn't be long before everyone woke up so he just got his cloths and decided to take a quick shower, all the while thinking of what Sirius had said.

"…'_No one really seems to fit the bill'…then what chance do I have?_" he thought to himself.

---

At the breakfast table, James shoved down breakfast faster than Peter would have been if he were there.

Lily cringed at the disgusting way he chewed "I can't tell if he's excited or nervous…"

Remus chuckled "I think he's anxious. We miss this and we lose the cup right?"

James nodded, not looking up from his food.

He seemed thoroughly distract, so Lily leaned over the table "D'you think about what I said?"

Remus sighed "Yes…and I think I haven't got a chance in hell."

She frowned, "Remus-"

"However…I'm going to try anyway. I mean, last night I had a nightmare and he was there for me. He comforted me and made me feel better and…and I want that, not just when I'm sad but all the time. Sure, he'll probably say no, but he told me he gives everyone at least one chance…unless they're annoying as hell." He said softly.

Lily smiled "Oh Remus that's great! When are you going to ask?"

He looked down uncomfortably "I dunno…whenever I do I guess. But I want to today, if I can."

Before Lily could press the matter, Peter walked up…holding Seri's hand?!

James looked up from his meal with a grin "Well, well, well, what have we here?"

Seri smirked "I don't know, I think you turned into a human vacuum."

James blinked "I'm a _what_?"

"A muggle cleaning device. It sucks up all the dust and stuff on the floor." Remus said.

James nodded slowly "Oh…hey!"

Seri chuckled as they sat down "Peter asked me to go to Hogsmeade."

"So you two are an item now?" James asked slyly, wiggling his eyebrows.

Both blushed slightly at the suggestiveness in his voice but nodded.

James grinned "HA! I knew it! Sirius owes me 6 galleons!"

Lily groaned "James…"

He smiled and wiped his mouth "Well, I'm done. See you guys later, I've got a team to console; this is the last Quidditch match of the year!" with a swift kiss to Lily's cheek, he left.

Lily rolled her eyes but smiled at the two of them "Congratulations anyway."

Seri smiled "Thank you."

Peter fearfully glanced up at Remus "So er…no hard feelings, bout this?"

Remus shook his head, beaming at them "Not at all! Seri, I'm glad you were able to find someone who'll be a better boyfriend to you then I was."

Peter looked surprised "You- you mean that?"

He nodded "Of course. I'm happy for you both."

Seri smiled "Thank you Remus. See, I told you he wouldn't care." She said softly to Peter, who looked far more relieved.

They all ate their breakfast and joined the rest of the student body who crowed the corridor to get out on the Quidditch field. Remus, however, pulled away from the group.

"I'm going to get Sirius up!" he shouted over the loud chattering of everyone else.

Lily smiled with a nodded and disappeared into the crowd. Remus had a bit of a hard time making it to the stairs, it was like going up a down current, but he managed.

"Password?"

"Hippilbom." He said, and the Fat Lady swung open.

He opened the dorm door and walked over to Sirius' bed. He still had the covers over his head. Remus shook him slightly "Hey, Padfoot, get up, the Quidditch match is gonna start."

Not even a groan of response, he was out.

Remus frowned and shook him again "Hey!"

Nothing.

With groan, Remus pulled the covers back "I said-" he stopped short at the sight of him…why did he have to look so perfect all the time? At some point he must have gotten hot under his blankets cuz he didn't have his night shirt on anymore.

His bare chest rose and fell in rhythm with his soft breathing, his lips seemed to have a natural pout…just begging to be kissed…

"No, stop!" he told himself, grabbing his head "At least not until I've asked him out…Sirius, get up!" he said, not looking at him as he shook him awake.

This time Sirius groaned and batted his hand "Go away! Sleepin'…"

"Ok, you can miss the last Quidditch match of the year." Remus said, moving away.

Sirius sat up groggily "Ah, it's starting already?"

Remus nodded "Yep. But don't worry, I'm sure it's not big deal if we win or not."

"Alright, alright, I'm up! I'll take a shower after the match." Sirius grumbled, getting out of bed and pulling a shirt on.

Remus turned away as he got dressed the rest of way. Physical attraction was only one of the many things that made him desirable and he felt ready to ask right then and there…in fact…

"Hey, uh, Sirius? You remember how you said you'd give anyone who thought they could handle you, a fighting chance?" he asked slowly.

Sirius threw his robe over his cloths "Yeah, come on, I think they've already released the Snitch!" he said, dashing out the door.

Remus followed in suit "Wait, I was just, wondering if maybe…" he said as they ran down the stairway.

But Sirius wasn't paying attention, and picked up his pace as they made it to the doors and out on the grounds.

---

In the air, James flew around the stands where he'd seen the Snitch last and Jones from the Ravenclaw team was there as well. The score was 50 to 30, Ravenclaw had a slight lead.

All he had to do was wait until they had at least 80 points then grab the Snitch and the trophy was theirs.

"And the Quaffle is passed to Robinson, then to Jefferson- OH! Nasty Bludger to the gut, Beaters McNen and Pollin better wake up!" the announcer shouted over the screaming crowed.

Sirius and Remus had just made it up into the stands and waded their way to Lily and Peter who were yelling with the rest of the Gryffindors.

Lily smiled "Hey guys!"

"What's the score?" Sirius asked, squinting to see the score-board.

"50-40, Gryffindor's down by 10." Peter shouted over a loud yell of dismay from the Ravenclaw side.

Sirius frowned "Come on guys, 4 more scores!" he shouted.

Remus stood next to him sadly and closed his eyes "_I'll just have to wait, I mean, he'd probably say no anyway._"

"Coolin has the Quaffle, passes to Pamdem, she's taking it all the way…SCORE GRYFFINDOR!!! 50-50!" the announcer screamed.

The Gryffindor side erupted with cheers, but Remus was deaf to them.

"_Don't you think you've done enough waiting in one life time?_" a small voice of confidence said in his head.

"Redum has it now…Coolin gaining speed, he's about to grab it- OH! Nice swerve by Redum! A miracle he's even still on his broom after that one! He's passes to Jefferson, Jefferson's down to the pitch- AH! Intercepted! Nice move by Mosha! Now Mosha's got the Quaffle, he's taking it down…"

"_You always hold your tongue, wait your turn and you get stepped on! You're to patient! What if you wait so long that eventually he finds someone else? Do you want that? You've got to speak up before someone else does!_" the little voice said, growing a bit louder.

"Mosha passes to Coolin who…he's turning the other way?! Why? The other's follow- but wait! A fake pass! Oh what a plan! Mosha scores with no problem! 60-50, Gryffindor takes the lead! But for how long?!"

"_What does it matter if I ask him now? He'll probably just reject me anyway…it's hopeless…_" he thought sullenly.

"-Pamdem has it now, she's racing to the posts, she throws it- OHHH! Nice save by Keeper Mike Vinacal!"

"AW COME ON! GET WITH IT NANCY!!" Sirius shouted.

"Vinacal passes to Robinson and he races to the Gryffindor line!"

Sirius leaned to the edge of the stand "COME ON PAUL, BLOCK HIM FOR GOD'S SAKE!! GET IT BACK!!!"

"_If that's the way you're going to think then you might as well give up school and take up a job as a talking doormat!_"

"-Pamdem does a follow up and- OUCH! Right into the stands! Op, Couch Mandin(2) blows the whistle on that one…yes, Gryffindor gets a penalty throw."

Robinson had pushed Nancy Pamdem right into the stands and this earned a loud roar of anger from the Gryffindor stands.

"**PLAY LIKE MAN YOU SCUM!!!**" Sirius hollered along with all the other outraged Gryffindors.

"…There she goes…WHOO! 70-50, Gryffindor leads by 20 points!" the announcer shouted.

James moved from his spot, now he had to actually start looking for the Snitch, Jones followed him…

"_Do you want to go through all your life thinking about what could have been? Wishing you'd spoken when you'd had the chance?! Do you want to live, regretting the past?!?_"

"Coolin's has the Quaffle…he's taking it all the way home…OH! Just dodged that Bludger!"

"Come on, come on, come OOOOON!!!!" Sirius said, gripping the edges of the stands.

"_Think about it…is that the life you want?_"

"Coolin has it…he's all cleared…"

"_WELL!?!_"

"HE'S SCORED! GRYFFINDOR UP TO 80!!! If Potter can find the Snitch, they'll have the cup!" the announcer screamed.

James took high above the field, looking for even the slightly glint that may have gotten from the sun…Jones decided to get off his broom tail and look for the snitch on his own…

Remus opened his eyes "No." he shook Sirius' shoulder "Sirius, I need to ask you something."

"Later Moony, James' is gonna get us the cup! Come on Prongs, come on!" he said offhandedly.

But inspired by the voice of confidence, Remus didn't back down. He frowned "This is important Sirius!"

James thought he say a glimmer of gold by the Gryffindor end and raced there, Jones at his feet…but when he got there he saw it was just the light reflecting off someone's glasses frame.

He cursed under his breath at the misfortune and Jones, seeing that it wasn't there, went to the other end of the field. James could here a few of the shouts from his team, including Sirius yelling at him to find the Snitch quick.

"Come on! Hurry, the cup's at stake!" he heard him shout.

James looked around from where he was, inwardly rolling his eyes at the obviousness of the statement "_As if I don't already know!_" he thought.

Remus groaned "Would you just listen to me for a second?!"

Sirius didn't even look at him as he said "What?! Spit it out! Come on Nancy, take it through…YEEEAAH!!!"

The side exploded with cheers and the announcer's yell that they were up to 90 points. It was too much noise, he'd never hear him ask…Remus summoned up the loud voice he could so to be heard with everyone else's yells.

"**WILL YOU GO OUT WITH ME?!**" He bellowed.

But his timing was all wrong. Everyone had just quieted as he shouted and his sudden exclamation made everyone within ear's reach look at him. Sirius' eyebrows seemed to have gotten lost in his hair, they were raised so high.

James, who was still by the stands, turned his head in the direction, recognizing the voice that had yelled.

And then it happened.

It only took that one split second of distraction from the game for it to happen. James didn't hear the Beater yell 'Look out' until BAM he felt himself being knocked off his broom.

As he fell and his eyes started to close, he saw it. The golden little Snitch, right in hands reach…he reached out and felt the little wings beating against his palm and then…darkness.

---

End A/N: DO **NOT** PANIC! James will be fine. I just had to have a dramatic end, that's all, you know me. Well, I hope you all enjoyed it. Please, don't get mad at me for taking so long, I'm trying my best. Be thankful I even got the chance to get on. The end of the school year's coming up fast so I have a lot of work to do as it is. I'll try to update sooner but there's no guarantee. If you liked it, hated it, let me know. Reviews please!

(1): That was almost an exact quote. I kid you not, look in the fourth book. The chapter's called 'The House-Elf Liberation front'

(2): I wasn't sure if Madam Hooch was there at the time and I didn't want to risk getting lectured about how this was before her time so I just changed the person.

The Teams went like this. Gryffindor team: Nancy Pamdem, Richard Coolin and Paul Mosha (all the Chasers)

Now the Ravenclaw team: Mike Vinacal (Keeper), Erik Jones (Seeker), Sam Robinson, Kyle Jefferson, Mason Redum (the Chasers), John McNen, Taylor Pollin (the Beaters).

Anymore questions, don't hesitate to ask, see you next chapter!


	31. Chapter 31

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey guys. Sorry if this chapter sucks, depression bunnies have moved into my garden of happiness, a clever analogy my mom likes to use, pretty much sayin' I ain't feelin' my best. I tried to keep my depression from leaking into the story but…geez, I feel like shit, but I really hope I was able to keep this good. Sorry if I was unsuccessful, chalk up another thing I've failed at…

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam, Seri and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, their probably mine.

**Chapter 31**

Darkness…

"-You think he's ok?" a distant voice asked worriedly.

"Oh yeah, he was only about 5 or so feet off the ground and Madam Pomfrey thought she'd never get that Snitch outta his hand so he'll be pleased when he wakes up…" another voice said with a forced sounding cheerfulness.

He groaned and struggled to open his eyes "Ugggh…Pads?" he said weakly, vision still blurred.

Slowly, the blurry outline of Sirius Black became solid, next to him was Lily who smiled brightly as he came around and on his other side were his team mates, all beaming at their captain.

"Doin' alright Prongs?" Sirius asked with a strained smile.

James rubbed his eye a bit "I guess…d'you get the number of that Knight Bus that hit me?"

Sirius chuckled slightly "No, but you'll be glad to know we got the Cup and the Snitch was painlessly removed from your death grip."

James laughed a little but grabbed his side "Ow, ow! Pads, don't make me laugh, it hurts. Hey Lils, oh you're smile's bright enough to blind a man…"

Lily giggled "Nice to see you to…"

He looked back at his team "Great job today guys and we've got the Cup to show for it."

"Couldn't have done it without you cap'in!" Richard Coolin said merrily.

"Really, grabbing the snitch as you were falling, that's got to be some kind of record! Brilliant captain!" Nancy said, nearly jumping up and down in excitement.

It wasn't necessary for them to call him 'captain' but they'd been doing so ever since he'd earned the title and it did make the throbbing of his side lessen considerably.

"And the way you took that Bludger right in the side! I'm surprised you didn't break a rib or anything!"

James smiled "Aw, well…I've become a bit more tolerant to pain, lately…" he glanced over at Lily and Sirius.

Lily smiled, but Sirius (now that he was no longer being directly talked to) was staring out the window with his arms crossed, an unreadable expression on his face.

James looked at the team "Hey, they havin' a party in the Gryffindor tower?"

"Having one? It's been going on since the game ended! We've been up here waiting for you to come around…well, except Ryan (Keeper) who's been showin' of the trophy…git." Paul scoffed.

"Why don't you all go up then? Just cuz I'm impaired doesn't mean you should all miss out on the fun. If there's any firewhisky save a pint for me." He said happily.

The team made no argument to that; in fact, they were gone almost before he finished telling them to leave!

James looked to Sirius once the door was shut "…You alright?"

For a moment he didn't say anything, just stared out that window as though something interesting were about to happen…then he sighed and uncrossed his arms "I…don't know…"

James blinked "Oh. Well, if it's about the whole Bludger thing, hey, if he hadn't shouted out, Jones probably would've beat me to the Snitch. He was down field more, you know?"

Sirius nodded "Yeah…"

Lily kept her silence, though she looked like she wanted to say something.

Sirius looked back to the window "…I don't know. I'm angry and embarrassed because he just yelled it right out for everyone to hear-"

"His timing was off! He didn't mean to say it right _then_; he thought that everyone would still be yelling when he asked!" Lily said unexpectedly.

Both James and Sirius looked at her in surprise.

"Well gee Lily; act as though it's your fault." James said sarcastically.

Lily groaned "Well it is! I mean, not directly but…I've been kind of pushing him to ask you Sirius and-"

Sirius frowned "You WHAT! So you told him to ask me right at the Quidditch match?"

She shook her head "No, no, I didn't know that's when he would, but I told him not to let himself be stepped on, to take a stand and-"

"AND EMBARRASS ME IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE SCHOOL! **BRILLIANT **LILY!" Sirius exploded.

She sighed "It wasn't suppose to happen like that…Sirius, will you at least give him the chance-"

"Don't you think you've done enough meddling! Why don't you just butt out!" he snapped, turning his heel and leaving.

The door slammed shut and the candle-light in the room wavered.

Lily turned to James "Why didn't you back me up?"

He glanced at the ground "Wellll…he did sorta…have a point…"

She frowned, "James!"

He put his hands up defensively "Don't hurt the injured!"

---

Remus, meanwhile, sat dejectedly in the common room, oblivious to all the fun and partying going on around him. He instead sat in one of the lone chairs by the corner, accompanied only by Peter and surprisingly, Seri.

A few were skeptical to see her there, but she assured those who asked that a game was just a game and she had no intentions of sabotaging their party. She still got a few looks but no one really confronted her.

Remus could careless, whether they were there or not, he'd still be silent as he was now, thinking, rewinding what had just happened in his mind. After his yell everyone of coursed looked at him, he wanted nothing more then to either be swallowed up by the earth or to Apparate to the farthest corner of the world. Timing never really was his thing. But among the stares he got, Sirius' was the one he focused on. And even to this point, he couldn't forget that look. He looked flabbergasted, embarrassed, perhaps a bit of anger, but the one emotion that stood out most was…confusion. And then he left. Not saying a word, he walked around him, out of the stands and…off the field. No one had seen him sense.

Remus put a hand thoughtfully under his chin, thinking back to his face. 'What could he be confused about?' Maybe…even though it happened embarrassingly, he could actually…be considering it…

"_Yep, and pretty soon everyone'll accept werewolves as normal people! And then the pure-bloods'll get off their high horses and join the rest of us on earth! And hey, while they're at it, they can tell all the muggles about our world!_" the sullen, sarcastic voice scoffed in his head. "_Or…maybe I just made the biggest fool of myself and him and he's wondering if he should kill me or just hire someone else to do it…_"

He sighed and shook his head "I'm so dumb…"

Peter bit his lip "Well…you do have bad timing…"

Seri nudged him with her elbow then looked back to Remus "It's good that you got it off your chest. I mean, at least now he knows, right? He might give you a chance."

"Did you see the horrified look on his face?" he muttered gloomily.

She sighed, "Remus…"

"No, this is pointless…why the hell do I keep trying to get something I'll never have? I should just accept it, Sirius doesn't like me like that, he never will…and it's foolish of me to keeping hoping for it…I mean, I can't really blame him, after all I've done…I don't deserve him…" He said softly, the sullen voice winning after all.

The party was just adding to his depression. He set down his drink that he hadn't even touched and got out of his chair.

Peter frowned sympathetically as he did "Hey, where you goin'?"

"To hell, probably." He said, not looking back as he left.

Seri stood up "Remus, come on." But he was out the door before she even finished saying his name.

Peter shook his head "Well, we tried."

Seri huffed "Oh honestly, this has to stop! Sirius should at least give him a chance! Hm…come on." She said, grabbing his hand.

A small blush crossed his face as she pulled him out of his chair "Wh-where are we going?"

"We're gonna find Sirius." She said determinedly.

---

Sirius wondered the halls aimlessly. He didn't care if Filch or that mangy rag he called a cat found him. His shoulders hunched, he stared at his feet as he walked, thinking.

"_Stupid Remus…why the hell does he have to complicate everything? We'd just figured everything out, we're finally friends again and…and now he has to start this whole thing again! WHY?_" he thought angrily.

Before he could even think of an answer to that, Seri and Peter rounded a corner…holding hands?

"When'd that happened?" he asked aloud, unsure if they were close enough to hear him.

A smirk slowly came to his face, teasing was always a good pick-me-up.

"Whoa! Get the _Daily Prophet;_ I've just seen the biggest news story of the century! 'Peter Pettigrew gets girl and world DOESN'T end'!" he said, loudly this time, and causing them both to whirl around and look at him.

Peter's face went an excellent shade of red at the comment but Seri was unfazed by it. "There you are, where've you been?" she asked walking up to him, still holding Peter's hand.

"Went to see James. But on a more important matter, when'd this come about?" he asked, still smirking slyly at the two of them, gesturing at their clasped hands.

Seri rolled her eyes "Oh please, as if you've never seen anyone holding hands before. Just this morning but that's not what we're going to talk about. Where'd you go after…well, you know-"

"Remus' loud and embarrassing offer?" he said, a bit more snappishly then he'd first intended.

Seri gave him a look and he sighed, "Sorry. I went to the hospital wing, like I said and waited until they brought James up and…just, stayed there. Till he woke up and Lily told us that the whole thing was **her** idea!"

At this even Peter looked surprised "She told him to ask you at the Quidditch match?"

He crossed his arms "Not exactly…but pretty much!"

"Did you even think about it?" she asked.

He glanced at the wall "…Bout what?"

Seri frowned, "The offer."

He scoffed "Tst, no."

The frown on her face deepened "So that's it? You're not even going to give him a chance?"

"I don't see why I should! Didn't you see out there? That's gotta to be the most embarrassing thing that's happened all year!" he scowled.

"Well did you ever think that maybe it's because he liked you?" she countered.

Sirius frowned "I don't have to explain myself to you, I said no and that's final!"

At that Seri let go of Peter's hand. Sirius's eyes widened as she marched up to him and poked him hard in the chest "No! This has gone on long enough! Listen here, 'Mr. Perfect', Remus has been trying his hardest to do everything to make you happy and gain your approval, at the very least you should give him the same chance you give everyone else who asks you out! What's more, you actually KNOW him! Also, if I recall correctly, you feel the same way!"

At that he stopped trying to ignore her and looked her straight in the eyes "Excuse me?"

She frowned "Don't play dumb, remember, ages ago, you asked me about sexual preferences and asked if I knew who Remus really liked, instead of me? (That'd be chapter 23 for those of you who don't remember) You were so curious and don't even say you weren't thinking of Remus when you asked me about it, I know you where! Why do you think I snapped at you! Deep down, I knew it was you he really wanted and I was a little angry at you for it!"

Sirius frowned deeply "That wasn't my fault!"

"I'm not saying it is! I'm not mad at you for it now, but what I **am** mad about is that you have feelings about him but you won't fess up to them! You're hiding from yourself and you know it-"

Sirius clenched his fists angrily "SHUT UP!"

"NO! You need to open your eyes and stop living in denial! He hurt you, yeah ok, but he apologized and you got to hurt him back! Now will you stop being so pigheaded, swallow your pride and admit to yourself you MAY still have feelings for him?" she shouted.

Sirius opened his mouth but no words came out. That's one thing he admired and hated about Seri; she always had a good point! Back before he found out about the 'mate' thing, he was starting to really come around to Remus…he was even considering him…but once he found out he'd been lied to, he closed up and pulled away, feeling used…now that they'd patched it up, he still was closed to the idea…but maybe…not as much as he'd first hoped.

"I…I just…you…" he struggled to find words but they left him.

"_I WAS considering him…I even told him, I give everyone who thinks they can handle me a chance…I told him so…_" a small voice whispered in his head.

Seri's brown eyes were still narrowed in determination as she glared him down. No matter what he said, he knew that this was a losing battle he was fighting with her.

And the small voice grew louder, reminding him of the time Remus had been sleeping and how he'd stood there, just watching him…then when Remus had said, still sleeping, _his_ name. Had whispered about _him_. Not anyone else…

It was too much to take, he was starting to feel suffocated and get a major headache. He gripped his head "Grrr…WHY DON'T YOU ALL JUST **BUTT OUT**?"

Seri frowned "Because you're only hurting yourself and Remus with your stubbornness and we're just trying to get you to stop it."

Sirius frowned back "I don't need your help so just leave me alone!" and turned, not sure where he was going but away from there was just where he'd wanted to be. Peter had blended meekly to the background when the yelling had started so Sirius was slightly surprised to pass him.

Still, he said nothing, not even to him, as he left.

---

Down the stairs, down all the stairs. He was surprised to have not seen anyone as he stormed down all the stairs and made it to the Great Hall. He saw the large doors and walked out.

"_Maybe the fresh air'll do me good…_" he thought as he went.

And it did. The air was cool that night, the stars shining brightly above, just a bit of the moon showing. Sirius frowned; the moon was partly to blame for all this as well.

Ignoring it as best he could, he continued outside, walking until he reached the lake, then proceeding to walk along that was well. The silence was nice, not even crickets or bird made noises as he went.

Finally, there was no noises, no one talking to him about all the crap going on. It was so…peaceful. He closed his and let out a deep sigh. Now _this_ was what he needed.

"…_Remus must really care…I mean…all the stuff he's done…_" the small little voice piped up.

He shook his head "_Please…I don't want to think about this right now…_"

"_But you did say you give everyone a chance…he's a person to, right? Don't you think he's entitled to the same treatment?_"

Sirius frowned and opened his eyes, but as soon as he did, he wished he hadn't. Just a few feet in front of him stood the very person in question. Remus didn't seem to notice Sirius, as he was facing the lake, throwing stones in.

He had a look of concentration on his face, as though he were thinking but in his eyes shone one thing that was unmistakable:

Loneliness.

Sirius frowned a bit and glanced at his shoes.

"_Well? Doesn't he deserve the same treatment?_" it questioned again.

Remus was oblivious to his presence, even as he walked a little bit closer. He stood, not right next to him, but close enough that he didn't have to yell to be heard.

But he didn't speak.

He was kind of hoping he wouldn't have to start this, that Remus would see him out of the corner of his eye and talk first, but he didn't. He was too focused on the rocks or whatever was going on in his head.

Sirius bent down and picked up a rock himself…he threw it up and down in his hand for a moment before tossing it in the lake as well.

Remus jumped at the sight of another rock hitting the lake and turned to face him. A bit of panic crossed his face when he finally realized Sirius was there but he still didn't speak.

Their eyes locked and they held their gaze for a moment, neither moving a muscle…Sirius then got another rock and tossed it into the lake. Remus watched him for a moment before going back to throwing rocks as well.

"…So…ahem, er…how long have you been standing there?" Remus asked slowly, not so much as glancing at him as he asked.

Sirius shrugged "I dunno…"

Other then the small plop the rocks made as they hit the water, no noise was made for a while, talking or otherwise. Even the wind lessened and wasn't loud in their ears.

Remus threw on rock pretty far, though it looked unintentional. Sirius glanced at him, then grabbed a rock and threw it further then that. Remus returned the look and tossed his second rock further.

Before they knew it, a rock throwing contest had begun and each were trying to throw their rocks furthest, trying to hit the castle wall even, laughing occasionally.

It was nice, but it wasn't long before they ran out of rocks within reach and all that was left was sand.

Sirius sighed "Well, there goes that game."

Remus smiled slightly "Everything's always a contest with you."

Sirius laughed "I guess so!"

They laughed a little at that and then silence ensued.

Sirius stared out at the lake for a moment, then, without really thinking about what he was going to say, spoke "So…you _really_ want to go with me?"

Remus spun around so fast it was a surprise he didn't twist something "Wha?"

Sirius smirked "Well, you did make the very loud claim you did, right? Or was that just a hallucination?"

He nodded quickly "Yes- er no! Er, I mean uh…y-yeah, I asked…"

Sirius chuckled slightly "I didn't think you'd be so nervous about it…you sounded so confident on the field."

Remus scratched the back of his head "I guess it was mostly a spur of the moment confidence…" he muttered embarrassedly.

He smiled "Right…well, I did say I give everyone a chance, didn't I?"

Remus nodded wordlessly, eyes wide in incredulity.

Sirius smiled "Alright, I am a man of my word after all. So, where do you want to go and when?"

"I…I…uh…y…you're serious?" Remus asked still in disbelief.

He put a hand to his chin "Hm, last time I checked, 'serious' was my name. I think I am…yeah, I'm serious."

Sirius laughed at his own joke but Remus stood still, eyes wide in shock.

"Haha, well, you just let that sink and uh, get back to me when you've found your voice. Kay?" he said, his laughter slowly dying.

Remus, still astonished at the claim, just nodded.

"Er…right…so uh…I'll see ya later…" Sirius said, turning to the castle.

Again, Remus just nodded and watched him leave.

"Wow…I have that effect on girls, I didn't know it was on guys to…" he muttered as he reached the castle doors.

"_So it was that easy. Now, I've got a date with Remus._" He thought.

He stopped walking and a smile came to his face. For some reason, the thought made him feel…funny, inside. In a good way, in fact, it felt like someone tickled his insides.

"Heh…I've got a date with Remus…" he said audibly, though not loudly.

Saying it aloud made the feeling grow, like someone was tickling his insides and it made him feel like laughing…a grin came to his face as he went up the stairs, still a bit surprised to meet no one on his way back to the dorm.

---

End A/N: Welp, there you go. I'm workin' as best I can (considering the circumstances). I'm sorry, I really am, I'll try to feel better so I don't write awfully, kay? See you soon.


	32. Chapter 32

**Accidents happen**

A/N: Hey out there, reading public! Awww, thanks guys! I'm feelin' a lot better now, for those who care. I didn't say in last chapter (due to my untimely depression) but this is actually going to be the last chapter. Sorry guys! But if it means anything, I think this is one of my better ones. I hope you guys think so to. I don't know about were you guys are (you know, different time zones and all) but it's Easter where I am, so I'm saying to all, HAPPY EASTER!! Enjoy the final chapter! (Sorry I didn't tell you before!)

Disclaimer: I am not J.K Rowling thereby I don't own Hogwarts or any of the characters you all know and love, however, I may make up a few of my own along the way and come up with some other stuff to so if you don't recognize it then it's probably mine, though, if you want I'll tell you exactly what's what, I mean, if it truly bothers you or something (although I honestly can't see why it would, I mean, this is fan_fiction_ after all). I do own Professor Ronts, Professor Sune, Sam, Seri and any other side characters I throw in there. So you can just think of it as, if they don't sound familiar to you, their probably mine.

**Chapter 32**

Remus stood outside for even he didn't know how long, just standing there. No thoughts were able to process, his brain was on the fritz as he tried to absorb what had just taken place.

"……_Did that really happen?_" he wondered.

He absentmindedly pinched his arm, just to see if he was even awake.

It hurt.

"I…I'm awake…" he said softly.

And just like that, his brain clicked on to it. That was real. Sirius had come down there, they threw rocks in the lake and he's not mad about what happened and he agreed to go out with him and…then he left.

But he didn't leave until he'd agreed to go out with him.

He had a date with Sirius.

Sorry, repeat that, _he_ had a _date_ with _**SIRIUS**_

Remus looked at the lake…he chuckled "I…I have a date with Sirius…"

His chuckles grew a bit louder until he was all out laughing "Hahaha! I- I can't believe it! He…he's giving me chance?! I…I have a date with Sirius! Me! I mean…oh, oh wait, that means I have to think of what to do, god, I didn't even think he'd say 'yes' I haven't got any plans!"

Now mental aware of the situation, he rushed back to the castle.

"I have to talk to James or someone, _any_one who can help me plan this out. It has to go just right, this may be my only chance, I can't blow it!" he muttered to himself.

Though he felt nervous about it, he couldn't suppress the smile that came to his face as he went. It seemed that luck was finally on his side! He just made it up the second flight of stairs when he heard cackling ahead: "Filthy Filchy, can't catch the pestering Peeves!"

…Luck switched sides again.

He could go back down the stairs, but Peeves would probably see the top of his head and if he went the other direction his back would be seen, he was trapped!

There were a line of some coats of armor he could hide behind and maybe, _just maybe_, Peeves wouldn't notice. At of all the other options he had, this one seemed the best.

He quickly wedged himself between two of them and silently begged to be unnoticed…

…You know those situations that go from bad to worse?

Peeves cackled as he passed, completely over looking Remus it seemed. Still, Remus waited a moment or so before slowly moving from his hiding spot.

"HA! FOOLED YA!" a voice screeched behind him.

Remus turned to see the Poltergeist smirking deviously at him "Ohhh, naughty student out of bed…"

He didn't speak, he couldn't. If Filch caught him he'd get detention and that'd mean he'd have to cancel with Sirius and-

"Peeves, please…" he said softly, not knowing what else to say.

Peeves looked up, the evil look still on his transparent face "Should I tell? It's for your own good that this curfew is set…whatever should I do?" as he said this he moved next to one of the coats of armor and looked ready to push it over.

Remus clenched his fists anxiously "Don't do it, please."

Peeves grinned "I hope you're a fast runner!"

Remus had taken off almost as soon as the word left his mouth because the loud crashing of the suits of armor was enough to make anyone jump. A few of the portraits grumbled angrily at the sudden noise, but Remus ignored them and took off down the corridor. Maybe, he'd be able to get to the third floor and find a storage closet to hide out in.

Luck turned out to have suddenly hated him.

Just as he rounded a corner, Mrs. Norris meowed, not loudly, but enough to get his attention. The look on her face was that of satisfaction and he knew, there was no getting away now.

And sure enough, not more then a few moments later, Filch jogged to him, wheezing and gasping "You…detention…come with me!" he managed to say, grabbing the arm of his robes and walking to his office.

Mrs. Norris followed right beside him, purring in approval as they went. Remus frowned and wanted nothing more to give the cat a good kick, but why deepen the hole for himself?

He looked angrily at the ground "_What happened to my good fortune? And…what am I going to tell Sirius?_"

Just the thought of it made his stomach drop. All that trouble, all the nerve…and now he had to cancel and what's more, if he did, Sirius might think it was all just a joke and never really give him a chance again.

The air seemed to be getting thicker, harder to take into his lungs as they trudged down the corridor; his chest felt like it was collapsing in on itself.

How could such a great and wonderful day turn so horrible….

…In only 3 minutes?

James, now back in Gryffindor tower, turned over in his bed, trying to stay in blissful sleep. But the sun was an evil star first thing in the morning and in the end he reluctantly opened his eyes.

"Ugggghhh…ahh, damn sun…" he murmured, rubbing his eyes and head.

Some of the Quidditch members were able to sneak into Hagrid's firewhisky and, as promised, they saved a pint for their captain when he got the OK from Madam Pomfrey. He'd gladly drunk that pint and another…and another…and another…and another…and if he drank another or not he wasn't sure because thinking back to it made his head ache further.

"_Ahh…if people wanna make something useful they should come up with a spell to cure hangovers!_" he thought painful as his head throbbed.

Which there probably was somewhere, he just didn't know it.

And because of that, he'd have to deal with the feeling that a giant monkey wrench was on his head and squeezing tighter. The light was more painful then usual and he felt like he was going to throw up.

With a groan he laid back for a moment and closed his eyes…but sleep had left and he slowly got out of bed, staggering a bit. He bent to his trunk and started to get his cloths

"Wow, the dead can walk." A voice screeched painfully in James' sensitive ears.

"Ahhh! Please, don't yell." He whimpered, abandoning the cloths to rub his head.

"Hm, hangover, should've expected as much." The voice said, though the tone had softened a bit.

James turned to see Remus walking into the room, holding his nightclothes and towel. If that wasn't enough evidence to say he'd just taken a shower, the dampness of his hair gave it away.

"So how long did the party last?" he asked dully.

James scrunched his eyes shut "I don't even know how I got up here, don't ask me…"

Remus only nodded before putting his stuff away and sitting on his bed. It was now that James could see the evident misery on his friend's face as he stared at the ground.

James sighed and got up from his trunk, being a good friend could be a pain sometimes.

"Alright, what's up?" he asked, plopping himself right next to him on his bed.

At first Remus didn't answer, just continued to stare at the ground gloomily…finally he said softly, without looking up "I have detention…"

James blinked "…Uh-ha…is that it?"

He sighed and closed his eyes "It's not the detention that bothers me. Yesterday, Sirius finally agreed to go out with me-"

James' eyes widened "You serious?"

Remus gave him an annoyed look "No he is. Yes James, I'm serious. Unlike you, I haven't had a drop of whisky touch my lips; it wasn't just a drunken fantasy."

James smiled "Well that's great!"

Remus frowned "NO, it's NOT! Didn't you just hear what I said?! I have detention today! Or is that stupid drunk stupor still your current state of being so you can't understand?!" he shouted frustratedly.

"Don't…yell, PLEASE!" James begged, squeezing his head tightly.

Remus sighed heavily and closed his eyes again "Sorry…I'm still a bit peeved about the turn of events…god, why today? Why now, of all times? He finally gives me a chance and I screw it up! I'm gonna have to cancel and if I do, what if he never takes me seriously again? My one chance…gone…"

It was quiet after that, though not quiet enough in James' opinion.

He sighed and gently put a hand on Remus' back "Well…I'm sure he'll understand-"

"But what if he doesn't?! What if he thinks I was just do all this to make a fool out of him…what if he thinks I had it all planned out like this, what if he thinks I was just playing around…what if…he never wants to speak to me again…" his voice had started out forcefully but now softened to almost nothing.

James was glad to hear his voice lessen but knew it wasn't a good thing.

He shook his head "Oh Moony…you…you and all you're 'what ifs'! What if the world ended today? What if the muggles somehow found out about our world? What if all the giants left in the world banned together to get revenge on all the witches and wizards in the world? What if…giant purple kangaroos fell from the sky and threw carrots at everyone while screaming about how they lost their shoes?!"

Remus gave him a look after that last one "…Are you still drunk?"

"No, that's just the first thing to come to mind, but don't change the subject! Point is, you can't just think a 'what if' to everything in life. I mean, yeah, ok, that all _could_ happen, but you can't say. The only way to find out is to _live_ it. Tell him about detention, maybe he'll surprise you. Nothing you _think_ will happen is set and stone."

Remus stared at him for a moment before dropping his gaze to the ground "I…I dunno James…"

As though on cue, there was a small grunt and movement to their right, where Sirius' bed was…he sounded like he was just waking up.

James grinned and grabbed his arm "Come on, you can tell him right now, I'm here for ya!"

Remus' eyes widened "What? NOW?!"

James nodded "Yeah, come on!"

"No, no, no, James, I- I really don't think I can, not so soon, just…couldn't it wait a few more hours?" Remus protest as James dragged him over to Sirius' bed.

James made a face "Don't be such a baby about it! Come on, you can do it!"

Remus shook his head "No, I don't think I can, let go!" but James ignored his pleas.

"_Alright James, you asked for it!_" he thought.

He stopped struggling and came right next to James' ear and said "No!" firmly.

Though in reality, he'd only just emphasized the word but to James' ear he might as well had had a megaphone and screamed it as loud as he could into his ear.

"AHHH! GODDAMNIT REMUS!" he howled in pain.

But his cringing agony was enough to get his robe out of James' grasp and he was out the door. Just in time to, for once he left Sirius sat up from his bed in pure shock "What the- James? What's wrong?"

"Stupid werewolf vocal cords…" James managed to say through his gritted teeth.

Sirius blinked "Um…what?"

James closed his eyes "Argh, he…he yelled in my ear…"

Sirius looked around the room, Remus was no longer there.

"…But, I didn't really hear a yell, aside from you screaming right next to my bed." He whispered, a little annoyed at the end.

James frowned, still clenching his head "10 pints of firewhisky entitles me to a hangover, don't you think?"

Sirius scoffed "Oh right, the drinking game. Come on Prongs, back to bed…" he was kind enough to keep his voice at the whisper level while helping him to his feet.

They tottered a bit as they walked back to James' bed. Carrying most of your friend's body weight first thing in the morning was harder then he'd first thought.

Eventually, he managed to lunch James back into his own bed.

"There. Now what the hell are you going on about?" he asked, a bit snappishly for being so rudely awoken.

James closed his eyes for a moment, as if trying to go back to sleep, but opened them again "I was trying to get him to tell you something but he didn't want to so he yelled in my ear and ran out, coward…" he muttered angrily.

Sirius frowned at that "Don't call him that, what'd he want to tell me?"

James started to open his mouth but stopped then smirked "No, you know what? I'm not gonna tell you, _he'll_ tell you. That'll get him back for this…"

Sirius rolled his eyes "Fine, I'll go ask him."

James turned over in his bed and pulled his blankets over his head "Good luck with that."

Sirius cast him one last fleeting look before heading downstairs, still in his pajamas.

Remus sighed desolately as he sat in the common room. There were tons of places for him to sit, but he sat on the biggest couch, that fit at least 5 people. Just incase he were to suddenly get sleepy, he didn't want to risk going back in the dorm room. The great escape was a success. Attempting to cheer himself up rarely worked, but he gave it a shot.

He would have left Gryffindor tower altogether, but he was afraid of leaving to early. When the 'proper time' to be up and about without getting in trouble was a mystery to him and he didn't want to risk doing anything stupid and lengthening his sentence.

"_What does it matter, I had to cancel anyway and he'll probably never take me seriously again…more detention does make any difference._" A part of him thought pessimistically.

"_Well…maybe…James was right, about all that stuff…_" a smaller part said, with little confidence.

He scoffed aloud "Yeah right, and after that all the pigs in the world'll try to over-throw man kind."(1)

"Really? Well, my favorite barn animal is a horse but pigs are ok to, I guess. Mind the stench of course." A different voice said.

Remus knew who had spoken immediately, yet he still jumped when he did. He bit his lip "Sirius…"

Sirius yawned as he walked over to him "Hey."

Remus looked at the ground "Uh, good…morning…" he murmured.

"Heh, James would appreciate it if you kept that tone around him. Maybe I'll get some strong tea for him from the kitchen." Sirius said, more to himself then to Remus.

He still seemed partially asleep.

"Er, yeah…" Remus said, not really knowing what else to say.

Sirius sat on the couch and Remus quickly took his seat again.

He smiled a sleepy smile "Well don't sound too excited about it, you'll wake up the whole tower."

Remus smiled back, but it was only halfway. Did James tell him or was he going to have to?

"_Knowing him, he probably just told him I wanted to tell him something…git…_" he thought.

Sirius sighed "It's weird, waking up to your friend yelling in pain…he said you yelled in his ear or something…"

Remus frowned "I didn't yell."

"I know, I'd have heard you…and then, he says somethin' about you wanting to tell me something?" at this he looks him straight in the eyes, trapping him in the conversation.

Remus bit the inside of his mouth but didn't speak.

Sirius smiled slightly "What, you getting cold feet about all this?"

Remus shook his head "No, never. It's not that…but…"

Sirius raised his eyebrows slightly "…Buuuut?"

"…But…well…y-you know how we were out by the lake, after curfew? Well, I didn't have the best of luck…sneaking back in here, I mean…" he said, mentally hitting himself for sounding stupid.

Sirius blinked "You got detention then?"

"Not on purpose though!" he found himself saying, once more to his feet "I tried getting out of it o-or changing it to some other day but Filch is a stupid prat a-and that damn cat of his! I swear, I'd never choose detention over you, who the hell would?! I wasn't trying to bail, I really wasn't! I'd much rather go somewhere with you then serve stupid detention! Just…give me a chance to make it up to you; don't think I'm making this all up! Please, I'm really serious, I…it wasn't my fault! But…well, if you never want to give me another chance…I guess…I deserve it…"

To his immense surprise, Sirius laughed.

He had a hand over his mouth to keep it quiet but it was obvious he was laughing pretty hard; Remus couldn't help but feel a little angry at this. He'd just poured his heart out and now he was _laughing_.

Something must have shown on his face because Sirius put both hands up defensively and lowered his laughter to a chuckle "Easy, easy! I not laughing at what you said just…heh, you really think I'm that cruel?"

Remus blinked, he didn't dare speak and mess this up.

Sirius grinned widely "Ah Moony, I thought you knew me!"

"I didn't…say you were cruel…" he murmured, looking at the ground.

This just made Sirius laugh again "No, but you were apologizing like I was going to kill you!"

Remus didn't respond, he stared at the ground and felt heat raising to his face. More then likely, he was probably as red as a tomato in the face; he felt embarrassed enough to be.

Sirius took a deep breath and was able to swallow his laughter, but it still shined in his eyes when he spoke "Sorry, I'm sorry. I'm not trying to be insensitive-"

"Well you're doing a lousy job at it." Remus muttered.

Sirius snickered "Heh, I know. Sensitivity isn't really my thing."

Again, Remus didn't answer.

Sirius sighed "Oh don't be like that. Come here…"

Remus looked up to see Sirius was motioning him to sit back down, next to him.

"…Well come here!" Sirius repeated again, though now he was smiling.

Remus timidly sat once more, though he still didn't look Sirius in the eye.

But, Sirius didn't seem to care as he went on "As I was saying, I'm not trying to be insensitive, but you're just so…funny." He said the word 'funny' rather abruptly, as though he were going to say something else but changed it at the last minute.

Remus looked up and gave him a confused look.

Sirius quickly recovered with a smile "I don't mind Remus. I know it's not your fault or anything, I'm actually kind of surprised you'd think I would blame you for it."

Remus glanced at his feet "Well…I just thought…if you knew I was going to have to cancel…you wouldn't take me seriously, you'd think I just did all this to make a fool out of you and…y-you'd hate me for all eternity…"

Sirius chuckled "There, you're doing it again!"

Remus closed his eyes embarrassedly, but they snapped open when he felt Sirius put an arm around his shoulder, pulling him closer.

Sirius didn't notice or ignored his sudden attention as he went on "You're acting like I'm some heartless prick! As if I wouldn't understand mistakes. Me, of all people, who's made more mistakes then I dare count. I'm not gonna hold anything against you or make stupid assumptions like that! If you tell me with your own mouth that this was a joke well, even then I might not believe you. You're too nice to mess with someone's feelings…"

Remus' mouth went dry; he didn't know what to say to that.

"I'm not gonna persecute you for something that isn't your fault. Ok?" Sirius said softly.

Remus felt his heart rate quicken, he hadn't been this close to Sirius in what felt like ages. He didn't know what to do; his brain had taken flight and left him in the situation alone.

Those gorgeous gray eyes stared back at him with understanding and caring…he felt his head nod, though he didn't give the command for it to.

Sirius smiled "Alright. I'll catch you later then; I'm going to try squeezing an hour in before we have to actually wake up. See ya at breakfast."

Again, Remus nodded but his voice box seemed broken and all he could do was watch Sirius as he ascended the stairs, mostly on his swaying hips and backside…left, left, left right left…they'd been really close just moments ago, the last time they were that close…

He shot up from his seat and walked strangely to the showers again.

"_Stupid hormones!_" he thought as he left.

Sirius gently closed the door to the dorm once he was in and tip-toed into the room. It seemed James had already managed to get back to sleep. He was sure to close the curtains to the windows before getting into bed.

With the room nice and dark, he could finally get back to sleep…except, one thing kept rolling around in his mind.

"_I almost called him 'cute' back there…_" he thought.

When he'd said 'funny' it was the best cover up he could think of for the word.

"_Did you see him in there? Of course that was cute!_"

"_Well yeah, it was, but guys don't call other guys cute. Cute's not macho._"

"_If anyone else had seen that, I bet you everyone one of them would tell you that was cute._"

"_I'm not saying it WASN'T cute, just…that was a close save._"

"_Why do you care? It's just Remus, you don't have to impress him. Manly or not I think he likes you._"

"_Even still, cute's not a word I often say to describe…anything. I don't even use cute on __**girls**__! Girls are hot or attractive…not cute…_"

"_I don't think it matters either way…_"

"_You're probably right…still, I wish…oh, what is it all those muggles are always saying? Er…I wish I had that on tape or whatever, so I could watch it again…that was so cute…_"

He chuckled lightly at the thought of it.

Just thinking back to Remus' jumbled worlds, blushing face, embarrassed eyes…it was positively adorable!

"_Ok, that's where I draw the line. NOTHING is __**adorable**_" He mentally corrected.

Even still, the image of it made him smile as he closed his eyes to sleep.

The rest of the day went by so fast, was almost as though it were in fast-forward. Remus spent most of the day dwelling on his little talk with Sirius that morning and it had him in a good mood all day.

It was only when detention came to be that the great mood vanished.

Everyone knew Filch's little cubby that he liked to pretend was an office was down, closer to the Great Hall and it was as small and dank and windowless as ever.

As he walked in the open door, Filch grinned nastily at him "Finally, justice is served to you little punks."

Remus inwardly rolled his eyes and mentally prepared himself for the speech that was almost ALWAYS said when serving detention.

Filch inclined with his head for Remus to follow him and the two of them walked outside his office. As they did, he spoke "You no good little prats. Always runnin' around whenever you please! Wand wavin' at everythin' and acting high and mighty above everyone else, just because you can do a few magic tricks, always taking everything for granted! You-"

"You no good little monster. Just because you know the magic, doesn't give you the right to disrespect the authority of hard working adults." Remus thought along with him as he said it, but both he and Filch looked up in surprise as another voice said it to.

"We'll have to learn that someday, the authority we're under is to protect us, but of course, you do it just to teach us a lesson and in no way want us to have a better life, you hate us, and we can all…burn, in hell. Yeah, I think we've been over that." The person continued as they came down the stairway.

Remus couldn't fight back a grin as Sirius gave a huge fake yawn.

Filch scowled "Shut your yapper Black! You were thrown on me at last end of the day and if you're here, I'll have to give you an especially nasty job today!"

Sirius grinned "Of course! I wonder if they let guests into hell this late in the evening…"

Remus put a hand over his mouth in an attempt to silence his laughter.

Filch's face went a bit red "Alright, that's **enough**! I've got a job for you two, follow me!" and practically marched down the corridor.

Sirius grinned and silently waved as he made his way down.

"Sirius what're you-"

"Shhh, can't talk now, if he thinks we know each other we'll get different things." He whispered, though not looking or stopping towards him and continuing after Filch.

It was always Sirius and James serving detention, only a few times had he and Peter been involved and Filch probably thought that those times, it was just that they were by-standards in it all that got caught in the mess, so he didn't realize they knew each other at all. Remus nodded in understanding and followed a good distance behind him, even going as far as looking uneasily at him to encourage the thought.

Filch grumbled angrily under his breath as they made their way. And to their surprise, he went outside.

"_Forbidden forest duty, maybe…_" Remus thought to himself as they went.

Oh, if only they were so lucky.

Filch walked a good ways until they came up to the Owlery and then he stopped "Alright, I've been putting this off for awhile, just for you Black."

Sirius gasped dramatically "For me? Why old Filch, you shouldn't have! I…I didn't know you cared…I'm touched that you-"

"SHUT UP! You mangy pole cat! You two'll be cleanin' the Owlery BY HAND until DAWN!" Filch screeched furiously.

Sirius nodded "Alright."

"There'll be two back up there and two shovels. It better be _spotless_ when I get back, or I'll see to it you're finishing it tomorrow night." Filch grumbled.

Sirius saluted "Sir, yes sir, Filch sir, on the double sir!"

Remus bit his lip, Sirius better stop or he was gonna break a lung by keeping in all this laughter.

Filch gave him a murderous look and you could practically see what was going through his head when he did. He wanted nothing more then for Sirius to just suddenly drop dead…but none such thing happened and he just marched away angrily, cursing under his breath.

The two of them stood under the Owlery in silence for a moment, even after he was far from eye sight. Slowly they looked at one another…someone giggled (though it was a manly one, not a girly little 'heeheehee') through their teeth…which led to more giggles, then laughing softly and then all out laughing, spooking the owls a bit as they went up the stairs.

"Hahahaha! Sirius, what on earth are you doing here?" Remus asked between bouts of laughter.

Sirius smiled "Well, we did have a date planned, and Sirius Black is not one to be stood up!"

Remus blinked "Wha?"

"Come on, think of it! Just the two of us…this could be our date!" he said, though Remus couldn't tell if he was joking or not.

"You…wha? But…but don't you want something better then _this_?" he gestured at the owls dung which was virtually everywhere.

Sirius grinned "Oh come on! It's perfect! Just the two of us, under the brightly shining stars…the moon's not even out yet, and we're shoveling loads of owl dung by hand. If that's not romantic I don't know what is!"

Remus laughed a bit at that and shook his head "How trivial…still…I just thought, you'd want to have this be…well…a bit more special then…being here in detention."

Sirius shrugged "Well, that's just my style. I've never snuck out of detention to go on a date before though, this'll be fun!"

Remus gapped at him "What? But don't we have to-"

"Ah, ah, ah! Don't underestimate me now…" he said, turning his back for a moment. But when he turned back around he had two wands in hand with a huge grin.

Remus' eyes widened "You-"

"The best thing to do when you get detention is start getting Filch steamed and fast. If you do, there's the off chance he might be so angry, he just wants to get away from you as soon as possible and will forget to check and take your wands from you. James and I were able to do it a few times, but only a few, he started to catch on after awhile. But I got him this time!" Sirius said, grinning at his own cunning and throwing Remus his wand as well.

Remus caught it with surprise, but slowly smiled and rolled his eyes "I'd never had known."

Sirius winked and pointed at the bags and the shovels, which sprang to life and began working. He laughed "Yes! Ah, I _love_ these nonverbal spells! Genius…well, lets be off then." and turned to the door.

Remus blinked "Where to?"

Sirius stopped and looked back at him in surprise "What, you don't have anything planned? You're the one who asked me, you've got to take me somewhere."

Remus felt his face heat up again, as it had this morning and once more, his mouth started moving embarrassedly, without his permission "Well I didn't think you'd be coming _today!_ It's not like you really told me or anything! How was I suppose to-"

Sirius laughed "Calm down! I'm just joking! I didn't tell 'cuz I wanted it to be a surprise. Hm, well, we've got until dawn, let's go to Hogsmeade. They usually keep their places open until 12, it's only 9!"

Remus stopped his rambling "…Hey, that actually sounds like a…a pretty good idea!"

Sirius grinned "So, come on!"

With the shovels and the bags working on their own, the two of them went out of the Whomping Willow and in the passage to Shrieking Shack. Remus noticed going through the tunnel was a lot different when you weren't on the verge of turning into a werewolf. Normally, he wouldn't have been able to feel the pain in his knees and eyes when a bit of dirt got kicked up, still, it was better then having that prickling feeling on the inside.

Behind him, Sirius was doing some thinking.

"_He is a bit handsome…in his own sort of way, I guess…_"

"_Yeah…and he's got a nice ass to…_"

Needless to say, he was glad it was a dark tunnel only lit slightly by wand light.

Eventually, they were able to reach the trap door of the Shrieking Shack.

Remus brushed the dirt out of his hair and coughed a bit as they entered the Shack "Ok. Home sweet home…" he said jokingly.

Sirius chuckled as he got out of the tunnel "Yep. Good times here, like that time you went crazy and attacked…good times…"

Remus shook his head and the two of them went to the front door.

"Hey, you know, I've been thinking…" Sirius said slowly.

"You should be careful doing that, I hear you could break something." Remus said, without looking back.

Sirius made a face "Oooh, funny. No listen, I've been thinking, your wolf form knew us by our names. James was James to him."

Remus blinked "…Your point?"

"Well, maybe, if we use our nicknames, you know call him Prongs, instead of James, maybe we can start coming back with you up here when your, monthly visitor arrives…" he said with a snicker.

Remus sighed "Are you serious?"

"Last time I checked I was." He replied, beaming.

Remus gave him a look "Now who's being the funny one? The wolf has a sense of smell, when it smells you guys, it'll know!"

Sirius shrugged "I dunno, I think he'll be to busy smelling me to notice Prongs and Wormtail."

For the third time in one day, Remus felt his face get red "Do you have to put it like that?" he muttered embarrassedly.

Sirius grinned "Yep! Because embarrassing you is my life mission!"

"_And because you look so damn adorable when you're embarrassed!_" he added in his head.

Remus smiled slightly "Well…if you really think it'll work…"

"It's worth a shot." Sirius said casually.

Remus seemed to be mulling it over "Wellll…lets just go see Hogsmeade; we can talk about that later."

Sirius mock bowed "Yes my lord!"

"Oh stop. Come on." Remus said amusedly.

Well, he didn't know about Sirius, but for Remus, this was one of the best dates he'd ever been on, including the other dates he'd had with Sirius. They messed around in Zonko's and bought a few things, they were good friends with the owner so they were able to screw around without getting in trouble for it, testing the products before buying.

It was because once, James and Sirius had brought Zonko's a lot of business. When the two started saying they got most of their prank ideas from his shop, near half the school purchased his stuff.

After that, they visited the little book store Remus had found before and pretended to be interested in buying books. Sirius read a few aloud in funny voices and accents, which made Remus once more have to bite his tongue to keep from laughing so loud…but eventually, it was to much and the two got thrown out.

Sirius huffed a bit at the lady, but didn't make too big a fuss over it. Next they went to Three Broomsticks where they drank butterbeer and laughed and talked about random things, just having a good time.

It was here that Remus noticed something. He hadn't been injured _once_ on this entire date! It had to have been a miracle! But, more likely, it was probably due to that fact that, when Sirius wasn't _trying_ to be romantic, it just kind of came naturally. Just listening to him talk, laughing and making him laugh to…it was almost as though, he were under the potion again. The only really difference was physical contact. When the potion was in play, he was all touchy-feely, putting his arm around him, kissing his cheek, holding his hands, all that! This time however, he kept his hands to himself, but still having a great time overall.

Remus smiled at this, it was probably best not to rush physical stuff and now that Sirius was in the right state of mind, he probably knew that to.

They got a few things from Honeydukes to eat in the shack because even if the town was closing down for the night, they didn't really feel like going back to clean up bird crap.

They probably stacked up on enough sweets to feed the Gryffindor tower and snuck back to the shack, were once more, they talked and laughed as they sat in the bedroom-ish area.

Remus laughed "No way!"

"No really! I turned her cloak into a bunch of frogs and they started croaking like mad! She screamed so loud and ordered me detention for 3 days!" Sirius said, laughing.

Remus laughed and shook his head "I…haha, I think you went a little overboard with trying to get here!"

Sirius shrugged "It's weird, whenever I actually TRY to get in detention no one wants to punish me!"

Remus smiled as he finished off a cream cluster "Well, maybe it's that. If you _want_ punishment, I doubt they'd give it cuz then it wouldn't be punishment."

Sirius nodded "Yeah, I guess."

"You know, this is nice." Remus said, more to himself then to Sirius.

Sirius blinked "Hm?"

Remus smiled "This. Just hanging out, talking and stuff…it's nice. Better then a few of our other dates…"

Sirius chuckled "Oh, I remember a few of those. Knocking you out from head-trauma's not exactly what I'd call a successful date."

Remus laughed "That one has to take the cake! But really, when you're relaxed and stuff, you're pretty good at this romance stuff. It's almost like the love potion thing all over again…"

Sirius said nothing to this.

For a moment neither said anything, just ate a few more sweets and drank some butterbeer. Madam Rosmerta was kind enough to give them a few bottles or so.

Then, Sirius spoke "Did you…" he started unsurely.

Remus looked back at him "Hm?"

He sighed "Did you…like…well, me? Or the person you were with when I was out cold?"

Remus stared at him for a moment before he realized what he meant.

"I mean, it wasn't really _me_ with you, with the potion and all…I like to think of it as 'the other me' or something." He said slowly.

"Oh no, it was you alright." Remus said, opening another butterbeer.

Sirius turned so quickly he rubbed his neck "What?"

Remus smiled "Well, it's not like you acted any different then you usually do. You were just as cocky, just as arrogant and just as savvy as you are now. The only real differences I can see is that logic, was taken COMPLETELY out of your head as was rational reasoning."

Sirius blinked "…Really?"

Remus nodded "Hm-hm…that, and you did this a lot." As he said this he grabbed Sirius' hand.

Sirius' eyes widened slightly, but when Remus did nothing more, he relaxed.

"Physical contact wasn't that big a deal to you." Remus said, just incase Sirius didn't get it.

Sirius looked down "…You like, that sort of thing?"

Remus shrugged, releasing his hand "Oh I don't know. It doesn't really matter to me. I just like being with you, talking with you…you know, I think I'd always liked you…it just took me a long time to figure it out and stop hiding from it. It was that date, when we had the encounter with the centaurs that it came to me…the way you comforted me then. The way you, talked to me…I'm sure that, even if there hadn't been a potion, you'd have spoken to me the same way, whether or not you'd almost kiss me I'm not sure, but I think you'd have been just as comforting. I was talking to _you_, not some other person…if you could remember that memory; I think you'd see it was you all along, just with logic and reason gone…"

Sirius said nothing to that.

His hand felt…bare, now that Remus wasn't holding it…cold…

He frowned slightly "Centaurs…it was in the Forbidden Forest?"

Remus smiled "Not your brightest idea, but it's the thought that counts…"

Sirius nodded silently and stared at the ground for a moment…then slowly stood up.

Remus gave him a surprised look "Sirius? What's wrong?"

He didn't answer, just walked to the window that pointed in Hogwarts direction…he could just see the edge of the Forbidden Forest and concentrated on it with all his might.

Looking at something triggered a memory before, maybe it could this time. It's not that he didn't believe Remus word, but he wanted to see for himself.

He waited…and waited…a good 13 minutes passed and still nothing! He was slightly surprised Remus hadn't done or said anything in this time and he was starting to lose hope…stupid memories, they only came at random!

Remus finally got up and came up behind him "Hey, are you ok?" he asked, placing a hand on his shoulder.

The words barely registered in Sirius' mind as suddenly his mind's eye opened: _He and Remus walking to the forest, talking…Remus has a strange look on his face, he asks what wrong. Remus breaking down almost completely, sobbing about the girl he'd killed. Himself, hugging Remus, talking to him…a couple of centaurs arrive, they start talking, one calls Remus a monster and he snaps. Himself, yelling at them, them getting angry…he and Remus ran in the cold rain, the centaurs shooting at them._

Outside of his mind, his eyes were wide and blank…it was almost frightening.

Remus shook him a bit "Sirius? Sirius…are you, ok?"

He didn't answer, his didn't respond at all! He just stood there, staring, his face blank…as if he were zoning out…then suddenly the life came back into his eyes and he blinked a few times.

Remus smiled at his return "You always get like that when you're remembering something?"

Sirius blinked a few more times "…Get like what?"

"You…oh…er, never mind. You did just remember something right?" Remus asked.

Sirius nodded "Yeah…sometimes, when I look at something, it triggers a memory. That's what I was trying to do."

Remus stared at his feet for a moment "And you…remembered, that incident?"

Sirius nodded "Oh yeah. You know, I think…you've got a point there. I'd have said that…but I wouldn't have been dense enough to pick a fight with centaurs!"

Remus chuckled "I tried to stop you…"

Sirius nodded.

And then nothing was said…it was quiet enough for them to here the wind rattling the little house, though it wasn't howling and shaking the place…

"You know I…I've never really been with…another guy, before…" Sirius said awkwardly.

Remus shrugged "Well, neither had I."

"I like how I was in the memory better…" Sirius muttered.

Remus blinked "Oh?"

He nodded "…'This is only flesh! And it's not your flesh I'm after'…pht, what a corny line…I wish I could think like that."

"Well, it came from your mouth, so I assume you do." Remus said slowly.

Sirius smiled slightly "Yeah?"

Remus nodded "Yeah…" he paused for a moment "…I know it's not easy but just, stop thinking about gender and stuff. Who cares? It's no one else's business anyways. Love is love and if they've got issues they could all just bugger off."

Sirius smiled a bit more "How outspoken of you…"

"Well, it's true." He said confidently.

Again, silence…but it was a far more comfortable silence then the one before it.

Sirius walked away from the window and slowly approached Remus. Remus didn't back away but didn't look slightly confused.

"Well…if you're willing to try…I don't see why I shouldn't. You're a great person Remus, I really mean that. Maybe, who knows, this could work out and…well, even if it doesn't, can we be friends?" Sirius said slowly, no sign of joking anywhere on him.

Remus beamed "I'd like that a lot Sirius."

Sirius grinned "Good. I would to."

They laughed a little…then looked at each other a while, as though having a telepathic conversation. Sirius moved a bit closer, until his was right in front of him. Remus' heart beat a little fast with every step towards him he took.

His cheeks started to burn again. Dammit! He got embarrassed to easily, he thought, thinking also about how stupid he probably looked right now.

Sirius came to a stop when they were face to face. For a moment it seemed like a stare down because that's all they did. They just stared at one another, though Sirius was just a tiny bit taller.

"…I'm not…really use to this…so forgive me if I mess it up…" he said softly as he leaned forward.

Remus thought process got as far as '_Oh God'_ before he felt his lips gently brushed against Sirius'. It was a timid, unsure sort of kiss. Remus kissed back, just to give him a bit of confidence and pulled him closer. Sirius' eyes widened a bit in surprise but he didn't back away from him.

Both cursed the need for oxygen when they did pull away.

Sirius smiled "…That's the first time I've really kissed anyone since Gloria left…"

Remus didn't answer, not really knowing what to say to that.

"…You kiss a lot better then her." Sirius said with a chuckle.

Remus blushed _again_, he was starting to feel so stupid and looked at the ground to hide it. But, again, Sirius surprised him and lifted his head so he could see his blushing face.

"Hm…you're so cute when you're embarrassed." He said softly, leaning forward once more.

Remus blinked "I…I am?"

Sirius nodded "Down right adorable, even…"

Remus racked his brains to find some memory _anywhere_ when Sirius had used the words 'cute' and 'adorable'…none came up. He remembered Sirius once saying those words weren't macho, manly enough for him to use as a description…but he just did…

Accidents always happen and people usually learn from them or get punished for them which makes people _hate_ accidents…but this was one accident he was glad happened.

A wide smile came to Remus face as his and Sirius' lips once more met.

**THE END!!**

* * *

END, end A/N: WOOOOOT! YES! Alright! I love that ending! Sorries guys, but after this point, I just couldn't see it going anywhere. All good things, must one day come to an end. Sorry! Hope you all liked the fic, I thank all of you who've stuck with me through it, you're all great! Really guys, I couldn't have done it without you. More then once I felt like just abandoning the fic, but you guys kept me going. Thanks, I'm glad you did. Hope you really enjoyed. Who knows, there might be another one in the near future. See ya guys, HAPPY EASTER!! (Again)


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